And...

[TracyTN 237]

It's know if my husband and I were in some rocky waters, my first thought would not be to notify the government.

Exactly.

At the same time, I wouldn't announce my marriage over simply because someone forgot to tape something for me.

[pushbrk 13,998]

It's know if my husband and I were in some rocky waters, my first thought would not be to notify the government.

Exactly.

At the same time, I wouldn't announce my marriage over simply because someone forgot to tape something for me.

LOL, even the OP didn't say that. It sounds like either the movie erasing was the last event marking the time of the announcement. Perhaps it was also the last straw to prompt a tantrum, but nobody suggested the departure was "because" of. Google "coincidental correlation" or "post hoc, ergo propter hoc".

In any event, USCIS is not the answer.

[Minya's wife 25]

Just wondering how long I should wait, if at all...

We were married earlier this year, after successful K-1 application. Following that, we filed and were granted the 2 year conditional green card.

So your marriage is less than a year old, right? Arguments happen, some more rational than others, but you're living a new marriage, and merging lives has some difficulties even under the best of circumstances....

Tonight, after discovering that my 6 year old daughter had cancelled the DVR recording of a lifetime movie, she decided that it was OVER...

Assuming that is so. And when she started to pack her bags tonight, I suggested that she should leave now not later, she called some work friends who came and picked her up. Off she went, with my heart, most of her stuff, and two of my children who will wake up in the morning wondering where she has gone.

So what you're saying is you kicked her out...and now you're crying because she took you "heart" with her, and you don't know how to tell your kids?

Do I immediately send notice to USCIS? Wait to see if she cools off? Not at all sure what the heck I am supposed to do right now... Sleep would be good but not going to happen...

Your "heart" walked out the door a few hours ago, but you're already wondering if you should notify USCIS? For what? If the marriage is irreparably broken, then you should be concentrating on a divorce attorney, not how quickly can you get the 'authorities' incolved in the hopes that what? they'll deport her?

If this was a fight between a USC married couple, the spouse left behind would be trying to figure out how to fix the fight (if as stated this is all about a cancelled DVR recording) rather than asking for advice on how to 'cokcblock' their spouse's immigration. Ugh!

Edited December 19, 2007 by Paula&Minya

[mr_bitten 0]

Just wanted to thank all of you for the comments advising calm. Fortunately the day after I posted we had a very long talk, and worked out a ton of issues.

A late night phone call from her cousin, explaining that certain often repeated comments regarding wanting to go home, not wanting to be married, etc. were apparently common expressions used during arguments (large and small) from where both my wife and her cousin are from. Her cousin explained that during her first year (of a 10 year marriage to her German husband) she probably said such things at least a hundred times. The comments are blanket statements that "something" large or small is bothering them and not literal statements of desire to end the respective marriages. Her cousin has been married ten years now!

Anyway, we discussed that such statements may be common in the PI, at least where these two are from, but here they are heard quite literally. And it is nearly impossible to trust the strength of a marriage when they are repeated, which they have been for a few months.

As to those who commented that I wanted to turn to ICE at the first sign of a problem, no, not at all what I meant when posting. Nor is it exactly accurate to say I kicked her out, she was packing her things, and when I said if you are going to keep saying you want to go, you should go sooner not later, she called some friends, and wound up with a place to go that night. But I would also say, I want her to be happy, and if she isn't, then yes I would not want her to leave but would feel obligated to allow her too. I love her enough to sacrifice my heart for her, if that was what she chose.

All of this also showed her she is not as alone as she sometimes feels. She has some new, good friends! She also realized, that although her job is not exactly high paying, she has a great deal more financial resources now than after years of where she was working before. So out of a horrible night came some pretty good realizations for her. That, and of course she did not mean her words, she was pretty devastated, as was I, at the thought of our marriage ending.

In doing the K-1 I have committed myself to legal obligations for the care and financial maintenance of my wife, for 10 years, and was asking a serious question as to what my legal obligations are to USCIS in the event my wife does decide to leave prior to having her own right to be hear via 10 year green card or US citizenship. Obviously the hope for us both is that the marriage is forever, and I don't take it lightly, and some of the responses seem to suggest the inference that I do.

