Always amazed at how much people share

[Fandango 1,440]

i can guess...

i think certain folks here ..feel that they have no other outlet to voice their needs or personal life issues. i certainly would not do it..but that is me..

Guessing is fine.

Anonymity = deniability. Ain't it so?

arijit

he did say he wanted to get a new screen name!

I think its Jasman

[*Robert* 2]

i can guess...

i think certain folks here ..feel that they have no other outlet to voice their needs or personal life issues. i certainly would not do it..but that is me..

Guessing is fine.

Anonymity = deniability. Ain't it so?

arijit

he did say he wanted to get a new screen name!

I think its Jasman

[choji 0]

well I think a place like this breeds a sense of community....and people may feel that this is their 'safe haven' so to speak. so who better to talk to...especially when you dont have to look at anyone afterwards, lol

This has touched on several things here which are vital to understand why people are so open with their information (sometimes in quite amazing detail):

- a sense of community

- 'safe haven'

- you dont have to look at anyone afterwards (= anonymity)

This is all good and well, but the Internet is wide, wide open and what is out there stays out there. Any Tom, ####### or Harry can come on VJ and start snooping around and it is not too hard to put together "profiles" of people. In fact, I would suggest that you make the effort and try it for yourself with any reasonably "open" poster here on VJ, and you will most probably be shocked afterwards at the amount of data you have put together.

Something like this may not happen, but it can. Stalkers are everywhere, and the Internet is a bounty for them. So please beware just a bit about what you are putting out there, not only on VJ but other places too.

[*Robert* 2]

well I think a place like this breeds a sense of community....and people may feel that this is their 'safe haven' so to speak. so who better to talk to...especially when you dont have to look at anyone afterwards, lol

This has touched on several things here which are vital to understand why people are so open with their information (sometimes in quite amazing detail):

- a sense of community

- 'safe haven'

- you dont have to look at anyone afterwards (= anonymity)

This is all good and well, but the Internet is wide, wide open and what is out there stays out there. Any Tom, ####### or Harry can come on VJ and start snooping around and it is not too hard to put together "profiles" of people. In fact, I would suggest that you make the effort and try it for yourself with any reasonably "open" poster here on VJ, and you will most probably be shocked afterwards at the amount of data you have put together.

Something like this may not happen, but it can. Stalkers are everywhere, and the Internet is a bounty for them. So please beware just a bit about what you are putting out there, not only on VJ but other places too.

Very well said and good point! Cyberspace is far from safe and secure.

[Nessa 23]

maybe they can't afford therapy and have no1 in real life to ask for advice who knows

[Welshcookie 17]

I don't often post personal difficulties on here (I don't think so anyway..but maybe the post police will prove me wrong ) but I am not at all adverse to posting in a personal manner in response to another. I have however used PMs many times when I have needed advice in personal matters that I don't want to be public fodder....but still, it is seeking advice from ppl I have never met...I quite like that....I can get a more objective view on some things.....

having said that I do agree with the whole false sense of security of the internet.....I once googled welshcookie and almost fell over lol

Edited May 25, 2006 by welshcookie

[Ladylethal 12]

Maybe because of a few recent really detailed threads, I sit here and am truly amazed at how much people share about their private lives....everything from troubles in the marriage, family problems, health issues, financial woes, etc.... It's not that I think people shouldn't post all these things, and of course I read them and it doesn't bother me, but I guess because I'm pretty private, that even on an anonymous message board, I don't feel comfortable sharing the really intimate details of my life. I guess I'm just curious why people do share so much? I'm sure someone will take this the wrong way...dunno...and again I'm not saying people shouldn't get it all out if they need to. Just curious... *shrug*

I think it's easier 'cus you don't know anyone and yet you get attached to people online so they become people that can't really judge you in your everyday life but they can give you advice. It's as if you were talking to your best friend and the next day she/he doesn't remember what you told her/him.

[meauxna 15]

having said that I do agree with the whole false sense of security of the internet.....I once googled welshcookie and almost fell over lol

yeah yeah, that's all fine and well. But the *real* question is: What became of CaptCaveman???

