Maya&Matt

1. As he entered on a K1 there is a chance he will be approved without interview. That's taking a while. If there's an interview and you attend saying "we're filing for a divorce once he has his GC" it doesn't' matter how much evidence you have of your relationship, they're going to think you're just helping him fraudulently get a GC. It just doesn't sound good.
2. You are locked into the I-864 until any of the conditions listed on the form occur. this does not mean that you need to pay him, or are liable for his debts, but you MIGHT be sued by the US government to repay any means-tested benefits he uses... and to be honest, with Obamacare making healthcare mandatory, we've got no idea what sort of eligibility changes may occur. I would say it increases the risks of him using those benefits because he "has to".
3. Usually 30 days after denial I believe.
4. Well outside of the I-864 no. If you interview it will look like you both lied in the interview and planned to divorce all along. Might make his ROC harder... might might might.
Personally I wouldn't do it. He can go leave the US, buy/rent another house, get another job (or see if he can get his old one back). It's not ideal but you would be protecting yourself. You don't need to write a letter with your I-864 withdrawal but you can if you like, stating that it's only because of the incompatibility. I have to ask why "being happy" means YOU sacrifice your financial security just so that HE gets to stay here. Why can't "everyone be happy" mean he returns to his home country, you continue on with your life. Why does he have to gain and you lose?
I've seen enough things occur on these boards over the years that the idea of letting theI-864 get locked in and being on the hook financially when you know your relationship isn't viable... is terrifying to me.
p.s. I am the immigrant. I would have gone home had the relationship failed. I would STILL return to Australia, even this long in. That's because I'm not here for the GC. I can make my way back home perfectly fine. Yes I gave up possession, work etc, but I can get those back.

You have bigger problems in your marriage than immigration when your spouse decides to leave without discussing it with you first.

Im confuse as to why he went back to mexico if you guys are having money problems, You already used 1070$ for AOS and now you wont get that back why cant he just wait until he get ead and than work to support you and the babies. Going back will only make things worse now you well start the process of I-130 and do interview again and this time they will make it harder on him ( hopefully not) . Plus you have a newborn baby omg sorry to say this but he is stupid for going wiithout letting you know...but i wish you good luck with the future petition though..

So, it's okay to deny a mother's love?
Why should you want to deny this child the love and care of a mother?
How is life with a US father who doesn't know how to care for the child when there is a loving mother?
Why do you assume that life for the child would be better in the US?

Sorry to hear about all of that, it does sound like a very bad situation.
Where do you live?
Something's got to change, for sure. A lot's got to change, really. Removing conditions on your GC doesn't mean you have to stay. You can leave at any time, so if I were you I would make that decision separately from the immigration aspect of it. I know it's a bit more money if you file it, but I think if you let that be the pressure you will be more unhappy, with time ticking away.
Can you get the police to come and evict the brother or get the parents to intervene and get him out? That sounds awful.
Can you move to another state/town where people are more worldly and there are more job opportunities?
It sounds like your husband isn't good with money, and even those past decisions are coming back now, like him choosing the cheapy insurance that later gets him in trouble.
I think if you got him out of debt he should be kissing your feet. What a great thing to do for him, you should be proud.
I know you said you don't want help with how to fit in, but I think if you were open to it a lot of VJers have good ideas, commiseration, and also good ideas on how to find jobs. What was your line of work in the UK?
I feel really bad for immigrants to move to backwater/provincial places. I have a lot of respect for people who can move to those places and make it okay. I just hear so many stories from people about how their neighbors are rude to them and it just makes me so sad. I wish USCs would think about this before moving their loved ones to their provincial town where no one has left the county line.

Off the wall projecting and your own personal baggage are not at all helpful here. How in the heck do you gather from the post that
she knew of the illegal activities ? Been in her house the whole time ? Can't believe this post got 4 likes.
Stupid aSSumptions and speculation.

It seems to me that you have an issue with the OP because of your personal problems with your wife. The problems that the OP is talking about seem to reflect your conflicts and what make you unhappy.
Deal with your problems without "hating people like the OP".
Namaste.

Shame on anyone who thinks the victim has blame in this. It's doesn't take 2 involved parties to carry off a deciept. It is like saying a person that has intercourse with someone with AIDS helped the AIDS get spread if they didn't have a sign that it was being hidden from them. I think there need to be slower tougher rules for the immigrant to remain in the US and quicker exits for those that are shown to be fraudsters. Don't reward evil.

I just read in another thread that someone adjusting from a K1 got an interview notice after 11 months of waiting. I have only been waiting for five months, but I find this situation (= K1's waiting so long while many of the ones adjusting from tourist/student visas get their interviews and GC's within 2-3 months) unbearable. It feels like us who do everything by the books are getting punished for doing things the 100 percent legal way.
Good luck to all K1's - let's hope for a speedy approval!

