Nervous about the interview..

[NewYork2014 9]

Hi,

Long story short.. My mom brought me here when I was 14, we came through legally everything was all fine and dandy until I turned 18 and learned she never adjusted neither her or my status. I went to school, college and through the motions without ever having an ID or a drivers license, etc. Moving forward, I met my wife when I was 23, we dated 8 years (yes, 8 years) until we finally got married last year. She is now pregnant and insists I must lead a normal life and apply for my documents. My mother always instilled fear in me "They will kick you out!" yadda yadda.. hence why I had never tried to adjust my status, I actually had no grounds to adjust it as I wasn't married and my wife would've never married me for this purpose (her parents would've killed me, in fact they almost caused us to break up because I had no papers, "he's going no where", etc.) with the grace of God I was able to work (I still have a SS# from my mothers attempt when I was 14, one which I had been working and paying taxes with for over 5 years). Anyway..

We filed for an AOS (the whole package) last year, about 6 months after we were married.

The EAD came through, I went to the SS office, asked for a replacement card (not a apply for new one, since I had an existing number) and everything seems to be going ok. I finally have a real ID, none of that expired college ####### ID I had been carrying forever in my wallet.

Now we have an interview coming up, I've read crazy horror stories and I'm a little worried.

My wife and I have been together forever, I met her when she was 18, I was 23, now I'm 31 and she's turning 26. We've been living together for over a year (joint lease on the apartment), last November we discovered she's pregnant (what a surprise) we are very happy. I'm a little scared, because I feel like a big kid still and about to turn a father; and still I feel "undocumented".

We have tons of pictures, scrap books dating back since our corny puppy love days, we got married in city hall with her best friend (now also pregnant lol) as a witness, we threw a small engagement shindig and the rest is history. The only thing we have in our name together is the lease for the apartment and a 2013 tax return (which is our first year being married, so we filed as a married couple).

We know each other inside out, so I'm not worried about questions or anything. I'm not sure entirely what to expect from our interview situation since I am seeing every case is totally different. I've never been arrested or broke the law or anything of the nature; my wife and I are expecting a baby, we live together, we love and hate each other, we know each other real good.. I'm not sure what I'm scared of.

The idea that someone will make the decision that will impact my life is scaring the living stuff out of me.

My mom and I don't talk anymore, she hates my wife; my wife met her (it only took meeting her about less than 10 times and hearing the way she treats me on the phone to make the decision to never talk to her again) my wife's family loves me, I'm considered family; well I am now technically lol. My wife and I both work, I've worked for a long time, my wife does also; I'm not really sure what curve ball will be thrown into this interview situation.

I guess I'm seeking some words of wisdom, or comfort rather. I want to know everything will be ok. I don't think much will change in my life personally as I lived my whole youth always scared to go out (I had no ID, I was embarrassed to go anywhere), never been on an airplane before (other than when my mother brought me here), never drove a car.. It's actually pretty sad. I think the first thing I'd do is learn to drive, maybe go on a real vacation and not to our local beach.

So.. those of you who experienced this before, and those of you who know of the process.. My question is, should I be so nervous? should I be so worried? am I missing something? is there a way to better prepare and if so, how? do I need to prepare? My wife acts like this is nothing, she said take a few pics, a few letters from friends, pics of all the pics hanging in the house, etc. but for some reason I feel this weird nervousness I just want this over with.

Thank you for reading my thoughts,

Regards,
NewYork2014

[zuluweta 250]

Congratulations on coming out of the shadows and for finding a pathway towards finally having legal status. I can't imagine how tough your young adult life must have been.

As to your questions, just search VJ for similar stories of others who adjusted status from expired visas.

[Cathi 5,617]

Did you at any point ever claim US citizenship while applying for jobs, bank accounts, school or student loans? Did you ever register to vote?

[NewYork2014 9]

Congratulations on coming out of the shadows and for finding a pathway towards finally having legal status. I can't imagine how tough your young adult life must have been.

As to your questions, just search VJ for similar stories of others who adjusted status from expired visas.

Thanks, yeah it sucked living this way (it sucked even more keeping this secret, you have no idea how many opportunities, friends and normal life things I have missed out on). It's ok though, I have come terms and am now finally trying to do the right thing, I suppose.

I'm just nervous about this interview, I read on VJ many stories but they are all tailored for different situations; some which contain portions of my story and many others. It inspired me to post on here, I'm just looking for comfort I guess.. After all these years, this whole thing is so nerve wrecking I can't even begin to describe it.

