Naijabound

LOL..yes indeed it did get my attention lol! I had read your first post when I joined VJ (last year) and I was like oh man I wonder what happen with that couple...it was like a story waiting to unfold lol...so I was very anxious to see your update...and well I must say wow! LOL...and well it is so clear you 2 are completely in love lol...differences at all... I agree with your hubby hang in there..especially if he wants to keep working at it (most men do throw in the towel easily, especially here in America my ex did)....so keep on fighting for your marriage girl (you know you love that man lol)...congrats on the house...I'm sure you are just as excited as he is too LOL...I can't wait until I get mine (well ours after we get married)...owning is better than renting...I think you both are going to look a back at all of this (as you are now) even further down the road and say wow....look how far we have come...my grandparents got (and still get) on one another's everlasting nerve but it's been 52 years now lol...older folks truly new what it meant "for better and for worse"....I like to say that today we have microwaveable marriages...quickly in quickly out...back in the day...granny and them (lol)...had homemade marriages...(a long time to cook; but the best dang meal you had lol)...blessings to you and your hubby!

To anyone interested. I developed a facebook group called "Americans loving their Nigerian spouses" the group description is as follows:
Unfortunately we hear too often about marriages between Americans and Nigerians where the American who got married to a Nigerian later finds out that he or she has been scammed by the Nigerian spouse for the purpose of immigrating to the United States. This fact has caused many Americans to become suspicious of all Nigerians and has painted a negative picture of our Nigerian brothers and sisters. I am developing this group to support those who are in legitimate marriages, a place where we can support one another, share our love stories, and validate that it is wrong to judge a whole race of people based on what a few bad apples have done. Our stories are worth being told and we deserve the same amount of respect that other intercultural marriages receive. I love my husband with all of my heart and I know, without a doubt, that my husband (An Igbo Man) loves me with all of his heart. Let’s stand together and support one another through this process of loving our Nigerian spouse in spite of the negative reactions that the world throws at us.
We are not interested in any hate stories but are looking for support for those who are in loving marriages. Please join us!

Have not been on VJ for a very long time but just wanted to stop in and say Hi! My Husband and I met on the computer back in 2004 traveled to nigeria in 2006, Married him 4 days after landing in Lagos.....went through the visa journey just like everyone here......was a month shy of being 2 years seperated from my husband before he got here in march of 2008....just so information is clear I am 6 years older then he and only made that one visit when we got married and yes after everything was all said and done they approved his visa......Big question how are we doing now??????? you can ask anyone that knows us......yes Some times love stories do come true.....My husband and I are still together and are stronger then ever.....I support him in everything he wants to do and he supports me...we have had our times that would be hard on a couple, example 3 miscarriges.......However he has stood by me helped me, cryed with me and let me hold onto him when i needed it most.....I have to to say he is not only my Husband, my love my friend but he is truely my HERO! I have never in my life felt about a man the way I feel about him....Yes we have misunderstandings and sometimes we have times where we need to take a step back and talk things out.....But thats the key word TALK......We follow the Bibles counsel and talk and reason on things.....there are really no words I can say to explaine how I feel about my Husband...I do know that Jehovah God gave him to me not just as a gift but he truely knew what I needed......I will always be greatful for and treasure the gift i have in my husband......6 years of marriage and its only getting better.....I dont know whats around the corner but as long as we keep doing the will of Jehovah I am sure its only going to get better.......every one take care and hope that your journey brings you all the same happiness as mine has brought me...

I hate to say this but people like OP's husband ruin it for everyone else I hope he hasn't ruined her from finding true-love in the future with someone who will value her for HER!

