money problems in paradise...

[iluvmy_hubbybunny 9]

The hospital sounds publuc hospital to me not.. A private hospital.. Coz in my experience private hospital do operation (when my dad is sick) and pay the hospital bill when releasing.. Public hospital do pay now..operation later.. So who knows.. As her if its private or not and even its private it wont cost that much unless u are in st. Lukes hospital..

[Tahoma 2,291]

Chinook worked as an RN at a tertiary public hospital in 'pinas. At her hospital, an emergency case like the brother's case would be treated first and then billed afterward.

[hellINTIM 9]

Chinook worked as an RN at a tertiary public hospital in 'pinas. At her hospital, an emergency case like the brother's case would be treated first and then billed afterward.

Thats what they did to me... treated first , then billed was in processed while ur staying in the hospital.. of course u need to pay it before they release you to go home.

[madtownguy 164]

Thanks for the replies! And no she didn't ask for the money, I learned about it from asking. She said her parents told her to ask but she wouldn't do that. The actual bill was much less after they shopped around Dr.'s. The price may be high because of reconstructive facial surgery, I'm not sure though. All is well and I didn't send any more money than I was planning to for Xmas. I just didn't think an accident would happen that was really bad and not a story.

[rlogan 2,036]

That's usually how people find out: "How's the weather there, honey?" "Did your brother have a motorcycle accident today"? "Did your mom's leg get bit off by a crocodile"?

You'll never see the girl showing how sad she is, acting like she doesn't want to say, and then reluctantly telling only because you ask. You'll also never see her saying that the parents want her to ask while explaining that she would never do so. And you'll never see round numbers in American currency like ten thousand.

[madtownguy 164]

That's usually how people find out: "How's the weather there, honey?" "Did your brother have a motorcycle accident today"? "Did your mom's leg get bit off by a crocodile"?

You'll never see the girl showing how sad she is, acting like she doesn't want to say, and then reluctantly telling only because you ask. You'll also never see her saying that the parents want her to ask while explaining that she would never do so. And you'll never see round numbers in American currency like ten thousand.

You are wise beyond your years obviously... Keep enjoying living in your little Alaskan prison you have set up. My fiance did not give me the USD amount, she gave me it in pesos and it did not come to exactly 10k I rounded the numbers. I asked 4 times if her parents asked her to ask me for money before she finally said yes, but she also said she didn't want me to send any. If I would not have asked a question the story would have been I'm sad cuz my brother got into an accident today. It took me 3 days to find out how bad and then about 5 to get a photo because I was so interested in how the system works there and I thought there might be exaggeration on how bad it actually is. I sent a total of 4100 for Xmas, I was going to send more today but she told me she still has plenty of money and that it's pointless to send more. She was not giving me a sob story to get money, unless I ask she doesn't talk about it at all. If she ever asked me for money I would move on to the next, I just was surprised that some of these emergencies actually happen I assumed they were all fake.

[hellINTIM 9]

You are wise beyond your years obviously... Keep enjoying living in your little Alaskan prison you have set up. My fiance did not give me the USD amount, she gave me it in pesos and it did not come to exactly 10k I rounded the numbers. I asked 4 times if her parents asked her to ask me for money before she finally said yes, but she also said she didn't want me to send any. If I would not have asked a question the story would have been I'm sad cuz my brother got into an accident today. It took me 3 days to find out how bad and then about 5 to get a photo because I was so interested in how the system works there and I thought there might be exaggeration on how bad it actually is. I sent a total of 4100 for Xmas, I was going to send more today but she told me she still has plenty of money and that it's pointless to send more. She was not giving me a sob story to get money, unless I ask she doesn't talk about it at all. If she ever asked me for money I would move on to the next, I just was surprised that some of these emergencies actually happen I assumed they were all fake.

it happened but i guess ur fiance knows that your not just looting the $$$$$ ....

[rlogan 2,036]

I asked 4 times if her parents asked her to ask me for money before she finally said yes

I only need to ask mine questions once.

My fiance did not give me the USD amount, she gave me it in pesos and it did not come to exactly 10k I rounded the numbers.

I wasn't the first person who noticed this and that the amount was extraordinarily high.

I realize from previous experience with you that shape-shifting is the primary feature of your posts so seeing it in this response is no surprise:

If I would not have asked a question the story would have been I'm sad cuz my brother got into an accident today...

unless I ask she doesn't talk about it at all

Maybe it would be good to proof your posts to make sure you don't directly contradict yourself in the same paragraph: she would have told you if you didn't ask, but you have to ask (a lot of times too!) or else she won't tell you.

