well things change in a year....

[tcTTct 37]

In the OP's case his wife arrived last Saturday and is already living at her sister's house.

[Therealworld 90]

If you are still under two years you can refuse to do the paperwork to remove conditions or go to the interview and state that she left you and she will not be issued a 10 year visa. They have to follow up with you to make sure the marraige is still valid. This is why there is a two year temp visa. If a marriage is not legit by either party, it will not last for the whole two years in most cases. What people do not realize that they still need the petitioner to get their ten year visa

Well all mail with have to come to your house. You do not have to give her anything if you choose not to. No SS number or green card.

[Therealworld 90]

Just dont do the paperwork to remove conditions. If that paperwork is not done I believe it will cancel the Visa. This is a must it has to be done within a certain time frame before you are married two years. Also if you have a follow up interview explain to them what happend or do not go. She will not know what needs to be done still if you do not tell her. This is why the first greencard is temporary. If there is one person in a marriage that is not legit, it will not last two years. this is why they changed this time frame. All paperwork has to come to you at your address. Let her get deported. If she stays here you know you will still have to support her financially. Is this what you want. Let her be here living off your money and you cannot be with her as a real husband and wife? Think about it.

[Ban Hammer 12,878]

one personal attack removed.

[Ning 619]

If you are still under two years you can refuse to do the paperwork to remove conditions or go to the interview and state that she left you and she will not be issued a 10 year visa. They have to follow up with you to make sure the marraige is still valid. This is why there is a two year temp visa. If a marriage is not legit by either party, it will not last for the whole two years in most cases. What people do not realize that they still need the petitioner to get their ten year visa

Well all mail with have to come to your house. You do not have to give her anything if you choose not to. No SS number or green card.

I agree with the basic ideas in the first part of this post.

However you are advising the O P to commit a crime by stealing her property that has been mailed to her. Those items are issued to her in her name & are U S govt documents which do not belong to the O P.

[tcTTct 37]

You are right. I was talking about the forum here. I have also introduced two friends to babes who have since been successful with the visa and they are here and married. My wife has a lot of VN and am constantly hearing about the community and from what I have seen there are few Visa card and gone babes. I tend to look at positives always though. Just from what I have seen personally is that in the VN forum and community I am in there is little stuff like this. I do see often in other forums here.

I'm near Little Saigon, Orange County and there are many many more of those bad cases here I do admire your positive attitude, and many congratulation on your wonderful marriage

[Grant PDX 183]

Actually if you two divorce she can (has to) apply for ROC immediately. It might look highly suspicious but if she can demonstrate that the marriage was entered into in good faith then she will get her status adjusted. Again, it might look highly suspicious if it happened so fast. But the removal of conditions is her process, not yours.

If you have proof that she did not enter into the relationship in good faith, contact ICE and they can deal with it. You cannot have her deported. But any proof or information that you have could lead to that.

I would hope that the issue is nerves only and that it works out for you. It would be a bummer to throw away a long relationship and long and expensive visa process after such a short time together here.

Best of luck.

[The Rice King 1]

If you are still under two years you can refuse to do the paperwork to remove conditions or go to the interview and state that she left you and she will not be issued a 10 year visa. They have to follow up with you to make sure the marraige is still valid. This is why there is a two year temp visa. If a marriage is not legit by either party, it will not last for the whole two years in most cases. What people do not realize that they still need the petitioner to get their ten year visa

Well all mail with have to come to your house. You do not have to give her anything if you choose not to. No SS number or green card.

Can someone also confirm the accuracy of this information? This is an interesting topic. I am sure you all can understand how difficult it can be to have faith on a distant relationship with a person of different culture and learn their real motives. My personal relationship and communication is great but the though of just been played this whole time terrifies me.

Please continue to advice. I will continue to follow up with this thread.