Having so recently gotten out of the clutches of USCIS I had no desire to get either of us back in to their sites! But I think I was, despite being quite despondent at the time, asking a serious question. What does USCIS expect me to do, any of us to do, if our K-1 spouses should abandon our marriages?

Anyway, thanks for all of the responses, even those that seem to be more about admonishing without all the facts!

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to everyone!

[athena_ny 1]

Just wanted to thank all of you for the comments advising calm. Fortunately the day after I posted we had a very long talk, and worked out a ton of issues.

A late night phone call from her cousin, explaining that certain often repeated comments regarding wanting to go home, not wanting to be married, etc. were apparently common expressions used during arguments (large and small) from where both my wife and her cousin are from. Her cousin explained that during her first year (of a 10 year marriage to her German husband) she probably said such things at least a hundred times. The comments are blanket statements that "something" large or small is bothering them and not literal statements of desire to end the respective marriages. Her cousin has been married ten years now!

Anyway, we discussed that such statements may be common in the PI, at least where these two are from, but here they are heard quite literally. And it is nearly impossible to trust the strength of a marriage when they are repeated, which they have been for a few months.

As to those who commented that I wanted to turn to ICE at the first sign of a problem, no, not at all what I meant when posting. Nor is it exactly accurate to say I kicked her out, she was packing her things, and when I said if you are going to keep saying you want to go, you should go sooner not later, she called some friends, and wound up with a place to go that night. But I would also say, I want her to be happy, and if she isn't, then yes I would not want her to leave but would feel obligated to allow her too. I love her enough to sacrifice my heart for her, if that was what she chose.

All of this also showed her she is not as alone as she sometimes feels. She has some new, good friends! She also realized, that although her job is not exactly high paying, she has a great deal more financial resources now than after years of where she was working before. So out of a horrible night came some pretty good realizations for her. That, and of course she did not mean her words, she was pretty devastated, as was I, at the thought of our marriage ending.

In doing the K-1 I have committed myself to legal obligations for the care and financial maintenance of my wife, for 10 years, and was asking a serious question as to what my legal obligations are to USCIS in the event my wife does decide to leave prior to having her own right to be hear via 10 year green card or US citizenship. Obviously the hope for us both is that the marriage is forever, and I don't take it lightly, and some of the responses seem to suggest the inference that I do.

Having so recently gotten out of the clutches of USCIS I had no desire to get either of us back in to their sites! But I think I was, despite being quite despondent at the time, asking a serious question. What does USCIS expect me to do, any of us to do, if our K-1 spouses should abandon our marriages?

Anyway, thanks for all of the responses, even those that seem to be more about admonishing without all the facts!

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to everyone!

Were she to leave, and remain in the US, you would still be locked into the affidavit of support.

[idocare 3]

you may want to look into your obligation towards her now so that you'll know. I wish you well in your marriage but sa nobody has mentioned there r times that you spend all that money getting you SO here into this country, marry them and then they decide that they don't want to be married any morem si they will begin the behavior of having a short fuse , showing bizarre behavior and packing up and leaving a couple of times before leaving for good.

Not saying that your wife is doing that but at least you both learned some valuable information, she learned that she has a friend that will take her in at a moments notice and you learned that she can leave you just that fast and may not want to work it out next time.

Best wishes

[zqt3344 21]

Are you 110% sure?

Just wanted to thank all of you for the comments advising calm. Fortunately the day after I posted we had a very long talk, and worked out a ton of issues.

A late night phone call from her cousin, explaining that certain often repeated comments regarding wanting to go home, not wanting to be married, etc. were apparently common expressions used during arguments (large and small) from where both my wife and her cousin are from. Her cousin explained that during her first year (of a 10 year marriage to her German husband) she probably said such things at least a hundred times. The comments are blanket statements that "something" large or small is bothering them and not literal statements of desire to end the respective marriages. Her cousin has been married ten years now!

Anyway, we discussed that such statements may be common in the PI, at least where these two are from, but here they are heard quite literally. And it is nearly impossible to trust the strength of a marriage when they are repeated, which they have been for a few months.

As to those who commented that I wanted to turn to ICE at the first sign of a problem, no, not at all what I meant when posting. Nor is it exactly accurate to say I kicked her out, she was packing her things, and when I said if you are going to keep saying you want to go, you should go sooner not later, she called some friends, and wound up with a place to go that night. But I would also say, I want her to be happy, and if she isn't, then yes I would not want her to leave but would feel obligated to allow her too. I love her enough to sacrifice my heart for her, if that was what she chose.

