ME/NA ~ Changing of Lifestyles

[sara535 15]

I have worked and I have been a stay at home mom. Do you really want to know which one is more stressful???

no kidding!

[MrsAmera 41]

Couple comments here;

Teeth and disease: My grandfather was recently hospitalized, they didnt know what was wrong with him but with some tests the found a bacteria in his heart valve. The infectious disease doctor immediately operated to remove the infection. He literally would have died the next day had they not operated and removed this. When the tests came back the doctor told him the cause of the infections was his poor teeth and gums. So having bad teeth definetely can have an effect.

Insurance: My husband had that same stupid fight until after 6 months of "headaches" (loooong story) I took him to the ER (we didn't have insurance at the time). They did a catscan and other tests, to find nothing but it cost us over $2000. With two children as well we can't risk it and the cost of check ups and vaccines is crazy. He doesn't complain anymore.

Diet: When hubby came we were on a 100% Moroccan food diet because he wouldn't eat anything else. Then he got comfortable and started eating American. We're now reverting back to Moroccan ways as the American food has had a horrible effect. I <3 our farmer's market!!!

[Beauty for Ashes 257]

Like most of everyone here I'll soon be reunited with my babe in a couple of weeks!! Can't wait

So here's something I was thinking about, I read around a bit and ME/NA death rates seriously start at around 40 years old (My grandparents also died 40's-60's) .I'm guessing because of medical care they don't go to doctors usually for "checkups" only when sick. The diets could be a problem also. So much meat!! Everyday beef/goat and also eating French bread (or other kinds) everyday with 2 meals!!

My spouse seems to only eat really small meals 2 times a day sometimes only eating 1 meal. Has anyone changed their spouses diet trying to prolong good health? What have you done or substituted without hurting his taste?

Well my take on things over there... having actually gone through their hospital system when my daughter had an accident.........

My daughter{pre schooler} ran into a corner of a wall in Oran and had a huge gash in her head. You think they have invisible stitches over there or sutures? Oh hell no. They stitched her up with something resembling crochet yarn with no shot for pain and she has a frankenstein scar on her head that cannot be helped without plastic surgery. The health care is atrocious. People die at 30 years old from things that are very simple. I contracted a lung burn over there from diesel exposure and for sure if I was there I would have died January 15th. It took an American team of drs 6 ours to get my lungs working properly after a horrible chemical exposure in North Africa. There are babies born over there with spinal bifida just laying around with open sores on their back and alot of peoples idea of dental care is extraction. Even if you do not have health insurance, you can go to the health department and with a good diet and moderation you have a hell of a lot better chance of being ok in the USA. I do not know peoples pollyanna idea of health care in MENA but after having watched my preschooler toddling around with a wound ( would have been invisible here) that stuck out puss filled and face swelling,.... watching the even EXCLUSIVE clinic not have any thing for pain.. YES THIS WAS AT AN EXCLUSIVE CLINIC....there is NO WAY IN HELL I would want my kids growing up there. People die from car accidents every day over there that they would survive over here and for all of our fat eating,.. heart issues and everything else.. your health is a hell of alot better over here if you can control your mouth at the buffet...

I would not be alive had I stayed in North Africa in January. The pollution is atrocious. The health care even worse... I will not take my newborn baby back over there until he is at least 2 or 3 for fear of infection and lack of reasonable care and certainly not until I have at least 60 percent breathing capacity back... ( I was at 100 percent in December before I went...) For people to insinuate that people are more healthy there is just bullocks. Rich people maybe... poor people die of simple cancers that are very treatable here and the teeth situation.. thats a whole nother ball of wax

[Beauty for Ashes 257]

I have worked and I have been a stay at home mom. Do you really want to know which one is more stressful???

no kidding!

Well... I think staying home is much more difficult. When you work you get outside stimulation .. when you are at home... you actually have MORE PRESSURE to keep the house clean LOL

[sarahaziz 0]

I agree with you wahrania that's the worry that made me post this topic. In cities or high pollution areas I believe they're strictly connected with breathing > oxygen to the brain which also affects the heart.

The diets , some men eating only 1 or 2 times a day and not even a sufficient portioned meal big loaf of bread, meat everyday and sometimes vegetables being served. Extremely bad for cholesterol levels. Coffee like freaking 7 times a day with alot of sugar and that coffee is STRONG.

I think walking is what helps reverse the diet's affect a bit I don't really know!

I guess more with the people living in poverty or middle class where a father or a son has to work to support the whole family. A whole family is considerably more than a family in US if you have like 5 sisters 2-3 brothers. I think if a man is working extremely hard to keep food, water and other expenses going in the house what's wrong with him going to a late night cafe. They don't have much to look forward to like men here do (i'm talking about good men with morals no disco,partying,etc..)

That's my thoughts!!

