Simeon

OP, my Chinese wife has not yet come to the US or even visited, but I've spent almost a full year's worth of time in China over the years we have been in a relationship and now married. This is my 2 cents on what I've learned from my 7 year relationship with my Chinese wife. TL;DR: Your wife and you need to learn how to compromise and respect each other's cultures.
In a multicultural relationship, the very first thing we had to do as a couple was to make the realization that although we are both human beings, we have different cultures and values. I am an American Born Chinese (ABC), and so the culture gap was not as wide, but I still do things in an American way (OMG, soap is not poison!!).
The second step was to accept the differences and concede the small stuff. When I get sick, I'd rather take an ibuprofen than the crapshoot known as kanlangen, which my wife swears by. That's fine, you take your medicine, and I'll take mine. Your mom wants to live with us in our house when you're pregnant? Sorry, not going to happen, but I can compromise by renting her a modest condo or room nearby. Does it cost more cash? Yes, but it shows that I respect her culture (filial piety) while at the same time respecting mine (independence).
Finally, the third step was to integrate each other's cultures as much as possible. I am not great at it, but I'm learning Chinese. In fact, I'm typing this out here in Shanghai on a business trip speaking (bad) Chinese everyday to my coworkers. It's uncomfortable and tiring speaking a foreign language, but you know what? My wife does it with me everyday, and it isn't much easier, especially after she moves to the US.
OP, to put it frankly, your wife came to the US without the intent to integrate into American culture. I can see it from her actions and her life compartmentalization. She wants a Chinese life in the States. There will need to be those compromises between both of you (e.g. the mother-in-law living in an apartment you paid for) and those times where you just look the other way (e.g. me finding kanlangen for my wife when she's sick in the States). But in order to successfully acculturate to the US, your wife also needs to integrate into American society by find a job or hobby that helps her rub shoulders with Americans, and in time, she will come to understand and respect your American ways of living (in America!). She needs to be the one who chooses this path or the ticket home.

OP, my Chinese wife has not yet come to the US or even visited, but I've spent almost a full year's worth of time in China over the years we have been in a relationship and now married. This is my 2 cents on what I've learned from my 7 year relationship with my Chinese wife. TL;DR: Your wife and you need to learn how to compromise and respect each other's cultures.
In a multicultural relationship, the very first thing we had to do as a couple was to make the realization that although we are both human beings, we have different cultures and values. I am an American Born Chinese (ABC), and so the culture gap was not as wide, but I still do things in an American way (OMG, soap is not poison!!).
The second step was to accept the differences and concede the small stuff. When I get sick, I'd rather take an ibuprofen than the crapshoot known as kanlangen, which my wife swears by. That's fine, you take your medicine, and I'll take mine. Your mom wants to live with us in our house when you're pregnant? Sorry, not going to happen, but I can compromise by renting her a modest condo or room nearby. Does it cost more cash? Yes, but it shows that I respect her culture (filial piety) while at the same time respecting mine (independence).
Finally, the third step was to integrate each other's cultures as much as possible. I am not great at it, but I'm learning Chinese. In fact, I'm typing this out here in Shanghai on a business trip speaking (bad) Chinese everyday to my coworkers. It's uncomfortable and tiring speaking a foreign language, but you know what? My wife does it with me everyday, and it isn't much easier, especially after she moves to the US.
OP, to put it frankly, your wife came to the US without the intent to integrate into American culture. I can see it from her actions and her life compartmentalization. She wants a Chinese life in the States. There will need to be those compromises between both of you (e.g. the mother-in-law living in an apartment you paid for) and those times where you just look the other way (e.g. me finding kanlangen for my wife when she's sick in the States). But in order to successfully acculturate to the US, your wife also needs to integrate into American society by find a job or hobby that helps her rub shoulders with Americans, and in time, she will come to understand and respect your American ways of living (in America!). She needs to be the one who chooses this path or the ticket home.