Did you at any point ever claim US citizenship while applying for jobs, bank accounts, school or student loans? Did you ever register to vote?

Never claimed USC, I know I'm not there's no reason to lie about it.

I have a bank account open with my SSN I opened as a student account while attending my Jr. year of college.

Never took a loan, never had a credit card, I owe money to no one.

Can not register to vote, can not vote; no passport and no ID.

[Jon York 156]

I don't think you have a thing to be worried about! I think you're worried only because it will be such a huge and positive life change for you - and you're just having trouble believing it could really happen! But it can and it will. I can't see any reason from what you've told us for you to be worried. It seems you haven't lied to anybody about your status, you haven't collected any benefits or taken anything you weren't entitled to. So there should really be no problem. Plus, you're in a very legit and very real marriage. That's what they're trained to spot. I'm certain they'll see immediately that your marriage is real and you'll be fine.

Edited March 9, 2014 by Jon York

[NewYork2014 9]

I don't think you have a thing to be worried about! I think you're worried only because it will be such a huge and positive life change for you - and you're just having trouble believing it could really happen! But it can and it will. I can't see any reason from what you've told us for you to be worried. It seems you haven't lied to anybody about your status, you haven't collected any benefits or taken anything you weren't entitled to. So there should really be no problem. Plus, you're in a very legit and very real marriage. That's what they're trained to spot. I'm certain they'll see immediately that your marriage is real and you'll be fine.

Thank you, Jon.

Alright, we'll see how it goes; I'll re-hit this thread once we return from the city and share the experience of it. Our interview is in 3 weeks in Manhattan, New York.

[Cathi 5,617]

Thanks, yeah it sucked living this way (it sucked even more keeping this secret, you have no idea how many opportunities, friends and normal life things I have missed out on). It's ok though, I have come terms and am now finally trying to do the right thing, I suppose.

I'm just nervous about this interview, I read on VJ many stories but they are all tailored for different situations; some which contain portions of my story and many others. It inspired me to post on here, I'm just looking for comfort I guess.. After all these years, this whole thing is so nerve wrecking I can't even begin to describe it.

Never claimed USC, I know I'm not there's no reason to lie about it.

I have a bank account open with my SSN I opened as a student account while attending my Jr. year of college.

Never took a loan, never had a credit card, I owe money to no one.

Can not register to vote, can not vote; no passport and no ID.

I was just asking. Many times we have seen people here illegally do these things, most of the time unintentionally. In many states the DMV asks everyone if they want to register to vote and it has gotten people in trouble down the line. Seeing that you did none of these things you shouldn't have anything to worry about. Best of luck!

[NewYork2014 9]

I was just asking. Many times we have seen people here illegally do these things, most of the time unintentionally. In many states the DMV asks everyone if they want to register to vote and it has gotten people in trouble down the line. Seeing that you did none of these things you shouldn't have anything to worry about. Best of luck!

Thanks.

I understand what you mean, you know what's funny; I think even if I did intend on collecting any of these benefits it would not be possible. In NYC, without ID or Passport it is impossible to do anything from entering a club, buying alcohol, buying tobacco, getting any kind of insurance, any kind of food stamps and of course voting either on a local level (city or state elections) or federal (presidential elections). I have no idea how people would even do it, laws are so strict they are designed to keep you if you aren't authorized from doing anything unless human negligence is at play.

I even had a hard time opening a bank account, I always wanted credit cards but could never get one (not even a Macy's one, let alone a big bank). The worst part is not having a non-drivers state issued ID. My school ID only carried me as far as getting something notarized or proving my identity for limited needs.

I can not wait until this is over, my closest friend is neutralized citizen but takes everything for granted; doesn't quite understand why I am so ambitious, because the mother of invention is necessity and once this is over with I truly feel like sky will be the limit.

Until that day, I will always be nervous, lol.

[Abby&Mario 100]

I have no words of wisdom on the subject, so all I can do is wish you the best of luck. Please let us know what happens with the interview! I can't imagine how difficult your life has been. Here's to a new beginning for you and your new family, no longer in the shadows!

Edited March 9, 2014 by Abby&Mario

[Jon York 156]

Yes, let us know how it goes. And the sky truly is the limit in this country... still! So get legal and get to working hard and you can do anything you want! All the best.

[MissLottieLou 0]

I'm brand new on here although I've been reading for a few months, so I don't really have anything to add - just wanted to say good luck with it!