[sunandmoon 450]

I don't know many people who would give 10k to their wives families in the US so how do you justify doing it for someone in the philippines?

could this be why it was assumed to be USD.

Edited December 19, 2012 by sunandmoon

[sunandmoon 450]

My fiance did not give me the USD amount, she gave me it in pesos and it did not come to exactly 10k I rounded the numbers.

would this thread have lasted 50+ posts if it was known the 10,000 pisos was for hospital bills due to motorcycle accident...

[ben krahne 0]

I've seen a few posts that mention it's normal for fiances family to ask for money in the Philippines when emergencies come up. I had already sat down and explained to my fiances family that I will not be sending any money back, that my fiance can send back 100% of whatever money she makes. I really didn't think anything that major would come up, but I was sadly mistaken. Her brother got into a motorcycle accident and when I heard the cost of the surgery I knew it was pretty damn bad. I never thought it would be hard saying I can't send money but it was. I'm wondering if anyone has found other ways to deal with this kind of situation? I don't know many people who would give 10k to their wives families in the US so how do you justify doing it for someone in the philippines? It feels like either way it's a bad decision, being a crutch can hurt as much as help. I understand their daily life and general stuff, but I still don't understand how loans work or how you have to wait for surgery until you pay for it all. I guess it's all a bigger dilemma than I originally thought it would be.

are you talking pesos or dollars? never mind its pesos ,

Some are fake some are just family pressure to help its a big problem

Edited December 19, 2012 by ben krahne

[actob99 156]

Every couple needs to decide early in the relationship how to handle finances. Some of us send money every month, some don't send money regularly but save for emergencies, some send no money but regularly send boxes, some help in other ways besides finances, and others do nothing. There is no right answer, just make sure that you have both agreed how things will be handle.

From my perspective, 10K (I'm assuming that is dollars) is a lot of money. Still, I would help as much as I could. But that's just me.

I just hope the brother comes out of this okay.

Agreed. These issues about money should be hammered out before she is even your fiancee. What happens when you are visiting and hanging around the family? Are they asking for money?

I have a friend who lives in the PI and his wife( pushed by the family) has gotten way out of hand with money. They have to have everything now and if not, some kind of emergency arises. It's 100% his fault because they didn't talk about finances or set any allowances before getting married. Now they have a 1 year old princess and holy ###### it's surprising the stories now...

[ca_babe 129]

My father was diagnosed with colorectal cancer at the same time that my mom had a heart attack. My brother asked me to send $4000 for my father's surgery and I sent $0. I was already paying for my mom's expenses and I'm not wiling to send money to somebody who abandoned us for another woman 2 decades ago. Anyways, when they found out that I won't be sending money, they contacted the hospital's billing department and applied for financial assistance. The bill went down from $4000 to $1000 because they found a pro-bono doctor and he stayed in a ward instead of a private suite. Half of the $1000 bill came from a donation from the Charity Sweeptakes Office. My father's mistress fell in line for several hours in order to apply for aid which was approved. The rest of the money came from his inheritance. It didn't take long for him to come up with a solution for his problem. Had I given the money for the surgery, I would also be asked to send my half-siblings to school and etc.

[Karee 4,189]

My father was diagnosed with colorectal cancer at the same time that my mom had a heart attack. My brother asked me to send $4000 for my father's surgery and I sent $0. I was already paying for my mom's expenses and I'm not wiling to send money to somebody who abandoned us for another woman 2 decades ago. Anyways, when they found out that I won't be sending money, they contacted the hospital's billing department and applied for financial assistance. The bill went down from $4000 to $1000 because they found a pro-bono doctor and he stayed in a ward instead of a private suite. Half of the $1000 bill came from a donation from the Charity Sweeptakes Office. My father's mistress fell in line for several hours in order to apply for aid which was approved. The rest of the money came from his inheritance. It didn't take long for him to come up with a solution for his problem. Had I given the money for the surgery, I would also be asked to send my half-siblings to school and etc.

Best post I've seen on VJ in awhile.

[Sandra G. 5,016]

I am not saying is your case but i notice here that a lot but a LOT of women from some Countries as soon they start dating the american citizen they start sending money to pay the girl food,cellphone,school,clothes etc...how did they survive before finding the guy with blue passport????I can understand if your wife is waiting to get the visa and became unemployed but I saw here in the VJ people dating just a few months or just engaged and started sending money.People need to make sure their partners are in the relationship for the right reason.In your case I would not give more than 2k.Today was her brother, maybe tomorrow might be her mother,father,her niece,nephew....How sure are you that the guy in the picture is her brother? I am just saying...We see here almost every week in the VJ people scammed.I handled hundreds of case that the beneficiary got in the USA and after 7 days,30 days,60days just vanished.