OP, my Chinese wife has not yet come to the US or even visited, but I've spent almost a full year's worth of time in China over the years we have been in a relationship and now married. This is my 2 cents on what I've learned from my 7 year relationship with my Chinese wife. TL;DR: Your wife and you need to learn how to compromise and respect each other's cultures.
In a multicultural relationship, the very first thing we had to do as a couple was to make the realization that although we are both human beings, we have different cultures and values. I am an American Born Chinese (ABC), and so the culture gap was not as wide, but I still do things in an American way (OMG, soap is not poison!!).
The second step was to accept the differences and concede the small stuff. When I get sick, I'd rather take an ibuprofen than the crapshoot known as kanlangen, which my wife swears by. That's fine, you take your medicine, and I'll take mine. Your mom wants to live with us in our house when you're pregnant? Sorry, not going to happen, but I can compromise by renting her a modest condo or room nearby. Does it cost more cash? Yes, but it shows that I respect her culture (filial piety) while at the same time respecting mine (independence).
Finally, the third step was to integrate each other's cultures as much as possible. I am not great at it, but I'm learning Chinese. In fact, I'm typing this out here in Shanghai on a business trip speaking (bad) Chinese everyday to my coworkers. It's uncomfortable and tiring speaking a foreign language, but you know what? My wife does it with me everyday, and it isn't much easier, especially after she moves to the US.
OP, to put it frankly, your wife came to the US without the intent to integrate into American culture. I can see it from her actions and her life compartmentalization. She wants a Chinese life in the States. There will need to be those compromises between both of you (e.g. the mother-in-law living in an apartment you paid for) and those times where you just look the other way (e.g. me finding kanlangen for my wife when she's sick in the States). But in order to successfully acculturate to the US, your wife also needs to integrate into American society by find a job or hobby that helps her rub shoulders with Americans, and in time, she will come to understand and respect your American ways of living (in America!). She needs to be the one who chooses this path or the ticket home.

I am sorry, but you are actually the wrong one in this. Hypnos is correct.
This has been discussed many times on VJ. I agree, this info needs to be a sticky or somewhere everyone entering with a K-1 can read about it.
overstay = unlawful presence
Getting married within 90 days of entry is what makes you eligible to file for AOS. Being married does not in itself give you legal presence in the US. When the I-94 expires, you are out of status and begin to accrue days of unlawful presence. There is no special category for someone that entered with a K-1. Overstay and being out of status are unlawful presence, period. When you file for AOS, you then enter a new period of authorized stay and the unlawful presence stops accumulating, and does not matter at all once your green card is approved.
It is rare, but someone that entered with a K-1, has an expired I-94 and has not filed for AOS yet can be detained by ICE for unlawful presence. Here is an example > http://www.visajourney.com/forums/topic/485010-please-help-my-husband-was-detained-today/
9 FAM 40.92 N1 INTERPRETATION OF "UNLAWFUL PRESENCE"
a. INA 212(a)(9)(B)(ii) (8 U.S.C. 1182(a)(9)(B)(ii)) provides the following construction for the term "unlawful presence": “… the alien is present in the United States after the expiration of the period of stay authorized by the [secretary of Homeland Security] or is present in the United States without being admitted or paroled." Under this construction, an alien would generally be unlawfully present if he or she entered the United States without inspection, or stayed beyond the date specified on the Form I-94, Arrival and Departure Record, or was found by the Department of Homeland Security (DHS) or an immigration judge or the Board of Immigration Appeals (BIA) to have violated status.

I don't understand why people borrow money for vehicles. Just buy what you can afford. I haven't spent more than $2,400 on a vehicle in 30 years. Then you can put anyone on the title you want. Even a trailer can be titled.

You picked a nice place to live. It's so beautiful there.

WITH CENTS!! I got check-listed because the paralegal rounded it up

Just called in to the NVC, and they gave me my case number and IIN in (just) 24 days!
Gus, the rep that took my call, told me the NVC made some changes within the last few days:
EP (Electronic Processing) is changing to another name, but he did not have the official wording yet. Gus also mentioned that none of the reps are so new that they will not know that they are the same thing Also, some notes: EP is definitely the way to go, as communications with EP take 3-5 working days and snail mail takes 10-20 working days! When an appointment needs to be scheduled, the NVC will schedule the appointment rather than the consulate office (e.g. China for GUZ) in the EP flow. Gus would not promise that this would be faster than the consulate (of course) China applicants are also eligible for EP. I believe it has been mentioned before in the wiki that "For China/GUZ applicants: DO NOT ATTEMPT TO OPTIN PRIOR TO RECEIVING THE DS-3032 EMAIL FROM NVC. DOING SO WILL CAUSE A SEVERE DELAY."

This exact situation happened to me when I gave them all of my Skype logs. My case rotted in the queue for years, and monthly consulate inquiries went unheeded. I agree that OP is sending in too much documentation. Pick and choose the most concise way to represent your case, and be mindful of the recipient.

From someone who has experienced a lot of life, a long "until death did us part" marriage, and has a more mature point of view now with hindsight....
Pick your battles carefully. Not mailing something the date you said is not battle worthy.
Be secure in your relationship or you will be miserable. If you immediately assume she isn't interested in the visa because of not going to the post office then that reeks of insecurity. If you don't really think that, then why the heck bring it up? Find a partner who thinks you are the most wonderful person they could find, and vice-versa. Insecurity leads to suspicion, jealousy, possessiveness and a weak, if not doomed, relationship.
Immigration is not in a hurry. A month is a short time to them. The fact that you paid a huge amount of money to overnight something to the US shows you still think one day matters. So then you get angry because you spent that money, only to have your fiancé delay 4 days. Overnighting the submission to USCIS is another failure to understand that one day is not really worth the cost. Get the application perfect, then settle in for a wait. If petitions dated 6 weeks apart get approved at the same time, USCIS thinks that's normal. Don't feel cheated by seeing people days behind you get approved first.
If you start checking your status daily, you will have daily disappointment. If you check it 10 times a day, you will be disappointed 10 times a day. They email or text you if anything changes. Save yourself some disappointment and the negative emotion it creates.
A needy, depressed fiancée isn't a good life partner. She will be worse as a wife. If she is just pouting to make you feel bad then she is manipulative and high maintenance. Not fun.
I know this isn't what you wanted to hear, but I said it. I believe it.