[Nasturtium 500]

Stress for the men? I see them every night sitting at the coffee shops while the women are working their A$$e$ of preparing the dinner and watching the children. I have worked and I have been a stay at home mom. Do you really want to know which one is more stressful???

Even if it was easier on the woman, she would still feel latent stress from her husband. When a family is impoverished, it is not just the man who feels the stress. The woman (assuming she is staying home and cooking, caring for children, etc) has the stress of trying to figure out how to cut corners and cost at home and also make do with food, etc.

[chaishai 1]

Stress for the men? I see them every night sitting at the coffee shops while the women are working their A$$e$ of preparing the dinner and watching the children. I have worked and I have been a stay at home mom. Do you really want to know which one is more stressful???

Even if it was easier on the woman, she would still feel latent stress from her husband. When a family is impoverished, it is not just the man who feels the stress. The woman (assuming she is staying home and cooking, caring for children, etc) has the stress of trying to figure out how to cut corners and cost at home and also make do with food, etc.

I agree. there are all different kinds of stress. you cant make a blanket statement that being a stay at home mom is harder or going to work is harder. I will tell you that I work during the week and I am dealing with risk and layoffs and ridiculous management and harassment even and I am VERY stressed out. then I come home and deal with my kids and I get even more stressed out. plus sports and kids events, whining, bad behavior on weekends - stressful. my husband works and has his own stresses that are unique to mine and then he comes home and helps with the kids too. i think its all how you deal with your situation and your perspective on life. lately, i have been trying not to let anything stress me too much.

[Nasturtium 500]

I agree. there are all different kinds of stress. you cant make a blanket statement that being a stay at home mom is harder or going to work is harder. I will tell you that I work during the week and I am dealing with risk and layoffs and ridiculous management and harassment even and I am VERY stressed out. then I come home and deal with my kids and I get even more stressed out. plus sports and kids events, whining, bad behavior on weekends - stressful. my husband works and has his own stresses that are unique to mine and then he comes home and helps with the kids too. i think its all how you deal with your situation and your perspective on life. lately, i have been trying not to let anything stress me too much.

OMG, I just have to say I totally hear you. My crazy cranked-out coworker (yes, she is on meth, pot, and comes to work either stoned or drunk) is telling people I will go into a "Jew-fit" if I have to work fridays (which is not true, as I worked Fridays up until the manager decided he wanted to work my Friday time instead of me and took it from me and is also funny because the day she is really complaining about is Saturday, but she can't even remember she works every Saturday and is also off Fridays), and my manager is STILL talking about me to all the coworkers and has informed one of them he is going to talk to me tomorrow before I go on vacation. He thinks I am jealous of his job and working against him. I could care less about his crappy job! I just wish he'd stop watching porn, which he is STILL doing, (although hilarious side story being he made us all sign paperwork saying we would not watch porn at work today) and still telling us sex stories and alternately screaming at us constantly. So this is my chance, I guess, to get fired or go out on a limb and talk to him in front of the district manager.

[tammy2688 1]

Actually its great to try to change diets and try to "prolong life" and true, God does help those who help themselves but in all honesty our life span, the moment it is our time is to go has been determined already and as believer of God, I know you believe that. You can't extend your life nor make it shorter...the reason i say this is because I am awfully worried about my husband smoking and its ironic the guys who don't smoke get lung cancer and those who do life a long fruitful life of about 84-85. I plead him not to smoke, that it would increase his years cause I need him around durrr...but its all in God's time and no matter what you do it can all fall in your face.

I do wish a fruitful life for our husbands and will do the things that would help them though it is absolutely not in our hands.

Edited May 8, 2008 by tammy2688

[Nagishkaw 510]

Like most of everyone here I'll soon be reunited with my babe in a couple of weeks!! Can't wait

So here's something I was thinking about, I read around a bit and ME/NA death rates seriously start at around 40 years old (My grandparents also died 40's-60's) .I'm guessing because of medical care they don't go to doctors usually for "checkups" only when sick. The diets could be a problem also. So much meat!! Everyday beef/goat and also eating French bread (or other kinds) everyday with 2 meals!!

My spouse seems to only eat really small meals 2 times a day sometimes only eating 1 meal. Has anyone changed their spouses diet trying to prolong good health? What have you done or substituted without hurting his taste?

Well my take on things over there... having actually gone through their hospital system when my daughter had an accident.........

