How not to make love like a porn star

[spookyturtle 9,465]

ok, so what do female pornstars do that men actually don't like?

blowjobs that are more about how far you can get it in than anything else. a good ####### is so much more than that.

also, don't stick your fingers in your bunghole and open it wide for the screen. thats nasty.

oh and the only thing i want you doing with that fist is punching whoever came up with that idea in the face.

I like it when they stick their fingers in their bungholes.

[w¡n9Nµ7 §£@¥€r 123]

not me.

[IR5FORMUMSIE 850]

Last year when Babeland conducted a poll about sexual attitudes, one of the questions was, "The most inaccurate perception men have picked up from porn is ..." The top four responses from women were:

1. How women can have orgasm from just vaginal intercourse
2. The idea that women love semen in their faces
3. The notion that ####### sex is sexy
4. That women prefer huge cocks

They don't? Dammit, now what am I supposed to do?

Wake up and stop dreaming. You're hung like a hamster.

Actually, I'm not, I'm hung like an underdeveloped three-year-old.

ok, so what do female pornstars do that men actually don't like?

blowjobs that are more about how far you can get it in than anything else. a good ####### is so much more than that.

also, don't stick your fingers in your bunghole and open it wide for the screen. thats nasty.

oh and the only thing i want you doing with that fist is punching whoever came up with that idea in the face.

From inside?

[spookyturtle 9,465]

not me.

Then you probably don't like it when he pulls it out of her a$$ and she sucks on it either.

[IR5FORMUMSIE 850]

ok, so what do female pornstars do that men actually don't like?

blowjobs that are more about how far you can get it in than anything else. a good ####### is so much more than that.

also, don't stick your fingers in your bunghole and open it wide for the screen. thats nasty.

oh and the only thing i want you doing with that fist is punching whoever came up with that idea in the face.

I like it when they stick their fingers in their bungholes.

Looks classier than when they stick it up their noses.

[IR5FORMUMSIE 850]

not me.

Then you probably don't like it when he pulls it out of her a$ and she sucks on it either.

Now that the cold weather is imminent it must be time for snowballing.

[I AM NOT THAT GUY 5,715]

not me.

Then you probably don't like it when he pulls it out of her a$$ and she sucks on it either.

That is so not Kosher!

[spookyturtle 9,465]

not me.

Then you probably don't like it when he pulls it out of her a$ and she sucks on it either.

Now that the cold weather is imminent it must be time for snowballing.

I wonder if AJ likes to see cream pies

[scandal 951]

See that's what I'm talking about!

Bungholes.

That's the kind of sh!t I come to VJ OT for.

[one...two...tree 2,762]

How about phantom memories?

[웃 910]

You guys seen this one yet:

[I AM NOT THAT GUY 5,715]

You guys seen this one yet:

Isn't that the pornstart that ran for governor of California? What was her name?

[IR5FORMUMSIE 850]

not me.

Then you probably don't like it when he pulls it out of her a$ and she sucks on it either.

That is so not Kosher!

Depends on whether or not the guy is circumsized.

[scandal 951]

not me.

Then you probably don't like it when he pulls it out of her a$ and she sucks on it either.

That is so not Kosher!

Depends on whether or not the guy is circumsized.

It's ok as long as you don't slap any butter on it.

[IR5FORMUMSIE 850]

You guys seen this one yet:

Isn't that the pornstart that ran for governor of California? What was her name?

Mary Carey. Took so much ####### that she tore up her sphincter, which means you'll be navigating the chocolate highway all the time. She wears diapers now apparently.