OP, my Chinese wife has not yet come to the US or even visited, but I've spent almost a full year's worth of time in China over the years we have been in a relationship and now married. This is my 2 cents on what I've learned from my 7 year relationship with my Chinese wife. TL;DR: Your wife and you need to learn how to compromise and respect each other's cultures.
In a multicultural relationship, the very first thing we had to do as a couple was to make the realization that although we are both human beings, we have different cultures and values. I am an American Born Chinese (ABC), and so the culture gap was not as wide, but I still do things in an American way (OMG, soap is not poison!!).
The second step was to accept the differences and concede the small stuff. When I get sick, I'd rather take an ibuprofen than the crapshoot known as kanlangen, which my wife swears by. That's fine, you take your medicine, and I'll take mine. Your mom wants to live with us in our house when you're pregnant? Sorry, not going to happen, but I can compromise by renting her a modest condo or room nearby. Does it cost more cash? Yes, but it shows that I respect her culture (filial piety) while at the same time respecting mine (independence).
Finally, the third step was to integrate each other's cultures as much as possible. I am not great at it, but I'm learning Chinese. In fact, I'm typing this out here in Shanghai on a business trip speaking (bad) Chinese everyday to my coworkers. It's uncomfortable and tiring speaking a foreign language, but you know what? My wife does it with me everyday, and it isn't much easier, especially after she moves to the US.
OP, to put it frankly, your wife came to the US without the intent to integrate into American culture. I can see it from her actions and her life compartmentalization. She wants a Chinese life in the States. There will need to be those compromises between both of you (e.g. the mother-in-law living in an apartment you paid for) and those times where you just look the other way (e.g. me finding kanlangen for my wife when she's sick in the States). But in order to successfully acculturate to the US, your wife also needs to integrate into American society by find a job or hobby that helps her rub shoulders with Americans, and in time, she will come to understand and respect your American ways of living (in America!). She needs to be the one who chooses this path or the ticket home.

You can withdraw your I-360 petition. Vawa Unit is not deporting right now,not even cases of Vawa denial, and then your husband can file form I-130, but keep in mind if later on he becomes abusive again you ruined your chance to have any Vawa case approved.
You didn't ask me but i will give my personal opinion.I am an attorney and I have a non profit organization who helps victims of domestic violence and I assure you if your husband is not doing therapy for at least four months you are risking your life living with him. The odds of an abuser changing are low, VERY LOW. You just know if an abuser changed if he acknolwedged that he was abusive and took full responsibility of the abuse inflicted, he admitted he wanted to change and voluntary entered in some program to address abusive behavior, the program CANNOT be less than 16 weeks,if your husband didn't do any of these things you are doing a big mistake going back with him.
You said "I can save my marriage", it takes two to save a marriage, a commitment from both!.You need to ask yourself if your are safe by his side.

OP, my Chinese wife has not yet come to the US or even visited, but I've spent almost a full year's worth of time in China over the years we have been in a relationship and now married. This is my 2 cents on what I've learned from my 7 year relationship with my Chinese wife. TL;DR: Your wife and you need to learn how to compromise and respect each other's cultures.
In a multicultural relationship, the very first thing we had to do as a couple was to make the realization that although we are both human beings, we have different cultures and values. I am an American Born Chinese (ABC), and so the culture gap was not as wide, but I still do things in an American way (OMG, soap is not poison!!).
The second step was to accept the differences and concede the small stuff. When I get sick, I'd rather take an ibuprofen than the crapshoot known as kanlangen, which my wife swears by. That's fine, you take your medicine, and I'll take mine. Your mom wants to live with us in our house when you're pregnant? Sorry, not going to happen, but I can compromise by renting her a modest condo or room nearby. Does it cost more cash? Yes, but it shows that I respect her culture (filial piety) while at the same time respecting mine (independence).
Finally, the third step was to integrate each other's cultures as much as possible. I am not great at it, but I'm learning Chinese. In fact, I'm typing this out here in Shanghai on a business trip speaking (bad) Chinese everyday to my coworkers. It's uncomfortable and tiring speaking a foreign language, but you know what? My wife does it with me everyday, and it isn't much easier, especially after she moves to the US.
OP, to put it frankly, your wife came to the US without the intent to integrate into American culture. I can see it from her actions and her life compartmentalization. She wants a Chinese life in the States. There will need to be those compromises between both of you (e.g. the mother-in-law living in an apartment you paid for) and those times where you just look the other way (e.g. me finding kanlangen for my wife when she's sick in the States). But in order to successfully acculturate to the US, your wife also needs to integrate into American society by find a job or hobby that helps her rub shoulders with Americans, and in time, she will come to understand and respect your American ways of living (in America!). She needs to be the one who chooses this path or the ticket home.