Hey All,
So this is probably more of a rant than anything else, but I'm seriously disheartened by my situation! I started my K1 journey Jan 2012...approved Jan 13, married April 5th YAAAYYYYY. I moved to the US in March 13 after a long and stressful wait (as well all know!!). I'm currently waiting for my AOS, AP and EAD to be approved.
Now I have read on another members thread that said person came to the US on a holiday visa and 'decided to marry' there and then, and is merrily AOS-ing now...without any prior planning, paperwork etc...I mean no disrespect to this couple, but I'm dismayed at the struggle me and my husband have gone through and still are, to find out that this is allowed?
I may sound selfish or childish here, but there isn't any equality here is there?
Sorry if this comes across as bitchy or negative, just finding it hard not being allowed to work yet or visit my family

sds mental abuse is one of form of the abuse as well, but you have to prove bonafide marriage and it seems you don't have enough proof.
Someone said "What happened to cause her to want to slap you? Did you do something to provoke her?", as an advocate for victim of domestic violence i ask you please to seek some information about domestic violence, there is no excuse for domestic violence EVER! This bs did you do something to provoke her is outrageous to say the least, nobody deserves to be abused, ever! yes slap is considered abuse.

Mimolicious, your post is useless, you should go get a Life. Am I responsible for that mistake, Yes.
Do government workers sucks, Yes.
Why ? Because instead of just letting me know that I forgot something, they want me to restart the whole process all over again, adding more work for themselves and more wait periods for all the others in line. That was a human mistake it's fixable, I don't see why they couldn't send a letter saying ' hey you forgot the birth certificate you have got 48 hours to send it over' instead of Denying the whole process ( which is a waste of time and taxpayer money )
Thank you though

I am so sorry that must be tough, break ups can be really hard on you mentally so remember to take some time for yourself to sort through your feelings before you move on. Make sure you deal with it now so you don't have to come back to it later. I hope things get better for you!

I have to agree with this post 100%.
I do honor those who have fought and died for this country but I also honor those who died in the streets when the "jokes" this country
had to endure went too far and hindered the pursuit of happiness and liberty. The civil rights movement comes to mind and there are countless other "jokes" and dysfunctional ways and stupid regulations within laws in the past and present that need to be overcome.
I by no means compare the hardship of the civil rights movement to immigration today, the reason I brought it up is that to mention America and a joke in the same sentence is alright and to stand up and speak out and make it better is what is needed. Poop on complacency.
People that have died on our streets, not only in wars, to change what was once accepted by main stream America were no less patriotic. They shared the American vision.
I wholeheartedly can say that the broken legal immigration system in the USA is a joke....the only thing is noone is laughing as it is not funny.
I dare anyone who has been in AP for 17 months and then been denied only to be told you may without prejudice refile with a new fee to look me in the face and say that is not a joke. I dare anyone who has been on a 4 year visa journey with a top notch petition package and multiple trips
to tell me it is not a joke.
I dare anyone to explain to me why one location (VSC) reaffirms returned K1 cases and the other location (CSC) never does and lets it expire in a storage facility. Where is the logic when all service centers are under the mighty umbrella of the same USCIS agency ?
I dare anyone who had a CO that refused to issue a visa but emails and says "no you have not been refused but due to my gut feeling I can't issue the visa so I am returning the case to USCIS and let them review it " to get a clue and understand this is a freaking sick "joke".
I fought it and gave it all I got and contacted all I could and still they let it expire.
You don't think it is a joke ? Let me be very clear. IT IS A JOKE ! Right here in America. Period. Why ? Because some knucklehead
burocrat decides he wants to play king on the hill with the lives of the American people. Don't be a sheep and speak out and call it what it is instead of sticking your head in the sand like an ostrich and denying we have a joke of a system. It may work for some but it isn't working for all.
God bless America !

why marry the woman if he has doubts about their relationship?
They should sort out any problem first before moving forward with this immigration path.

I am not sure if any of you remember me because I don't post a lot here but a while back, I applied for an expedite based on my daughter's medical problems. She currently receives many different therapies and facets of medical care due to a brain bleed from birth. We were denied because USCIS felt that we did not meet the criteria to expedite. Since that happened, we have been living life as usual....until last Friday. I went to have my yearly "girly" check up and the doctor found a lump in my breast, which is very concerning. I need to have surgery in about a week to remove it. I became very upset, as you can imagine. I decided that I would fight to get my fiance here and fight for all of you also. I called my congressman, which didn't really get me anywhere. Washington DC is just too big for anyone to really care, I guess. I faxed a letter and a release of information to him that same evening. Monday morning, I still had not heard anything, so I sent an email. Wouldn't you know, I got a call from my congressman yesterday (Tuesday evening). He asked me to explain what has been going on and why I felt I deserved "special" attention. I explained to him about my daughter's medical condition and my new problem. I also explained that everyone in this group has been put through hell by USCIS. I asked him to read some of the posts here. The congressman contacted me again. I am going to meet him Saturday for coffee! He wants to hear all about the immigration issues and how I was treated by the representative I spoke to. I am so excited. I hope it helps us all. Prayers that this works!

