How to file for Child Support? Very irresponsible Dad!

[Vince and Cheryl 1]

My FIANCE VISA was approved last January 20 and I'm finally reuniting with my heart on March 21. I have a 14 year old son whose dad lives in Los Angeles and is a naturalized American Citizen. It has been very difficult to ask financial support from his dad and I always feel like I'm begging for it. He has work and does not have any other children. I need help in making him do his part as his father and protection for my son. My questions are:

- Is there a way for us to seek assistance from the US government in making sure that my son gets the support that he needs from him and that he can provide?

- What is the process in filing child support in LA?

- He signed my son's birth certificate and I have all the email, pictures proving that he is the father of my son, what else do we need?

Hope someone can help us.

Your advice will be very much appreciated.

Thank you and God bless!

[VanessaTony 3,567]

Be aware in moving to the US there are different rules there. Your son's father could be given visitation rights. Unlike in the Philippines where the mother has sole legal custody, he has rights to his child and you are not automatically the child's guardian. Just be aware that filing for financial support may open a bigger can of worms than you want to deal with as he may file for some sort of custody, as is his right.

[LIFE'SJOURNEY 970]

Yes, the father should be responsible for his child, but when you start the filing procedure you will be allowing your past ex back into your life. To answer your question about filing for child support, you file for childsupport from within the state you will be living in.

Filing is done and handled by the state/county in which the parents who now has physical custody of the child. Google it by your new US address.

[Vince and Cheryl 1]

Be aware in moving to the US there are different rules there. Your son's father could be given visitation rights. Unlike in the Philippines where the mother has sole legal custody, he has rights to his child and you are not automatically the child's guardian. Just be aware that filing for financial support may open a bigger can of worms than you want to deal with as he may file for some sort of custody, as is his right.

I dont have a problem with that He can see his son anytime he wants. I just want him to be responsible and be present in his child's life Thank you for your response God bless

[Vince and Cheryl 1]

Yes, the father should be responsible for his child, but when you start the filing procedure you will be allowing your past ex back into your life. To answer your question about filing for child support, you file for childsupport from within the state you will be living in.

Filing is done and handled by the state/county in which the parents who now has physical custody of the child. Google it by your new US address.

We stayed friends but he never took him being a father seriously. I will definitely look into that and file it asap Thanks and God bless

[VanessaTony 3,567]

I dont have a problem with that He can see his son anytime he wants. I just want him to be responsible and be present in his child's life Thank you for your response God bless

You misunderstand. He might not want to SEE his son and instead TAKE his son from you for sole custody.

[aaron2020 11,651]

My FIANCE VISA was approved last January 20 and I'm finally reuniting with my heart on March 21. I have a 14 year old son whose dad lives in Los Angeles and is a naturalized American Citizen. It has been very difficult to ask financial support from his dad and I always feel like I'm begging for it. He has work and does not have any other children. I need help in making him do his part as his father and protection for my son. My questions are:

- Is there a way for us to seek assistance from the US government in making sure that my son gets the support that he needs from him and that he can provide?

- What is the process in filing child support in LA?

- He signed my son's birth certificate and I have all the email, pictures proving that he is the father of my son, what else do we need?

Hope someone can help us.

Your advice will be very much appreciated.

Thank you and God bless!

The US government will not help you go after your son's father for child support. If you want his father to pay child support, you will need to file for child support in family court. You can either hire a lawyer or try to do it yourself.

This is an immigration forum - not a family law forum. Suing your son's father for child support has nothing to do with immigration laws. The how to file for child support and what proof you need is something to ask a California family lawyer or for you to investigate on your own. You are unlikely to get family law advice here.

[aaron2020 11,651]

You misunderstand. He might not want to SEE his son and instead TAKE his son from you for sole custody.

It's highly unlikely that the father will be granted custody based on his past failures to provide for his child. Furthermore, the family court will consider the 14 years old child's wishes as to which parent he would like to live with.

The chances of a deadbeat dad gaining custody in a child support action is almost zero unless the mother is unable to care for her child or is a danger to the child.

