Met on the Internet... worried about prejudice

[Badgerella 5]

it's the 21st century, internet relationship is normal now... so you are ok...

While I am well aware of the fact that this is the 21st century and that internet relationship and just the internet overall are perfectly normal and common, I still wouldn't agree with this.

While my fiance and I met on the Internet, too, in a game that, oddly enough, wasn't WOW, I still won't be surprised if anyone asks questions about it. Why? Because I was outright denied a tourist visa a year and a half ago because of - the Internet. The only problem the CO had with me was her 'confusion and worry' about how would someone (I am an adult, and not even in my 20s anymore) dare travel overseas to spend time with someone they have not seen in person, but instead met online. So she said she couldn't grant me the visa, basically for my own security.

Welcome to the 21st century, lady? And that kind of thing.

We'll, however, stick to the truth and hopefully this time it won't bite us. It has in the past, heh. With this, as well as many other things.

[Danu 19]

So many of us have met online and in games that I doubt many of the interviewers are shocked by it. My Fiance and I met online (in WoW), became good friends and then met in person and decided to turn our relationship into something more. Now we are engaged and applying as well. If it wasnt for the internet I would not have met the love of my life. If it helps at all, one of my friends (in the same guild) just did the whole K-1 process as well, they met through our guild online as well, and he was approved. He is moving to the states in April!

[Stinky Monkey 1]

Not a problem we met on Myspace

[Damian&Kelly 16]

It's so common with these Long distance relationships, My husband and I met online on pokerstars.com.

[Old Dominion 26]

Thanks everybody for the responses. I'm reassured... but my fiancee may require a little more convincing. She had a traumatic experience when we applied for our first visa - our B-2 interview lasted all of 10 seconds.

Tourist visas from China and many other countries are almost always denied in cases like hers. An unattached woman who has no way to convince the CO that she absolutely needs to return to China. That's sad, but true.

[Noa&Mia 0]

Dear users,

I've been reading the forums and guides on VJ for a while now to get guidance and encouragement on my I-129F Petition. I filed late last year and got approved in four months.

In particular, there is one thing I am worried about in my Chinese fiancee's upcoming interview.

The V.O. will probably ask my fiancee about the circumstances under which we met. In June 2007, we met on FaceRen, a social networking site (like a Chinese version of Facebook). I have since traveled to China twice to meet her, I love her a lot, and I have asked her to marry me. We have plenty of evidence of our relationship (letters, emails, conversation records, photos).

I'm specifically worried that the V.O. will have a prejudice against Internet relationships. I'm aware that there are many scams involving the K-1 visa and many of these fraudulent relationships start online. I certainly hope that the V.O. won't reject our application just because we met online, but I am worried enough about this that I'm considering making up other stories and asking my fiancee to tell the officer a false story.

I'm really hoping that some of you lucky couples had online beginnings, and have had experience discussing online relationships with the V.O. There's some stigma associated with online relationships because so many of them don't work out, and I just want to know how the Consulate people feel about them.

Thanks so much!

Hi LPW

Dont worry about that! many of us have met online! It is just normal nowdays!!!

Remember that on the interview there is no reason to lie! say the truth! It doesnt matter the way you met, the important thing is that you met, fell in love, and want to share a life together!

When we apply for the I129, Noah wrote a letter explaining how we met and fell in love, and he ofcourse mentioned that we did first met at Hi5 online! and we were apptroved!! hehe and at our interview we will be telling the same if they ask!

So keep positive, and always say the truth at the embassy,

good luck!

Mia

[eri-ola 0]

I havent meet online so I don't know much how that goes but from what I have read here I think it's very normal. It should not be a problem just answer and give them what they ask for nothing to worry. They wont stop or judge you how you meet as long as you have seen each other in person. Just keep everything all the evidence.

GOOD LUCK!

[EasyRider 3]

There would be more of a concern with the manner of how you met if you had met through a marriage broker or family member.

I've read this a lot here on VJ and I'm wondering why that is the case. I get the whole marriage broker thing but what's so bad about meeting through a family member? Just curious. I met my fiance online too, by the way.

