Ridiculous Employers

[Cassandra+Yuibi 0]

So, on Monday I put in my two weeks notice at my workplace. Why? Well, here's a brief backstory.

I'm am/was an Assistant Store Manager at a retail company. When I was interviewed a year ago to work at the company I made my situation with my fiance known, saying I would be taking time of at certain times to visit him or take care of things. Well, at that time that was fine and well. Now, fast forward to a few weeks ago. I spoke with a higher up in my company a few weeks ago about taking a week off to visit my fiance (our petition has been in serious limbo). After all, in my position I'm allowed 2 weeks paid and 8 weeks unpaid vacation- I've used none of that time. He told me that was fine, and that I just need to let him know when I decided when I wanted the time.

I had a visit Monday from my Area Manager (lower than District Manager). I have a history with her conveniently not getting paperwork done that I needed (and her getting in trouble with higher ups for it). She comes in and tells me that she believes that my situation with immigration is affecting how I'm performing at work (even though my sales,etc. are by far higher than everyone else in my store). She also tells me that she won't allow me to take the time off to visit my fiance (which was already approved by someone above her). And then she tells me that I have to make a decision. I have to decide whether my job or my family/fiance is more important and I have 24 hrs to give her my decision.

Of course, you know what I chose- and I have no idea how anyone could choose a job (a low paying one at that) over their family/spouse/fiance.

I'm just fuming over the situation. Wondering if anyone else has had/heard of a similair situation where someone was told to choose between a job or their family? That seems just so... unethical to me.

[Pinocchio Liberal 268]

Getting special circumstances on paper is always a good idea. Since your sales numbers are good go to work for the competition. You to have a say in this game your punk boss is playin. Put that fumin to work for yourself.

[Cassandra+Yuibi 0]

Getting special circumstances on paper is always a good idea. Since your sales numbers are good go to work for the competition. You to have a say in this game your punk boss is playin. Put that fumin to work for yourself.

Thats not the only thing that has happened. It's just the straw that broke the camels back; therefore, I'm GLAD I have an opportunity to find another job.

My question was not, "do you think this was a good idea" because nobody on VJ has full insight in what goes on at my workplace, that's a stupid question. I was simply curious, as I stated, if anyone else had had a similair situation where they were faced with chosing a job or family.

[Pinocchio Liberal 268]

Getting special circumstances on paper is always a good idea. Since your sales numbers are good go to work for the competition. You to have a say in this game your punk boss is playin. Put that fumin to work for yourself.

Thats not the only thing that has happened. It's just the straw that broke the camels back; therefore, I'm GLAD I have an opportunity to find another job.

My question was not, "do you think this was a good idea" because nobody on VJ has full insight in what goes on at my workplace, that's a stupid question. I was simply curious, as I stated, if anyone else had had a similair situation where they were faced with chosing a job or family.

Its getting late.

[Hilarious Clinton 452]

Don't share personal business with your bosses. Sure... you're just trying to be helpful, but look where it gets you. People can be jealous and petty. I speak from experience.

[Ron/Sharon 0]

It sure sounds like you were working for WalMart to me.

My situation is much better than yours. I told my boss about the immigration petition from day one and the estimated time of one year from beginning to end., that was in September of 06. In August of 07 we were denied the visa and I told the boss about that and even though I was moved into a different area to work on the petition for the supposed year it would take the boss is now leaving me there, not telling me that I need to find employment elsewhere. HAving the support of management and staff has been a great support to us through the whole process and have been given the time off I needed when it was needed even the last time which I gave two days notice that I had to leave right away, they had known I was going to be going for the past four months just not the exact date. I wish you were working for a group of people like the ones I have been blessed to work with. I hope your next job is with a much better company, the good thing is you won't have to work under that ignorant manager again.

[one...two...tree 2,762]

Don't share personal business with your bosses. Sure... you're just trying to be helpful, but look where it gets you. People can be jealous and petty. I speak from experience.

Totally agree, although if it's a smaller company it's difficult not to keep your private life, private.

...

As for the way you were treated - retail jobs are like that. Even if you're in a management position, you are considered expendible. Working in retail is what motivated me to finish college so I'd never have to go through the way I was treated by both management and customers. Take it as a lessoned learn and don't look back.

[Heracles 417]

I did not think bosses like that still existed. Especially using the it's your choice comment. Leaving that sort of environment is much better in the long run.. I would also document as much as you can and send it to their managers. Keep the letter on a professional level so they don't take it as a disgruntled employee complaining.

Edited September 21, 2007 by Boo-Yah!

[Jasman0717 8]

Don't share personal business with your bosses. Sure... you're just trying to be helpful, but look where it gets you. People can be jealous and petty. I speak from experience.

Very good point

[Ban Hammer 12,899]

So, on Monday I put in my two weeks notice at my workplace. Why? Well, here's a brief backstory.

I'm am/was an Assistant Store Manager at a retail company. When I was interviewed a year ago to work at the company I made my situation with my fiance known, saying I would be taking time of at certain times to visit him or take care of things. Well, at that time that was fine and well. Now, fast forward to a few weeks ago. I spoke with a higher up in my company a few weeks ago about taking a week off to visit my fiance (our petition has been in serious limbo). After all, in my position I'm allowed 2 weeks paid and 8 weeks unpaid vacation- I've used none of that time. He told me that was fine, and that I just need to let him know when I decided when I wanted the time.

