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Donal78

Beginning to feel homesick and just basically fed up not been able to work

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Hi,

I just want to know how do people cope been on their own while your partner works and your waiting for the EAD to come.

I have been here since march 7th due to pre wedding commitments. We got married april 21st and had such a wonderfull day. My family were here for a week and my parents two weeks.

My wife works long hours in her job. Im basically alone for 8 hours every day. We struggle because i cant work and its frustrating as the money is way better in MA in computer support than what i earned back home in ireland. Im about to send in the greencard forms as we had problems getting tax clearance forms from the accountant. So thats another 3 months before i can legally work.

I miss ireland, i miss my family. I miss living in a city. I miss just meeting up with friends and having a few beers in a good old irish pub. There are lots of things i miss which makes it even harder. I havent met one irish person here since we moved over. We have friends but we only see them at the weekend as their lives are just as busy. To top it all off we are living with my wifes parents until i can work and then buy our own house. We live in the middle of nowhere in NH.

But you know what i love my wife and this struggle is only short term. We made the decision to move from ireland to the US.


I-751 - Removal of conditions

10-20-2008 - Sent package via usps - overnite mail

10-22-2008 - Package received and signed.

10-28-2008 - Cheque cashed

12-02-2008 - Biometrics in Boston

10-03-2009 - Transferred to CSV

10-04-2009 - 10 year GC on the way

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My thoughts are with you. It was a difficult transition for my husband. We also live in the middle of nowhere and he was from the city. He would have started working the 2nd day he was here if he could have. Basically, we came up with things for him to do around the house, had friends and family drive him places, had him do research about jobs and such on the internet. He was still somewhat depressed. I know it was very hard for him. He is doing much better now that he is working and has a driver's licence (and car). Just remember that it is only a short part of your life and you will soon be at a better place. Hope things get better for you soon. My thoughts are with you.


Met on internet 6/04. Married at court house in Aba, Nigeria 12/04. 3/05 traditional ceremony in Nigeria w/ my picture. 12/05 finally together again. 4/06 ceremony/celebration in the states together

I 130

1/10/05-sent

2/11/05-NOA1

5/30-touch

6/16-rep contact

6/27-Approved

7/?/05-ds3032/i864 bill generated

7/22/05-sent payment $70

8/1/05-IV visa bill generated

8/11/05-sent bill overnight

8/20/05- rec. 864 packet

8/25/05- nvc rec. IV bill

8/29/05-overnight 864

9/6/05-rec. ds230 (waiting on husband info)

9/28/05-sent ds230

9/29/05-ds230 rec

11/9/05 RFE for orig. birth cert.

11/9/05-sent origional

11/29/05 case complete-abandoned for k-3

129f

3/2/05 sent 3/15/04 noa 1 6/17/05 touched

6/20/05 touched 6/29/05 -heard approved on phone

7/21/05 - husband got packet/interview date at consulate

12/15/05- visa Approved!

12/20/05 picked up visa

AOS

1/9/06 mailed AOS & EAD

1/18/06 NOA 1 AOS and EAD

2/8/06 received appt. notice for bio

2/2/06 EAD touched

2/22/06 EAD touched

3/6/06 apt. date for both bio.

3/7/06 AOS/EAD touched

3/10/06 EAD on it's way

3/14/06 received EAD

3/20/06 filed for ssn

3/28/06 rec ssn

5/10/06 rec noa for AOS interview on June 26

6/22/06 found out pregnant- So happy!!!!

6/26/06 interview-Officer led us to believe we'd have card soon

7/8/06 e-mail stating welcome letter on it's way!

7/13/06 rec. Green card. Yipee!!

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The 1st few months can be frustrating, but the best thing to remember is that everything will come to you, it just takes patience. After all, it takes time to set up a new life anywhere. We'removing back to Ireland and know it'll be awhile before we're on our feet and that's just the day to day things...stocking up on groceries, getting utilities sorted, new electronics etc. But isn't it some adventure!!!

