Third K1 Visa

[Cortr 3]

Oh, so -this- is the thread where all the drama goes down. I've been looking for it!

I suggest everyone live and let live. We all have our skeletons in our closets, and none of us is perfect. Except maybe the O.P. That guy is choice. (just kidding)

Judge not, lest ye be judged.

[YMALIA 0]

I've noticed alot of discussion regarding filing a second K1 visa within two years of the first, and how the US CIS mistakes "beneficiary" for "petition". What I'm curious about is the two per lifetime K1 visa sponsorship limit. It seems that the wavier for that should only be granted if a previous beneficiary dies (or a female is abused by a previous beneficiary), at least, that's the impression i get reading the forms & internal memo. I've read the GAO report that states most K1 waivers are granted, but that's for the two-year rule if I'm reading it correctly. Is there any information regarding someone who's actually willing to risk a third round of Russian Roulette? I mean, even felons get three strikes, we get only two?

Mind you, this is purely of intellectual interest to me. I have no intention of going down the aisle again, regardless of her citizenship.

I had my 3rd approved and it was within 2 years of the 2nd approval. The first 2 girls had backed out on me and never made it here to the US (they were 19 yrs old and this had most to do with it). This time it was me who backed out on this 3rd one, and she went back to the Philippines. Im still hoping to find a filipina wife cause I just cant meet the kind of woman I want here. So I may be looking for my 4th petition some day, perhpas sooner than later. Im just havent been ready to give my search any effort yet. Maybe Ill be the first 4th petition IMBRA test case here. If so, Ill be sure to let everyone know how it goes. If I could only find a 30 to 36 yr old woman in the states who isnt overweight, carrying baggage from previous marriages, and who doesnt care how much money I make, then I just might not need to look overseas for marriage.

then good luck for you. i confuse for the 3rd girl why you back off? does she overweight plus extra baggage? that suck

[Chi-town 1]

Oh, so -this- is the thread where all the drama goes down. I've been looking for it!

I suggest everyone live and let live. We all have our skeletons in our closets, and none of us is perfect. Except maybe the O.P. That guy is choice. (just kidding)

Judge not, lest ye be judged.

First of all this is a very emotionally demanding process, made even worse by time and distance. For those who are multiple filers because previous attempts at happiness have gone up in flames, good luck this time. If you consider the number of engagements broken in the general populace (where there is not even close to the same demands on the couple) seeing multiple K-1 filings is really not that suprising. To those who have been caught up in the rules and regs designed to protect the ones we love and hope to bring to the US, I also hope you can set aside the frustration and accept the reason these rules are there in the first place. People come to this site for help, not for being judged. If you don't have any advice or support to give, then shut it, your part of the problem not the solution.

[Anastassia 0]

I can't believe this is still going on..... I was here in December 08...... LOL.... good job....

Has Steve55 found a 4th candidate yet ?

[Brad and Vika 129]

I can't believe this is still going on..... I was here in December 08...... LOL.... good job....

Has Steve55 found a 4th candidate yet ?

I don't think he has checked back in lately.

[Corinthians 7]

your part of the problem not the solution.

What if you like being part of the problem?

[steve55 0]

I suppose American men have managed to completely avoid the materialism that has infected american culture instead of perpetuating it themselves

Why are American men waiting until middle age to have children anyway? I think therein may lie the reason why this board has so many American women who have looked abroad for their husbands

Dude, you are so freakin missing the point!! Yes, men in the West have become accustomed to the modernities, and yes, we also want nice things, ....BUT, we men dont judge or choose whom we will love and date based on how much money the woman makes! And the men dont ###### to their wife that she isnt making enough money or contributing enough such that he will divorce or leave her! American woman do all these things! They want to much $$ out of the man. Men love for love, American woman (in general) choose who they will date and love based on his income or job status. Now, I know that NOT ALL american/Wetsern woman do this, (for example, country ladies tend to be far less materialitic and more down to earth) but you bet that most have some degree of this sick artificiality in them. Foreign ladies dont do this, or not even close to as often as American woman do. Herein lies the difference.

FOreign ladies dont demand stuff or feel entitled to everything, American ladies in general do.

[steve55 0]

Ok...after reading this thread, and as an American woman...I have come to one simple conclusion for the OP. He is SO in love with the Phillipines culture and women and SO completely downgraded American women with his simplistic (and stereotypical) generalizations, I think there is only ONE solution that makes any sense.

He should immigrate to the Phillipines. There he can shop in person and perhaps find, one, two or twenty perfect, subservient, mousy women to choose from. However, I suspect that at some point he will discover that they too have "flaws" and will decide NONE of them in the WHOLE country can possibly meet his "requirements" and look in a whole other country!

