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Filed: Timeline
I also think home visits are a way of checking that your husband/fiance does not have another wife and kids... especially its not formal marriage between them

Interesting point. I never thought of that one. I mean what if he did have another wife, or even three other wives? It's accepted in Egypt and legal but what would they do, even if the petitioner knew about it and was ok with it? (totally NOT my situation btw. lol. )

If the marriage is recognized in the U.S., then the beneficiary would be ineligible for a visa as polygyny is unlawful in the U.S.

Even if the first marriage (or second or third) wasn't in the US? I know I'm getting technical but this has always made me wonder...if the Egyptian had not married the previous wives at the Ministry of Justice then the marriage(s) are not recognized by the US, which would mean the polygamy factor wouldn't be a factor right? Maybe this is too legal for this board but it fascinates me. The way people who practice polygamy in the US get around it is by not registring the marriage and instead only having a mosque thing instead.

If the marriage isn't recognized in the U.S., then I don't see how having multiple wives (Islamically only) would make one ineligible for a visa. In fact, I'm sure it happens all the time - many times probably without the USC wife's knowledge.

That's why they require the certificate of celibacy or soemthing like that (can't remember the exact name) before the interview. It must state that they are not married to be eligible for the visa. The only way around it would be if he was married Islamically but not legally. From what I understand it is frowned upon to do it this way as it usually hurts the woman in the long run (there are islamic reasons too, but I can't quote them now or look them us since I'm at work) It does happen though.

That certificate of celibacy makes me laugh though. How can anyone really prove that? Yeah they can prove they are single, but that they are celibate?

Is this a K-1 thing? My husband didn't have to submit a certificate of celibacy at all.

its in all the former french colonies.. certificate celebetaire

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Filed: AOS (apr) Country: Egypt
Timeline
Maybe you can't understand the mentality because its a old fashioned set of thinking. Now days maybe they will accept but sometimes they are not happy. Sometimes they wanted that same typical wife to speak full arabic, not to have so much education, etc...I don't want to offend anyone but this is the true mentality if you ask any mother or father there. Sometimes you will come across one family who only cares for the sons or daughters happiness. I personally I would want my child to marry in Algeria.

I don't think this is limited to Algerian (or MENA) thinking. We've heard many a story right here of how American families sometimes have a hard time accepting the foreign spouse. It's always hoped that they come to love you as they get to know you and see how you treat their child.

One of our israeli friends (who was born in the US - israeli parents) is dating an american girl, shes perfectly nice and going through the conversion (to judaism) process. Orthodox conversion at that. His parents will not accept her and will not come to the wedding! (as of now) They are pissed because she isnt israeli or at least jewish from birth. I sure hope they come around.

My mother probably would be not accepting if I was a lesbian, or married another race. Its really sad. I will be happy with whoever my children marry (as long as they are good peeps)

Is it common to convert? I mean I know that girl from Sex in the City did it but don't you have to go through a lot to convince the community or the rabbi that you're sincere? I grew up and still live in a predominantly Jewish town and in high school the boys who were jewish would not date the girls who weren't because their families wouldn't accept it if it progressed to something serious. I was told it is because you can only be jewish if your mother is jewish. Is that true or did the boys just not really like me? lol

"Only from your heart can you touch the sky" - Rumi

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Filed: Timeline
Maybe you can't understand the mentality because its a old fashioned set of thinking. Now days maybe they will accept but sometimes they are not happy. Sometimes they wanted that same typical wife to speak full arabic, not to have so much education, etc...I don't want to offend anyone but this is the true mentality if you ask any mother or father there. Sometimes you will come across one family who only cares for the sons or daughters happiness. I personally I would want my child to marry in Algeria.

I don't think this is limited to Algerian (or MENA) thinking. We've heard many a story right here of how American families sometimes have a hard time accepting the foreign spouse. It's always hoped that they come to love you as they get to know you and see how you treat their child.

One of our israeli friends (who was born in the US - israeli parents) is dating an american girl, shes perfectly nice and going through the conversion (to judaism) process. Orthodox conversion at that. His parents will not accept her and will not come to the wedding! (as of now) They are pissed because she isnt israeli or at least jewish from birth. I sure hope they come around.

