C-Section or Not

[mnieto 2]

I just came over to the US several weeks ago and I'm 32 weeks pregnant now. My first OBGYN appointment here in the US will be on 07/14. I have heard all kinds of horror stories that the doctors here try to talk you into a C-section etc. I hope that this isn't true as I wouldn't like to have a C-section as long as it's not absolutely necessary. Sure, if there should be any complications, go ahead and do whatever is necessary. But as long as everything is half - way ok, I'd much rather give birth naturally.

Here's a stupid question, they can't "force" me to do a C-section, as long as there are no major complications, right?

[Chrissy25 0]

these days the scars are not huge at all

i agree. My scar you can hardly tell is there....i must be one of the lucky ones... i healed quite quickly. Plus when i have my next child it will be c-section again as our hospital will only do another c-section if you had one previously. To be honest, thats fine with me

[doodlebugg 10]

I was in labor for about 28 hours with my first. At one point I was 9 cm dialated and then poof I was back to 6cm. I have no idea how that's even possible but after 28 hours and due to the fact that I had toxemia they decided to do a csection. She was 8 lb, 3 oz.

My second should have been a normal delivery but my doctor was all, you can't do a vaginal after a c-section. Looking back I should have pushed it (no pun intended ) because she was 5 lb, 1 oz and had (and still has) a teensy weensy head.

I don't think I have a choice if I were to get pregnant again. I think pretty much after 2 sections a vbac is pretty dangerous.

Had I to choose I would have had both naturally but seriously I had no help whatsoever in terms of coaching since my ex basically dropped me off at the hospital and left me there alone to deliver both girls. I think if I had a coach that helped me get through it I might have even fought the first section.

[*julez* 124]

I would only have a C Section if it were medically necessary. I had 3 kids, all natural child births and I don't think it was a bad at all.

[Amby 490]

my opinion is just not to have kids then you don't have to think about that

[mnieto 2]

my ex basically dropped me off at the hospital and left me there alone to deliver both girls.

Jeez, some guys should really have their a$$es kicked all day long 24/7 ....

[Eveline 9]

I just came over to the US several weeks ago and I'm 32 weeks pregnant now. My first OBGYN appointment here in the US will be on 07/14. I have heard all kinds of horror stories that the doctors here try to talk you into a C-section etc. I hope that this isn't true as I wouldn't like to have a C-section as long as it's not absolutely necessary. Sure, if there should be any complications, go ahead and do whatever is necessary. But as long as everything is half - way ok, I'd much rather give birth naturally.

Here's a stupid question, they can't "force" me to do a C-section, as long as there are no major complications, right?

\

No, they cant. They cannot do it when the doc wants to go home for dinner or if there's the playoffs on TV or anything. You will have to sign a consent form and as long as they don't have your signature, they can't do anything. BUT, I have heard of hospitals handing out court orders when the mother refuses to sign the consent form for a repeat or when the baby is in major trouble but at that point I think most mother's will agree to a c/s. If this is your first child and if both you and baby are in good health and baby tolerates labor well then there's nothing they can do to pressure you into a c/s. The only thing that might happen is, if you don't have enough support (husband, family, DOULA) you might just 'give up' after long labor. After having the urge to push for 6 hours and the pain with it, I just didn't want to do it no more and agreed to the c/s.

my ex basically dropped me off at the hospital and left me there alone to deliver both girls.

Jeez, some guys should really have their a$$es kicked all day long 24/7 ....

My doula told me she went to a hospital birth once and the father there stuffed toilet paper in his ears so he wouldn't hear his wife scream as loud...He thought he was being funny.

[Dr. Obvious 49]

BONDING is a lifelong process. Sure, there are hormones send you by your body during labor which make you fly high after birth but that doesn't mean that you have a superdooper relationship with your child. I didn't care for my son in the beginning. I didn't want to see him cause I was so exhausted and apparently "Wacken" kinda had the same experience, although she had a vaginal delivery. In the end, every mommy loves their child no matter how it came into this world.

Exactly. I hate all the guilt trips and mommy olympics.

Look, having a vaginal birth without pain medication did nothing to foster immediate bonding. Whatever benefit it may have had for the baby was cancelled by the fact that her bone was broken on the way out and her mother was insane. Broken bones, insane mother, but it was all worth it to have come out the vajayjay. Right...

I will say again, I would not choose a c-section, I do not begrudge the women who do. Because of my bad vaginal experience, I really can't feel like I can blame anyone too much anymore. The experience knocked me off my high horse because I used to have the same opinion some of you all do. I also know second hand that c-sections are not all flowers and roses. I don't think there is any 'best' way to get the baby out, except for alive, to be honest.

I don't see why anybody would choose a c-section to have a huge scar.

I got one anyway. It is a toss up really with vaginal birth.