All of this also showed her she is not as alone as she sometimes feels. She has some new, good friends! She also realized, that although her job is not exactly high paying, she has a great deal more financial resources now than after years of where she was working before. So out of a horrible night came some pretty good realizations for her. That, and of course she did not mean her words, she was pretty devastated, as was I, at the thought of our marriage ending.

In doing the K-1 I have committed myself to legal obligations for the care and financial maintenance of my wife, for 10 years, and was asking a serious question as to what my legal obligations are to USCIS in the event my wife does decide to leave prior to having her own right to be hear via 10 year green card or US citizenship. Obviously the hope for us both is that the marriage is forever, and I don't take it lightly, and some of the responses seem to suggest the inference that I do.

Having so recently gotten out of the clutches of USCIS I had no desire to get either of us back in to their sites! But I think I was, despite being quite despondent at the time, asking a serious question. What does USCIS expect me to do, any of us to do, if our K-1 spouses should abandon our marriages?

Anyway, thanks for all of the responses, even those that seem to be more about admonishing without all the facts!

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to everyone!

Were she to leave, and remain in the US, you would still be locked into the affidavit of support.

[Jengles 0]

I belive the support is if she goes on government assistance during the next 10 years, then they will come knocking on your door for their money back. It doesn't literally mean if she leaves and can't make ends meet then she can call you.

[athena_ny 1]

Are you 110% sure?

Just wanted to thank all of you for the comments advising calm. Fortunately the day after I posted we had a very long talk, and worked out a ton of issues.

A late night phone call from her cousin, explaining that certain often repeated comments regarding wanting to go home, not wanting to be married, etc. were apparently common expressions used during arguments (large and small) from where both my wife and her cousin are from. Her cousin explained that during her first year (of a 10 year marriage to her German husband) she probably said such things at least a hundred times. The comments are blanket statements that "something" large or small is bothering them and not literal statements of desire to end the respective marriages. Her cousin has been married ten years now!

Anyway, we discussed that such statements may be common in the PI, at least where these two are from, but here they are heard quite literally. And it is nearly impossible to trust the strength of a marriage when they are repeated, which they have been for a few months.

As to those who commented that I wanted to turn to ICE at the first sign of a problem, no, not at all what I meant when posting. Nor is it exactly accurate to say I kicked her out, she was packing her things, and when I said if you are going to keep saying you want to go, you should go sooner not later, she called some friends, and wound up with a place to go that night. But I would also say, I want her to be happy, and if she isn't, then yes I would not want her to leave but would feel obligated to allow her too. I love her enough to sacrifice my heart for her, if that was what she chose.

All of this also showed her she is not as alone as she sometimes feels. She has some new, good friends! She also realized, that although her job is not exactly high paying, she has a great deal more financial resources now than after years of where she was working before. So out of a horrible night came some pretty good realizations for her. That, and of course she did not mean her words, she was pretty devastated, as was I, at the thought of our marriage ending.

In doing the K-1 I have committed myself to legal obligations for the care and financial maintenance of my wife, for 10 years, and was asking a serious question as to what my legal obligations are to USCIS in the event my wife does decide to leave prior to having her own right to be hear via 10 year green card or US citizenship. Obviously the hope for us both is that the marriage is forever, and I don't take it lightly, and some of the responses seem to suggest the inference that I do.

Having so recently gotten out of the clutches of USCIS I had no desire to get either of us back in to their sites! But I think I was, despite being quite despondent at the time, asking a serious question. What does USCIS expect me to do, any of us to do, if our K-1 spouses should abandon our marriages?

Anyway, thanks for all of the responses, even those that seem to be more about admonishing without all the facts!

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to everyone!

Were she to leave, and remain in the US, you would still be locked into the affidavit of support.

Yes I am. We know you love to spread misinformation, but were she to go on means tested benefits, they could come over the petitioner who signed an affadavit of support, even if the marriage didn't work out.

And I know this has been discussed before, but there's at least one divorce case where the I-864 was introduced as evidence that the spouse needed to support the immigrant even though the marriage had dissolved. Perhaps not the way it was meant to be interpreted, but that judge did interpret it that way.