I'm sorry to say, but all this talk of revoke this, contact this, report this...blah blah blah...is all pretty much useless and he will stay in the states and be granted all he wishes to be granted. There are a million ways he will make the system work in his favor. My ex-husband did this to me. We were together, he came to the states, and shortly thereafter he met up with other Nigerians and they all advised him on how he could beat the system and he did. He started an argument with me one day over a phone call and before I knew it ..he was leaving. I cried and begged for him not to leave, but he just kept going. I had no idea where he was staying, he changed his phone number, didnt reply to my emails, etc. I went to homeland security 2 weeks later and reported him gone and told them i suspected fraud. After all this...I found out he said I thru him out of the house, treated him bad, etc. He was granted ALL that he wished for and my name was dragged thru the mud just to save himself. If anyone at the USCIS or any of these places had a brain, they wud reason that why would someone go thru ALLLLL I had to go thru to have him come here, just to throw him out? I mean get real. I was the best wife anyone could be to someone, but they dont even contact you to get your side of the story. They protected him as if he was some victim !!! So please dont waste your time and energy trying to fight anything or get him deported or anything. LET HIM GO. Just move on with your life and put all this behind you. You've spent a LONGGG time going thru the process of having him be there with you...dont waste anymore of your life now trying to undo the process....bcuz in the end, it wont work anyways!! The man I am with now, said something to me, that I will now say to you: This guy you were with and all he did to you..."one day he will surely be paid with the same coin that he spent".

I hope you spent this much time on something productive that will help you today. You have a short time to do what Darnell suggested. Missing that window will bring a lot of pain into your life. You can finish the dirty laundry later. Take out the trash first, then close the door behind you so another can open.

Bad shoes, plantar fascitis, falling arches.

I did the bus trip and other than the bathroom stop I did fine ( ok I am spoiled I expect something I can sit on when I am answering natures call and have long lost the muscles to squat like that ) At least I didn't fall over while at the pit stop. Every time the bus stopped the local sellers flocked to me. ( Think of the albino penguin at feeding time ) I guess they thought my pockets were lined with US dollars.

Regular WU reciepts to Lagos imply more that the Nigerian has found a person to take money from than proof of marital bliss. Your spouse was living before you came along , and the CO's in Lagos are well aware of the tricks used by bad boys to milk money from others. you should never treat Lagos like any other place.

go to www.bt-store.com..

We have a commercial on the radio here that says, "Life is short...have an affair!" Then it directs you to a website to find others who are looing for the same thing. I think it is terrible enough to do that but to advertise and encourage it? Not for me!

A petitioner should treat this process as though there was not a "return to sender" option. It's not fair to look at your role in this journey from a position of leverage and power. People mention the heart of the USC; it's bad enough that USCIS paperwork refer to people as ALIENS (hubby really took offense to that), but to have the frame of mind that only the USC has a heart implies that you believe your worth is more.
When the relationship is USC & USC the issue of returning them is null. Can you truly say the hurt is greater when the person is from another country or is your mentality that you believe you've paid for this person so they owe you?

As it has become clear that the OP is really seeking advice on how to commit immigration fraud, and this is a violation of the Terms of Service for participation on Visa Journey, I am closing this thread to further discussion.

My bad, I didn't see those.
I try to assume the best in everyone posting on here. But in that case this seems to be the type of case which makes everyone going through the Lagos consulate suffer.
OP, you'll get caught if you go through with this. If you somehow make it through the interview, your plan will fail in 2 years when removing conditions. Do it the legal and legit way, or face the consequences. Don't say you weren't warned.

Sorry, but I can't see things any differently from this poster. The OP's story sounds too fishy to me.

Because this is not about the love of any woman; it is about the love of what is believed is in AMERICA. I like to say the quality of life may be different, but the quantity you pay is the same.

Its situations like this that gives Nigeria a bad name..If she is no more interested then why are you still thinking of move over here... :hehe:
And if you have met another person , why not let the new person petition for you :bonk:

http://www.visajourney.com/forums/topic/351050-divorce-during-cr-1-visa-processing/page__p__5145718#entry5145718
Trying to wrap my head around the last line. On 2/07/2012@ 10:59 pm you were still in love with your wife, but in this post you met someone in Feb that you love and she knows all about what's happening with you. I refuse to believe anyone would knowingly walk into a live mine field without thinking there would be a serious pay off. You say you are certain you will be given a visa. You have known for a few months now about YOUR marital issues yet remain diligent in YOUR pursuit of a visa. You clearly don't want to abandon YOUR agenda.
The blessing of this site is it helps those of us who have pure love, but it also gives assistance to those whose intentions are selfish.