With my new found spare time, I studied for the PRAXIS exams (teaching licensure required in some states) and Art History I hadn't covered in Ireland. I found this made my days go faster and it was interesting too. You said you work in IT, my husband does too, so I know that certain qualifications are looked upon favorably...Cisco, Microsoft. How about studying for something like that...you may never have the free time to devote to it again :)

It must be hard living with you in-laws, but imagine the day when that's a distant memory...happy days! The culture here is very different and that's hard to become accustomed to, but you'll surprise yourself by how much you become used to it and become fond of it. You'll wake up one day and find that you love hazlenut creamer in your coffee, Peeps, how the ads are often better than the tv shows, biting your nails in the last second of a basketball game...even if that last second can last over 2 minutes with time-outs!! It will happen to you and you won't even realsie it.

How about a trip to Boston for a weekend? There are LOADS of Irish bars and Irish people there...try Southie, Downtown, Brighton...(I've 2 uncles living there, but they're not into the Irish bar scene there, they say it's too many drunkards). I love the American bars with pool tables now...sometimes a change is as good as a rest! But the Downtown Boston Irish bars are suppossed to be pretty cool.

The best advice I can give, is that it does get easier...I found driving here helped enormously!! and it does get better and, as you said, it is only short term.

I wish you and your wife all the best in the coming years and hope everything works out great!

Amanda


03.04.2009......Posted I-130 to U.S. Embassy

03.04.2009......Ordered Police Certificate for Visa Purposes from Local Garda Office (ordered over the phone)

03.05.2009......I-130 received at Embassy

03.06.2009......Received Police Cert

03.18.2009......I-130 Approved

09.10.2009......Medical Exam

09.23.2009......Embassy receives Notice of Readiness

10.13.2009......Received our interview date

10.29.2009......Successful interview!

11.5.2009........Visa received in post

11.7.2009........All the family flew to the US together :)

12.20.2009......Received Welcome to America letter

12.24.2009......10 year Greencard received in the mail

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Thank you amanda,

We are actually heading into boston early saturday morning to catch the FA cup final in mcganns pubs.I have support liverpool since i was 7 so i wouldnt miss this game for the world.

Everything you say is so true. Im actually going to start the microsoft MCSA course on monday. I just need to get back into the whole studying routine again but financially its well worth it. I just need to let it all out really as sometimes it gets frustrating but as they say time is a virture.

Patience is the key. As i keep telling myself and my wife the short term future will be a struggle but long term things will be great. Thank you again for the advice mandy.

The 1st few months can be frustrating, but the best thing to remember is that everything will come to you, it just takes patience. After all, it takes time to set up a new life anywhere. We'removing back to Ireland and know it'll be awhile before we're on our feet and that's just the day to day things...stocking up on groceries, getting utilities sorted, new electronics etc. But isn't it some adventure!!!

With my new found spare time, I studied for the PRAXIS exams (teaching licensure required in some states) and Art History I hadn't covered in Ireland. I found this made my days go faster and it was interesting too. You said you work in IT, my husband does too, so I know that certain qualifications are looked upon favorably...Cisco, Microsoft. How about studying for something like that...you may never have the free time to devote to it again :)

It must be hard living with you in-laws, but imagine the day when that's a distant memory...happy days! The culture here is very different and that's hard to become accustomed to, but you'll surprise yourself by how much you become used to it and become fond of it. You'll wake up one day and find that you love hazlenut creamer in your coffee, Peeps, how the ads are often better than the tv shows, biting your nails in the last second of a basketball game...even if that last second can last over 2 minutes with time-outs!! It will happen to you and you won't even realsie it.

How about a trip to Boston for a weekend? There are LOADS of Irish bars and Irish people there...try Southie, Downtown, Brighton...(I've 2 uncles living there, but they're not into the Irish bar scene there, they say it's too many drunkards). I love the American bars with pool tables now...sometimes a change is as good as a rest! But the Downtown Boston Irish bars are suppossed to be pretty cool.

The best advice I can give, is that it does get easier...I found driving here helped enormously!! and it does get better and, as you said, it is only short term.

I wish you and your wife all the best in the coming years and hope everything works out great!