There are days in this multi-year process where even the best of partners will get cold feet, worry, have second thoughts, and be scared. This is A SCARY THING for anyone, to pick up and leave their entire life behind, trusting blindly in the future and the love of a partner who is half a world away. It's terrifying and it requires intense patience and trust and sometimes just blind faith. I don't begrudge or think ill of anyone who starts to doubt -- I think it's entirely normal, sane, and human.
However, there are also many more days -- the majority, I am sure -- where we cannot imagine life without our partner, where we are willing to fight and struggle and undertake massive effort to be with our loved one. Where we consider all the good things, the joys and the future together, and all of the effort seems minuscule compared to the payoff.
Unlike some of the responders here, I don't think you need to call it off at all, nor even to worry overmuch. I do think you need to communicate better, and find ways of staying intimate, supportive, and laughing with each other about the absurdities of this horrendous process. I know that there have been times -- months even, before we actually filed and were trying to decide how it all was going to work -- where we both felt it was hopeless, that we'd never make it, that the obstacles were too great. You in particular have been hit with extra delays, and I hope you can find faith and humor in each other, to survive.
My best suggestion is: either visit if you can (the absolute best option, but depending on timing and money, not always possible), or find some new way of maintaining humor and intimacy. Start a new videogame together, make a playlist for each other, document your journey to be together, start any project together that you can share and enjoy again. Let him recapture the joy and love he feels when he's in your presence, and those cold feet will warm right up!
I'd also remind him (as I do with my fiance) that he will not be "trapped" here if things do not work out as you plan. If he leaves before you're married, he goes home, no problem. If you divorce after AOS but before ROC, also no problem: he can remove conditions on his own based on your bonafide intent when you married, or he can return home. His choice, he is free and there are no ill repercussions, apart from the money.

Wishing you and your family the best and Thank You for taking your time to share with us

That's nice to hear coming from someone who had their petition approved in two months, and the visa in hand, in a total of five months.

Had interview at the Holtsville location in Ny yesterday. We were approved !!
I am the usc my husband is adjusting
Our appointment was for 1:00 p.m. We were coming from queens, so it took about an hour by car to reach there. The building is in a good location, very quiet and a lot of parking. The building was very neat and the staff was helpful. We arrived at 12:45 p.m. and went through security, note you have to remove your shoes and belts. Once inside we took our notice to the receptionist where she took our it and told us to have a seat and wait to be called. We waited for about 40 min when our io called our name . He was of Hispanic background and mentioned he was born in the 50's. His first impression scared us, speaking very stern as we had watched other io's kindly greet and shake the hands of their couples. Our io just told us to follow him.
When we got to his office, he swore us in . Not sure if we were recorded but my husband did notice the device hanging, again not sure if it was on. He asked for our id's and all passports. He then immediately went into my husbands prior arrest. My husband was arrested in 2010 for DUI. The io directly asked if it was for drugs, my husband said no.... Out of nervousness I guess. Then the io said that FBI records show it was a class U misdemeanor and was related for drugs. My husband then said yes but he hadnt been smoking. (My husband had his friends in the car who were smoking in the backseat, the cop proceeded to arrest everyone, as my husband was driving. They were all wrong, just giving you guys background. ) he then asked my husband if he still smokes my husband explained he never did that day and he hasn't since. The io then asked me if I believe him, I answered that I wouldnt be with him of he did. The io then said "I know how this works, girls follow what guys do, you probably sit and do drugs with him. " at which point I stopped talking after saying no, because I felt offended. I have never done drugs a day in my life! He then continued on and said "I could imagine they say oh daddy share some with me". I was really thrown off by that from the io. I then told him that my husband has completed the program required by the state and handed evidence of such. He took it and said ok.
He then asked my husband how we met. My husband was my brothers high-school friend. The io asked then why did it get romantic and when. My husband answered, the io was satisfied and moved on. He then asked my husband about his prior marriage. The only real question to me was how old was I and how old was my husband, I said 20 and my husband is 28. He nodded and continued on. He then asked for pictures of our wedding. We showed him our scrapbook. He turned three pages in and closed it. Then he asked for the album and took two photos. My husband kept trying to ease the tension by joking, it seemed to work. He then commented " you wore white on ur wedding day, I remember when that you used to mean something." I asked what he meant. He said that well women should be pure if they do that. I laughed and said " I guess I'm not pure" as again I was a bit thrown off.
He then asked for evidence of a bonafide marriage. I gave him our lease, our bank statements, a copy of our credit cards and a credit card statement. He took a few statements and the card copy. He then handed everything back and said it was enough. He didn't ask for marriage certificates birth certificates as I guess he had it in the file. He did take my husbands I94. And asked him about entry dates and if he ever left since he has been here, which he hasn't. He then said that he's recommending approval but his supervisor has to approve it because of the arrest. And that he wasnt sure about it. But that he would say ok to it. he said " your still a bad boy but your wife saved you." We thanked him and he walked us out. It lasted about 15 min if that.
We received the card production update two hours after the interview.
Sorry for the long post happy my husband and I can continue on for the next 2 years. Good luck to everyone and thanks for all the help!!

