Just Feeling Like Crap...

[jmwprof03 0]

You know, I am feeling a couple different ways right now: 1) I feel like I used to feel the day after Christmas when i was a kid...coming down off of an adreneline (and sugar) high and depressed because the day you had been waiting for all year was finished for another 365 days. I guess it is melancholic in a sort of way because I am in love, but also saddened because I am fully aware that this process is so damn long. And, I am not sure what to do about it. 2) I feel like my insides are a cyclone circling over the Bermuda Triangle and the basketball sized ball of emotion I have bouncing around inside of me and at any moment it is going to spew out in the form of tears, laughter, anger...well, you get the point. Here's the thing, we do everything we are supposed to do: we talk, we webcam, we share the little things, we eat meals together, we throw a few drinks back together...essentially, we do everything a "normal" couple does except stand in the same room together. But, sometimes even all of that effort doesn't work. Today...well, today is one of those days, I suppose. I am just "down in the dumps". Ok, enough self pity for me.

...just needed to blow off some steam... *tooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooot*

[aussiewench 9]

*hugs* We are all with ya.

[William33 110]

We are all here for this purpose - to understand, to find reason in this sh!tstorm and to vent. You are not alone in your feelings. Think ahead to the "approval" party we will have here!!!

In the meantime, vent away!!

I am getting ready to call my Fiance, again........... I enjoy very much talking with her on the phone, but IN PERSON is what we want and deserve.

Hang in there. We are all trying to do just that.

[Lizzy 0]

Oh i hear ya........ it was pretty damm hard when i was away from Steve, it took 9 months for me to get the visa....

I even once slept while the webcam was on once, i felt a bit silly so that was the end of that, but we did all the above your talking about.

There was even some days, i would cry at him to 'sort it out, i cant take this anymore'

But...we did it, im here at last, yes it was worth every tear, every argument, every loss, everything, justb to be here now, with Steve, for good.....priceless.

Good luck, take care of yourself.

[drelewis 0]

Hang in there this is so tough for everyone. What helps me is getting into a routine. Like i know i can speak to her at say 12pm then she works so i know i will talk later etc sometimes seeing her and doing too much talking upsets me more. Rather get on with my day and try not to worry about everything, much like you would in a normal relationship.

I am in the final stages now and can see the light at the end of a very dark tunnel. You will get her too someday soon i promise!!

Peace

[dwar49 0]

Everyone in this long que line is having the same issues. Dont worry about venting and or ranting when needed. My fiancee and I are lucky as we both have high speed internet and webcams so we can at least talk and see each other daily, but it is a bittersweet joy when all we want to do is be together.

Hang in there, and feel free to scream and shout. (I find punching my couch helps!)

[vartan 0]

Yeah .. venting is fine I think we all need to sometimes.. I have a routine too.. since our time difference is 14 hours.. She calls to wake me up and we talk until I go to work.. we email for a few hours before she goes to sleep and then I call when I get off work and wake her up and talk until I need to sleep. It works but I get frustrated easily I am a very impatient person and don't like to see her away from me.. Since we moved in together before she had to leave my house has all her things that remind me of her which drives me nuts.. Plus she had been here in the states for almost 8 years, since she went back to Taiwan she doesn't really have many people to entertain her there and I hate to see her bored and upset and wanting to come back.. Grrr.. I feel your venting.. there is my vent..

[no name 1]

After a week of straight touching that ended 7/8 I feel your pain. I can't stand no approvals coming out of CSC, so I could at least TRY to see a pattern...

[seldi 1]

I know how you feel. I'm starting to loose my patience and I don't know who to talk to about it. If I say anything about it here, I get bitched at for being a selfish ####### and not thinking about those who applied 460 months ago and I only applied nearly 2 months ago.

I'm sorry that some of you have been waiting since March. I didn't know this was going to take so long, I didn't know there were delays, I didn't know it would take longer than expected. My petition has been ready since March, but I decided to wait a little bit before applying because I didn't want to rush. I wanted to go spend Christmas with him and then fly together since he's never flown before. A friend of mine had been trhough the same process in 2005 and it took them less than a month to get their NOA2 from Vermont as well. So I did tons of research and decided that it would be best to wait until around June to apply, to make sure he had enough time to get everything ready to move here. So my completed I-129F just sat there for 3 months.

We have been doing the "reunited, seperated" dance since 1998. This Christmas, that dance will not take place, even if I have to be the one to pack everything and go.

*end rant*

Thank you.

