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how to keep things from getting ugly

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Young King Arthur was ambushed and imprisoned by the monarch of a neighboring kingdom. The monarch could have killed him but was moved by Arthur's youth and ideals. So, the monarch offered him his freedom, as long as he could answer a very difficult question. Arthur would have a year to figure out the answer and, if after a year, he still had no answer, he would be put to death.

The question?....What do women really want? Such a question would perplex even the most knowledgeable man, and to young Arthur, it seemed an impossible query. But, since it was better than death, he accepted the monarch's proposition to have an answer by year's end.

He returned to his kingdom and began to poll everyone: the princess, the priests, the wise men and even the court jester. He spoke with everyone, but no one! could give him a satisfactory answer.

Many people advised him to consult the old witch, for only she would have the answer.

But the price would be high; as the witch was famous throughout the kingdom for the exorbitant prices she charged.

The last day of the year arrived and Arthur had no choice but to talk to the witch. She agreed to answer the question, but he would have to agree to her price first.

The old witch wanted to marry Sir Lancelot, the most noble of the Knights of the Round Table and Arthur's closest friend!

Young Arthur was horrified. She was hunchbacked and hideous, had only one tooth, smelled like sewerage, made obscene noises, etc. He had never encountered such a repugnant creature in all his life.

He refused to force his friend to marry her and endure such a terrible burden, but Lancelot, learning of the proposal, spoke with Arthur.

He said nothing was too big of a sacrifice compared to Arthur's life and the preservation of the Round Table.

Hence, a wedding was proclaimed and the witch answered Arthur's question thus:

What a woman really wants, she answered....is to be in charge of her own life.

Everyone in the kingdom instantly knew that the witch had uttered a great truth and that Arthur's life would be spared.

And so it was, the neighboring monarch granted Arthur his freedom and Lancelot and the witch had a wonderful wedding.

The honeymoon hour approached and Lancelot, steeling himself for a horrific experience, entered the bedroom. But, what a sight awaited him. The most beautiful woman he had ever seen, lay before him on the bed. The astounded Lancelot asked what had happened.

The beauty replied that since he had been so kind to her when she appeared as a witch, she would henceforth, be her horrible deformed self only half the time and the beautiful maiden the other half.

Which would he prefer? Beautiful during the day ....or night?

Lancelot pondered the predicament. During the day, a beautiful woman to show off to his friends, but at night, in the privacy of his castle, an old witch? Or, would he prefer having a hideous witch during the day, but by night, a beautiful woman for him to enjoy wondrous, intimate moments?

Noble Lancelot, knowing the answer the witch gave Arthur to his question, said that he would allow HER to make the choice herself.

Upon hearing this, she announced that she would be beautiful all the time because he had respected her enough to let her be in charge of her own life.

Now....what is the moral to this story?

The moral is.....

If you don't let a woman have her own way.... Things are going to get ugly.


* ~ * Charles * ~ *
 

I carry a gun because a cop is too heavy.

 

USE THE REPORT BUTTON INSTEAD OF MESSAGING A MODERATOR!

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all i did was suggest that you consolidate the jokes. don't be so touchy!


AOS

August 30, 2005 - AOS, , AP applications mailed to Chicago Lockbox

September 9, 2005 - NOA's for AOS, AP, (dated Sept. 1)

November 28, 2005 - AOS biometrics - refused EAD biometrics at the same time

December 5, 2005 - AP approved

December 7, 2005 - Infopass appointment for interim EAD

December 12, 2005 - Received EAD card

December 13, 2005 - Received AP

June 14, 2005 - Case Status Inquiry/Tracer

June 19, 2005 - Letter sent to congressman

AOS INTERVIEW SCHEDULED FOR AUGUST 8, 2006

AOS approved - August 8th, 2006 - hooray - done with USCIS for now!

GREENCARD RECEIVED - August 18, 2006

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If you don't let a woman have her own way.... Things are going to get ugly.

:thumbs::thumbs: I remember first time you told me that joke :P




* K1 Timeline *
* 04/07/06: I-129F Sent to NSC
* 10/02/06: Interview date - APPROVED!
* 10/10/06: POE Houston
* 11/25/06: Wedding day!!!

* AOS/EAD/AP Timeline *
*01/05/07: AOS/EAD/AP sent
*02/19/08: AOS approved
*02/27/08: Permanent Resident Card received

* LOC Timeline *
*12/31/09: Applied Lifting of Condition
*01/04/10: NOA
*02/12/10: Biometrics
*03/03/10: LOC approved
*03/11/10: 10 years green card received

* Naturalization Timeline *
*12/17/10: package sent
*12/29/10: NOA date
*01/19/11: biometrics
*04/12/11: interview
*04/15/11: approval letter
*05/13/11: Oath Ceremony - Officially done with Immigration.