[doodlebugg 10]

which lifetime movie did the 6 yr old erase?

[pushbrk 13,998]

Are you 110% sure?

Just wanted to thank all of you for the comments advising calm. Fortunately the day after I posted we had a very long talk, and worked out a ton of issues.

A late night phone call from her cousin, explaining that certain often repeated comments regarding wanting to go home, not wanting to be married, etc. were apparently common expressions used during arguments (large and small) from where both my wife and her cousin are from. Her cousin explained that during her first year (of a 10 year marriage to her German husband) she probably said such things at least a hundred times. The comments are blanket statements that "something" large or small is bothering them and not literal statements of desire to end the respective marriages. Her cousin has been married ten years now!

Anyway, we discussed that such statements may be common in the PI, at least where these two are from, but here they are heard quite literally. And it is nearly impossible to trust the strength of a marriage when they are repeated, which they have been for a few months.

As to those who commented that I wanted to turn to ICE at the first sign of a problem, no, not at all what I meant when posting. Nor is it exactly accurate to say I kicked her out, she was packing her things, and when I said if you are going to keep saying you want to go, you should go sooner not later, she called some friends, and wound up with a place to go that night. But I would also say, I want her to be happy, and if she isn't, then yes I would not want her to leave but would feel obligated to allow her too. I love her enough to sacrifice my heart for her, if that was what she chose.

All of this also showed her she is not as alone as she sometimes feels. She has some new, good friends! She also realized, that although her job is not exactly high paying, she has a great deal more financial resources now than after years of where she was working before. So out of a horrible night came some pretty good realizations for her. That, and of course she did not mean her words, she was pretty devastated, as was I, at the thought of our marriage ending.

In doing the K-1 I have committed myself to legal obligations for the care and financial maintenance of my wife, for 10 years, and was asking a serious question as to what my legal obligations are to USCIS in the event my wife does decide to leave prior to having her own right to be hear via 10 year green card or US citizenship. Obviously the hope for us both is that the marriage is forever, and I don't take it lightly, and some of the responses seem to suggest the inference that I do.

Having so recently gotten out of the clutches of USCIS I had no desire to get either of us back in to their sites! But I think I was, despite being quite despondent at the time, asking a serious question. What does USCIS expect me to do, any of us to do, if our K-1 spouses should abandon our marriages?

Anyway, thanks for all of the responses, even those that seem to be more about admonishing without all the facts!

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to everyone!

Were she to leave, and remain in the US, you would still be locked into the affidavit of support.

Yes I am. We know you love to spread misinformation, but were she to go on means tested benefits, they could come over the petitioner who signed an affadavit of support, even if the marriage didn't work out.

And I know this has been discussed before, but there's at least one divorce case where the I-864 was introduced as evidence that the spouse needed to support the immigrant even though the marriage had dissolved. Perhaps not the way it was meant to be interpreted, but that judge did interpret it that way.

You betcha!

[zqt3344 21]

Umm, I see how this works with you MM, anytime someone questions you or your statements it is "Misinformation or wrong". You remind me of the little spoiled kid at the playground that does not get her way and then cries out "Since I am losing I am taking my toys and going home you cheat and are not fair!" Nice try, but you need to show me and prove your statement is not disinformation for WE ALL KNOW you ramble on about topics which you are spreading disinformation and inaccuracies that are not correct about either. I am waiting for you to prove your statement on the affidavit of support all I see is your sanctimonious feelings being expressed here, prove it for a change please. AND if you cannot then stop making inaccurate disinformation statements about it.

Are you 110% sure?

Just wanted to thank all of you for the comments advising calm. Fortunately the day after I posted we had a very long talk, and worked out a ton of issues.

A late night phone call from her cousin, explaining that certain often repeated comments regarding wanting to go home, not wanting to be married, etc. were apparently common expressions used during arguments (large and small) from where both my wife and her cousin are from. Her cousin explained that during her first year (of a 10 year marriage to her German husband) she probably said such things at least a hundred times. The comments are blanket statements that "something" large or small is bothering them and not literal statements of desire to end the respective marriages. Her cousin has been married ten years now!