Amanda


I-751 - Removal of conditions

10-20-2008 - Sent package via usps - overnite mail

10-22-2008 - Package received and signed.

10-28-2008 - Cheque cashed

12-02-2008 - Biometrics in Boston

10-03-2009 - Transferred to CSV

10-04-2009 - 10 year GC on the way

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Yeap been there... I know it frustrating staying home, not be able to earn ay money for the couple... And be alone..

Also I was in Galway for 5 years where i had a lot of friends, where you just wlak into the street knowing someone and going for a good old Irish pint... Without planning anything in my day i was sure to meet someone i knew...

Have yo utried to join an Irish group the irish population is big in the US ... And usally do have a lot of expats Irish clubs...

Soon the wait for your EAD will be over and then getting out there is fun.

try to get some projects for the day,

I know that meeting people in the US is a little difficult.

Good luck to oyu hope things will be better sure and i m sure it will.

Sending some good mojo your way

Rejane

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Definetly head to Boston, my cousin has lived here for 10 years(she is from Dublin) and she said she actually wants to move there. The city is filled with Irish-you would love it there. We had a great time-it reminded me so much of Ireland

Once you are able to work I am sure you will be soooo much happier-I am not looking forward to Gavin's first few months here(don't mean that in a bad way) I just think it will be hard with him sitting around-wait a minut he is an actor & pretty much does that now :whistle: I worry about him missing his mates, his family, like you said just going to the pub for a pint. This whole process is so frustrating for everyone.

chin up-you'll be able to work soon (F)


Ni neart go cur le cheile

"Togetherness is Strength"

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If you live in the middle of nowhere, maybe yardwork or gardening? It could be very therapeutic to see the results of your labor, plus all the herbs / veggies you can grow. Just a thought.


09-02-2005 Applications for AOS, EAD, and AP received by MSC

10-21-2005 AOS fingerprint notice for 12-08-2005

11-07-2005 AP approved

12-05-2005 Infopass appt at San Jose office for interim EAD -- Refused, because it is already approved by MSC on 11-07-2005

12-07-2005 Attempt at interim EAD at San Francisco office -- no go. Back to San Jose, where CSO (chief station officer) tells they will contact MSC via email to request permission to issue interim EAD

12-08-2005 Biometrics for AOS and EAD. Having no EAD appt letter was no problem (used EAD NOA)

12-15-2005 EAD arrived in the mail

12-24-2005 Received interview letter; interview scheduled 03-01-2006

01-28-2006 Received replacement SSN card in married name (5 wks since application)

03-01-2006 AOS interview -- approved; received stamp in the passport

03-13-2006 Green card arrived in the mail

---

Filing for removal of conditions

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Galwayman... come to Boston... I am a scottish girl but I fit in so well with the irish people here they are the best... I still have days when the call of home is so strong and I feel sad and lonely... It does get better with time... if you are in boston at anytime and need someone to chat with over a drink give me a shout...

Kezzie

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hi galwayman,

i'm going through the same thing... alone for about 12 hours a day.

i'm really glad to see you are looking for positive alternatives and not moping or sulking. :thumbs:

there is no limit to what you can do to pass the time. studing for the MCSA is great, but make you sure add in some fun things as well:

* learn another language

* take up arts &/or crafts (photography, painting, woodworking, gardening, baking)

* volunteer at a library, church, charitable organization, etc.

* pick up a useful or cool skill (first aid/cpr, massage therapy, bartending)

* pick up a sport (golf, soccer, swimming, tennis) or join a gym

* get a pet

you will get your EAD before you know it! stay positive and i'm sure things will work out just fine. best of luck!


Adjustment of Status

July 1 2006 - Sent EAD & AOS packet

Sept 19 2006 - EAD APPROVED

Sept 22 2006 - AOS APPROVED

Sept 23 2006 - EAD card arrived

Sept 29 2006 - GC arrived!!!

