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My fiancee decided to break up with me, all in a sudden, the day before he was normal and then surprise.

I can't believe he came to Italy and proposed to me, celebrated with my family and then he left me. We were so close to finally be together.


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Omg... I´m so sorry... But try to look at the positive side... Better before you guys get married than after... Someone who suddenly does this kind of decision don´t worth to have a strong and nice story with someone...

Call your friends, go for a drink, entertain yourself a little bit... It will help you a little ;)

Be fine...

All the best!



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Sorry to hear this news. The best post breakup advice I ever heard was from a friend who told me to get away from the relationship for a month or two. Don't reach out to the ex for awhile and limit any communication initiated by him as you sort out your feelings and engage in activities that take your mind off of this news. Once you have some distance and time away from the relationship, you'll have better perspective to re-engage if you or he should want to begin communications again. Take care.

Marriage: 2014-02-23 - Colombia    ROC interview/completed: 2018-08-16 - Albuquerque
CR1 started : 2014-06-06           N400 started: 2018-04-24
CR1 completed/POE : 2015-07-13     N400 interview: 2018-08-16 - Albuquerque
ROC started : 2017-04-14 CSC     Oath ceremony: 2018-09-24 – Santa Fe

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cupcake, I know it hurts like hell now, and it will for quite some time. Being dumped by someone you love, someone with whom you had plans and dreams, can feel humiliating and like your heart has been torn to pieces. But he did you a real favour -- better now than five years down the road when it will be more painful and much harder to bounce back from. You are still your good, wonderful self. Your family and friends still love you and will be there to give you the support you need and importantly they will not judge you.

Take some time to be away from all of this. Don't contact him. Don't take his calls. Don't spend hours mooning over your old texts and emails. Focus on yourself, and all of the things that make you the lovely person that you are. You will find love again, if you wish, and when the time is right think about what you learned from this relationship.

As they say, living well is the best revenge. Live your life well, to the fullest, and for the people whom you love and who love you. I wish you peace in the weeks to come. (L)(L)(L)

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The posts above, most especially Killary's, merit enshrinement in the pantheon of All-Time Greatest VJ Posts.

He has indeed done you a favor, and he's saved you a lot of time. Don't even think about how much more difficult and heartbreaking this would have been had you relocated and married.

Do exactly what the earlier posters have recommended. Keep the faith.

06-04-2007 = TSC stamps postal return-receipt for I-129f.

06-11-2007 = NOA1 date (unknown to me).

07-20-2007 = Phoned Immigration Officer; got WAC#; where's NOA1?

09-25-2007 = Touch (first-ever).

09-28-2007 = NOA1, 23 days after their 45-day promise to send it (grrrr).

10-20 & 11-14-2007 = Phoned ImmOffs; "still pending."

12-11-2007 = 180 days; file is "between workstations, may be early Jan."; touches 12/11 & 12/12.

12-18-2007 = Call; file is with Division 9 ofcr. (bckgrnd check); e-prompt to shake it; touch.

12-19-2007 = NOA2 by e-mail & web, dated 12-18-07 (187 days; 201 per VJ); in mail 12/24/07.

01-09-2008 = File from USCIS to NVC, 1-4-08; NVC creates file, 1/15/08; to consulate 1/16/08.

01-23-2008 = Consulate gets file; outdated Packet 4 mailed to fiancee 1/27/08; rec'd 3/3/08.

04-29-2008 = Fiancee's 4-min. consular interview, 8:30 a.m.; much evidence brought but not allowed to be presented (consul: "More proof! Second interview! Bring your fiance!").

05-05-2008 = Infuriating $12 call to non-English-speaking consulate appointment-setter.

05-06-2008 = Better $12 call to English-speaker; "joint" interview date 6/30/08 (my selection).

06-30-2008 = Stokes Interrogations w/Ecuadorian (not USC); "wait 2 weeks; we'll mail her."

07-2008 = Daily calls to DOS: "currently processing"; 8/05 = Phoned consulate, got Section Chief; wrote him.

08-07-08 = E-mail from consulate, promising to issue visa "as soon as we get her passport" (on 8/12, per DHL).

08-27-08 = Phoned consulate (they "couldn't find" our file); visa DHL'd 8/28; in hand 9/1; through POE on 10/9 with NO hassles(!).

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