Had I to choose I would have had both naturally but seriously I had no help whatsoever in terms of coaching since my ex basically dropped me off at the hospital and left me there alone to deliver both girls. I think if I had a coach that helped me get through it I might have even fought the first section.

Jerk.

That said, I can somewhat understand though if a man doesn't wish to care to see the woman he loves in horrific pain for hours on end while he can do nothing about it. It takes a lot out of you to watch as much as it does to perform. It was like when my sister was in the hospital getting tubes shoved down her nose into her stomach. That was extremely hard to watch. I wanted to walk out of the room a million times, punch the nurse in the face, but I forced myself to stay in the chair while she dealt with it poorly. Regardless of whatever logical thing your mind says, another part is screaming in protest. You want to protect those you love from pain and suffering regardless of the reason. It is a powerful instinct. I felt very bad for my husband. I know what he was forced to watch.

[doodlebugg 10]

oh no it wasn't a sqeamish thing. He was tired and it was about 9pm on a Wed night. With the second one he left me at home with an 11 month old and me in labor so he could get some peace and quiet at work since I was making a fuss.

there's a reason he's the "ex".

[Dr. Obvious 49]

oh no it wasn't a sqeamish thing. He was tired and it was about 9pm on a Wed night. With the second one he left me at home with an 11 month old and me in labor so he could get some peace and quiet at work since I was making a fuss.

there's a reason he's the "ex".

Probably the best decision of your life. What an #######.

My husband stayed up the whole night playing Counterstrike and decided at 5am he wanted to go to bed. Unfortuately, I was in labor, so we went to the hospital and by the time she was born, he had been up for nearly a complete 24 hours.

[Krikit 1,163]

oh no it wasn't a sqeamish thing. He was tired and it was about 9pm on a Wed night. With the second one he left me at home with an 11 month old and me in labor so he could get some peace and quiet at work since I was making a fuss.

Sounds like a real charmer.

[CBR 0]

I have not heard of any recent trend toward requesting c-sections on either the mother's part nor the doctors. I guess I've been out of the loop.

I've had a drug-free vaginal birth, an induced breech birth (stillborn-he had a heart defect), and a planned c-section due to placenta previa.

I can't think of any other variations on how a baby can come out. I would have to say that the induction/breech and the c-section rival in how painful they were. The contractions in an induced labor are MUCH stronger and come on like hitting a brick wall versus the gradual wave/buildup you feel during a natural birth. The c-section was the more painful immediately afterward, but I was able to care for my son on my own within a couple days (as slow as a sloth, but still could do it). The vaginal birth resulted in painful "relations" for a complete year afterward...I had stitches but from an incision which tore further.

I would never choose a c-section, but would also never judge another woman's choice to have one based on her past experiences. There's no question in my mind that if it's medically necessary it should be done. And there's no question in my mind that just choosing to do one for convenience (i want to make it to my sister's wedding blah blah blah #######) is wrong. The baby's best interests should be put first followed close second by the mom's.

And for the girl who just moved here already pregnant, NO, they can't force you into a c-section. And also don't believe everything people tell you. The US in general does NOT CHOOSE c-sections. There are pockets of selfish doctors and selfish mothers, but in general don't believe that hogwash that all the docs here do that.

[Dr. Obvious 49]

The contractions in an induced labor are MUCH stronger and come on like hitting a brick wall versus the gradual wave/buildup you feel during a natural birth.

Generally speaking that my be true. However, that was the central problem with my own natural, non-induced labor. It went from joking and having fun one contraction to a ride straight to hell the next. That was why I had no control of myself. It was absolutely unexpected. Like being hit with a freight train.

[CBR 0]

The contractions in an induced labor are MUCH stronger and come on like hitting a brick wall versus the gradual wave/buildup you feel during a natural birth.

Generally speaking that my be true. However, that was the central problem with my own natural, non-induced labor. It went from joking and having fun one contraction to a ride straight to hell the next. That was why I had no control of myself. It was absolutely unexpected. Like being hit with a freight train.

You're right, that was just my experience in comparison since I had experienced both ways. If you had that with a natural birth I'd hate to know what would happen if you did get Pitocin. You describe how the induction felt to me too...fine...fine...to... KILL ME NOW!!!!!!! I really cringed reading all your posts and am so sorry your experience was so horrific.

[anya-D 8]

Just curious,

Why is it that women who choose to have a c-section deemed selfish? What's wrong with having a c-section if the mother doesn’t want to have a tore ####### or want to have the baby out by specific time or might be afraid of a long labor? It is the mother body is it not? So what is the different of natural and c-section to the child if we take the mother out of the picture?

I don’t have any kid and don’t plan on having one (might change my mind but seems very unlikely) so this is just out of curiosity question.