Anyway, we discussed that such statements may be common in the PI, at least where these two are from, but here they are heard quite literally. And it is nearly impossible to trust the strength of a marriage when they are repeated, which they have been for a few months.

As to those who commented that I wanted to turn to ICE at the first sign of a problem, no, not at all what I meant when posting. Nor is it exactly accurate to say I kicked her out, she was packing her things, and when I said if you are going to keep saying you want to go, you should go sooner not later, she called some friends, and wound up with a place to go that night. But I would also say, I want her to be happy, and if she isn't, then yes I would not want her to leave but would feel obligated to allow her too. I love her enough to sacrifice my heart for her, if that was what she chose.

All of this also showed her she is not as alone as she sometimes feels. She has some new, good friends! She also realized, that although her job is not exactly high paying, she has a great deal more financial resources now than after years of where she was working before. So out of a horrible night came some pretty good realizations for her. That, and of course she did not mean her words, she was pretty devastated, as was I, at the thought of our marriage ending.

In doing the K-1 I have committed myself to legal obligations for the care and financial maintenance of my wife, for 10 years, and was asking a serious question as to what my legal obligations are to USCIS in the event my wife does decide to leave prior to having her own right to be hear via 10 year green card or US citizenship. Obviously the hope for us both is that the marriage is forever, and I don't take it lightly, and some of the responses seem to suggest the inference that I do.

Having so recently gotten out of the clutches of USCIS I had no desire to get either of us back in to their sites! But I think I was, despite being quite despondent at the time, asking a serious question. What does USCIS expect me to do, any of us to do, if our K-1 spouses should abandon our marriages?

Anyway, thanks for all of the responses, even those that seem to be more about admonishing without all the facts!

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to everyone!

Were she to leave, and remain in the US, you would still be locked into the affidavit of support.

Yes I am. We know you love to spread misinformation, but were she to go on means tested benefits, they could come over the petitioner who signed an affadavit of support, even if the marriage didn't work out.

And I know this has been discussed before, but there's at least one divorce case where the I-864 was introduced as evidence that the spouse needed to support the immigrant even though the marriage had dissolved. Perhaps not the way it was meant to be interpreted, but that judge did interpret it that way.

Are you 110% sure?

Just wanted to thank all of you for the comments advising calm. Fortunately the day after I posted we had a very long talk, and worked out a ton of issues.

A late night phone call from her cousin, explaining that certain often repeated comments regarding wanting to go home, not wanting to be married, etc. were apparently common expressions used during arguments (large and small) from where both my wife and her cousin are from. Her cousin explained that during her first year (of a 10 year marriage to her German husband) she probably said such things at least a hundred times. The comments are blanket statements that "something" large or small is bothering them and not literal statements of desire to end the respective marriages. Her cousin has been married ten years now!

Anyway, we discussed that such statements may be common in the PI, at least where these two are from, but here they are heard quite literally. And it is nearly impossible to trust the strength of a marriage when they are repeated, which they have been for a few months.

As to those who commented that I wanted to turn to ICE at the first sign of a problem, no, not at all what I meant when posting. Nor is it exactly accurate to say I kicked her out, she was packing her things, and when I said if you are going to keep saying you want to go, you should go sooner not later, she called some friends, and wound up with a place to go that night. But I would also say, I want her to be happy, and if she isn't, then yes I would not want her to leave but would feel obligated to allow her too. I love her enough to sacrifice my heart for her, if that was what she chose.

All of this also showed her she is not as alone as she sometimes feels. She has some new, good friends! She also realized, that although her job is not exactly high paying, she has a great deal more financial resources now than after years of where she was working before. So out of a horrible night came some pretty good realizations for her. That, and of course she did not mean her words, she was pretty devastated, as was I, at the thought of our marriage ending.

In doing the K-1 I have committed myself to legal obligations for the care and financial maintenance of my wife, for 10 years, and was asking a serious question as to what my legal obligations are to USCIS in the event my wife does decide to leave prior to having her own right to be hear via 10 year green card or US citizenship. Obviously the hope for us both is that the marriage is forever, and I don't take it lightly, and some of the responses seem to suggest the inference that I do.