My mother probably would be not accepting if I was a lesbian, or married another race. Its really sad. I will be happy with whoever my children marry (as long as they are good peeps)

Is it common to convert? I mean I know that girl from Sex in the City did it but don't you have to go through a lot to convince the community or the rabbi that you're sincere? I grew up and still live in a predominantly Jewish town and in high school the boys who were jewish would not date the girls who weren't because their families wouldn't accept it if it progressed to something serious. I was told it is because you can only be jewish if your mother is jewish. Is that true or did the boys just not really like me? lol

Shiksa (Yiddish: שיקסע) or shikse, is a Yiddish word that has moved into English usage, mostly in North American Jewish culture, that is used as a pejorative or mock-pejorative term for a non-Jewish woman. Traditionally, the word shiksa is an ethnic slur used to refer to a non-Jewish woman to whom a Jewish man is attracted, or an attractive non-Jewish woman who is dating or married to a Jewish man.

The word shiksa is derived from the Hebrew term sheketz, which means "loathsome", "abomination", "unclean", "dirty", "rodent", or "lizard", depending on the translator.[1][2]

Despite its etymology, the term shiksa is widely used and accepted in the United States, where it is often used in a humorous way. Nevertheless, some consider the word highly offensive.

[edit] Pop cultural uses

In The Jazz Singer, Jakie's mother says, "Maybe he's fallen in love with a shiksa."

Comedian and social critic Lenny Bruce wrote a short story on the subject of shiksas.

The term figures prominently in Philip Roth's novel Portnoy's Complaint, a Jewish man's narrative about, among other things, his sexual exploits with several "shiksas".

In the Saturday Night Live sketch in which John Belushi portrays Vito Corleone in a therapy group, one of the other patients, a flight attendant played by Laraine Newman, says that while making a dessert, she overheard her boyfriend's mother say, "Look, the shiksa's making us a Presbyterian pie."

On Mork and Mindy, Mork (Robin Williams) often refers to Mindy (Pam Dawber) as a shiksa and in one episode ("Stark Raving Mork") he says her nose is "shiksa city".

In the 1980 remake of The Jazz Singer, Molly Bell (Lucie Arnaz) tells Jesse Robin (Neil Diamond), "I may be a shiksa, but I know the meaning of Yom Kippur".

An episode of Moonlighting is titled "Come Back Little Shiksa", referring to Maddie Hayes (portrayed by Cybill Shepherd).

In "The Serenity Now" episode of Seinfeld a number of Jewish characters show attraction towards Elaine. To explain this, George says that she has "shiksappeal" and that Jewish men like women who "don't remind them of their mothers".

In an episode of the The Nanny, Fran Fine describes Maggie, the eldest girl in her care, as a "shiksa goddess" to a Jewish boy she wants Maggie to date. In a later episode, when Fran tries to fake a heart attack, Maggie explains that "Jewish guilt" doesn't work on shiksas.

Dr. Julianna Cox, the chief medical examiner on Homicide: Life on the Street refers to herself to Detective John Munch as "no ordinary shiksa" following the examination of a dead Jewish victim.

In the Chicago Hope episode "Heartbreak", Camille (Roxanne Hart), who was raised Catholic, is speaking at the shivah of a rabbi friend. She says that "Rabbi Taubler married me and my husband. He used to joke that I was his first shiksa." Her remark is greeted with smirks from some of the congregation and head-shaking from others.

In an episode of Sex and the City, when Harry Goldenblatt tells his girlfriend, Charlotte York, that he must marry a Jew, he describes her as a "shiksa goddess". She eventually converts to Judaism.

In the "Disco Inferno" episode of Cold Case, Detective Lilly Rush, played by Kathryn Morris, is called a shiksa by one of the victims' mothers.

In the song "Pretty Fly For a Rabbi", Weird Al Yankovic remarks of the temple's new rabbi, "Even shiksas think he's swell".