OP, my Chinese wife has not yet come to the US or even visited, but I've spent almost a full year's worth of time in China over the years we have been in a relationship and now married. This is my 2 cents on what I've learned from my 7 year relationship with my Chinese wife. TL;DR: Your wife and you need to learn how to compromise and respect each other's cultures.
In a multicultural relationship, the very first thing we had to do as a couple was to make the realization that although we are both human beings, we have different cultures and values. I am an American Born Chinese (ABC), and so the culture gap was not as wide, but I still do things in an American way (OMG, soap is not poison!!).
The second step was to accept the differences and concede the small stuff. When I get sick, I'd rather take an ibuprofen than the crapshoot known as kanlangen, which my wife swears by. That's fine, you take your medicine, and I'll take mine. Your mom wants to live with us in our house when you're pregnant? Sorry, not going to happen, but I can compromise by renting her a modest condo or room nearby. Does it cost more cash? Yes, but it shows that I respect her culture (filial piety) while at the same time respecting mine (independence).
Finally, the third step was to integrate each other's cultures as much as possible. I am not great at it, but I'm learning Chinese. In fact, I'm typing this out here in Shanghai on a business trip speaking (bad) Chinese everyday to my coworkers. It's uncomfortable and tiring speaking a foreign language, but you know what? My wife does it with me everyday, and it isn't much easier, especially after she moves to the US.
OP, to put it frankly, your wife came to the US without the intent to integrate into American culture. I can see it from her actions and her life compartmentalization. She wants a Chinese life in the States. There will need to be those compromises between both of you (e.g. the mother-in-law living in an apartment you paid for) and those times where you just look the other way (e.g. me finding kanlangen for my wife when she's sick in the States). But in order to successfully acculturate to the US, your wife also needs to integrate into American society by find a job or hobby that helps her rub shoulders with Americans, and in time, she will come to understand and respect your American ways of living (in America!). She needs to be the one who chooses this path or the ticket home.

OP, my Chinese wife has not yet come to the US or even visited, but I've spent almost a full year's worth of time in China over the years we have been in a relationship and now married. This is my 2 cents on what I've learned from my 7 year relationship with my Chinese wife. TL;DR: Your wife and you need to learn how to compromise and respect each other's cultures.
In a multicultural relationship, the very first thing we had to do as a couple was to make the realization that although we are both human beings, we have different cultures and values. I am an American Born Chinese (ABC), and so the culture gap was not as wide, but I still do things in an American way (OMG, soap is not poison!!).
The second step was to accept the differences and concede the small stuff. When I get sick, I'd rather take an ibuprofen than the crapshoot known as kanlangen, which my wife swears by. That's fine, you take your medicine, and I'll take mine. Your mom wants to live with us in our house when you're pregnant? Sorry, not going to happen, but I can compromise by renting her a modest condo or room nearby. Does it cost more cash? Yes, but it shows that I respect her culture (filial piety) while at the same time respecting mine (independence).
Finally, the third step was to integrate each other's cultures as much as possible. I am not great at it, but I'm learning Chinese. In fact, I'm typing this out here in Shanghai on a business trip speaking (bad) Chinese everyday to my coworkers. It's uncomfortable and tiring speaking a foreign language, but you know what? My wife does it with me everyday, and it isn't much easier, especially after she moves to the US.
OP, to put it frankly, your wife came to the US without the intent to integrate into American culture. I can see it from her actions and her life compartmentalization. She wants a Chinese life in the States. There will need to be those compromises between both of you (e.g. the mother-in-law living in an apartment you paid for) and those times where you just look the other way (e.g. me finding kanlangen for my wife when she's sick in the States). But in order to successfully acculturate to the US, your wife also needs to integrate into American society by find a job or hobby that helps her rub shoulders with Americans, and in time, she will come to understand and respect your American ways of living (in America!). She needs to be the one who chooses this path or the ticket home.

