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Biden Rushed Into Surgery After Eating Sock WASHINGTON—After paramedics used a scalpel to open an airway and keep him from asphyxiating en route to the hospital, President Joe Biden was reportedly rushed into surgery at Walter Reed National Military Medical Center on Wednesday to remove a sock that had become lodged in his throat after he tried to eat it. "While it's true President Biden partially ingested a striped dress sock earlier today, I want to assure everyone that this is a routine surgery, and the president is expected to be back home enjoying his favorite treats in just a few hours," said White House press secretary Karine Jean-Pierre, who confirmed the commander-in-chief had stolen the sock from a partially open drawer in the Executive Residence while Secret Service agents weren't looking and had [...] https://theonion.com/biden-rushed-into-surgery-after-eating-sock/

First Baptist Church Softball Team Defeats Chicago White Sox 7-2 CHICAGO, IL — In what experts described as the final insult during the last week of what has been a dreadful season, the Chicago White Sox were defeated by the First Baptist Church softball team by a score of 7-2. White Sox team executives had hoped that taking a brief break from their historic losing season and playing against the church softball team on their off day might boost the club's confidence, but the plan backfired when First Baptist mercilessly bludgeoned the team. [...] https://babylonbee.com/news/first-baptist-church-softball-team-defeats-chicago-white-sox-7-2

~~~~~~~ Experts Warn Hurricane In Hurricane Alley During Hurricane Season Clear Sign Of Climate Change [...] "This situation is completely unprecedented," said global warming expert and local dog groomer Rodney Carlson. "I've never seen a hurricane of this magnitude forming in hurricane alley during the hurricane season, and my records go back over 75 days! Clearly, this can only be explained by global warming." [...] https://babylonbee.com/news/experts-warn-hurricane-forming-in-hurricane-alley-during-hurricane-season-is-clear-sign-of-climate-change

~~~~~~~~~~~~~ After 20 Years, Man Makes Tearful, Difficult Decision To Change Wallets EAGAN, MN — Family and friends of Lance Williams recently confirmed that the 45-year-old was just forced into the tearful, harrowing decision to change his wallet after 20 years together. According to sources familiar with the situation, Williams was compelled to finally make the switch after his former wallet disintegrated into a small pile of dust when he pulled it out to pay his bill at a restaurant. [...] https://babylonbee.com/news/after-20-years-man-makes-tearful-difficult-decision-to-change-wallets

In Hilarious Gaffe, Biden Tells 'The View' He Was Forced Out Of Power In Vicious Coup NEW YORK, NY — Continuing what has become a beloved tradition of his presidency, Joe Biden suffered yet another hilarious gaffe, telling the hosts of The View that he was the victim of a hostile coup. The hilarious story, which the daytime talk show's host panel laughed off as just another quirky moment from the elderly leader, featured Biden good-naturedly retelling the tale of how a ruthless power-hungry cabal stole the presidency right out from under him. [...] https://babylonbee.com/news/in-hilarious-gaffe-biden-tells-the-view-he-was-forced-out-of-power-in-vicious-coup

These US states have the worst-behaved drivers: See where your state ranks Researchers recently determined which U.S. states have the worst-behaved drivers, and the results may surprise you. Forbes Advisor published their findings last month, analyzing 19 "bad" driving behaviors to determine how common they were in certain states. The behaviors included running a red light, eating while driving and texting behind the wheel. Other behaviors were changing lanes without signaling, cutting other drivers off and "honking/cursing/gesturing at another driver in anger." The study also considered drivers who caused accidents, reported speeding in a school zone and drove under the influence of alcohol or drugs. [...] https://www.foxbusiness.com/lifestyle/us-states-have-worst-behaved-drivers-see-where-your-state-ranks

This is indeed a cute little girl! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Thailand's adorable pygmy hippo Moo Deng has the kind of face that launches a thousand memes CHONBURI, Thailand (AP) — Only a month after Thailand's adorable baby hippo Moo Deng was unveiled on Facebook, her fame became unstoppable. Fans unable to make the two-hour drive to Khao Kheow Open Zoo from the Thai capital Bangkok to see her in person can watch her video clips online, or simply scroll through social media to savor meme after meme. Zookeeper Atthapon Nundee has been posting cute moments of the animals in his care for about five years. He never imagined the zoo's newborn pygmy hippo would become an internet megastar within weeks. Cars started lining up outside the zoo well before it opened Thursday. Visitors traveled from near and far for a chance to see the pudgy, expressive 2-month-old in person at the zoo about 100 kilometers (60 miles) southeast of Bangkok. The pit where Moo Deng lives with her mom, Jona, was packed almost immediately, with people cooing and cheering every time the pink-cheeked baby animal made skittish movements. [...] https://apnews.com/article/moo-deng-baby-hippo-thailand-zoo-27485f0cbc70071252be45d870d507aa