Maybe we can even start a fund to help him pay for his plane ticket as we ALL know American women must be swimming in the money their "men" provide for them.

GIVE ME A BREAK OP.....GENERALIZE MUCH?

I am sure all of us dominating, fat and demanding American women would be HAPPY to let you leave our bi*chy clutches.

-Blu-(just saying)

-----------------------

Just want to add that Steve55 is not the OP, but I think he's the one you're responding to.

Oops, guess i have more things to add.Reading the entire thread has led to this....

1. I got a weird feeling about him after reading all his posts; someone else used the word 'predator' referring to him and that is what he appears to be to me too.

I don't have a 19yr daughter or any children but I wouldn't want one having anything to do with a person like him. That is purely a 'feeling' response but I have the utmost sympathy for any inexperienced young filipina who got involved with him and then realized what life in the U.S. would be like with him. It seems like he targets as being most desireable the ones who would have least ability to protect themselves while he can still point and say 'look, it's legal'. Ick. Hope there are lots of protective fathers and mums.

2. I believe he said in a post having a young wife is desireable also because he wants a wife young enough to have children with but how would he support a wife AND a child (or children) on a salary that low in the US. Let's be practical here, any woman who is rational and wants children IS going to look at earning capacity of the couple as a whole if she is a responsible mother. If she's not working then 18k a year isn't going to cut it. If she IS working it better be enough to cover living expenses and child care costs, cause for some reason his own posts lead me to believe that stevie does not like to take part in traditional female home life activity so I doubt stay at home child raising is something in his sphere of activity. I know some very successful marriages with stay at home dads, but the women in those marriages are anything but humble and running scared at broken appliances.

I'm not saying a salary of 18k makes a person a loser , because frankly if you're happy doing that job for life than that's great.There are lots of great fun jobs out there that don't pay much. But if you think it is rational for a woman who wants to have a happy marriage with children to WANT to marry you at that total income per year in the U.S. than I think you should wake up. They are not being materialistic or selfish. They are being realistic and thinking ahead to what is best for the children. Not even for themselves, but for the Children.

I honestly don't understand how you can set up such an ideal type of woman and not be willing to work harder or get a second job or education in order to attract the type you claim you want instead of laying blame on others for not being what is irrational to be in the first part.

It's almost .. well no. it's not almost.. there's a strong sense of your being angry at american women for not wanting what is in all practical terms 'second rate quality' in a future husband and father. So you sling mud at american women and say you need a phillipina. And that's a terrible and undeserved put down on phillipine women.

Surely you can see from a woman's viewpoint from the outside that a 40ish year old man actively seeking 19 and 20 yr old foreign subservient type women and who is only making 18k a year and wants nothing more is odd.Why post verbal slings against american women for behaving in a rational manner? Just looks more creepy that you have such anger and spitefulness in your posts, and yes they do read that way as a whole. I don't remember anything about love in them, only about how the woman should behave.

I realize I'm heavily biased. I'm an american born daughter of 2 very hard working german immigrants. I was taught to work hard at home and at my job and to look for that along with love in order to have a successful marriage. Sounds a little cold? Hellno, I'm in deep and passionate love with my wonderful fiance AND I know I have a partner for life; not a servant afraid I'll hold the money supply hostage to their behaviour.

Last note, Feminism does not mean women over men, it means equal treatment disregarding gender. It's sad that so many people have twisted the word into something else. It's ironic that it is so often used to imply fanaticism when it is meant to define the opposite.

Wow, you h ave it so completely backwards. Many assumptions here. First of all, I tend to like shy , demure, more innocent and perhaps vulnerable types because I like the idea of "TAKING CARE" of someone, of helping someone to have a chance at a much better life with a descent caring guy like myself and hopefully a better job than what she might find in her country. If I can help provide that with someone I love, then that's even better. I am not at all seeking a "subserviant" woman. LOL. Im a 50/50 guy in house chores etc. In fact, there is nothing Id enjoy more helping a young woman come here and support her to go to school, get job training, find a great job so she can send money back home to help her family. There is something cute and attractive with younger more i nnocent woman who arent yet so hardened by life as we all get as we get older. But, it doesnt mean Im limiting myself to 19-21 yr olds, and in fact, Ive had such bad experiences thus far with that age range that Im seeking older woman 25-34 now. The young girls just dont seem ready to settle down and I learned this lesson the hard way. Young or old, doesnt matter at thispoint as long as you fall in love.