OP, my Chinese wife has not yet come to the US or even visited, but I've spent almost a full year's worth of time in China over the years we have been in a relationship and now married. This is my 2 cents on what I've learned from my 7 year relationship with my Chinese wife. TL;DR: Your wife and you need to learn how to compromise and respect each other's cultures.
In a multicultural relationship, the very first thing we had to do as a couple was to make the realization that although we are both human beings, we have different cultures and values. I am an American Born Chinese (ABC), and so the culture gap was not as wide, but I still do things in an American way (OMG, soap is not poison!!).
The second step was to accept the differences and concede the small stuff. When I get sick, I'd rather take an ibuprofen than the crapshoot known as kanlangen, which my wife swears by. That's fine, you take your medicine, and I'll take mine. Your mom wants to live with us in our house when you're pregnant? Sorry, not going to happen, but I can compromise by renting her a modest condo or room nearby. Does it cost more cash? Yes, but it shows that I respect her culture (filial piety) while at the same time respecting mine (independence).
Finally, the third step was to integrate each other's cultures as much as possible. I am not great at it, but I'm learning Chinese. In fact, I'm typing this out here in Shanghai on a business trip speaking (bad) Chinese everyday to my coworkers. It's uncomfortable and tiring speaking a foreign language, but you know what? My wife does it with me everyday, and it isn't much easier, especially after she moves to the US.
OP, to put it frankly, your wife came to the US without the intent to integrate into American culture. I can see it from her actions and her life compartmentalization. She wants a Chinese life in the States. There will need to be those compromises between both of you (e.g. the mother-in-law living in an apartment you paid for) and those times where you just look the other way (e.g. me finding kanlangen for my wife when she's sick in the States). But in order to successfully acculturate to the US, your wife also needs to integrate into American society by find a job or hobby that helps her rub shoulders with Americans, and in time, she will come to understand and respect your American ways of living (in America!). She needs to be the one who chooses this path or the ticket home.

OP, my Chinese wife has not yet come to the US or even visited, but I've spent almost a full year's worth of time in China over the years we have been in a relationship and now married. This is my 2 cents on what I've learned from my 7 year relationship with my Chinese wife. TL;DR: Your wife and you need to learn how to compromise and respect each other's cultures.
In a multicultural relationship, the very first thing we had to do as a couple was to make the realization that although we are both human beings, we have different cultures and values. I am an American Born Chinese (ABC), and so the culture gap was not as wide, but I still do things in an American way (OMG, soap is not poison!!).
The second step was to accept the differences and concede the small stuff. When I get sick, I'd rather take an ibuprofen than the crapshoot known as kanlangen, which my wife swears by. That's fine, you take your medicine, and I'll take mine. Your mom wants to live with us in our house when you're pregnant? Sorry, not going to happen, but I can compromise by renting her a modest condo or room nearby. Does it cost more cash? Yes, but it shows that I respect her culture (filial piety) while at the same time respecting mine (independence).
Finally, the third step was to integrate each other's cultures as much as possible. I am not great at it, but I'm learning Chinese. In fact, I'm typing this out here in Shanghai on a business trip speaking (bad) Chinese everyday to my coworkers. It's uncomfortable and tiring speaking a foreign language, but you know what? My wife does it with me everyday, and it isn't much easier, especially after she moves to the US.
OP, to put it frankly, your wife came to the US without the intent to integrate into American culture. I can see it from her actions and her life compartmentalization. She wants a Chinese life in the States. There will need to be those compromises between both of you (e.g. the mother-in-law living in an apartment you paid for) and those times where you just look the other way (e.g. me finding kanlangen for my wife when she's sick in the States). But in order to successfully acculturate to the US, your wife also needs to integrate into American society by find a job or hobby that helps her rub shoulders with Americans, and in time, she will come to understand and respect your American ways of living (in America!). She needs to be the one who chooses this path or the ticket home.

OP, my Chinese wife has not yet come to the US or even visited, but I've spent almost a full year's worth of time in China over the years we have been in a relationship and now married. This is my 2 cents on what I've learned from my 7 year relationship with my Chinese wife. TL;DR: Your wife and you need to learn how to compromise and respect each other's cultures.
In a multicultural relationship, the very first thing we had to do as a couple was to make the realization that although we are both human beings, we have different cultures and values. I am an American Born Chinese (ABC), and so the culture gap was not as wide, but I still do things in an American way (OMG, soap is not poison!!).
The second step was to accept the differences and concede the small stuff. When I get sick, I'd rather take an ibuprofen than the crapshoot known as kanlangen, which my wife swears by. That's fine, you take your medicine, and I'll take mine. Your mom wants to live with us in our house when you're pregnant? Sorry, not going to happen, but I can compromise by renting her a modest condo or room nearby. Does it cost more cash? Yes, but it shows that I respect her culture (filial piety) while at the same time respecting mine (independence).
Finally, the third step was to integrate each other's cultures as much as possible. I am not great at it, but I'm learning Chinese. In fact, I'm typing this out here in Shanghai on a business trip speaking (bad) Chinese everyday to my coworkers. It's uncomfortable and tiring speaking a foreign language, but you know what? My wife does it with me everyday, and it isn't much easier, especially after she moves to the US.
OP, to put it frankly, your wife came to the US without the intent to integrate into American culture. I can see it from her actions and her life compartmentalization. She wants a Chinese life in the States. There will need to be those compromises between both of you (e.g. the mother-in-law living in an apartment you paid for) and those times where you just look the other way (e.g. me finding kanlangen for my wife when she's sick in the States). But in order to successfully acculturate to the US, your wife also needs to integrate into American society by find a job or hobby that helps her rub shoulders with Americans, and in time, she will come to understand and respect your American ways of living (in America!). She needs to be the one who chooses this path or the ticket home.