Edited March 19, 2012 by Jacob and Ngan

[Ning 619]

Can someone also confirm the accuracy of this information? This is an interesting topic. I am sure you all can understand how difficult it can be to have faith on a distant relationship with a person of different culture and learn their real motives. My personal relationship and communication is great but the though of just been played this whole time terrifies me.

Please continue to advice. I will continue to follow up with this thread.

It isnt exactly correct.

The visa is converted to a green card by the initial AOS process. That results in a two year G C not a temp visa.

I hope you arent living in fear of this outcome as you say. If your wife is that good of an actor help her join SAG. You should be the best judge of the quality of your realtionship. Dont let others perception of things affect your ability to enjoy your life.

[The Rice King 1]

It isnt exactly correct.

The visa is converted to a green card by the initial AOS process. That results in a two year G C not a temp visa.

I hope you arent living in fear of this outcome as you say. If your wife is that good of an actor help her join SAG. You should be the best judge of the quality of your realtionship. Dont let others perception of things affect your ability to enjoy your life.

Thanks for taking your time to post. I didn't start this thread. Although I am very confident in my relationship I can't help to wonder for my self when I see stuff like this happen. I agree that only I can be the judge of my relationship. As for the member who started this thread I hope he can rejoin his wife soon and live happy. Is difficult to advice when only knowing a fraction of one side of the story. My advice is to take some time to take a closer look at yourself and make an assessment of what might have cause this to go wrong and avoid the blame shifting game. Try to understand her point of view and both agree to compromise. Although there are some true stories of spouses bailing out after coming to the US I find it hard to believe that there could be so many cases of heartless people doing this just to crossover. When it comes to international marriage statistics, there are many that provide evidence that most of the international marriages are successful. There are only about 20-25% cases in which a U.S citizen married someone from a foreign country and got divorced. This international marriage statistic shows that there are fewer divorces in cases of international marriages than in cases of both spouses being U.S citizens. Remember that marriage is like a garden that needs constant nurture. The garden then grows bigger and more challenging to keep but the rewards will be worth the hard work.

Edited March 19, 2012 by Jacob and Ngan

[David-Hien 11]

Can someone also confirm the accuracy of this information? This is an interesting topic. I am sure you all can understand how difficult it can be to have faith on a distant relationship with a person of different culture and learn their real motives. My personal relationship and communication is great but the though of just been played this whole time terrifies me.

Please continue to advice. I will continue to follow up with this thread.

If you want to know, you must read from the opinion of a Caucasian American man, not a Vietnamese American man.

Each case has its own situation that leads to different status.

My husband is a Caucasian American man, so I will tell you how I felt when I arrived the US. However, my case is not the general picture of the international marriage. You should listen from some more others.

It was very hard for me to join into the American society even I studied and graduated the University of HoChiMinh city in English major. The paper process was so long for me to get the green card because I entered the US by fiance visa. Within those 8 months waiting for 2 yrs green card, I had to do everything in our house to make myself feel less depression and homesick, such as helping my husband painting our house, taking care the garden, cooking, cleaning, doing laundry,....

I couldnot go out because I didn't know how to drive yet, I had to lean how to drive. Then, I could not come back to work and school due to the green card process again. I had to wait 8 months, then I decided to work for a fast food restaurant near our house to make some money. But later, I wanted to come back to school because the works in a fastfood restaurant made me feel frustrating and exhausted with the rude attitude of some customers.

It is really hard for me to do both jobs: being a mother for our new daughter and being a college student. When I passed nearly 2 years in school, some of the men on this forum told me that do not "show off." I didn't understand what he mentioned about. It means I thought that my college education was nothing to "show off," but the other think that the college education level is high enough to "show off." Strange stereotype.

My female friends' attitudes are different. One closed friend told me that education is expensive, so I should not study. Some others thought that I tried to study to "show off."

I think that if I accepted the American husband, I had to studied his mother language to understand him, in addition, if I could know a little bit higher enough to get a job to join into the society where will be my country, I hope for a part-time job to assist him for the expenses in our house. It will be good for our family. Then, I will add more with a business or just taking care of my family.