Having so recently gotten out of the clutches of USCIS I had no desire to get either of us back in to their sites! But I think I was, despite being quite despondent at the time, asking a serious question. What does USCIS expect me to do, any of us to do, if our K-1 spouses should abandon our marriages?

Anyway, thanks for all of the responses, even those that seem to be more about admonishing without all the facts!

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to everyone!

Were she to leave, and remain in the US, you would still be locked into the affidavit of support.

Yes I am. We know you love to spread misinformation, but were she to go on means tested benefits, they could come over the petitioner who signed an affadavit of support, even if the marriage didn't work out.

And I know this has been discussed before, but there's at least one divorce case where the I-864 was introduced as evidence that the spouse needed to support the immigrant even though the marriage had dissolved. Perhaps not the way it was meant to be interpreted, but that judge did interpret it that way.

You betcha!

Show me and prove it then.

[athena_ny 1]

Umm, I see how this works with you MM, anytime someone questions you or your statements it is "Misinformation or wrong". You remind me of the little spoiled kid at the playground that does not get her way and then cries out "Since I am losing I am taking my toys and going home you cheat and are not fair!" Nice try, but you need to show me and prove your statement is not disinformation for WE ALL KNOW you ramble on about topics which you are spreading disinformation and inaccuracies that are not correct about either. I am waiting for you to prove your statement on the affidavit of support all I see is your sanctimonious feelings being expressed here, prove it for a change please. AND if you cannot then stop making inaccurate disinformation statements about it.

Are you 110% sure?

Just wanted to thank all of you for the comments advising calm. Fortunately the day after I posted we had a very long talk, and worked out a ton of issues.

A late night phone call from her cousin, explaining that certain often repeated comments regarding wanting to go home, not wanting to be married, etc. were apparently common expressions used during arguments (large and small) from where both my wife and her cousin are from. Her cousin explained that during her first year (of a 10 year marriage to her German husband) she probably said such things at least a hundred times. The comments are blanket statements that "something" large or small is bothering them and not literal statements of desire to end the respective marriages. Her cousin has been married ten years now!

Anyway, we discussed that such statements may be common in the PI, at least where these two are from, but here they are heard quite literally. And it is nearly impossible to trust the strength of a marriage when they are repeated, which they have been for a few months.

As to those who commented that I wanted to turn to ICE at the first sign of a problem, no, not at all what I meant when posting. Nor is it exactly accurate to say I kicked her out, she was packing her things, and when I said if you are going to keep saying you want to go, you should go sooner not later, she called some friends, and wound up with a place to go that night. But I would also say, I want her to be happy, and if she isn't, then yes I would not want her to leave but would feel obligated to allow her too. I love her enough to sacrifice my heart for her, if that was what she chose.

All of this also showed her she is not as alone as she sometimes feels. She has some new, good friends! She also realized, that although her job is not exactly high paying, she has a great deal more financial resources now than after years of where she was working before. So out of a horrible night came some pretty good realizations for her. That, and of course she did not mean her words, she was pretty devastated, as was I, at the thought of our marriage ending.

In doing the K-1 I have committed myself to legal obligations for the care and financial maintenance of my wife, for 10 years, and was asking a serious question as to what my legal obligations are to USCIS in the event my wife does decide to leave prior to having her own right to be hear via 10 year green card or US citizenship. Obviously the hope for us both is that the marriage is forever, and I don't take it lightly, and some of the responses seem to suggest the inference that I do.

Having so recently gotten out of the clutches of USCIS I had no desire to get either of us back in to their sites! But I think I was, despite being quite despondent at the time, asking a serious question. What does USCIS expect me to do, any of us to do, if our K-1 spouses should abandon our marriages?

Anyway, thanks for all of the responses, even those that seem to be more about admonishing without all the facts!

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to everyone!

Were she to leave, and remain in the US, you would still be locked into the affidavit of support.

Yes I am. We know you love to spread misinformation, but were she to go on means tested benefits, they could come over the petitioner who signed an affadavit of support, even if the marriage didn't work out.

And I know this has been discussed before, but there's at least one divorce case where the I-864 was introduced as evidence that the spouse needed to support the immigrant even though the marriage had dissolved. Perhaps not the way it was meant to be interpreted, but that judge did interpret it that way.

Are you 110% sure?

Just wanted to thank all of you for the comments advising calm. Fortunately the day after I posted we had a very long talk, and worked out a ton of issues.