OP, my Chinese wife has not yet come to the US or even visited, but I've spent almost a full year's worth of time in China over the years we have been in a relationship and now married. This is my 2 cents on what I've learned from my 7 year relationship with my Chinese wife. TL;DR: Your wife and you need to learn how to compromise and respect each other's cultures.
In a multicultural relationship, the very first thing we had to do as a couple was to make the realization that although we are both human beings, we have different cultures and values. I am an American Born Chinese (ABC), and so the culture gap was not as wide, but I still do things in an American way (OMG, soap is not poison!!).
The second step was to accept the differences and concede the small stuff. When I get sick, I'd rather take an ibuprofen than the crapshoot known as kanlangen, which my wife swears by. That's fine, you take your medicine, and I'll take mine. Your mom wants to live with us in our house when you're pregnant? Sorry, not going to happen, but I can compromise by renting her a modest condo or room nearby. Does it cost more cash? Yes, but it shows that I respect her culture (filial piety) while at the same time respecting mine (independence).
Finally, the third step was to integrate each other's cultures as much as possible. I am not great at it, but I'm learning Chinese. In fact, I'm typing this out here in Shanghai on a business trip speaking (bad) Chinese everyday to my coworkers. It's uncomfortable and tiring speaking a foreign language, but you know what? My wife does it with me everyday, and it isn't much easier, especially after she moves to the US.
OP, to put it frankly, your wife came to the US without the intent to integrate into American culture. I can see it from her actions and her life compartmentalization. She wants a Chinese life in the States. There will need to be those compromises between both of you (e.g. the mother-in-law living in an apartment you paid for) and those times where you just look the other way (e.g. me finding kanlangen for my wife when she's sick in the States). But in order to successfully acculturate to the US, your wife also needs to integrate into American society by find a job or hobby that helps her rub shoulders with Americans, and in time, she will come to understand and respect your American ways of living (in America!). She needs to be the one who chooses this path or the ticket home.

OP, my Chinese wife has not yet come to the US or even visited, but I've spent almost a full year's worth of time in China over the years we have been in a relationship and now married. This is my 2 cents on what I've learned from my 7 year relationship with my Chinese wife. TL;DR: Your wife and you need to learn how to compromise and respect each other's cultures.
In a multicultural relationship, the very first thing we had to do as a couple was to make the realization that although we are both human beings, we have different cultures and values. I am an American Born Chinese (ABC), and so the culture gap was not as wide, but I still do things in an American way (OMG, soap is not poison!!).
The second step was to accept the differences and concede the small stuff. When I get sick, I'd rather take an ibuprofen than the crapshoot known as kanlangen, which my wife swears by. That's fine, you take your medicine, and I'll take mine. Your mom wants to live with us in our house when you're pregnant? Sorry, not going to happen, but I can compromise by renting her a modest condo or room nearby. Does it cost more cash? Yes, but it shows that I respect her culture (filial piety) while at the same time respecting mine (independence).
Finally, the third step was to integrate each other's cultures as much as possible. I am not great at it, but I'm learning Chinese. In fact, I'm typing this out here in Shanghai on a business trip speaking (bad) Chinese everyday to my coworkers. It's uncomfortable and tiring speaking a foreign language, but you know what? My wife does it with me everyday, and it isn't much easier, especially after she moves to the US.
OP, to put it frankly, your wife came to the US without the intent to integrate into American culture. I can see it from her actions and her life compartmentalization. She wants a Chinese life in the States. There will need to be those compromises between both of you (e.g. the mother-in-law living in an apartment you paid for) and those times where you just look the other way (e.g. me finding kanlangen for my wife when she's sick in the States). But in order to successfully acculturate to the US, your wife also needs to integrate into American society by find a job or hobby that helps her rub shoulders with Americans, and in time, she will come to understand and respect your American ways of living (in America!). She needs to be the one who chooses this path or the ticket home.