Complete Timeline

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Yeah, and I was the original 'complainer', not canadalaura!

I'll keep my suggestions to myself next time. :blink:

He got quite annoyed by me, because I sent a PM instead of starting a thread. I was accused of being hostile. :unsure:


AOS

August 30, 2005 - AOS, , AP applications mailed to Chicago Lockbox

September 9, 2005 - NOA's for AOS, AP, (dated Sept. 1)

November 28, 2005 - AOS biometrics - refused EAD biometrics at the same time

December 5, 2005 - AP approved

December 7, 2005 - Infopass appointment for interim EAD

December 12, 2005 - Received EAD card

December 13, 2005 - Received AP

June 14, 2005 - Case Status Inquiry/Tracer

June 19, 2005 - Letter sent to congressman

AOS INTERVIEW SCHEDULED FOR AUGUST 8, 2006

AOS approved - August 8th, 2006 - hooray - done with USCIS for now!

GREENCARD RECEIVED - August 18, 2006

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Yeah, and I was the original 'complainer', not canadalaura!

I'll keep my suggestions to myself next time. :blink:

He got quite annoyed by me, because I sent a PM instead of starting a thread. I was accused of being hostile. :unsure:

Don't worry. :thumbs: He probably went smoke a cig now, plus i'm online he'll be less bored now lol




* K1 Timeline *
* 04/07/06: I-129F Sent to NSC
* 10/02/06: Interview date - APPROVED!
* 10/10/06: POE Houston
* 11/25/06: Wedding day!!!

* AOS/EAD/AP Timeline *
*01/05/07: AOS/EAD/AP sent
*02/19/08: AOS approved
*02/27/08: Permanent Resident Card received

* LOC Timeline *
*12/31/09: Applied Lifting of Condition
*01/04/10: NOA
*02/12/10: Biometrics
*03/03/10: LOC approved
*03/11/10: 10 years green card received

* Naturalization Timeline *
*12/17/10: package sent
*12/29/10: NOA date
*01/19/11: biometrics
*04/12/11: interview
*04/15/11: approval letter
*05/13/11: Oath Ceremony - Officially done with Immigration.

Complete Timeline

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Yeah, and I was the original 'complainer', not canadalaura!

I'll keep my suggestions to myself next time. :blink:

He got quite annoyed by me, because I sent a PM instead of starting a thread. I was accused of being hostile. :unsure:

that's kinda crappy

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Yeah, and I was the original 'complainer', not canadalaura!

I'll keep my suggestions to myself next time. :blink:

He got quite annoyed by me, because I sent a PM instead of starting a thread. I was accused of being hostile. :unsure:

that's kinda crappy

that I sent a PM? :unsure:


AOS

August 30, 2005 - AOS, , AP applications mailed to Chicago Lockbox

September 9, 2005 - NOA's for AOS, AP, (dated Sept. 1)

November 28, 2005 - AOS biometrics - refused EAD biometrics at the same time

December 5, 2005 - AP approved

December 7, 2005 - Infopass appointment for interim EAD

December 12, 2005 - Received EAD card

December 13, 2005 - Received AP

June 14, 2005 - Case Status Inquiry/Tracer

June 19, 2005 - Letter sent to congressman

AOS INTERVIEW SCHEDULED FOR AUGUST 8, 2006

AOS approved - August 8th, 2006 - hooray - done with USCIS for now!

GREENCARD RECEIVED - August 18, 2006

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wow...another day on vj...


Peace to All creatures great and small............................................

But when we turn to the Hebrew literature, we do not find such jokes about the donkey. Rather the animal is known for its strength and its loyalty to its master (Genesis 49:14; Numbers 22:30).

Peppi_drinking_beer.jpg

my burro, bosco ..enjoying a beer in almaty

http://www.visajourney.com/forums/index.ph...st&id=10835

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Yeah, and I was the original 'complainer', not canadalaura!

I'll keep my suggestions to myself next time. :blink:

He got quite annoyed by me, because I sent a PM instead of starting a thread. I was accused of being hostile. :unsure:

that's kinda crappy

that I sent a PM? :unsure:

haha no that you were called hostile :P

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i find it more ironic that certain members on vj can post all day long various threads yet when i do i get pm's demanding i stop. i guess it has to do with who knows who around here.


* ~ * Charles * ~ *
 

I carry a gun because a cop is too heavy.

 

USE THE REPORT BUTTON INSTEAD OF MESSAGING A MODERATOR!

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