[Qiao - 108 days 0]

You know, I am feeling a couple different ways right now: 1) I feel like I used to feel the day after Christmas when i was a kid...coming down off of an adreneline (and sugar) high and depressed because the day you had been waiting for all year was finished for another 365 days. I guess it is melancholic in a sort of way because I am in love, but also saddened because I am fully aware that this process is so damn long. And, I am not sure what to do about it. 2) I feel like my insides are a cyclone circling over the Bermuda Triangle and the basketball sized ball of emotion I have bouncing around inside of me and at any moment it is going to spew out in the form of tears, laughter, anger...well, you get the point. Here's the thing, we do everything we are supposed to do: we talk, we webcam, we share the little things, we eat meals together, we throw a few drinks back together...essentially, we do everything a "normal" couple does except stand in the same room together. But, sometimes even all of that effort doesn't work. Today...well, today is one of those days, I suppose. I am just "down in the dumps". Ok, enough self pity for me.

...just needed to blow off some steam... *tooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooot*

I know how you feel, and if you cannot vent here, where could you? I am sure that there are plenty of folks here on VJ that know the exact emotions that you are feeling. I spend as much time as possible talking to my fiance. I even did some seriously geeky stuff to make it possible for us to play a game together that we both enjoy. We used webcams, and last month I logged over 1800 minutes on the phone to China. In spite of all of the things that we do, there is always a feeling of emptiness...

For me the feelings are less intense some times more than others, but some days it is pretty darn lonely.

[Alex+R 0]

I know how you feel. I'm starting to loose my patience and I don't know who to talk to about it. If I say anything about it here, I get bitched at for being a selfish ####### and not thinking about those who applied 460 months ago and I only applied nearly 2 months ago.

I'm sorry that some of you have been waiting since March. I didn't know this was going to take so long, I didn't know there were delays, I didn't know it would take longer than expected. My petition has been ready since March, but I decided to wait a little bit before applying because I didn't want to rush. I wanted to go spend Christmas with him and then fly together since he's never flown before. A friend of mine had been trhough the same process in 2005 and it took them less than a month to get their NOA2 from Vermont as well. So I did tons of research and decided that it would be best to wait until around June to apply, to make sure he had enough time to get everything ready to move here. So my completed I-129F just sat there for 3 months.

We have been doing the "reunited, seperated" dance since 1998. This Christmas, that dance will not take place, even if I have to be the one to pack everything and go.

*end rant*

Thank you.

I hear that rant. Here's my similar one. I was ready to apply for the K-1 in January. I had it all filled out (although now I know it wasn't a perfect application because I hadn't found VJ then) and I overnighted it to my mother (since the K1 has to come from within the US and I was living in Brazil). Ultimately we decided to wait til I was in the US on the advice of my grandma, a former immigration official, who I now know has no idea what she is talking about.

THEN we decided it might be good for him to get a student/intern visa for a year, so I went home in April, and his visa was denied in May (and doubley denied in June) because of a forms mix-up at the consulate. Grr. THEN we had to wait for the new I-129F. THEN we filed. Seven months after we intended to originally. If I'd only found VJ before he'd be here right now.

So I will spend New Years with him, and I will stay until his visa is issued. Goddammit.

[vartan 0]

Yeah I could have married my fiance while she was here on a student visa but we both thought it would be better for me to meet her parents first.. and now here we are .. waiting. she is being way more patient then me.

Maybe a little note to help you all, at least we have what we have.. I say this yet I find it hard to believe.. My parents met (penpals no internet then).. My dad went to visit my mom but had to go home because his visa was going to expire.. it took them 2 years to finish the paperwork and in the mean time all they had was letters.. foriegn travel was very expensive, there was no such thing as phone cards, and no internet.. They persevered and so can we..

[Milka 0]

I wish you much luck for the future. It will work out.

[texasseoul 0]

You know, I am feeling a couple different ways right now: 1) I feel like I used to feel the day after Christmas when i was a kid...coming down off of an adreneline (and sugar) high and depressed because the day you had been waiting for all year was finished for another 365 days. I guess it is melancholic in a sort of way because I am in love, but also saddened because I am fully aware that this process is so damn long. And, I am not sure what to do about it. 2) I feel like my insides are a cyclone circling over the Bermuda Triangle and the basketball sized ball of emotion I have bouncing around inside of me and at any moment it is going to spew out in the form of tears, laughter, anger...well, you get the point. Here's the thing, we do everything we are supposed to do: we talk, we webcam, we share the little things, we eat meals together, we throw a few drinks back together...essentially, we do everything a "normal" couple does except stand in the same room together. But, sometimes even all of that effort doesn't work. Today...well, today is one of those days, I suppose. I am just "down in the dumps". Ok, enough self pity for me.

...just needed to blow off some steam... *tooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooot*

Realize that the power of your love is far stronger than any time and distance. This is a marathon and not a sprint, so exercise patience and understanding. I agree with you and feel the same way many days. By my concious self keeps reminding me how fast time does move and before we know it, the finish line will be here.

Hang in there and VJ is a great place to get the support we all need to make it through this journey.

[CarolineM 0]

But...we did it, im here at last, yes it was worth every tear, every argument, every loss, everything, justb to be here now, with Steve, for good.....priceless.

Absolutely what I was going to say!! It is so worth it.

hang in there.