This is indeed a cute little girl! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Thailand's adorable pygmy hippo Moo Deng has the kind of face that launches a thousand memes CHONBURI, Thailand (AP) — Only a month after Thailand's adorable baby hippo Moo Deng was unveiled on Facebook, her fame became unstoppable. Fans unable to make the two-hour drive to Khao Kheow Open Zoo from the Thai capital Bangkok to see her in person can watch her video clips online, or simply scroll through social media to savor meme after meme. Zookeeper Atthapon Nundee has been posting cute moments of the animals in his care for about five years. He never imagined the zoo's newborn pygmy hippo would become an internet megastar within weeks. Cars started lining up outside the zoo well before it opened Thursday. Visitors traveled from near and far for a chance to see the pudgy, expressive 2-month-old in person at the zoo about 100 kilometers (60 miles) southeast of Bangkok. The pit where Moo Deng lives with her mom, Jona, was packed almost immediately, with people cooing and cheering every time the pink-cheeked baby animal made skittish movements. [...] https://apnews.com/article/moo-deng-baby-hippo-thailand-zoo-27485f0cbc70071252be45d870d507aa

So much for electing a former cop. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ BREAKING: NYC Mayor Eric Adams Indicted on Criminal Charges, Expected to be Arrested The New York Times is reporting that New York City mayor Eric Adams has been indicted on criminal charges following a federal corruption investigation. Scant few details on the indictment were available as of Wednesday evening: [...] https://redstate.com/terichristoph/2024/09/25/breaking-nyc-mayor-eric-adams-indicted-on-criminal-charges-expected-to-be-arrested-n2179793

Our ballots will be safely handled now! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ GOING POSTAL: USPS Union Sends Letter to Members Calling Trump an 'Existential Threat' [...] From prominent Democrats to the media, many people continue to fan the flames and incite violence because they have terminal cases of Trump Derangement Syndrome. We can add the post office to this list now. [...] https://twitchy.com/amy-curtis/2024/09/25/postal-union-trump-is-existential-threar-n2401400

Monkeyshines in Madison regarding duplicate ballots. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Madison's deputy city clerk responds to concerns over duplicate ballot error MADISON (WKOW) -- Deputy Clerk of the City of Madison Jim Verbick is responding to concerns over a data processing error that caused 2,215 duplicate ballots to be sent out across 10 wards. [...] https://www.wkow.com/news/top-stories/madisons-deputy-city-clerk-responds-to-concerns-over-duplicate-ballot-error/article_38524af0-7ab5-11ef-b1f7-3f4551b8c492.html

Gee -- a month from the election and involving a swing state? Coincidence! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Trump forced to cancel Wisconsin rally after Secret Service says it 'did not have sufficient assets' to secure event: whistleblower https://thepostmillennial.com/trump-forced-to-cancel-wisconsin-rally-after-secret-service-says-it-did-not-have-sufficient-assets-to-secure-event-whistleblower

Secret Service Knew of Trump Shooter 27 Minutes Before Shots Fired A U.S. Senate committee's report on Secret Service failures around the first Trump assassination attempt reveals that the Secret Service found out about Thomas Crooks' suspicious behavior almost half an hour before he shot the president and killed another man. The injuries of Donald Trump and multiple rally attendees and the death of Corey Comperatore could all have been prevented had the Secret Service taken the report of a "suspicious person with a rangefinder around the AGR building approximately 27 minutes before the shooting" seriously, the bipartisan report demonstrates (read it below). The incompetence, whether deliberate or accidental, of the Secret Service cost a life and changed American politics. Now there needs to be major accountability for those responsible for this and other egregious failures at the Pennsylvania rally. There are numerous noteworthy findings in the Senate Homeland Security Committee report, but I will list below a number that I found particularly disturbing and significant. [...] https://pjmedia.com/catherinesalgado/2024/09/25/secret-service-knew-of-trump-shooter-27-mins-before-shots-fired-n4932816

Top Kamala Surrogate Calls to 'Extinguish' Trump 'for Good' [...] "Let's extinguish him for good. We have an answer — a remarkably talented candidate in Harris." [...] https://pjmedia.com/matt-margolis/2024/09/25/top-kamala-surrogate-calls-to-extinguish-trump-for-good-n4932819

Proof that missiles are stored in civilian houses... and pretty cool to see. https://x.com/DrEliDavid/status/1838316170828542013?ref_src=twsrc^tfw|twcamp^tweetembed|twterm^1838316170828542013|twgr^6c6efb939d8567caa6b28591aaba44c9a96c5076|twcon^s1_&ref_url=https%3A%2F%2Fpjmedia.com%2Fcharlie-martin%2F2024%2F09%2F25%2Fisraels-hezbollah-hunt-xontinues-n4932822

Looks like a slight leadership vacuum here:

"From the Liver to the Knee!" 💥

Look at the quote from Kommie in here! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Did Kamala Just Implode Her Campaign With Another Disastrous Interview? After reading the tea leaves, the Harris-Walz campaign discovered that it was a problem that Kamala wasn't doing interviews, and so they basically decided to put her out there and hope for the best. Well, it's not going well, and I can't help but wonder if this is why Trump's been seeing momentum in recent polling. Frankly, I expect more movement in Trump's direction after her latest interview on Wednesday with Stephanie Ruhle of MSNBC. Seriously, this interview showed us (again) why Kamala was not the candidate that Democrats genuinely wanted to run after Joe Biden dropped out. [...] https://pjmedia.com/matt-margolis/2024/09/25/did-kamala-just-implode-her-campaign-with-another-disastrous-interview-n4932840