It is hard to make a husband in different language to understand what I want to say sometimes. He cannot understand the beautiful of our language, the humorous words, the lovely words when I say in Vietnamese to my friends or to my husband and in the contrast from my side. In addition, our conflict in the normal life that every normal couple must face may be enough to make our relationship broken. It is really hard to protect the relationship throughout years.

Edited March 19, 2012 by David-Hien

[ScottThuy 140]

In the OP's case his wife arrived last Saturday and is already living at her sister's house.

That in itself is a huge red flag, but doesnt always mean fraud... maybe she's hiding/taking a break from the chim for a few days... aside from culture shock, in many cases a woman gets here and can be overwhelmed by a guys instant/continuous demand for sex.

[Deputy Purple 1,294]

If you are still under two years you can refuse to do the paperwork to remove conditions or go to the interview and state that she left you and she will not be issued a 10 year visa. They have to follow up with you to make sure the marraige is still valid. This is why there is a two year temp visa. If a marriage is not legit by either party, it will not last for the whole two years in most cases. What people do not realize that they still need the petitioner to get their ten year visa

Well all mail with have to come to your house. You do not have to give her anything if you choose not to. No SS number or green card.

Let's correct a few things here:

You are confusing Visa with Greencard first off.

Second, the immigrant spouse can easily Remove Conditions after divorce by proving they entered the marriage in good faith, this generally requires proof of financial co-mingling (Joint Accounts) and co-habitation (living at the same address for a period of time). If the US Citizen Spouse thinks they can foil the ROC by remaining married they are wrong, the Immigrant can always file for divorce and still ROC.

Now once the Immigrant is Divorced (while still on a Conditional Greencard) if the ex-spouse informs USCIS then they may notify the Immigrant that they have 30 days to either file for ROC or leave the country before they would be put in removal proceedings.

In this case where the Immigrant Wife appears to have fled directly to her Sister's after arriving I would imagine ROC would be difficult if the US Citizen Husband filed for divorce NOW she would need to prove "Good Faith" but lacks the evidence.

That leaves her to claim she left him due to abuse in which case she would need to prove abuse.

If the OP is worried about a possible abuse claim then he needs to heed this advice:

NEVER EVER EVER UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES be alone with this woman again. If she approaches you take out you phone and tell her you're calling the cops, then enter a business or public place with people around and wait for the police to arrive. If she physically assaults you DO NOT STRIKE BACK EVEN IN DEFENSE. Go to the men's bathroom of the business where you are waiting and lock yourself in a stall until the police arrive.

Finally, to repeat what another VJer said, the OP can't legally keep her Greencard and SSN Card (in fact there have been cases where it was determined abusive to use threat of immigrant status to control someone). The best he can do is return them by marking "No At This Address, RETURN TO SENDER" and putting them back in the mailbox.

Edited March 20, 2012 by Bob 4 Anna

[tcTTct 37]

... maybe she's hiding/taking a break from the chim for a few days...

Scott, you just said she's taking a break from the pu$$y for a few days . You meant "cac"

Edited March 20, 2012 by tcTTct

[quann 26]

bleh, already OP? and after all the trying time you also just want to drop it and send her on her way? onto the next case...i mean wife i guess

I disagree. I have heard little about this happening in this forum. I have heard more about other countries and not just in Asia though. My wife is a lot younger and definitely a lot better looking than I. I have expected her to say for a long time, "bye" and leave. I can't figure out why she is still with me. I have even told her that she can leave and have no problem on getting the citizenship if she want. Yet she stays. Been here now almost 3 years and I am still puzzled.

Btw there is pics of her and even a couple of me if anyone wants to click of photos

tbh lucky there's been alot uglier VK guys than you marrying much hotter VN girls than your wife...those don't tend to last either. unless our white brethrens in here i'm also from OC, CA and would need more than my fingers/feet to count the "failed" marriages.