[Hilarious Clinton 452]

Maybe because of a few recent really detailed threads, I sit here and am truly amazed at how much people share about their private lives....everything from troubles in the marriage, family problems, health issues, financial woes, etc.... It's not that I think people shouldn't post all these things, and of course I read them and it doesn't bother me, but I guess because I'm pretty private, that even on an anonymous message board, I don't feel comfortable sharing the really intimate details of my life. I guess I'm just curious why people do share so much? I'm sure someone will take this the wrong way...dunno...and again I'm not saying people shouldn't get it all out if they need to. Just curious... *shrug*

I think there is a voyeuristic element to it. Some people like to expose themselves in front of a window or webcam. Others on a message board. The good news is that I don't believe there are any stalkers on our board.

[sarah and hicham 3]

Maybe because of a few recent really detailed threads, I sit here and am truly amazed at how much people share about their private lives....everything from troubles in the marriage, family problems, health issues, financial woes, etc.... It's not that I think people shouldn't post all these things, and of course I read them and it doesn't bother me, but I guess because I'm pretty private, that even on an anonymous message board, I don't feel comfortable sharing the really intimate details of my life. I guess I'm just curious why people do share so much? I'm sure someone will take this the wrong way...dunno...and again I'm not saying people shouldn't get it all out if they need to. Just curious... *shrug*

I think there is a voyeuristic element to it. Some people like to expose themselves in front of a window or webcam. Others on a message board. The good news is that I don't believe there are any stalkers on our board.

I think I disagree with that. I believe there is a "stalker" type on here so watch out!

[almaty 19]

Maybe because of a few recent really detailed threads, I sit here and am truly amazed at how much people share about their private lives....everything from troubles in the marriage, family problems, health issues, financial woes, etc.... It's not that I think people shouldn't post all these things, and of course I read them and it doesn't bother me, but I guess because I'm pretty private, that even on an anonymous message board, I don't feel comfortable sharing the really intimate details of my life. I guess I'm just curious why people do share so much? I'm sure someone will take this the wrong way...dunno...and again I'm not saying people shouldn't get it all out if they need to. Just curious... *shrug*

I think there is a voyeuristic element to it. Some people like to expose themselves in front of a window or webcam. Others on a message board. The good news is that I don't believe there are any stalkers on our board.

I think I disagree with that. I believe there is a "stalker" type on here so watch out!

yeap..i am with you

[*Robert* 2]

i would be very surprised if there WEREN'T stalker types here!

[almaty 19]

it would be a rare public open forum that does not have a few ...we have had trouble in the past..

[MichelleandCraig 1]

Well, I know as far as it goes about "that one thread" ...for me, it was just a really good place to vent where I knew people would really understand. I spoke to my 3 closest personal friends about it as well, one in particular, but even then not in quite as much detail as I did on here. I didn't even want advice...and I got it, and that's fine...I realize now that people WILL do that when you post, whether you ask for it or not. Personally, I didn't feel that people that haven't gone through this process could ever really understand all it entails. It's fine and dandy for friends,family,etc. IRL to say "well he should be over it by now" or some other offhand remark, but some of you who have had difficulty adjusting(tho many don't have a tough time at all) could really relate. Sometimes it's just really nice to "talk" to people who can fully understand, and may have suggestions that helped them to overcome the same problem. Not something you can get from someone who's never done it. M.

Also, wanted to add: for those of you who said you don't share, not just because you're not like that, but because your spouse didn't like it...in your situation that is DEF. the right thing to do then. For us, before I said *anything* too personal, I asked Craig if he minded...he never did since it was an online forum. I didn't share such personal details with my/our friends that we would later have to look in the eye...

[CarolineM 0]

I like all of ya'll...but if I have a really personal issue I'd tell my best friends!! then I'd have advice that personalized for me by people who know me well but if people need confirmation/advice from anonymous "Strangers" than I say that's fine!!1 Sometimes that can be really helpful !