westcoastwoman

When I go back to England, I go in Morrison's and I see egg custards and cheshire cheese and pork pies and bacon made from meat not fat ! I see currant teacakes and cockles and mussels for 99 pence ! and fish for NOTHING compared to US prices. Icelandic haddock, not funny coloured pond goldfish... and on and on... they don't even sell whole chickens in this town.
I try and stick with porridge and shredded wheat and chicken breast rather than American food which is calorie central. I live a mile from a Walmart so maintaining my sylph like European shape is very important as the proof of the alternative is plain to see.
One tip to the arriver - you will notice that Americans are VERY polite and of course GUSHING. If you don't gush back you are a snotty aloof Brit and not polite - so be warned and lay it on thick. It makes me queesy to do it but it pays. When in Rome, sell your culture short.

Chicken tikka masala is the most popular dish in England - and has been for many years
Patel is the 3rd most common surname in the London phone book.
The Americans who live in the sticks have no idea what they are missing

Been here full time almost 3 years now
Lived in Wisconsin, Florida and now Washington State
This place has a really nice climate - 300 days blue skies and 8 inches rain pa
15% humidity so it feels really nice at 90 degrees. I used to almost pass out at 70 degrees in England as I can't take humidity
No tornados, no hurricanes and well back from the coast so no earthquakes so far.
The homesickness comes in bouts and can re-appear at any time. Many 'returners' forums have people who have been abroad for 10 years or more
The big test is your first BIG argument with your spouse or being fired etc. It's natural then to want to run for the familiar. The next morning, the sun is shining and it's ok again.
American food loses it's novelty and becomes dire
I go back to the UK every 3 months as I am retired. That kills the home sickness and I can get some decent English food (Karahi Gosht)
Religion is not my cup of tea so it's a problem for me - but you are a christian so you have really struck gold here and it will be superb to be away from the likes of me
Welcome and take it slowly and you will be fine. Don't get to thinking it's too good or you will have a correction at some stage.
I try and take the good from both countries and avoid the bad. It's greedy to have the best from two continents but it's the way to go
I used to think I was English but now, with the perspective from here, I realise I am British.

I've had back problems in the past, and was perscribed Soma (carisoprodol). They did help with the pain, but they do really kick your #######. I have had poor experiences with chiropractors, so I refuse to deal with them anymore.

fantastic post about "your" perfect man being just that regardless of ethnic background, nice to see that, i get quite tired of hearing how "insert ethnic background here" is better than this because the culture dictates this or that. never a better reason to get together than, you have similar interests and values. continued happiness to you!

It does sound like she is using you, sorry to say. That being said, you cannot send her back unless she agrees- she can remove conditions from her greencard herself if she can show a bonafide marriage, and yes, you will still be on the hook for financial sponsorship. I suggest a divorce asap, that is the best you can do to distance yourself.

Um...you can't "send her back." She is not a thing that you can discard.
If you guys divorce, she can petition for a 10 year card WITHOUT you, although you will still be on the hook for her financially unless she meets one of the terms (10 quarters of work, US citizen, dies, etc).
Sorry for your troubles.

Does this also include people from China?

Unlike a used car, people do not come with a money-back guarantee. It's therefore wise to establish whether or not a couple is compatible before getting engaged and filing for a fiance visa.
I feel sorry for that woman who just gave up everything at her home country to travel thousands of miles to a foreign continent to marry the love of her life, only to find out she's not as good as your petitioning husband bargained for.

The financial side is also worth watching. I know the regs are different everywhere but when my parents started fading I got them to sign their house over to me.
My dad died and my mother was taken into a nursing home.
They called me and said they wanted the house deeds as they were going to sell it. I told them it was mine so they couldn't. They asked me how long and I said 6 years. They backed off.
Not many people get round to these details and the govt take the house money and buy a nuclear submarine with it
In Scotland this is not an issue as the govt do not come for the house - they are too busy letting mass murderers out of prison
Anyway, the money side often needs attention and remember that tax avoidance is legal and tax evasion is not

Like others have said, you need to have a rock solid DNR that delineates exactly her wishes. You (or her) need to make her wishes crystal clear to all family members and regularly update the DNR to show that it is current. I'm just thinking in worst case scenarios, but I know someone who had to go to court to defend a DNR. All it takes is one relative to say "oh no, she said to me 3 months ago that she didn't want that anymore, but was too intimidated to update her living will to reflect that". It's a tough decision, and a difficult position to be put in. I'm sure your mother has complete confidence in your ability to make tough decisions and to respect her wishes.

Not exactly.
My mom is a very feisty 84 and still goes to church walking on 2 feet and even cuts the hedges on the property.
However she is increasingly fearful, paranoid and worried about anything/everything even while my wife
takes care of her better than a natural child. We live in the same house & care for her while my brother
has the power of attorney. He lives an hour away but does visit from time to time.
I love and trust my brother but I kind of wish that it was me as the brunt of the responsibility
for taking care of her will fall to me & my wife. I expect her to live to be 100.
I think you are as qualified to care for her as any of your siblings. There is no university degree in
caring for your family, you just do it.

Tex, I know your story is pure satire, but, you are on VJ in the middle of the day? I guess the bass ain't biting, so says the solunar table. The moon is in its first quarter phase, prompting the largemouths to fast, but there should be other species that are ready to swallow your lure!

This shouldn't be a problem, just buy a new one. Remember, there are money trees growing in almost everyone's back yard in America!

It sounds like the new ride share guy will own the boat pretty soon anyway so I would not worry about it!!! :rofl:

For those of you who are advising her to "call 911", please do not give out this advice in THIS situation.
911 is an EMERGENCY number for IMMEDIATE danger. As bad as this situation is for our original poster, this is NOT an IMMEDIATE DANGER situation because she has already LEFT the abuse.
To the original poster:
Go to your local police department and file a police report. Ask them what steps you should take from there, as they have contacts with local shelters and organizations who can help you.

Does not sound like it at all.
To be cautioned you would have to have been told he (or she) was cautioning you and more importantly you must have given informed consent to be cautioned.
In legal terms I believe you were given a bollocking.

been there. personally i was never able to get over the paranoia that he was going to do it again and it just created a miserable life for me. now, i can look back and see that our divorce was the absolute best thing. but everyone is different... Good luck in whatever you do!

I saw this today . . . and it just seemed so appropriate to post here:
Signboard outside a prostitute's house:
Married MEN not allowed. We serve the needy, not the greedy...

Perhaps you should make a poll: How many men have on VJ paid for sex in cash, gifts, or favors and how may women have exchanged such things for sex. Make it anonymous, and you might get some honest answers. Do the reverse as well if you want for the women.
There are a lot of old, fat, ugly USC's here with young tasty foreign morsels in tow.

I make no judgement on why women turn to prostitution.
I blame the men who exploit them.