Thrilling Wednesday report, see man: We indeed re-crossed the weight Mendoza Line, fractionally man. Awoke feeling awful, unsure why except perhaps too much partying with the rubias man. Even took temperature twice, Many degrees both times man. Breakfast was a sliced-turkey sandwich, didn't help much man. We decided that we needed more zzz, back to bed after skool run man. In the hour-plus that we had allocated, the following happened, see man: 1. A text beeped, man. 2. A loud yard crew began its infernal work, man. Many. Someone rang the doorbell, man. Our siesta was rather hosed, to say the least man. We managed to get to Mama T-B. right on time, midday doc caucus for senior she man man. Mama T-B. lectured us about the usual Many items but without much yelling, minor miracle man. Returned to casa at 2 p.m., treat/lunch expectant miu man. Lunch/din-din for us was Tuna Glop, ingest we man. A second siesta was more successful than the first, some improvement man. Ex-Mrs.-T-B. took Mini-B. + amigo to basketball camp, non-Two-Guys eve man. Dished and de-dished the warsher, domestic we man. Mini-B. embedded earlier than deadline, minor miracle man. No party with the rubias tonight, no cavort we man. Nothing formal scheduled for Thursday in case we are sick, opportune man. And that was/is our thrilling Wednesday, report we man.

This is a really nice story -- worth reading -- by the Pennsylvania chick who's very much on the ground there. And do we think that Kommie Harris would have a roundtable inside a barn? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ In Pennsylvania tour, Trump hits all the right places and messages [...] The visit to Kittanning was the second of three stops the former president made during his visit to Western Pennsylvania on Monday. He traversed over 100 miles throughout Allegheny, Armstrong, Indiana, and Westmoreland counties. Meandering through mostly back roads, all along the way, Trump's motorcade was greeted by thousands of people gathering in front of their small towns, suburban bedroom enclaves, or standing in front of their farms with their tractors or cows, waving Terrible Towels, makeshift Trump signs, or official Trump-Vance flags. And even along the jersey barriers of the halted traffic on the Pennsylvania Turnpike, people stood on top of their cars or in front of them to wave. The former president began the morning in the tiny town of Smithton on a farm surrounded by cornfields and rolling hills for a policy roundtable in a barn with local farmers. [...] https://www.washingtonexaminer.com/in_focus/3165160/pennsylvania-trump-hits-right-places-messages/

Ooo! ~~~~ Joe Biden's disastrous legacy of crime at home and war abroad is on full display in his final UN speech In 1980, the Boston Globe put a place-holding headline on an editorial about a speech by President Jimmy Carter. "Mush from the wimp," the headline read — and it appeared in more than 150,000 copies of the paper before editors caught their error and removed it. I thought about that headline as I watched Joe Biden's UN speech Tuesday. The similarities go far beyond another mushy speech from another wimpy president. [...] https://nypost.com/2024/09/24/opinion/joe-bidens-disastrous-legacy-of-crime-at-home-and-war-abroad-on-full-display-in-his-final-un-speech/

With A Compliant Driveby Media, Anything Goes In Modern America. Anything. In May 1987, the Miami Herald published a story suggesting that Gary Hart, an initial frontrunner in the Democratic primary, was involved in an extramarital affair. The situation escalated when reporters began investigating further, leading to a famous photo of Hart with a young woman on a yacht named "Monkey Business." The story broke just as Hart was gaining momentum in the polls, causing a significant backlash. Faced with mounting pressure and media scrutiny, Hart suspended his campaign. In today's America, the Hart story seems unreal. For Democrats, anything goes, really, anything, because a fawning media has abdicated its fourth estate role to scrutinize the actions of our political leaders. Here are four examples, all within the last few days. [...] https://tippinsights.com/with-a-compliant-driveby-media-anything-goes-in-modern-america-anything/

A weak and delusional Biden at the UN President Joe Biden delivered his final address as president to the United Nations General Assembly on Tuesday, and it was a masterpiece of narcissistic myth-making. It was a speech of hollow boasts that couldn't have been delivered at a worse time, as America is increasingly disregarded and disrespected around the world by enemies and allies alike. Casting himself as a great defender of democracy worldwide, Biden tried to turn the coup that removed him as the leader of his own party into an act of historic self-sacrifice. "This summer," he observed, "I faced a decision whether to seek a second term as president. It was a difficult decision. Being president has been the honor of my life. There's so much more I want to get done. But as much as I love the job, I love my country more. I decided after 50 years of public service, it's time for a new generation of leadership to take my nation forward. My fellow leaders, let us never forget that some things are more important than staying in power." What? [...] https://www.washingtonexaminer.com/opinion/3164847/weak-delusional-biden-at-un/

https://babylonbee.com/news/shout-for-joy-here-are-the-top-10-verses-from-the-new-kamala-harris-bible-translation