Shiksas are mentioned in "You Won't Succeed on Broadway", a song from the musical Spamalot, with the line, "You may even have some shiksas making stews!"

In "A Proportional Response", an episode of The West Wing, during an argument Josh calls C. J. a "paranoid Berkeley shiksa feminista".

In an episode of ####### As Folk, Melanie Marcus describes her non-Jewish partner, Lindsay Peterson, as a "shiksa goddess" after Lindsay has been unfaithful.

In an episode of The Suite Life of Zack and Cody, London (Brenda Song) tells Maddie (Ashley Tisdale) that she celebrates Hanukkah even though she's not Jewish. Her explanation: "Miss out on eight days of presents? Not this shiksa." (Ironically, Maddie, an Irish-Catholic character, is played by a Jewish actress.)

Jason Robert Brown's musical The Last Five Years features a song titled "Shiksa Goddess" that explores the main character Jamie's desire for a non-Jewish woman.

In the parody film Date Movie, Roz refers to Julia, her son's non-Jewish fiancée, as a "mushuggener goyim shiksa".

On their recent cd, In Defense of the Genre, Say Anything have a song entitled "Shiksa (Girlfriend)".

In an episode of House M.D. (4x06) one of the new trial team members states that "shiksas are for practice

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Filed: Timeline

It could be. I have a Jewish male friend who will "mess" around with non Jewish girls but if he's wanting something serious/someone to bring home to mama he dates Jewish girls. He's not even really all that religious.

Maybe you can't understand the mentality because its a old fashioned set of thinking. Now days maybe they will accept but sometimes they are not happy. Sometimes they wanted that same typical wife to speak full arabic, not to have so much education, etc...I don't want to offend anyone but this is the true mentality if you ask any mother or father there. Sometimes you will come across one family who only cares for the sons or daughters happiness. I personally I would want my child to marry in Algeria.

I don't think this is limited to Algerian (or MENA) thinking. We've heard many a story right here of how American families sometimes have a hard time accepting the foreign spouse. It's always hoped that they come to love you as they get to know you and see how you treat their child.

One of our israeli friends (who was born in the US - israeli parents) is dating an american girl, shes perfectly nice and going through the conversion (to judaism) process. Orthodox conversion at that. His parents will not accept her and will not come to the wedding! (as of now) They are pissed because she isnt israeli or at least jewish from birth. I sure hope they come around.

My mother probably would be not accepting if I was a lesbian, or married another race. Its really sad. I will be happy with whoever my children marry (as long as they are good peeps)

Is it common to convert? I mean I know that girl from Sex in the City did it but don't you have to go through a lot to convince the community or the rabbi that you're sincere? I grew up and still live in a predominantly Jewish town and in high school the boys who were jewish would not date the girls who weren't because their families wouldn't accept it if it progressed to something serious. I was told it is because you can only be jewish if your mother is jewish. Is that true or did the boys just not really like me? lol

Edited by moody
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Filed: Citizen (pnd) Country: Morocco
Timeline
I agree.

Yes, Egypt is like Morocco in that way. You can't even pass gas without the neighbors knowing about it there. Really invasive society. Personally, that would drive me insane.

I think they're seeing if someone is going to slip up and give some sort of indication that the marriage is only for papers. I don't know if Egypt is like Morocco in this way, but it seems like neighbors know each other's business much more so than here.

OMG...... :yes:

This is soooo true! My husband is amazed at how no one here really cares about stupid things like they do there. I think it is because there is no work giving each other too much time to "entertain" themselves with other peoples lives. What a freaking waste of time.

how very, very false, and ethnocentric.

Ethnocentric? Funny how I said it is my husband, the Moroccan, that said this. Perhaps he is prejudice about himself. Strange that he proudly tells everyone he is from Morocco. Not to mention that I stated that it is because there is no work. I would think that suggests a persons situation not culture. We live in an area that has a very low unemployment rate, therefore no time to meddle.

'Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways - Chardonnay in one hand - chocolate in the other - body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming 'WOO HOO, What a Ride'

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Filed: Timeline
I agree.