And I dont make $18K per year but Im saying if a guy makes $18k and she makes $18K, well, its enough to pay rent and other basic bills. If he only makes $18K and she cant work, then I agree, they should not become a couple, especially if having kids as $18K /yr probably isnt enough for basic living. What I am against american woman for is that most(NOT ALL!!), but most, expect a guy to make $40K + per year. This is freakin rediculous expectations. Why cant you american woman be accepting of a man makes $20K per yr and then the wife can work and make $20K per year (or m ore) and you both live off of $40K per year?? Im just saying, it should be more about love than about what money he makes. I have found that foreign ladies do not care what the man makes!! PERIOD!! I dont get probed by foreign ladies and I can see they dont demand or expect a certain "material lifestyle" that American woman expect. This much is clear and its why I think that most (Not all!!) american woman are artificial and mainly look at men as a economics vehicle. They love money and having material things more than loving the man for who he is.

Edited October 10, 2009 by steve55

[steve55 0]

I just think it's sad that several replies seem to indicate fiances chosen based on their culture or country of origin.

I take this path for love, I certainly wouldn't do this for "fun". I know my fiance and I know what I'm getting into. Just. Wow.

YOu are right. It is sad.

I wish I didnt have to be forced to look overseas for a wife. I wish I could find a american woman who doesnt choose who she dates based on a man's income, and who is young enough to have kids and yet still willing to date a man my age(as American woman are age sensitive, most dont go more than 4 years older than them) ,and who doesnt have kids already(within the age whgo are willing to date someone my age) and who isnt overweight. The overweight part knocks out 70% of the candidates as I really have yet to find myself attracted to large or overweight woman. Plus, it is near impossible for me to meet woman unless I want to go to bars and clubs. I go to church singles maybe, but they lump me in the 38-40+ age group,...NO THANKS! I do want a few kids thank you. This country makes it hard to meet people cause we drive in cars and seclude ourselves, we dont even know our neighbors. Its n ot easy meeting other singles here.

Yes, it is sad indeed. Its sad that woman here are materialitisc, mostly overweight, and are age bias. So yes, I do have to look overseas in order to find woman. And you can indeed look in one country or culture , even the relationship experts say there is a match for all of us in every culture. It doesnt matter what culture you are looking in. Heck, if I happen to luck out and meet a woman here in the USA, then great, Ill be happy to go with it. But it aint likley for reasons already stated above.

[steve55 0]

I can't believe I actually managed to read all 25 pages of this thread within 2 days.

While a handful of VJ members are hoping the thread will die (and I am sure it will just die a natural death lol), I read it through hoping to see a comment similar to what my husband had made about Steve55's experience.

It may be naive of me to think it, but I am hoping Steve55's experience would be a cautionary tale to those attempting to start their visa journey: before you even attempt to clog up this already busy immigration system, think twice about who you want to bring to the U.S. as your spouse or as your fiance(e).

My husband and I are somewhat disappointed that people like Steve55 have managed to get 3 approved K1 visas within a relatively short period of time...in contrast, people like Rick and I are still languishing in USCIS/NVC/Consulate hell...separated because for now we have to be...while waiting for the end of our journey. It is an agonizing wait, and right now, so many other things are happening in our lives that we are desperately trying to deal with as husband and wife while living so far away from each other.

We have tried to rationalize how cases get processed and adjudicated and I tell you, we are at a loss...just looking at the VJ Immigration Timelines and Igor's List tells the story. There are members in the same service center as we are (from the Philippines) who have received their NOA2s already --- some have filed way before we have, and some AFTER we have. In the meantime, we are clinging onto every hope we can...waiting for that one e-mail that will tell us when Rick and I can be reunited, never to be apart again.

Thanks for listening...on our part, we can do nothing but hope and pray. Good luck to us all.

P.S.

I guess part of the frustration stems from the fact that I am currently working for a Canadian immigration consulting firm here in the Philippines, and all this not knowing where we are in the process is becoming quite maddening. I know I can't compare the two systems, however, knowing where we are in the process would certainly ease our minds through the wait.

Well, since yoru happiness(or others happiness) is so much more important than mine, I guess I should just give up then and resort myself to a lonely life of singlehood, while I sit in some USCIS lifetime penalty box. The first 2 fiances backed out on me, not me on them. Yet , Im somehow the bad guy. NICE!!

[steve55 0]

As for posting your wife's weight and bmi.....it's just plain creepy. It is like you are considering a car purchase rather than describing someone that is suppose to be your love.

Yes, it makes it sound like one is calculating her miles per gallon ratio. But that's just me.

OMG Che!!!

I just wonder if anyone who posts obsessively about their spouses looks realizes how that makes said spouse look? Can you spell piece of meat? Mind you, I am all about the pretty; but I married the redhead for a myriad other reasons.