My daughter{pre schooler} ran into a corner of a wall in Oran and had a huge gash in her head. You think they have invisible stitches over there or sutures? Oh hell no. They stitched her up with something resembling crochet yarn with no shot for pain and she has a frankenstein scar on her head that cannot be helped without plastic surgery. The health care is atrocious. People die at 30 years old from things that are very simple. I contracted a lung burn over there from diesel exposure and for sure if I was there I would have died January 15th. It took an American team of drs 6 ours to get my lungs working properly after a horrible chemical exposure in North Africa. There are babies born over there with spinal bifida just laying around with open sores on their back and alot of peoples idea of dental care is extraction. Even if you do not have health insurance, you can go to the health department and with a good diet and moderation you have a hell of a lot better chance of being ok in the USA. I do not know peoples pollyanna idea of health care in MENA but after having watched my preschooler toddling around with a wound ( would have been invisible here) that stuck out puss filled and face swelling,.... watching the even EXCLUSIVE clinic not have any thing for pain.. YES THIS WAS AT AN EXCLUSIVE CLINIC....there is NO WAY IN HELL I would want my kids growing up there. People die from car accidents every day over there that they would survive over here and for all of our fat eating,.. heart issues and everything else.. your health is a hell of alot better over here if you can control your mouth at the buffet...

I would not be alive had I stayed in North Africa in January. The pollution is atrocious. The health care even worse... I will not take my newborn baby back over there until he is at least 2 or 3 for fear of infection and lack of reasonable care and certainly not until I have at least 60 percent breathing capacity back... ( I was at 100 percent in December before I went...) For people to insinuate that people are more healthy there is just bullocks. Rich people maybe... poor people die of simple cancers that are very treatable here and the teeth situation.. thats a whole nother ball of wax

My SO has a huge Frankenstein scar from his heart surgeries. I asked him, ' Who sutured you? Stevie Wonder? ' . Gad! It looks absolutely horrid.

Edited May 8, 2008 by Nagishkaw

[doodlebugg 10]

I don't know about your state but in Massachusetts it's illegal NOT to be insured so I was able to tell him that and that was the end of that.

Sarah you just brought up another topic that was a little bit of a misunderstanding and argument for me and DH. I said that as well.. That I want to add him to my health insurance as soon as he gets here and called the insurance company and asked what they wanted to see: marriage certificate and translation or US Spousal visa, etc - Meaning what did they want as proof we were married so I could put him on my policy and DH was like what are you going to do that for? So I explained the insurance to him and he was like ah okay it's through work that's fine - and I thought it was settled.. And then he goes - Does that cost you anything? And I explained the monthly pre tax deductions and premiums to him and he went nuts ... "You are going to pay money every week from your salary for "incase" I get sick?? What if I never get sick? What about all that money they took and I never even needed to use it or had a problem?!"

What a mess that was - He finally came around after I explained to him that if he broke something for instance and had to go get a cast, or any number of things, car accident, etc that the medical bills could be in the thousands of dollars and there is no way we could guarantee that we could pay that up front or have it to pay later, etc.

For now I'm hoping we settled it but I have a feeling it's another argument coming when he gets here and I go to send off the paperwork lol

MENA men seem to have REALLY hard heads

Gonna add him to my health insurance soon as possible

[brnidokiegurl 0]

MENA men seem to have REALLY hard heads

best true statement lately but the thing i did notice in ahmeds family was the diabetes, his mom and dad both have and others also in the family BUT you watch all the sugar in the coffee and teas then every meal the pepsi, they love their chocolates, and the men smoke like trains. This year his mom got very very sick and i actually think they thought they were going to loose her and he called it influnzia (may not have spelled right) but they would carry her to the dr, then home, maybe to the hospital, then home...not like we would go to the hospital and stay at least over night to get treated. They brought her home and every one just set around and watched and waited, i never felt so helpless to try and tell them what should be done but this wasnt their way...

[polarbear 0]

I did notice a change in my husband when he moved back to Egypt.

He had been living in France for 8 years (moved there when 21) with very good health care, ect... He went back to Egypt when his father fell ill and took over running the family farm. When I went to visit him after only 1 year of this, my first though was "wow, he looks like he's aged 10 yrs" - of course that was only for a split second and then he was just my habbibi again but he now is going gray at 32 and there was a noticible increase in hair loss. He just looked malnutritioned and worn down even though he was smiling his head off. He looked even worse when he got off the plane at JFK... I really think it was all the stress

He's looking better again with the easier life style he has here (even though his work is manual labor) and easy access to whatever he wants to eat. He does say he has lost weight and his ring doesn't fit anymore, but I think that's just bc I make him cook with less fat and his mother isn't at home to cook whenever he feels hungry

[SaadBell 0]

julianna - I hear you about your job, I am in a law suit with my old employer. I don’t care if I win or lose, just sticking to them is enough happiness for me. You deserve a metal for all the hell you have been through; when you are ready for evil ideas, just send me a line. I have lots of evil things that can be done, that are not illegal but just plain nasty.

[sereia 0]

dental health is definitely related to the heart. everytime i see a dentist i am required to take some antibiotics because i had a heart murmur when i was a baby and they don't want to take any chances with me getting an infection from dental work!