Yes, Egypt is like Morocco in that way. You can't even pass gas without the neighbors knowing about it there. Really invasive society. Personally, that would drive me insane.

I think they're seeing if someone is going to slip up and give some sort of indication that the marriage is only for papers. I don't know if Egypt is like Morocco in this way, but it seems like neighbors know each other's business much more so than here.

OMG...... :yes:

This is soooo true! My husband is amazed at how no one here really cares about stupid things like they do there. I think it is because there is no work giving each other too much time to "entertain" themselves with other peoples lives. What a freaking waste of time.

how very, very false, and ethnocentric.

Ethnocentric? Funny how I said it is my husband, the Moroccan, that said this. Perhaps he is prejudice about himself. Strange that he proudly tells everyone he is from Morocco. Not to mention that I stated that it is because there is no work. I would think that suggests a persons situation not culture. We live in an area that has a very low unemployment rate, therefore no time to meddle.

umm......sometimes gossipy people talk good about you and help your case lol llol lol
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I agree.

Yes, Egypt is like Morocco in that way. You can't even pass gas without the neighbors knowing about it there. Really invasive society. Personally, that would drive me insane.

I think they're seeing if someone is going to slip up and give some sort of indication that the marriage is only for papers. I don't know if Egypt is like Morocco in this way, but it seems like neighbors know each other's business much more so than here.

OMG...... :yes:

This is soooo true! My husband is amazed at how no one here really cares about stupid things like they do there. I think it is because there is no work giving each other too much time to "entertain" themselves with other peoples lives. What a freaking waste of time.

how very, very false, and ethnocentric.

Ethnocentric? Funny how I said it is my husband, the Moroccan, that said this. Perhaps he is prejudice about himself. Strange that he proudly tells everyone he is from Morocco. Not to mention that I stated that it is because there is no work. I would think that suggests a persons situation not culture. We live in an area that has a very low unemployment rate, therefore no time to meddle.

Well I agree with you , gossiping is the #1 sport in many MENA countries.

VJ Hours - I am available M-F from 10am - 5pm PST. I will occasionaly put in some OT for a fairly good poo slinging thread or a donut.

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Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Brazil
Timeline
I agree.

Yes, Egypt is like Morocco in that way. You can't even pass gas without the neighbors knowing about it there. Really invasive society. Personally, that would drive me insane.

I think they're seeing if someone is going to slip up and give some sort of indication that the marriage is only for papers. I don't know if Egypt is like Morocco in this way, but it seems like neighbors know each other's business much more so than here.

OMG...... :yes:

This is soooo true! My husband is amazed at how no one here really cares about stupid things like they do there. I think it is because there is no work giving each other too much time to "entertain" themselves with other peoples lives. What a freaking waste of time.

how very, very false, and ethnocentric.

Ethnocentric? Funny how I said it is my husband, the Moroccan, that said this. Perhaps he is prejudice about himself. Strange that he proudly tells everyone he is from Morocco. Not to mention that I stated that it is because there is no work. I would think that suggests a persons situation not culture. We live in an area that has a very low unemployment rate, therefore no time to meddle.

Well I agree with you , gossiping is the #1 sport in many MENA countries.

what stereotyping! :ranting:

:P

* ~ * Charles * ~ *
 

I carry a gun because a cop is too heavy.

 

USE THE REPORT BUTTON INSTEAD OF MESSAGING A MODERATOR!

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Filed: Citizen (pnd) Country: Morocco
Timeline
I agree.

Yes, Egypt is like Morocco in that way. You can't even pass gas without the neighbors knowing about it there. Really invasive society. Personally, that would drive me insane.

I think they're seeing if someone is going to slip up and give some sort of indication that the marriage is only for papers. I don't know if Egypt is like Morocco in this way, but it seems like neighbors know each other's business much more so than here.

OMG...... :yes:

This is soooo true! My husband is amazed at how no one here really cares about stupid things like they do there. I think it is because there is no work giving each other too much time to "entertain" themselves with other peoples lives. What a freaking waste of time.

how very, very false, and ethnocentric.