A late night phone call from her cousin, explaining that certain often repeated comments regarding wanting to go home, not wanting to be married, etc. were apparently common expressions used during arguments (large and small) from where both my wife and her cousin are from. Her cousin explained that during her first year (of a 10 year marriage to her German husband) she probably said such things at least a hundred times. The comments are blanket statements that "something" large or small is bothering them and not literal statements of desire to end the respective marriages. Her cousin has been married ten years now!

Anyway, we discussed that such statements may be common in the PI, at least where these two are from, but here they are heard quite literally. And it is nearly impossible to trust the strength of a marriage when they are repeated, which they have been for a few months.

As to those who commented that I wanted to turn to ICE at the first sign of a problem, no, not at all what I meant when posting. Nor is it exactly accurate to say I kicked her out, she was packing her things, and when I said if you are going to keep saying you want to go, you should go sooner not later, she called some friends, and wound up with a place to go that night. But I would also say, I want her to be happy, and if she isn't, then yes I would not want her to leave but would feel obligated to allow her too. I love her enough to sacrifice my heart for her, if that was what she chose.

All of this also showed her she is not as alone as she sometimes feels. She has some new, good friends! She also realized, that although her job is not exactly high paying, she has a great deal more financial resources now than after years of where she was working before. So out of a horrible night came some pretty good realizations for her. That, and of course she did not mean her words, she was pretty devastated, as was I, at the thought of our marriage ending.

In doing the K-1 I have committed myself to legal obligations for the care and financial maintenance of my wife, for 10 years, and was asking a serious question as to what my legal obligations are to USCIS in the event my wife does decide to leave prior to having her own right to be hear via 10 year green card or US citizenship. Obviously the hope for us both is that the marriage is forever, and I don't take it lightly, and some of the responses seem to suggest the inference that I do.

Having so recently gotten out of the clutches of USCIS I had no desire to get either of us back in to their sites! But I think I was, despite being quite despondent at the time, asking a serious question. What does USCIS expect me to do, any of us to do, if our K-1 spouses should abandon our marriages?

Anyway, thanks for all of the responses, even those that seem to be more about admonishing without all the facts!

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to everyone!

Were she to leave, and remain in the US, you would still be locked into the affidavit of support.

Yes I am. We know you love to spread misinformation, but were she to go on means tested benefits, they could come over the petitioner who signed an affadavit of support, even if the marriage didn't work out.

And I know this has been discussed before, but there's at least one divorce case where the I-864 was introduced as evidence that the spouse needed to support the immigrant even though the marriage had dissolved. Perhaps not the way it was meant to be interpreted, but that judge did interpret it that way.

You betcha!

Show me and prove it then.

I don't need to prove anything to you. It's common knowledge, and disinformation is not a word.

Nice try, play again.

(And if someone questions me with valid input, I'm game. You have no valid input.)

[diadromous mermaid 36]

Are you 110% sure?

I am sure. This is from USCIS' Final Rule on the Affidavit of Support.

Section 213A of the Act specifies the two circumstances that end the support obligation: The sponsored immigrant’s (1) naturalization or (2) having acquired 40 quarters of coverage under the Social Security Act.

The interim rule added two more: (1) The death of the sponsor or sponsored immigrant or (2) the

sponsored immigrant’s abandonment of status and permanent departure from the United States. These two additional grounds for termination exist as a matter of logical necessity.

Section 213A of the Act does not provide any basis to say that divorce does, or does not, affect a

support obligation under an affidavit of support. If the sponsored immigrant is an adult, he or she probably can, in a divorce settlement, surrender his or her right to sue the sponsor to enforce an

affidavit of support. The sponsored immigrant and the sponsor (or joint sponsor) may not, however, alter the sponsor’s obligations to DHS and to benefit-granting agencies.

Edited December 26, 2007 by diadromous mermaid

[Jengles 0]

Just attempted to read that document or parts of it. Seems in order for immigrants to get benefits...a) agency is to determine if immigrant has a sponsor, sponsor and spouse's assets are to be used to determine if immigrant gets benefits which even the document admits, by doing so the immigrant will get denied benefits, or will usually get denied since sponser and spouse's combined income will be over qualification guidelines.