Toma1, no worries. LOL. These people attacking you just cant handle the TRUTH! The truth is something that every relationship expert and pshychologist says is a requirement for every successful relationship, and that is sexual/physical attractiveness to your mate. Now beauty is in the eye of the beholder, I understand that, but lets be real here, how many men (as science has proven men tend to be visual creatures) are sexually attracted to overweight woman??? Think about that one for a second and get back to me.

It makes me sick how political correctness is so rampant that it overides uncomfortable truths. Men in general are not attracted to overweight woman, and in fact, many woman are not attracted to overweight men, which is fine!! And fact is, American woman are fat. Maybe 20% are not . Yet you guys jump on Toma1 for pointing out fact and truth and even twist it into accusing him of only loving his wife for her phyisical looks and then INSULTING his wife AND CALLING HER A PIECE OF MEAT. You people should leave family out of your insults ok? Family and spouses are off limits in any tid for tats.

This silly political correctness reminds me of airport security patting down 75 yr old grandmas, or reminds me of laws that dont allow the FBI to do extra scrutiny with security checks on middle eastern travelers boarding airplanes. Its ignorance that arises out of the fact that people CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!! It will often make them uncomfortable.

Edited October 10, 2009 by steve55

[Ban Hammer 12,878]

:dance: :dance: he's back! :dance: :dance:

[toma1 10]

It makes me sick how political correctness is so rampant that it overides uncomfortable truths. Men in general are not attracted to overweight woman, and in fact, many woman are not attracted to overweight men, which is fine!! And fact is, American woman are fat. Maybe 20% are not . Yet you guys jump on Toma1 for pointing out fact and truth and even twist it into accusing him of only loving his wife for her phyisical looks and then INSULTING his wife AND CALLING HER A PIECE OF MEAT. You people should leave family out of your insults ok? Family and spouses are off limits in any tid for tats.

Thanks Steve. Actually, those silly comments are so NOT my wife that anyone that knows her would have found them to be ludicrous. And as a point of correction, I said, "There is no sense singling out American women. AMERICANS are too fat, and that applies to both women AND men." I'm not sure why or how they twisted that into applying only to women.

In any event, here is a study that makes your point, just one of a number that I have seen over the years.

http://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/20...men-marry-money

HOWEVER, I will say that I am a man, and perhaps... just as bad?

I only dated (at least on a regular basis) successful women when I was in Thailand. My wife had her own home in the country (which she designed), a condo in Bangkok, and two cars (one at each location) before I ever met her. (And NONE of which she got from her parents.) She was a graduate of the best med school in Thailand. And I thought all of that was fantastic! Does that mean I wanted her money? No... I make well into the 6-figures and don't need it. But I took those things as signs that she was intelligent, self-motivated and disciplined. She also happened to be in-shape and attractive, which--as I pointed out--I consider to be very important as well. (In-shape is a given in Thailand, though.)

I knew that a successful woman would be intellectually interesting as well as physically attractive. I also could be sure that I wasn't just the first willing "meal ticket" to come along. In fact, my wife's lifestyle was not substantially improved by marrying me. Frankly, if she wanted huge sums of money, she had at least two options to marry (that I know of) that would have made her fabulously wealthy by any standard.

(That said, I would have no problem with my job and salary being ONE of her reasons for marrying me, and I have no doubt that they were some form of measuring stick for her the same as hers were for me).

[Brad and Vika 129]

:dance: :dance: he's back! :dance: :dance:

[steve55 0]

(That said, I would have no problem with my job and salary being ONE of her reasons for marrying me, and I have no doubt that they were some form of measuring stick for her the same as hers were for me).

And that's fine, a person's job status, income, and career success are perfectly fine as being one of the many reasons that play a role in who you choose to date or marry. But man, most american woman take it way too far. For them, income is the #1 reason (often only reason) they choose who they will date or marry. Even the dallas morning news here in my city had an article confirming this issue with woman in dallas, Dr laura Schlessinger has even affirmed this fact on her talk show,(as she was comparing this to woman of other cultures) and I have too many guy freinds and co workerss who agree. Again, NOT ALL american woman do this, but by far and large, most are $$ worshipers and put it at the top spot of their reasons for being with a man. One of my long time friends said she only dates men who are $60K + career earners. I always had a feeeling she might be that way and one day she finally admitted it and I never cared to be firends with her ever since. Its sick!! I just think it is really lame. Meanwhile, Im left looking for that sparse 25% who truly dont care about a man's income, and then that 25% who are not overweight, and that 25% between 30-35 who will date someone my age (due to age bias here that doesnt exist in most foreign cultures) and you widdle all that down, the odds get really super slim Ill find someone here in the states. I just happen to adore filipinas more than most cultures butIm open to any culture if its the right girl.

Edited October 10, 2009 by steve55