Divorce before filing for adjustment of status.

[Igor&Veronika 1]

I posted a few weeks ago about situation my sister in-law got herself into.

In short, she came to US on a visitor visa back in July. Dated for a couple of weeks and married some slick guy against our will and her's better judgment.

She got married on September 28, 2009 to a permanent resident. He didn't file adjustment for her. As of yesterday they are finally apart and she wants somehow to file for divorce before she goes home to her country next week.

The guy looks like had a ADD since 9 year old (Attention deficit disorder) that started show itself off in the last week.

Question is what can she do either to divorce him or annul the marriage given that she is leaving the US next week?

Any suggestions will be greatly appreciated....

[DoneWaiting 15]

I posted a few weeks ago about situation my sister in-law got herself into.

In short, she came to US on a visitor visa back in July. Dated for a couple of weeks and married some slick guy against our will and her's better judgment.

She got married on September 28, 2009 to a permanent resident. He didn't file adjustment for her. As of yesterday they are finally apart and she wants somehow to file for divorce before she goes home to her country next week.

The guy looks like had a ADD since 9 year old (Attention deficit disorder) that started show itself off in the last week.

Question is what can she do either to divorce him or annul the marriage given that she is leaving the US next week?

Any suggestions will be greatly appreciated....

The first thing she should off have done is to contact a Divorce Lawyer.. First Stop....

Edited November 4, 2009 by ImWaiting

[Igor&Veronika 1]

I posted a few weeks ago about situation my sister in-law got herself into.

In short, she came to US on a visitor visa back in July. Dated for a couple of weeks and married some slick guy against our will and her's better judgment.

She got married on September 28, 2009 to a permanent resident. He didn't file adjustment for her. As of yesterday they are finally apart and she wants somehow to file for divorce before she goes home to her country next week.

The guy looks like had a ADD since 9 year old (Attention deficit disorder) that started show itself off in the last week.

Question is what can she do either to divorce him or annul the marriage given that she is leaving the US next week?

Any suggestions will be greatly appreciated....

The first thing she should off have done is to contact a Divorce Lawyer.. First Stop....

That is understandable, but she is a poor girl without any financial resources.....

Aside from the lawyer what other options she has...She has no intent to seek his property or resources... She just wants to be free of marriage obligations.

Any suggestions?

Edited November 4, 2009 by Igor&Veronika

[rsn 135]

moving from K3 procedures to Effects of major family changes

[milimelo 4,237]

As far as I know she can buy and download a do-it-yourself divorce kit from the internet, fill it out, get him to sign and file with court.

[Igor&Veronika 1]

As far as I know she can buy and download a do-it-yourself divorce kit from the internet, fill it out, get him to sign and file with court.

Because of his mental state and issues he will not just sign the the paperwork for divorce. He call 100s of times a day and sends txt messages....

[Nanusia & Lukaszek 0]

As far as I know she can buy and download a do-it-yourself divorce kit from the internet, fill it out, get him to sign and file with court.

Because of his mental state and issues he will not just sign the the paperwork for divorce. He call 100s of times a day and sends txt messages....

First of all, if she's leaving in 1 week, she wont be able to divorce in that short amount of time. Some states require you to be seperated for one year before you can get divorced, she needs to research that, or you for her. If he's difficult, she should get legal assistance (some charities do it low cost, like Catholic Charities, some do it free) otherwise she wont be able to do much on her own with him resisting, and her not knowing the steps/process.

Depending on what city she's in (larger Russian population), some paid lawyers can help do the divorce and send her papers to sign or whatever they need to her in Russia.

[DoneWaiting 15]

If I am not mistaken, she is in NJ too? if so, maybe you want to look for grounds of annulment, but she needs more than a week and all this will cost her some $$$, unless she finds an pro bono law firm - Not sure if is NJ but that is what i gather from your profile.. here is a website you can see.. http://www.probononj.org/

Divorce, Separation, and Annulment

Divorce is the ending of a marriage ordered by a court. Annulment establishes that your marital status never existed. The court will declare that you were never married. Because the courts rarely grant an annulment, you should think twice about using this route if you want to end your marriage. The court may look to, but is not limited to, the legitimacy of children and the preservation of the sanctity of marriage. Because of these consideration a court will look to granting a divorce instead of an annulment.

Grounds for Divorce in NJ

There are three principal players involved in your marriage that will also be involved in your divorce: you, your spouse, and the state. You cannot simply break up, saddle your charger, and ride off into the sunset. Among other legal considerations, you have to give the state an acceptable reason why you should be allowed to break up. The reason is known as the ground for your divorce. Over the years each state has enacted legislation that governs acceptable grounds.

Any of the following grounds may be used for divorce in New Jersey:

no-fault: separation for 18 consecutive months (must be living in separate residences);

institutionalization for mental illness for at least 24 consecutive months;

deviant sexual conduct;

imprisonment for at least 18 months;

adultery (no time limit)

willful and continued desertion for at least 12 months;

habitual drunkenness or voluntary addiction;

extreme cruelty, either bodily or mental.

In New Jersey there are two types of annulment. In the first type the marriage is declared void ab initio, or from its inception, as though it had never existed. You do not legally have to go to court to have the marriage declared void ab initio, although it's a good idea to do so. In the case of an annulment, a marriage must be "totally void" in order for it to be considered annulled.

There are two characteristics of a "totally void" marriage:

the marriage posses some defect rendering it susceptible to collateral attack (some evidence that shows the marriage never happened or should have never happened) even after the death of one or both spouses; and

no direct step or proceeding to annul is necessary (although the latter may be desirable).

One such defect is if your spouse was formally married to someone else and still has not divorced that person. Your marriage to this spouse is considered totally void.

Another defective marriage is one done between "blood" relatives.

