I'm really really sorry about your situation. I think this decision is very important and has long term consequences. Your family are the only ones who can decide what's right or wrong for your happiness.
From immigration standpoint, if your husband and son leave now, they'll abandon their adjustment of status (is that what they have pending?)
However, if they arrived on tourist visas on April 26, 2025 this year and immediately applied for adjustment - that's really bad. You can't come on tourist visa with intention of adjusting.
Can you tell us more about what petitions are pending?