Hi, I have to say your comment is so true, this might be a little off topic, but to say the least, she will probably be lucky enough to adjust and I am not begrudgingly saying this but the immigration laws are kind of messed up. People filing for spousal and fiance visas get denied all the time and have tons of proof for strong ties in a relationship but then you have people that are just visiting, overstay then adjust status and never have to leave.

Sure. I do enjoy spend time with them. I am sad to leave them. They are not meaningless. However, this is more important for me to be with my fiancé. Otherwise I wouldn't leave home. I chose that. Plus I am not building anything here. I am just wainting for my new life to begin.
Wether my fiancé is my everything of not is really up to us. And we are pretty much everything to each other. It doesn't mean that we shouldn't have a life, friends of our own, a job, whatever... But he is my best friend, the one I share every thing that matters, the one I enjoy little stuff with, the one I feel most understood with, the one that makes me feel life is smooth and nice and little things that upset me don't matter. And life is too short. So yes, life is better with him, and so I want this. I don't enjoy at all spending 8 months away from my fiancé, and can't say this is not a pain. And I would do anything I could to make it shorter.
(But I still don't think there should be a short line for paying more)
My point is, waiting 8 months is too long. Of course we can live through it. But let's not pretend it doesn't matter. Maybe it isn't a big problem for some of us. Some could say that if you are not upset to be separated with your fiancé for 8 months, then there is a problem, you don't really love your fiancé. Just as you can argue that if you can't get through the process, your couple is not worth it anyway.
Please, to all who would be tempted, stop saying that wanting this process to be shorter is a sign of a problem in a relationship we don't know anything about. It is just people who think and feel differently, and they are totally allowed to be frustrated without anyone judging their relationship.

Hi all,
I wanted to share my story in case it could help someone one day. I have been granted an emergency AP due to a family emergency that happened on January 28th. By then, I was with AOS, EAD and AP pending and I had the biometrics appointment the following week (6th Feb). That day my mother called me with terrible news, my father had been rushed into the hospital to have an emergency open heart surgery, and there was a very high risk he wouldn't survive the surgery or the post operatory. I managed to go back into the forums of visajourney, and find a case of an emergency AP (I had read it just the night before...). We called USCIS who could only grant me an expedite AP (which would still take at least 5 days) and we also tried an infopass, but it was for 2 weeks later. So my husband and I took all the documents I had read about on the visajourney thread and went to the local office (NYC). We went through security quite fast as it was already around 2pm and the line was pretty short. The first woman we talked to was quite rude and didn't want to let us go see an officer upstairs. But finally she agreed to call her supervisor and sent us upstairs. After a short wait, an officer called our number and we explained him our situation. He was very nice and understanding. But he said I needed the biometrics done to get the AP, so he called the office of the biometrics and told them it was an emergency. We went straight there and I had my biometrics taken after a few minutes (there was absolutely no one else in the office). However I couldn't get the AP that same day as it was too late to go back to the USCIS office. The officer had told us to come back the next morning with the biometrics done and a proof of my father's situation. The next morning we went back very early (go there as soon as they open, otherwise there is a huge line later on), and we took the following documents:
- the I-131 form filled (explaining the situation)
- the 3 NOA's we had
- my passport
- 2 pictures
- the biometrics letter
- a letter from the hospital (in English)
We asked to talk to the same officer as he had kept some of my documents the day before. He was very nice again, and after what seemed a long time to me, he granted me the emergency AP and gave it to me right there.
I was able to take a flight that same afternoon and got to Spain the following morning. My father survived the surgery and after a few days at the intensive care unit he was out of danger. He is now back home (after spending over 3 weeks at the hospital) and slowly recovering.
I wanted to thank all the visajourney members, without your help, I wouldn't have known I could try to get an emergency AP, I would have left the US anyway and now I would have to start all over the long process to be back with my love.
If you are ever in the same situation. Just GO TO YOUR LOCAL OFFICE. You can't loose anything for trying. If they don't want to let you in, keep insisting until they do. Make sure you have all the documents I mentioned and insist until you see an officer.
Thanks again visajourney
Maya