[Sekhvaruli 74]

I've heard that illegal stay is normally forgiven to US citizens' spouses. Especially giving the fact that was not your irresponsibility but your Mom's.

But I am also stunned with how you made it through half of your life without a legal ID

[NewYork2014 9]

I've heard that illegal stay is normally forgiven to US citizens' spouses. Especially giving the fact that was not your irresponsibility but your Mom's.

But I am also stunned with how you made it through half of your life without a legal ID

Easy, never go anywhere. I relayed on the closest thing to me; my school ID (which contains no address, no birthday). I avoided the possibility of ever being in trouble legally, thus eliminating the worst possible scenario of not having an ID and being in trouble with law enforcement. In NY it is illegal to not carry an ID, individuals with no ID are brought to a precinct to get finger printed and investigated for warrants, etc.

I never really left home, always on a computer; learning, programming, designing. Never went clubbing really, once in a blue I'd use an expired passport with my picture (when I was 12 years old) with a college ID to prove my age to get in somewhere (this is VERY embarrassing by the way, the trick is to wait until there is no one behind you in line.).

Other than this, never applied for anything that required an ID. It's possible to live "invisibly" from what I've read over a million individuals in the U.S. live this way.

One thing I can say is, it sure is not healthy. Psychologically.

And by the way thank you to everyone who had commented on my thread, I will be sure to update you. I feel more confidant now when we do head to the interview we will ace it. My wife thanks you guys as well.

[NewYork2014 9]

Just left the USCIS building, I was approved! I promised to post an update, longer version will follow shortly as I'm posting on my iPhone. I feel GREAT!!

[NewYork2014 9]

Finally home!

So here is how it went, last night after Game of Thrones (love that show) my wife and I started gathering all the required documents in the checklist. We went document crazy, packing a suitcase loaded with pictures, cards, e-mail print outs, bills, agreements, leases, contracts, pictures of our home, photo albums, scrap books and everything we could possibly get our hands on that shows a track of our relationship from the day which we met, until today.

This morning, schlepping this heavy suitcase we took the subway to the USCIS building; 1 hour early. After a security check, we enter the building and head to the check-in booth with my appointment letter. We were asked if we need a translator or if an attorney was coming, both to which we said no to.

Sitting in the upper floor, we got our waiting ticket; perhaps 40 other people in the room and we're eagerly waiting to start and end this process. We saw the immigration officers call up random couples, some officers seemed nicer than others; some seemed a bit less, nicer.

Finally our man came and called out our number, we entered a small room (almost like a cubicle) where we were asked to raise our right hand and swear to tell the truth. We sat down and the IO asked for our ID's, we provided our ID's to him, a very nice man and he gave them right back to us. After giving us our ID's in return, he asked whether my wife ever had a different name (which she answered no to), he quickly browsed through the packet which we had originally sent the office when we applied for the AOS. We tried to show him our entire suitcase of documents, but he did not want to see any of our supporting evidence, I asked if he would like to go through some of our photo albums, he did not seem interested in going through our entire photo book and just asked us for two photos. He also took a copy of our lease agreement for our apartment, after he glanced at out tax return for a moment and that was pretty much it.

He did not ask us anything about each other, he did not even question us about our marriage or anything of the sort. We showed him our marriage certificate, we had originals of all the documents which we originally sent in but he didn't really look through them like we thought he would.

As a matter of fact, this was more like an orientation than an interview, to look at the original documents from the AOS but to my surprise he asked us absolutely nothing about each other, our marriage, relationship or anything. We engaged in small talk afterwards for about 10 minutes, about his job and about USCIS. I asked him, what's the next step now? and he replied "Well the interview was over 15 minutes ago, the next step is you'll be getting your green card in the mail. Just don't forget to apply to remove the conditions on it 3 months before it expires.".

I was relived to hear that we passed and I am now officially a green card holder.

I am just shocked that from everything I have read, and I mean everything, we had a completely different and opposite experience where almost no questions were even asked. Our marriage wasn't questioned, put to the test or anything of that nature. I can't help but to think was it our insanely over packed suitcase of evidence, or my wife's pregnant belly that made this whole process such a breeze.

I can hope it is a breeze for others as well, thank you for the great support I have received reading on forums such as this.

My wife just said; basically, people with legitimate marriages should have nothing to worry about; maybe it was just all too obvious the way my wife and I talk to each other, or look at each other; I'm unsure but she claims she was absolutely not worried at all. I on the other hand, totally different; always worried.

All I have to say is thank God.