Removal of Conditions

Jul 9 2008 - Filed @ VSC

Feb 25 2009 - Transferred to CSC

June 20 2009 - Card production ordered

NATURALIZATION

Aug 24 2009 - Mailed N-400 priority mail

Aug 26 2009 - rec'd at TX Lockbox

Aug 27 2009 - NOA1 (rec'd 8/31)

Aug 28 2009 - check cashed

Sept 4 2009 - biometrics notice [rec'd Sept 9]

Sept 25 2009 - Biometrics

Oct 17 2009 - Email about file transfer for interview

Oct 21 2009 - Interview Letter Rec'd

Dec 8 2009 - Interview - PASSED!!!!!!

Dec 19 2009 - Oath Letter rec'd

Jan 14 2010 - OATH CEREMONY!!!!

Jan 15 2010 - Passport app.

Jan 21 2010 - Nat. cert. returned

Jan 22 2010 - Passport rec'd

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Hi there,

the first lot of months are indeed the hardest. i went through a period where I was so pissed off i didn't know what to do, but I always knew that I had made the right decision.

its still early days and I guess you need to be as positive as possible as negativity will drag you down. I guess what i am trying to say is that if you are at this stage and have only been here 2 months, its going to be a long road ahead if you have a negative attitude.

My husband is a paramedic. he works very long hours and is up at 5.45 in the morning and away to work and I won't see him again until the next morning around 12.30 or 1am depending on if he gets a late critical call. Yes the days are lonely at times but I realised that if i moped then they would be even worse. i would advise you to study for a course, study for your state driving licence if you don't have it, do voluntary work, get a dog if your in-laws permit.

i live with my in-laws as well and there are times where I wish they wuld drop off the face of the planet, but we are saving by staying here for now s we can get a decent house when we look next winter. Theres always a positive side :yes:

i too live out in the boonies of texas and have roadrunners and coyotes as neighbours :lol: but i also have a dog here that i brought with me from Northern Ireland and I've regained my fitness by running with her. ogs are great company and if your in-laws permit, perhaps you can look into getting one. That is if you are a doggy person.

it gets better and each day is a step closer to that all eleusive interview

Best Regards,

Kat :luv:


I-130 for both parents

March 28th 2013 - Priority date/ NOA 1
November 14th 2013 - Transferred to Nebraska Service Center

January 7th 2014 - Case changed online to approved for both

January 8th 2014 - case changed to shipped to NVC

January 9th 2014 - case changed to NOA 2 mailed

January 10th 2014 - Received the hardcopy of the NOA 2 stating that NVC would issue a case number in 30 days approx.

January 21st 2014 - Case Received at NVC

February 26th 2014 - Case numbers and IIN number received - Wrong embassy code assigned...now waiting for new case numbers.

March 3rd 2014 - Filled in DS-261 for both parents

March 5th 2014- AOS available, paid and submitted AOS packet.

March 6th 2014 - USPS shows packet was delivered at NVC

March 10th 2014 - AOS shows as paid in the CEAC portal/AOS logged into system as being received by NVC.

March 11th 2014 - New case number assigned for my Dad.

March 20th 2014 - Paid IV fee for my Mum.

March 25th 2014 - AOS accepted by NVC with no checklist.

March 26th 2014 - Filled in and submitted DS-260 for my Mum

March 31st 2014 - AOS found in my Mum's file for my Dad - accepted and placed into his file/IV fee available for my Dad and Paid.

April 1st - Mailed all civil documents to NVC for both parents.

April 3rd: IV fee shows as paid in portal/submitted DS-260 for my Dad.

April 22nd: checklist issued for civil documents - NVC error ...

April 23rd: sent another certified copy of my marriage certificate

April 24th: Case complete! :)

April 30th 2014 - Medical scheduled for parents at Knightsbridge in London

June 11th: Interview at London Embassy - Approved :)

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I agree... the first few months are the hardest! And the fact that you are staying at home will not help... I hope you get your EAD soon so you can get in the market and distract yourself a bit more...

Maybe you could find some irish people in your area with whom you could meet up?

Hope it gets better!


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I don't know how far you are from Portsmouth, but there's a great English-style pub called The Coat of Arms. I'd be more than happy to meet you and your wife down there for a drink and a natter. Or if you can make it up to Maine, we have RiRa here in Portland which purports to be an Irish pub, and they have a lot of live music.