Ethnocentric? Funny how I said it is my husband, the Moroccan, that said this. Perhaps he is prejudice about himself. Strange that he proudly tells everyone he is from Morocco. Not to mention that I stated that it is because there is no work. I would think that suggests a persons situation not culture. We live in an area that has a very low unemployment rate, therefore no time to meddle.

Well I agree with you , gossiping is the #1 sport in many MENA countries.

what stereotyping! :ranting:

:P

Similar to the notion that men named Charles are smart A$$e$.... :whistle:

'Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways - Chardonnay in one hand - chocolate in the other - body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming 'WOO HOO, What a Ride'

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Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Brazil
Timeline
I agree.

Yes, Egypt is like Morocco in that way. You can't even pass gas without the neighbors knowing about it there. Really invasive society. Personally, that would drive me insane.

I think they're seeing if someone is going to slip up and give some sort of indication that the marriage is only for papers. I don't know if Egypt is like Morocco in this way, but it seems like neighbors know each other's business much more so than here.

OMG...... :yes:

This is soooo true! My husband is amazed at how no one here really cares about stupid things like they do there. I think it is because there is no work giving each other too much time to "entertain" themselves with other peoples lives. What a freaking waste of time.

how very, very false, and ethnocentric.

Ethnocentric? Funny how I said it is my husband, the Moroccan, that said this. Perhaps he is prejudice about himself. Strange that he proudly tells everyone he is from Morocco. Not to mention that I stated that it is because there is no work. I would think that suggests a persons situation not culture. We live in an area that has a very low unemployment rate, therefore no time to meddle.

Well I agree with you , gossiping is the #1 sport in many MENA countries.

what stereotyping! :ranting:

:P

Similar to the notion that men named Charles are smart A$$e$.... :whistle:

:o no way! :P

* ~ * Charles * ~ *
 

I carry a gun because a cop is too heavy.

 

USE THE REPORT BUTTON INSTEAD OF MESSAGING A MODERATOR!

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I agree.

Yes, Egypt is like Morocco in that way. You can't even pass gas without the neighbors knowing about it there. Really invasive society. Personally, that would drive me insane.

I think they're seeing if someone is going to slip up and give some sort of indication that the marriage is only for papers. I don't know if Egypt is like Morocco in this way, but it seems like neighbors know each other's business much more so than here.

OMG...... :yes:

This is soooo true! My husband is amazed at how no one here really cares about stupid things like they do there. I think it is because there is no work giving each other too much time to "entertain" themselves with other peoples lives. What a freaking waste of time.

how very, very false, and ethnocentric.

Ethnocentric? Funny how I said it is my husband, the Moroccan, that said this. Perhaps he is prejudice about himself. Strange that he proudly tells everyone he is from Morocco. Not to mention that I stated that it is because there is no work. I would think that suggests a persons situation not culture. We live in an area that has a very low unemployment rate, therefore no time to meddle.

Well I agree with you , gossiping is the #1 sport in many MENA countries.

what stereotyping! :ranting:

:P

Actually its more of a reality there because of the way the family unit is structured. There is no such thing as "this is my life and I'll do what I want", no secrets. Everything is out in the open therefore people will naturally talk about it. I think this is the one thing that got on my nerves the most when I was there.

VJ Hours - I am available M-F from 10am - 5pm PST. I will occasionaly put in some OT for a fairly good poo slinging thread or a donut.

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Filed: Citizen (pnd) Country: Morocco
Timeline

Things there are very different than here. For instance, my husband asked me how much money so and so makes. I told him I don't know, it isn't right to ask a person that question. He was amazed. He said that they ask that question all of the time there. I am sure this is just the tip of the iceberg but I am still learning.

One other note, I know a butt load of Iraqi men where I live. I have known then for 10 years now. They may be here, but they are all the same. They are constantly gossiping about each other, and their wives, girlfriends, etc. My ex knew places I was going a year after we broke up. It seems his friends had seen me and didn't waste a minute to call him on the phone to report in. Not only that, he told me himself when we were still together that this is what would happen.

Lets just say I stay away from any place that I think they might be.

'Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways - Chardonnay in one hand - chocolate in the other - body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming 'WOO HOO, What a Ride'

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Filed: AOS (apr) Country: Egypt
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I know I've told this before but we stayed at a different flat than the one he lives in when I first went there. The reason for this was to avoid the gossip since it is very unusual for a foreign woman out of no where (to them) to be shacking up with one from that neighborhood. His neighbors know if he gets mail before he does. They are the kings and queens of gossip and he and his sisters HATE that about their neighborhood.

Anyhoo....when I was there the first time we did go to his flat when his sisters were not there. Within about two seconds of our closing the door there was a loud pounding. He let them pound away until I couldn't take it anymore and when he finally opened the door there were about 15 or so people outside the door and one woman pushed her way past him and started SCREAMING at me in arabic. She was about in her mid 60's I would say with a housecoat and a head thing on (not a hijab type scarf but the thing they wear around the house that ties at the top in front) and thick thick black khol under her eyes.

i started crying, he yelled and after a while of them going back and forth (I guess the police were going to be coming next) his sisters finally came over and kicked everyone but this woman out. They went back and forth and back and forth and then the tears came. Hugs all around (except for me :crying: ) and then came the MABROOOK, MABROOOK, MASHALLAH MABROOK!!! Then she did hug me and stared at me with tears and smiles. lol

I tell this because SHE is the one the consular person talked to the most. lol. She is the one who said of course he is married to a foreign one, etc. :D So sometimes the gossiping just might help. :)

"Only from your heart can you touch the sky" - Rumi

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Filed: Other Country: Israel
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Maybe you can't understand the mentality because its a old fashioned set of thinking. Now days maybe they will accept but sometimes they are not happy. Sometimes they wanted that same typical wife to speak full arabic, not to have so much education, etc...I don't want to offend anyone but this is the true mentality if you ask any mother or father there. Sometimes you will come across one family who only cares for the sons or daughters happiness. I personally I would want my child to marry in Algeria.

I don't think this is limited to Algerian (or MENA) thinking. We've heard many a story right here of how American families sometimes have a hard time accepting the foreign spouse. It's always hoped that they come to love you as they get to know you and see how you treat their child.

One of our israeli friends (who was born in the US - israeli parents) is dating an american girl, shes perfectly nice and going through the conversion (to judaism) process. Orthodox conversion at that. His parents will not accept her and will not come to the wedding! (as of now) They are pissed because she isnt israeli or at least jewish from birth. I sure hope they come around.

My mother probably would be not accepting if I was a lesbian, or married another race. Its really sad. I will be happy with whoever my children marry (as long as they are good peeps)

Is it common to convert? I mean I know that girl from Sex in the City did it but don't you have to go through a lot to convince the community or the rabbi that you're sincere? I grew up and still live in a predominantly Jewish town and in high school the boys who were jewish would not date the girls who weren't because their families wouldn't accept it if it progressed to something serious. I was told it is because you can only be jewish if your mother is jewish. Is that true or did the boys just not really like me? lol

most people marrying israelis convert. i would go out on a limb to say that close to all people marrying practicing orthodox or conservative jews convert. some people marrying reform jews convert and some remain "interfaith". orthodox and conservative do not accept interfaith hence the conversions. israelis tend to follow orthodox/traditional views. of course there are those who are israeli or grew up orthodox or conservative but are now completely not religious at all and will remain interfaith (or no faith). it is tradition for the rabbi to reject you three times to test your sincerity and many rabbis dont deal with conversions (so they might just be rejecting you period). your children are only jewish if the mother is jewish either through birth or conversion. i think its the same in islam but with the father? can a muslim woman marry a non muslim man who converts and have muslim kids?

Things there are very different than here. For instance, my husband asked me how much money so and so makes. I told him I don't know, it isn't right to ask a person that question. He was amazed. He said that they ask that question all of the time there. I am sure this is just the tip of the iceberg but I am still learning.