OP, my Chinese wife has not yet come to the US or even visited, but I've spent almost a full year's worth of time in China over the years we have been in a relationship and now married. This is my 2 cents on what I've learned from my 7 year relationship with my Chinese wife. TL;DR: Your wife and you need to learn how to compromise and respect each other's cultures.
In a multicultural relationship, the very first thing we had to do as a couple was to make the realization that although we are both human beings, we have different cultures and values. I am an American Born Chinese (ABC), and so the culture gap was not as wide, but I still do things in an American way (OMG, soap is not poison!!).
The second step was to accept the differences and concede the small stuff. When I get sick, I'd rather take an ibuprofen than the crapshoot known as kanlangen, which my wife swears by. That's fine, you take your medicine, and I'll take mine. Your mom wants to live with us in our house when you're pregnant? Sorry, not going to happen, but I can compromise by renting her a modest condo or room nearby. Does it cost more cash? Yes, but it shows that I respect her culture (filial piety) while at the same time respecting mine (independence).
Finally, the third step was to integrate each other's cultures as much as possible. I am not great at it, but I'm learning Chinese. In fact, I'm typing this out here in Shanghai on a business trip speaking (bad) Chinese everyday to my coworkers. It's uncomfortable and tiring speaking a foreign language, but you know what? My wife does it with me everyday, and it isn't much easier, especially after she moves to the US.
OP, to put it frankly, your wife came to the US without the intent to integrate into American culture. I can see it from her actions and her life compartmentalization. She wants a Chinese life in the States. There will need to be those compromises between both of you (e.g. the mother-in-law living in an apartment you paid for) and those times where you just look the other way (e.g. me finding kanlangen for my wife when she's sick in the States). But in order to successfully acculturate to the US, your wife also needs to integrate into American society by find a job or hobby that helps her rub shoulders with Americans, and in time, she will come to understand and respect your American ways of living (in America!). She needs to be the one who chooses this path or the ticket home.

OP, my Chinese wife has not yet come to the US or even visited, but I've spent almost a full year's worth of time in China over the years we have been in a relationship and now married. This is my 2 cents on what I've learned from my 7 year relationship with my Chinese wife. TL;DR: Your wife and you need to learn how to compromise and respect each other's cultures.
In a multicultural relationship, the very first thing we had to do as a couple was to make the realization that although we are both human beings, we have different cultures and values. I am an American Born Chinese (ABC), and so the culture gap was not as wide, but I still do things in an American way (OMG, soap is not poison!!).
The second step was to accept the differences and concede the small stuff. When I get sick, I'd rather take an ibuprofen than the crapshoot known as kanlangen, which my wife swears by. That's fine, you take your medicine, and I'll take mine. Your mom wants to live with us in our house when you're pregnant? Sorry, not going to happen, but I can compromise by renting her a modest condo or room nearby. Does it cost more cash? Yes, but it shows that I respect her culture (filial piety) while at the same time respecting mine (independence).
Finally, the third step was to integrate each other's cultures as much as possible. I am not great at it, but I'm learning Chinese. In fact, I'm typing this out here in Shanghai on a business trip speaking (bad) Chinese everyday to my coworkers. It's uncomfortable and tiring speaking a foreign language, but you know what? My wife does it with me everyday, and it isn't much easier, especially after she moves to the US.
OP, to put it frankly, your wife came to the US without the intent to integrate into American culture. I can see it from her actions and her life compartmentalization. She wants a Chinese life in the States. There will need to be those compromises between both of you (e.g. the mother-in-law living in an apartment you paid for) and those times where you just look the other way (e.g. me finding kanlangen for my wife when she's sick in the States). But in order to successfully acculturate to the US, your wife also needs to integrate into American society by find a job or hobby that helps her rub shoulders with Americans, and in time, she will come to understand and respect your American ways of living (in America!). She needs to be the one who chooses this path or the ticket home.

OP, my Chinese wife has not yet come to the US or even visited, but I've spent almost a full year's worth of time in China over the years we have been in a relationship and now married. This is my 2 cents on what I've learned from my 7 year relationship with my Chinese wife. TL;DR: Your wife and you need to learn how to compromise and respect each other's cultures.
In a multicultural relationship, the very first thing we had to do as a couple was to make the realization that although we are both human beings, we have different cultures and values. I am an American Born Chinese (ABC), and so the culture gap was not as wide, but I still do things in an American way (OMG, soap is not poison!!).
The second step was to accept the differences and concede the small stuff. When I get sick, I'd rather take an ibuprofen than the crapshoot known as kanlangen, which my wife swears by. That's fine, you take your medicine, and I'll take mine. Your mom wants to live with us in our house when you're pregnant? Sorry, not going to happen, but I can compromise by renting her a modest condo or room nearby. Does it cost more cash? Yes, but it shows that I respect her culture (filial piety) while at the same time respecting mine (independence).
Finally, the third step was to integrate each other's cultures as much as possible. I am not great at it, but I'm learning Chinese. In fact, I'm typing this out here in Shanghai on a business trip speaking (bad) Chinese everyday to my coworkers. It's uncomfortable and tiring speaking a foreign language, but you know what? My wife does it with me everyday, and it isn't much easier, especially after she moves to the US.
OP, to put it frankly, your wife came to the US without the intent to integrate into American culture. I can see it from her actions and her life compartmentalization. She wants a Chinese life in the States. There will need to be those compromises between both of you (e.g. the mother-in-law living in an apartment you paid for) and those times where you just look the other way (e.g. me finding kanlangen for my wife when she's sick in the States). But in order to successfully acculturate to the US, your wife also needs to integrate into American society by find a job or hobby that helps her rub shoulders with Americans, and in time, she will come to understand and respect your American ways of living (in America!). She needs to be the one who chooses this path or the ticket home.