I had a visit Monday from my Area Manager (lower than District Manager). I have a history with her conveniently not getting paperwork done that I needed (and her getting in trouble with higher ups for it). She comes in and tells me that she believes that my situation with immigration is affecting how I'm performing at work (even though my sales,etc. are by far higher than everyone else in my store). She also tells me that she won't allow me to take the time off to visit my fiance (which was already approved by someone above her). And then she tells me that I have to make a decision. I have to decide whether my job or my family/fiance is more important and I have 24 hrs to give her my decision.

Of course, you know what I chose- and I have no idea how anyone could choose a job (a low paying one at that) over their family/spouse/fiance.

I'm just fuming over the situation. Wondering if anyone else has had/heard of a similair situation where someone was told to choose between a job or their family? That seems just so... unethical to me.

my observations:

1- as your leave was approved by higher than her, she can suck it up. she cannot deny you vacation time without a valid reason and as it's been approved by someone further up the food chain than her, she's pizzing in the wind. if you push the issue with her "not allowing you to take time off" she'll get her hands slapped by higher at a minimum - this may well be the incident higher is looking for to fire her! let the district manager know you may be subject to discriminatory practices by the area manager and provide documentation: transcript of the conversation between yourself and the area manager - what was said, where the convo took place, date and time, witnesses if any.

2- your area manager sounds like she's reached her incompetence peak and she's a chopfck.

3- keep your private life private. there is really no need for anyone at work to know about the visa process or that you needed time off to visit your so. if you'd said you wanted to go fishing for 2 weeks would anyone have made an issue of it?

[LondonGooner 0]

I've just finished reading the Nanny Diaries and I am currently half-way through the Devil Wears Prada. (I am comfortable enough in my masculinity to read chick-lit although, I do use my Man Card as a bookmark). I've worked for several really bad bosses, one of which was a high-ranking Air Force Officer who had a serious case of small man complex. I worked as a P/A for this guy even though he really didn't need one but he loved the fact that the rank he held entitled him to one. My daily routine basically involved sitting at my desk outside his office reading whatever I brought into work with me. My job description stated that I would perform a veriety of office based functions for him such as preparing presentations, typing, running errands, etc, etc. Instead my job amounted to nothing more than making him endless cups of tea and answering the phone in my office this was in spite of my practically begging him and the rest of his staff to give me some actual work to do. I guess my situation could have been more demeaning such as the experiences suffered by the main characters in thos books I am reading. In the end I may a decision to quit the job for the sake of my long-term sanity. At the time I really regretted it because I loved the Air Force environment and wanted to go higher in the civil service but I ended up working for the police in a much better job with real work and challenges suited to my skills. So I guess what I am saying is that although it seems ####### at the time things have a habit of falling into place and working themselves out.

[Kathryn41 3,205]

(quote: "At the time I really regretted it because I loved the Air Force environment and wanted to go higher in the civil service but I ended up working for the police in a much better job with real work and challenges suited to my skills. So I guess what I am saying is that although it seems ####### at the time things have a habit of falling into place and working themselves out."quote)

I am sorry you are working for such short-sighted individuals - it adds an additional level of frustration to an already frustrating enough process. Your immediate employer was definitely out of line even if she might have had the right, technically. Sometimes the most important lesson about power people can learn is 'just because you can do something, doesn't mean you should do something'. It does sound to me like she was using this as an opportunity to force you to abide by her standards, and perhaps didn't expect you to choose your fiance over your job. The fact that you did - and your sales record is so good - may well come back to haunt her. (One quick observation - it seems like a lot of US employers have yet to learn that their employees are one of their most valuable resources - and the better you treat your employees the better work they do for you).

I have had a few ####### employers over the years as well including one slave driver who heaped verbal abuse about me and everyone else he knew on me during the day, complained about every bit of work I did no matter how good (and it was good) all for minimum wage, and called me ungrateful when I quit and found a better job. There is no satisfying some people, so it is important that you are honest to yourself and your own best interests. Finding another job that is more satisfying - and if you wanted to go to the opposition with your services there would be some sort of psychological satisfaction in that as well - is the best 'revenge' you can take. Like the bit quoted above, I have almost always found when I took the initiative to change something that wasn't working, even when it looked hopeless, I always landed on my feet in a better job and better circumstances than I had before. I suspect you will find the same thing happens with you.

Good luck.

Edited September 21, 2007 by Kathryn41

[Jimmy and Angela 0]

There are millions of ways to earn money in this country and that is just one of them ..... move on to something better

[perfect 39]

Sounds to me like you may have grounds for legal recourse. Retaliation? Discrimination? Professional embarassment? Look at employment law in your state. Unless there were failings previously documented in your reviews etc they cannot terminate for the reason that they stated. Could have a case for constructive dismissal or other if you wanted to go that route.

My employers are one of those who regularly abuse employees. Recently they tried to demote me and stated that this was a decision that had already been made and was not up for discussion, even though I have never had a bad review and even though it was clear that this was retaliation for the fact that I reported what really goes on in their expense reports which is tantamount to stealing. I wrote a considered, legally-worded letter stating why they were unjustified in doing so, how I could prove their claims incorrect and that it constituted discrimination, retaliation and professional embarassment as well as potentially harming my ability to obtain employment in the future at my current level and as soon as they smelled even the possibility of a law suit they couldn't reverse their decision quickly enough. Now they are ten times more careful how they deal with me!

Edited September 21, 2007 by perfect

[JODO 2]

There are millions of ways to earn money in this country and that is just one of them ..... move on to something better