It is this kind of foolishness that makes certain VJERS say things like "Nigeria is the highest fraud consulate" "Nigerians are scammers and will do anything to get to America" "Nigerians know every trick in the book",etc. If your marriage is over your "wife" does not have to bring you to the states to divorce. She can contact a lawyer and make it happen. You say you never considered the money you were sending to help her, because she was your wife, but somehow you now seem to think your efforts entitles you to attend an interview for the purpose of still getting here. What do you do for employment that can possibly allow you to send any type of substantial funds here when 1 US dollar is presently worth 155 Naira?? As for you now having a girlfriend and in love with her, YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING!! You can't pretend to be devestated about what your wife is doing and then find love the following month. That pseudonym is definitely befitting!
Sounds like you found some young chick to pay off in exchange for a visa and now the plot is unraveling. You're hoping that you can get the visa, come to the US, get the divorce, and quickly marry this new person. Just shameless!

Hi IDOCARE,
ITS TIME TO MOVE ON NOT ALL NIGERIAN MEN ARE THE SAME I MET MY HBBY ON INTERNET WE JUST HAD A BABY ALL IS GOING WELL ....I SO SORRY U REMAIN HEARTBROKEN BUT ITS TIME TO MOVE ON

Welcome back. Still scorned after so many years. Why so miserable? :rofl: :rofl:

I hope people take the institution of marriage more seriously. It's no cake walk...and things will definitely not always be rosy. I hope you have been able to move on from your past experience.Wish you well..

Not true...my fiance loves my kids...I have 2...he asked about this all the time...and speaks to them..and remembers when their doctor's appointments are and so much more...I asked him...about that because I hear this stereotype before that African men don't marry a woman with children...and he said "why not, where are the rules that say this can't happen?"...now for the most part...the majority of them may not but some do...he did say a man that has no children of his own....and wishes to marry wants to marry someone that can give him his own children (I can and will give him his own)...but don't you think that just as our culture changes...and each generation changes here in America (flower children, baby boomers, etc...) they can change there as well? Their views are not all the same...generations change..their parents may be set on traditional values (not marrying an older woman, or not marrying someone with kids) but some of the new generation doesn't hold this same view... just like my grandparents are "set" in their ways and old school ways...but I have more leverage on my views...not all of them but some of them will marry for real love someone with kids.

Wow! I haven't posted on VJ in some time because there wasn't a post I felt I needed to reply to until I ready this one...I am so thankful for your boldness, truth and honesty for stepping up and speaking out for the "good" men that still exist in your country. I am so tired of hearing people label every single Nigerian bad because of the one's that were wrong...I live in America and God knows we have enough scammers here to be a high-fraud country too. We have those in our government, schools, work places and just common folks...the truth is...real love judges people as individuals...not as a a whooole race of people. Are we not all humans? Can we not find true love from a man/woman from Nigeria? online? why not...there are single sites all over America and people meet on them all day long...it's not about how you met...it's about getting to know one another... I married a man right here in America that was the biggest scammer of them all...I was with him for 10 years and he was full of lies and deceit...I wish someone would have scrutinized our relationship the way they want to do our Nigerian relationships...no body can predict love...nobody knows the whole outcome of any situation...if so then why is the divorce rate in same culture marriages so high, or why are their couples staying together even though they really don't love each other, or so much infidelity...who can truly point the finger at who?...and is their really a race better than another...all I know is that the issue of my man being REAL is settled in MY heart...no body can change my mind...not here on VJ or anywhere else...my case concerning him and his intentions has been put to rest...my sadness and frustration now comes from all the "warnings" about Nigeria...good grief some of them really do marry for love...I would hope that in any relationship a person would want to find out the "truth" about who they are with...is it only Nigerians alone that need to be but through the test?....anybody choosing to be in a relationship needs to test it realness...how many countless relationships have come up in the news over the years where the man was previously a murderer, or rapist, a child molester, or had another family...and the wife didn't know until years later...the sterotypes of Nigerians need to stop...judge a person for who they are not for who their culture may be in the majority....it's not fair...we all need a little grace and mercy and I am so grateful that aside from all opinions and what not God is the rightful judge! Great post my friend....great POST!