If you were the judge, woould you grant custody to a deadbeat dad when the 14 years old has no desire to live with him?

Edited February 20, 2012 by aaron2020

[VanessaTony 3,567]

It's highly unlikely that the father will be granted custody based on his past failures to provide for his child. Furthermore, the family court will consider the 14 years old child's wishes as to which parent he would like to live with.

The chances of a deadbeat dad gaining custody in a child support action is almost zero unless the mother is unable to care for her child or is a danger to the child.

If you were the judge, woould you grant custody to a deadbeat dad when the 14 years old has no desire to live with him?

You're assuming he's a deadbeat based on this womans posts. We don't know whether he asked and begged for visits for years and she said no because she was scared he'd keep her. We don't know whether she refused to give him her address in case he tried to come and see the kid or take the kid unannounced. We also don't know that he didn't provide her with support. He could have sent her money but she's decided there's no record 'cause this is a different country now so she's trying to double-dip. We just don't KNOW anything except that she asked how to claim financial support and CLAIMS he's a dead-beat dad.

He has the right to CHALLENGE custody. The 14 y/o's opinion is taken into account yes but there's also a thing called "parental alienation" that they might take into consideration... her poisoning the son against the dad or something like that.

I'm not saying any of this is true but it COULD be true. I know from a family members experience just how vindictive some parents can be. The woman told the child her father was someone else but tried to get money from my family member for support. She kept saying he was a dead-beat dad because he refused to pay unless he got to see the child which she kept denying because the kid didn't know he was her father (and I believe she also made some accusations about his character as well). Now the girl is 11 and my family member FINALLY had enough money (he wasn't rich by any means) to go to court about the child support amount and the lack of visitation. He finally won the right to see his daughter but it meant that he had to meet with her at a psychologist office for a minimum of 6 months in order to get the child used to the idea that the man she thought was her father wasn't, and this man was (and she had 2 half-siblings).

So just because the woman is saying one thing NOW doesn't mean he was or IS a deadbeat dad and not worthy of custody of his son.

Edited February 21, 2012 by Vanessa&Tony

[aaron2020 11,651]

You're assuming he's a deadbeat based on this womans posts. We don't know whether he asked and begged for visits for years and she said no because she was scared he'd keep her. We don't know whether she refused to give him her address in case he tried to come and see the kid or take the kid unannounced. We also don't know that he didn't provide her with support. He could have sent her money but she's decided there's no record 'cause this is a different country now so she's trying to double-dip. We just don't KNOW anything except that she asked how to claim financial support and CLAIMS he's a dead-beat dad.

He has the right to CHALLENGE custody. The 14 y/o's opinion is taken into account yes but there's also a thing called "parental alienation" that they might take into consideration... her poisoning the son against the dad or something like that.

I'm not saying any of this is true but it COULD be true. I know from a family members experience just how vindictive some parents can be. The woman told the child her father was someone else but tried to get money from my family member for support. She kept saying he was a dead-beat dad because he refused to pay unless he got to see the child which she kept denying because the kid didn't know he was her father (and I believe she also made some accusations about his character as well). Now the girl is 11 and my family member FINALLY had enough money (he wasn't rich by any means) to go to court about the child support amount and the lack of visitation. He finally won the right to see his daughter but it meant that he had to meet with her at a psychologist office for a minimum of 6 months in order to get the child used to the idea that the man she thought was her father wasn't, and this man was (and she had 2 half-siblings).

So just because the woman is saying one thing NOW doesn't mean he was or IS a deadbeat dad and not worthy of custody of his son.

True. True. I shouldn't take what is said in the forum on complex family issues at face value. Dad could be an upstanding guy. If he is and mom has denied him access to his son, he could turn the table on her.

[Leatherneck 693]

You don't need an attorney for a child support matter in California. If you're a resident of LA County, go to LA County Child Support Services Department to request their services.

[Vince and Cheryl 1]

The US government will not help you go after your son's father for child support. If you want his father to pay child support, you will need to file for child support in family court. You can either hire a lawyer or try to do it yourself.