OP, my Chinese wife has not yet come to the US or even visited, but I've spent almost a full year's worth of time in China over the years we have been in a relationship and now married. This is my 2 cents on what I've learned from my 7 year relationship with my Chinese wife. TL;DR: Your wife and you need to learn how to compromise and respect each other's cultures.
In a multicultural relationship, the very first thing we had to do as a couple was to make the realization that although we are both human beings, we have different cultures and values. I am an American Born Chinese (ABC), and so the culture gap was not as wide, but I still do things in an American way (OMG, soap is not poison!!).
The second step was to accept the differences and concede the small stuff. When I get sick, I'd rather take an ibuprofen than the crapshoot known as kanlangen, which my wife swears by. That's fine, you take your medicine, and I'll take mine. Your mom wants to live with us in our house when you're pregnant? Sorry, not going to happen, but I can compromise by renting her a modest condo or room nearby. Does it cost more cash? Yes, but it shows that I respect her culture (filial piety) while at the same time respecting mine (independence).
Finally, the third step was to integrate each other's cultures as much as possible. I am not great at it, but I'm learning Chinese. In fact, I'm typing this out here in Shanghai on a business trip speaking (bad) Chinese everyday to my coworkers. It's uncomfortable and tiring speaking a foreign language, but you know what? My wife does it with me everyday, and it isn't much easier, especially after she moves to the US.
OP, to put it frankly, your wife came to the US without the intent to integrate into American culture. I can see it from her actions and her life compartmentalization. She wants a Chinese life in the States. There will need to be those compromises between both of you (e.g. the mother-in-law living in an apartment you paid for) and those times where you just look the other way (e.g. me finding kanlangen for my wife when she's sick in the States). But in order to successfully acculturate to the US, your wife also needs to integrate into American society by find a job or hobby that helps her rub shoulders with Americans, and in time, she will come to understand and respect your American ways of living (in America!). She needs to be the one who chooses this path or the ticket home.

OP, my Chinese wife has not yet come to the US or even visited, but I've spent almost a full year's worth of time in China over the years we have been in a relationship and now married. This is my 2 cents on what I've learned from my 7 year relationship with my Chinese wife. TL;DR: Your wife and you need to learn how to compromise and respect each other's cultures.
In a multicultural relationship, the very first thing we had to do as a couple was to make the realization that although we are both human beings, we have different cultures and values. I am an American Born Chinese (ABC), and so the culture gap was not as wide, but I still do things in an American way (OMG, soap is not poison!!).
The second step was to accept the differences and concede the small stuff. When I get sick, I'd rather take an ibuprofen than the crapshoot known as kanlangen, which my wife swears by. That's fine, you take your medicine, and I'll take mine. Your mom wants to live with us in our house when you're pregnant? Sorry, not going to happen, but I can compromise by renting her a modest condo or room nearby. Does it cost more cash? Yes, but it shows that I respect her culture (filial piety) while at the same time respecting mine (independence).
Finally, the third step was to integrate each other's cultures as much as possible. I am not great at it, but I'm learning Chinese. In fact, I'm typing this out here in Shanghai on a business trip speaking (bad) Chinese everyday to my coworkers. It's uncomfortable and tiring speaking a foreign language, but you know what? My wife does it with me everyday, and it isn't much easier, especially after she moves to the US.
OP, to put it frankly, your wife came to the US without the intent to integrate into American culture. I can see it from her actions and her life compartmentalization. She wants a Chinese life in the States. There will need to be those compromises between both of you (e.g. the mother-in-law living in an apartment you paid for) and those times where you just look the other way (e.g. me finding kanlangen for my wife when she's sick in the States). But in order to successfully acculturate to the US, your wife also needs to integrate into American society by find a job or hobby that helps her rub shoulders with Americans, and in time, she will come to understand and respect your American ways of living (in America!). She needs to be the one who chooses this path or the ticket home.