The first phase of adjustment sucks, I know that. I think I gave you my phone number - let me know :)

(You'd get on well with my husband; he's studying for the MCSA & MCSE right now too.)

Edited by clmarsh

Make sure you're wearing clean knickers. You never know when you'll be run over by a bus.

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Galwayman we're in Nashua NH- we should meet up! I proposed a New England meetup a little while ago..maybe summer would be a perfect time for it. I plan on leaving my current job by the end of June, so after that hubby and I should have more leisure time.

Hi,

I just want to know how do people cope been on their own while your partner works and your waiting for the EAD to come.

I have been here since march 7th due to pre wedding commitments. We got married april 21st and had such a wonderfull day. My family were here for a week and my parents two weeks.

My wife works long hours in her job. Im basically alone for 8 hours every day. We struggle because i cant work and its frustrating as the money is way better in MA in computer support than what i earned back home in ireland. Im about to send in the greencard forms as we had problems getting tax clearance forms from the accountant. So thats another 3 months before i can legally work.

I miss ireland, i miss my family. I miss living in a city. I miss just meeting up with friends and having a few beers in a good old irish pub. There are lots of things i miss which makes it even harder. I havent met one irish person here since we moved over. We have friends but we only see them at the weekend as their lives are just as busy. To top it all off we are living with my wifes parents until i can work and then buy our own house. We live in the middle of nowhere in NH.

But you know what i love my wife and this struggle is only short term. We made the decision to move from ireland to the US.


THE BALLAD OF CAROLINE & HEIKKI

~MET ON IRC IN 1999 WHEN CAROLINE WAS LIVING IN FINLAND

~MET IN PERSON FIRST TIME EASTER 2000

~GOT ENGAGED DECEMBER 2000

~GOT MARRIED FEB. 2001 ON GROUNDHOG DAY!

~JUNE 2004 DECIDED TO MOVE TO THE USA

~MARCH 2005 BEGAN DOING PAPERWORK

~MAY 12, 2005 I-130 APPROVED; ALSO SUBMITTED BIOGRAPHIC INFO FORMS, PHOTOS, BOTH AFFIDAVITS OF SUPPORT AND I-864 CHECKLIST

~MEDICAL EXAM JULY 28- MISSION ACCOMPLISHED

~INTERVIEW SCHEDULED FOR AUGUST 22ND!!

VISA APPROVED!:)

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Hi,

I just want to know how do people cope been on their own while your partner works and your waiting for the EAD to come.

I have been here since march 7th due to pre wedding commitments. We got married april 21st and had such a wonderfull day. My family were here for a week and my parents two weeks.

My wife works long hours in her job. Im basically alone for 8 hours every day. We struggle because i cant work and its frustrating as the money is way better in MA in computer support than what i earned back home in ireland. Im about to send in the greencard forms as we had problems getting tax clearance forms from the accountant. So thats another 3 months before i can legally work.

I miss ireland, i miss my family. I miss living in a city. I miss just meeting up with friends and having a few beers in a good old irish pub. There are lots of things i miss which makes it even harder. I havent met one irish person here since we moved over. We have friends but we only see them at the weekend as their lives are just as busy. To top it all off we are living with my wifes parents until i can work and then buy our own house. We live in the middle of nowhere in NH.

But you know what i love my wife and this struggle is only short term. We made the decision to move from ireland to the US.

Galwayman,

I hear you! In my experience it will take some time (one year or more) to get adjusted to both a new country and a new relationship. My wife and I are still going through it after over ayear but a lot better than during the iniytial months.

Some tips...

1. Need both tolerance and patience on both sides.

2. It is ok to show anger and frustration from time to time but do try to refrain from undermining SO's confidence and self concept with in-the- moment- of- anger lashing-out and recriminations and put downs.

3. It is also a test of love for both parties.

4. After a fight always, make-up and do not sulk.

5. Communicate openly, your emotional ups and downs.

These are just a few that I can think of.

Hang in there.

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