[Nik+Heather 122]

There would be more of a concern with the manner of how you met if you had met through a marriage broker or family member.

I've read this a lot here on VJ and I'm wondering why that is the case. I get the whole marriage broker thing but what's so bad about meeting through a family member? Just curious. I met my fiance online too, by the way.

The reason it is bad to meet through these means is that there is a high possibility for an ulterior motive. If someone who doesn't know anyone from the US wants to come here to marry someone, it is much more likely that the relationship is real than if someone who really wants their sister/cousin/brother/uncle etc to come to the states with them introduces that person to a USC to petition for them- In that circumstance, there are motives other than just pure love that might get someone to come over. Once one person gets perm resident, then they open the gates to petition other family members...Anyway, without hijacking the whole thread, I wanted to answer your question...

[MapleLeafBaby 1]

TELL THE TRUTH.... one lie, leads to another, leads to another... if you are thruthful... then that shall prevail...

Good luck

[John and Camie 39]

Aww, no worries! I met my Honey on YouTube ... we were friends first, then he came to stay with me while attending a film festival where his film was in competition. And that's when friendship turned into love. Good luck to you!!

[SuperDuper! 230]

It seems there is confusion among the community regarding which websites constitute being a "marriage broker."

Are sites like CherryBlossums.com or FilipinaHeart.com or Yahoo Personals considered "Marriage Brokers"?

We dont know whether to mark Yes or No on the 129F regarding the use of "Marriage Broker"

Dear users,

I've been reading the forums and guides on VJ for a while now to get guidance and encouragement on my I-129F Petition. I filed late last year and got approved in four months.

In particular, there is one thing I am worried about in my Chinese fiancee's upcoming interview.

The V.O. will probably ask my fiancee about the circumstances under which we met. In June 2007, we met on FaceRen, a social networking site (like a Chinese version of Facebook). I have since traveled to China twice to meet her, I love her a lot, and I have asked her to marry me. We have plenty of evidence of our relationship (letters, emails, conversation records, photos).

I'm specifically worried that the V.O. will have a prejudice against Internet relationships. I'm aware that there are many scams involving the K-1 visa and many of these fraudulent relationships start online. I certainly hope that the V.O. won't reject our application just because we met online, but I am worried enough about this that I'm considering making up other stories and asking my fiancee to tell the officer a false story.

I'm really hoping that some of you lucky couples had online beginnings, and have had experience discussing online relationships with the V.O. There's some stigma associated with online relationships because so many of them don't work out, and I just want to know how the Consulate people feel about them.

Thanks so much!

You met on a social networking site, so no worries.

Any USG issues would be related to those that met through "marriage broker" websites, which spawned the International Marriage Brokers Act of 2006 (IMBRA). Marriage Broker websites charge fees for introductions and so forth.

All the best.

William.

[ellmvl 1]

I heard from an immigration lawyer that there will be a lil issues during the interview when a couple met in like a dating site or some sort of a mail order bride websites. I know somebody who met her partner in cherryblossoms.com and they never attempt to mention it during their interview...well she got approved.

Edited March 15, 2009 by ell

[raymaga 25]

At my K-1 interview, all the other couples there for their interviews had met on-line. I met my husband on-line too, on kiss.com (it's now match.com).

Like the others have said... as long as you don't tell any lies, you'll be fine.

Good luck.

[toddandhien 2]

OK, I just have to weigh in on this.

I do not advocate lying at the interview or on any of the forms required as part of the immigration process. The facts are the facts and one has to deal with them.

However, the vast majority of folks that have commented on this post have spouses or fiance(e)s from Canada, the UK or from Down Under. I doubt that meeting on-line is an issue for you folks, just like getting tourist visas to visit your loved one while waiting for the K1/K3 process is not a problem. This issue has to do with relationships between a USC and someone from China, SE Asia or other developing nations.

The interviews are much more difficult and the standard to be met in presenting a bona fide relationship is much higher. Relationships are scrutinized to a much higher degree. The manner in which the couple has met gets looked at very closely. Simply being in love and telling the truth will not ensure a smooth interview. Knowing that, one has to ensure that the evidence presented at the interview is thorough, complete and consistent and convincing.