The second type of annulment is called "voidable". A voidable marriage can only be annulled by going to court and having it declared void. . Annulment is available in New Jersey, and in some cases it can be obtained under the name of a divorce. Along with obtaining an annulment for bigamy and for lack of consensual age, a marriage may be declared void if the parties did not really intend to marry or if they are incapacitated, as in insanity, intoxication, fraud, and duress. Although annulments may be granted, the preference of the court is not to annul, but for the parties to divorce. Also, any marriage that is expressly prohibited by statute is void by annulment.

Edited November 4, 2009 by ImWaiting

[beth 4]

tell her to just file the divorce. he has 20 days to reply for counter affidavit. if he didnt reply her request will be granted without a problem. you can just go to court and get a divorce packet.

[NutMagnet 2]

I posted a few weeks ago about situation my sister in-law got herself into.

In short, she came to US on a visitor visa back in July. Dated for a couple of weeks and married some slick guy against our will and her's better judgment.

She got married on September 28, 2009 to a permanent resident. He didn't file adjustment for her. As of yesterday they are finally apart and she wants somehow to file for divorce before she goes home to her country next week.

The guy looks like had a ADD since 9 year old (Attention deficit disorder) that started show itself off in the last week.

Question is what can she do either to divorce him or annul the marriage given that she is leaving the US next week?

Any suggestions will be greatly appreciated....

Seems that she has family in the USA that wants to control her life. Did the husband put a gun to her head and force her to marry him?

Since she has plans to go home next week. Let her go home. Make sure she keeps all her boarding passes, receipts and flight schedules. USA does not stamp passports when leaving the country. This may become important evidence later on.

""Because of his mental state and issues he will not just sign the the paperwork for divorce. He call 100s of times a day and sends txt messages...."

Cell phones are great for that. He loves his new wife and wants to talk to her. Apparently she is avoiding him and his txt messages 100's of times a day.

Bill Gates of Microsoft has ADD as well as many other successful people. It is easily managed even as an adult with inexpensive meds.

Obviously there is a big misunderstanding. She's a married girl now, I hope her family will support her regardless of her decisions.

Edited November 5, 2009 by NutMagnet

[NutMagnet 2]

she is a poor girl without any financial resources.....

She married an American! Just like winning the Lotto.

Apart from him, what about Igor&Veronika in USA who she was visiting when she met him and got married.

Edited November 5, 2009 by NutMagnet

[Igor&Veronika 1]

she is a poor girl without any financial resources.....

She married an American! Just like winning the Lotto.

Apart from him, what about Igor&Veronika in USA who she was visiting when she met him and got married.

She was visiting us....

And besides we never supported her decision from the very start. Not to mention that she got married behind our backs on a day we were suppose to return from vacation....

[Kim_G 4]

she is a poor girl without any financial resources.....

She married an American! Just like winning the Lotto.

Apart from him, what about Igor&Veronika in USA who she was visiting when she met him and got married.

She was visiting us....

And besides we never supported her decision from the very start. Not to mention that she got married behind our backs on a day we were suppose to return from vacation....

If your sister in-law just wants to get divorced and go back to her country, she can ask someone to take care of her court case. Her physical presence is not required, unless the divorce is contested. She can leave tomorrow and you could mail her a signed divorce judgment later on. Now, the more important issue is that her ADHD husband may not be willing to sign her divorce papers. That is a problem. If obtaining his signature is an impossible mission, then you shold look into divorce by publication. It is a complex procedure, but it might work. You sister in-law then would have to say to the court that she does not know where her spouse is, and that instead of serving him with summons, she is going to publish it (for extra $$) in the newspaper of the judge's choice. The only thing is that she would have to do a search with Board of Elections, DMV, and all branches of US Armed Forces and obtain certifciations from all the agencies saying that they have no record of this individual. With that pile of evidence, she may qualify for divorce by publication which will not require his signature.

my thoughts to you, find the way for him to sign her divorce papers. Much easier and cheaper option. If he is mentally incompetent (as one of Igor&Veronika's posts suggests) the court may appoint a person to represent his interests.

Edited November 6, 2009 by Kim_G

[NutMagnet 2]

she is a poor girl without any financial resources.....

She married an American! Just like winning the Lotto.

Apart from him, what about Igor&Veronika in USA who she was visiting when she met him and got married.

She was visiting us....

And besides we never supported her decision from the very start. Not to mention that she got married behind our backs on a day we were suppose to return from vacation....

If your sister in-law just wants to get divorced and go back to her country, she can ask someone to take care of her court case. Her physical presence is not required, unless the divorce is contested. She can leave tomorrow and you could mail her a signed divorce judgment later on. Now, the more important issue is that her ADHD husband may not be willing to sign her divorce papers. That is a problem. If obtaining his signature is an impossible mission, then you shold look into divorce by publication. It is a complex procedure, but it might work. You sister in-law then would have to say to the court that she does not know where her spouse is, and that instead of serving him with summons, she is going to publish it (for extra $$) in the newspaper of the judge's choice. The only thing is that she would have to do a search with Board of Elections, DMV, and all branches of US Armed Forces and obtain certifciations from all the agencies saying that they have no record of this individual. With that pile of evidence, she may qualify for divorce by publication which will not require his signature.

my thoughts to you, find the way for him to sign her divorce papers. Much easier and cheaper option. If he is mentally incompetent (as one of Igor&Veronika's posts suggests) the court may appoint a person to represent his interests.

I applaud the young woman trying to do the right thing and get a legal dissolution instead of going back to her country and pretend that it never happened.

Not familiar with the laws of their state, but since the marriage was recent, any possibility of getting an annulment instead? or at least starting the papers ASAP to cement a filing date before she leaves, and then follow up with the rest overseas?