Shauna&Wael

How can you not see that it sounds like you're stamping your feet and throwing a temper tantrum? I can honestly see why this woman can't stand you

Judging by his behavior listed in this thread, I somehow don't think making him leave would be a cakewalk. Manipulation is the only surefire way to do it!

Judging by his behavior listed in this thread, I somehow don't think making him leave would be a cakewalk. Manipulation is the only surefire way to do it!

I'm sorry but he does not sound homesick. He does not sound like hes trying....trying to compromise, trying to sacrifice nor learn about America et al. Culture shock aside, not sure why it requires so much burden of proof, to prove him wrong...a foreigner. Does not make sense. Quite simply hes being a jerk. CA is pretty well known for being pretty accommodating and liberal. Its not like you live in some more isolated regions in more remote parts of US. My fiance comes from a communist govt and people do think what they see on tv is true or they certainly are curious about it. But they dont insist they know more about the US than I do. Propaganda or not. Nor do I presume I know more about their homeland cause I have unfettered access to google. I always made it a point to ask about all the small little things to understand how things worked there or here. How much gas was, how far it went. How people get paid. How their time off works. How much a vehicle costs....etc. He doesn't seem to care or thinks he knows better.
He needs a big time reality check and I wish you well regardless. Something needs to change here.

I'm no expert on Cuban culture but I am pretty sure that being abusive, rude, selfish and mean is not part of it. From what you've described OP, this guy sounds like an a-grade jerk who needs to have his a** and his lobster booked on the first flight home. This isn't homesickness. This is emotional abuse and him taking advantage of your nature.
You sound like a loving and kind person. If nothing else, you deserve so much better than what he is bringing to the table. Get rid of him and fall in love with someone who appreciates and cherishes your love, not takes advantage of it.

He sounds like he is egocentric not home sick. A home sick person doesnt need clothes for $1800 or a lobster plate for $80. Him treating you that way is not a gentelman way, and I honestly think that you shouldnt go with your marriage with him. You are not happy, clearly he is not happy and not willing to change to make you happy. I wouldn't even talk to him, buy a return ticket fo to airport and tell him good bye. He doesn't have to be in the US if he doesn't like it. Honestly I feel like he is using you for green card. If you go with the marriage, there is a big chance he will leave you after he gets what he wants. Madam all I can say be careful and be wise. Don't let your emotions control you.

1) Tell him you've bought a surprise vacation back to Cuba for the two of you because he's feeling homesick.
2) Wait until he's sleeping
3) Buy the next available ticket back to the USA for you only.
This is not a love relationship. It's a slave and their master.

How can you not see that it sounds like you're stamping your feet and throwing a temper tantrum? I can honestly see why this woman can't stand you

How can you not see that it sounds like you're stamping your feet and throwing a temper tantrum? I can honestly see why this woman can't stand you

How can you not see that it sounds like you're stamping your feet and throwing a temper tantrum? I can honestly see why this woman can't stand you

How can you not see that it sounds like you're stamping your feet and throwing a temper tantrum? I can honestly see why this woman can't stand you

I'm sure you Brits in America have experienced lots of attention because of your accent. We seldom go out without some woman telling my husband "I just love your accent". Last night on Halloween was the best ever.
This tiny tot of a girl dressed as a cowgirl with horse incorporated as part of the costume came to the door. My husband chatted with her saying he liked her outfit and asked the name of her horse. He gave her candy and said "Happy Halloween". As she walked away, she turned to her mother and said, "I like his voice".
It seems even four-year-old cowgirls are charmed by a British accent. Too cute!!

How can you not see that it sounds like you're stamping your feet and throwing a temper tantrum? I can honestly see why this woman can't stand you

What have you done to maintain the US as you permanent residency.
You say you have 2 children presumably also a husband, you would leave them?
Have you been filing your US taxes? If not, why not?

Okay- so you are right, if there is NO DIVORCE and you refuse to sign the forms she doesnt qualify (she doesnt meet VAWA, hardship etc)
However the part you are missing which several people have expressed (not directly) is the following:
Divorce can be initiated by EITHER party in the marriage. There is no such thing as one spouse stating I dont want it so its not going to happen. No one is required to be married to someone they dont wish to be. It doesnt matter if both parties agree to the divorce, once it is initiated (by either spouse) it is going to happen.
So if you do not initiate the divorce- what will happen is once your spouse realizes you wont be filing for removal jointly (signing the forms) she will be forced to initiate the divorce (if she wants to ROC). USCIS has procedures for situations like this. She will file for divorce and submit them proof the divorce is pending but not approved yet. Basically they will accept that proof and delay making a decision on her ROC until the divorce is final. She may end up going to Immigration court to ask for such an extension. Its complicated but there are provisions for it.
There is nothing you can do to stop her from initiating the divorce nor stop the divorce from happening. Period.
On a side note I believe in PA there is a mandatory 12 month separation period before a divorce can occur. Your choice is whether you want to initiate divorce proceedings NOW (because you know the marriage is over) OR wait for her. She will then decide to initiate them so she can ROC or she may decide she doesnt want to be an LPR anymore and still file for divorce but leave the country rather then applying. The decision to apply or leave is going to be up to her. There is nothing you can do to affect this beyond having conversations and stressing to her your desire to have her leave and the pros of a pro/con list of doing so.

How can you not see that it sounds like you're stamping your feet and throwing a temper tantrum? I can honestly see why this woman can't stand you

How can you not see that it sounds like you're stamping your feet and throwing a temper tantrum? I can honestly see why this woman can't stand you

How can you not see that it sounds like you're stamping your feet and throwing a temper tantrum? I can honestly see why this woman can't stand you

How can you not see that it sounds like you're stamping your feet and throwing a temper tantrum? I can honestly see why this woman can't stand you

How can you not see that it sounds like you're stamping your feet and throwing a temper tantrum? I can honestly see why this woman can't stand you

Here's what can happen: she gets close to the 90 days from her conditional GC expiring and will ask you to sign the ROC form. You say no. She gets an immigration lawyer that tells her she needs to divorce you. She divorces you. She gets the waiver. You cannot do anything to stop her. Stop thinking of ways to get her. Even if she is not an LPR, but a foreign citizen, she is still allowed to appear in court for the divorce if she so chooses and make your life a living hell... USC or not, LPR or not.

My advice is spend your energy on something productive. You don't hold the hammer here. This is not a rare occurrence. If your spouse is intent on staying, it's likely she will. There are no immigration police squads out there following up on these things. She can divorce you and then proceed with the immigration issues.
As I said, it's survivable.

I concur, it is a game! these guys are collecting pay checks sitting on their desk doing nothing! and not even answering the phone when calling NVC - there are times I stayed for more than an hour for a Rep. to answer the phone telling me BS you gotta wait 60, 42 , 30 etc days for one document to be reviewed by a supervisor, which they are not available 99% of the times or at the meetings! it's ridiculous!

Mail, how does he know your address and is that not a federal offense.
Phone, change your number
What have his friends and family now got to do with you?
E mail, Spam settings or a new e mail account.
I assumed when you go through the DV process they give you guidance?