This is an immigration forum - not a family law forum. Suing your son's father for child support has nothing to do with immigration laws. The how to file for child support and what proof you need is something to ask a California family lawyer or for you to investigate on your own. You are unlikely to get family law advice here.

This is the only forum I joined and I have been getting a lot of good advice from people. There's also a discussion board where I posted this stating "others." I think its not something that should be taken against me if we try to ask the people here with similar situation or who are aware of the process. You didnt have to reply to this post. We have the freedom to ask anything. Thanks for your advice tho and God bless!

You misunderstand. He might not want to SEE his son and instead TAKE his son from you for sole custody.

Ok. We'll look into this and thank you very much for your advice. Very much appreciated God bless

[Vince and Cheryl 1]

It's highly unlikely that the father will be granted custody based on his past failures to provide for his child. Furthermore, the family court will consider the 14 years old child's wishes as to which parent he would like to live with.

The chances of a deadbeat dad gaining custody in a child support action is almost zero unless the mother is unable to care for her child or is a danger to the child.

If you were the judge, woould you grant custody to a deadbeat dad when the 14 years old has no desire to live with him?

This makes sense and very true. Thanks for this! Whew! God bless you!

[aaron2020 11,651]

This is the only forum I joined and I have been getting a lot of good advice from people. There's also a discussion board where I posted this stating "others." I think its not something that should be taken against me if we try to ask the people here with similar situation or who are aware of the process. You didnt have to reply to this post. We have the freedom to ask anything. Thanks for your advice tho and God bless!

I am not trying to offend you and I have nothing against you - I should be clearer. Family law issues do not often arise on immigration law forums like VisaJourney. There are other forums that does deal with family law issues where you may be able to get better information. That is what I meant. By no means did I want to convey that you shouldn't ask for help here. You would probably get better answers on a family law forum.

Sorry for causing you pain. Good luck.

Here are some family law forums that do deal with child custody and support;

http://www.expertlaw.com/forums/showthread.php?t=9808

http://forum.freeadvice.com/child-support-98/

Edited February 21, 2012 by aaron2020

[Vince and Cheryl 1]

You're assuming he's a deadbeat based on this womans posts. We don't know whether he asked and begged for visits for years and she said no because she was scared he'd keep her. We don't know whether she refused to give him her address in case he tried to come and see the kid or take the kid unannounced. We also don't know that he didn't provide her with support. He could have sent her money but she's decided there's no record 'cause this is a different country now so she's trying to double-dip. We just don't KNOW anything except that she asked how to claim financial support and CLAIMS he's a dead-beat dad.

He has the right to CHALLENGE custody. The 14 y/o's opinion is taken into account yes but there's also a thing called "parental alienation" that they might take into consideration... her poisoning the son against the dad or something like that.

I'm not saying any of this is true but it COULD be true. I know from a family members experience just how vindictive some parents can be. The woman told the child her father was someone else but tried to get money from my family member for support. She kept saying he was a dead-beat dad because he refused to pay unless he got to see the child which she kept denying because the kid didn't know he was her father (and I believe she also made some accusations about his character as well). Now the girl is 11 and my family member FINALLY had enough money (he wasn't rich by any means) to go to court about the child support amount and the lack of visitation. He finally won the right to see his daughter but it meant that he had to meet with her at a psychologist office for a minimum of 6 months in order to get the child used to the idea that the man she thought was her father wasn't, and this man was (and she had 2 half-siblings).

So just because the woman is saying one thing NOW doesn't mean he was or IS a deadbeat dad and not worthy of custody of his son.

Wow. Thats a totally different story. But thanks. Just proves that there are different opinions from people. I still appreciate this tho. Debate is good. But no need because nothing you stated was true. We are friends until now and he is free to talk and see his son anytime he wants. That was never taken from. He will always be the father of my child and our child doesnt have to suffer just because we didnt work out i just need to know what we need to do so my child will be protected in terms of financial support. Thats his right as his son. I just dont like to continue begging for support because thats his responsibility. I will definitely see a lawyer for this. Thanks for your advice