One other note, I know a butt load of Iraqi men where I live. I have known then for 10 years now. They may be here, but they are all the same. They are constantly gossiping about each other, and their wives, girlfriends, etc. My ex knew places I was going a year after we broke up. It seems his friends had seen me and didn't waste a minute to call him on the phone to report in. Not only that, he told me himself when we were still together that this is what would happen.

Lets just say I stay away from any place that I think they might be.

israelis always ask how much you make and how much you paid for things. i am very secretive on stuff like that and it annoys the heck out of me. i always say "alot" or "not too much" then of course unless they are really obnoxious they dont want to keep pushing the question.

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Filed: AOS (apr) Country: Egypt
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Maybe you can't understand the mentality because its a old fashioned set of thinking. Now days maybe they will accept but sometimes they are not happy. Sometimes they wanted that same typical wife to speak full arabic, not to have so much education, etc...I don't want to offend anyone but this is the true mentality if you ask any mother or father there. Sometimes you will come across one family who only cares for the sons or daughters happiness. I personally I would want my child to marry in Algeria.

I don't think this is limited to Algerian (or MENA) thinking. We've heard many a story right here of how American families sometimes have a hard time accepting the foreign spouse. It's always hoped that they come to love you as they get to know you and see how you treat their child.

One of our israeli friends (who was born in the US - israeli parents) is dating an american girl, shes perfectly nice and going through the conversion (to judaism) process. Orthodox conversion at that. His parents will not accept her and will not come to the wedding! (as of now) They are pissed because she isnt israeli or at least jewish from birth. I sure hope they come around.

My mother probably would be not accepting if I was a lesbian, or married another race. Its really sad. I will be happy with whoever my children marry (as long as they are good peeps)

Is it common to convert? I mean I know that girl from Sex in the City did it but don't you have to go through a lot to convince the community or the rabbi that you're sincere? I grew up and still live in a predominantly Jewish town and in high school the boys who were jewish would not date the girls who weren't because their families wouldn't accept it if it progressed to something serious. I was told it is because you can only be jewish if your mother is jewish. Is that true or did the boys just not really like me? lol

most people marrying israelis convert. i would go out on a limb to say that close to all people marrying practicing orthodox or conservative jews convert. some people marrying reform jews convert and some remain "interfaith". orthodox and conservative do not accept interfaith hence the conversions. israelis tend to follow orthodox/traditional views. of course there are those who are israeli or grew up orthodox or conservative but are now completely not religious at all and will remain interfaith (or no faith). it is tradition for the rabbi to reject you three times to test your sincerity and many rabbis dont deal with conversions (so they might just be rejecting you period). your children are only jewish if the mother is jewish either through birth or conversion. i think its the same in islam but with the father? can a muslim woman marry a non muslim man who converts and have muslim kids?

Oh ok it must be the rejecting 3 times that is the hard part. The muslim woman marrying the converted muslim man question is up for grabs because it will spark a whole muslim women can marry non-muslim men thing. lol. But yes converted is converted so the children would be muslim.

Things there are very different than here. For instance, my husband asked me how much money so and so makes. I told him I don't know, it isn't right to ask a person that question. He was amazed. He said that they ask that question all of the time there. I am sure this is just the tip of the iceberg but I am still learning.

One other note, I know a butt load of Iraqi men where I live. I have known then for 10 years now. They may be here, but they are all the same. They are constantly gossiping about each other, and their wives, girlfriends, etc. My ex knew places I was going a year after we broke up. It seems his friends had seen me and didn't waste a minute to call him on the phone to report in. Not only that, he told me himself when we were still together that this is what would happen.

Lets just say I stay away from any place that I think they might be.

israelis always ask how much you make and how much you paid for things. i am very secretive on stuff like that and it annoys the heck out of me. i always say "alot" or "not too much" then of course unless they are really obnoxious they dont want to keep pushing the question.

And then there's the opposites like my oldest sister who tells EVERYONE what she paid for EVERYTHING she wears. REading that it would seem that she's arrogant but she shops at second hand stores almost exclusively so it's more like, "oh I love that coat!" and before you can finish your sentence she's all "it only cost me 50 cents!!!". :wacko:

"Only from your heart can you touch the sky" - Rumi

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