John&Juvy

1) Economics. This is a multi-pronged subject. Filipinas have a cultural mandate to be a bastion of support for the family. A woman over the age of 25-30 in RP (Philippines) is considered "old" related to finding/keeping a job. This blatant age discrimination in RP affects men too, but perhaps not to the same extent. Even for Filipinas under the age of 25 job opportunities are rare. Thus the mandate to be able to support the family is difficult. Foreign lands offer less age discrimination. Foreign men, especially those who can travel to RP offer economic support. These men are also likely to be able to keep their career intact with no or little age discrimination.
2) At the risk of drawing the ire of some, Filipino males have an undesirable (broadly speaking--of course there are exceptions) set of mores. Mores are cultural/moral values. The machismo attitude runs deep in RP culture. It likely comes from RP's Spanish heritage. It is common for males to woo young females, impregnate them, and then dump them as now being worthless. Philippine men cheat. Again, though there are exceptions, the cultural mores come into play. A male who has the resources to me married and have children and who decides to maintain a second household with a kabit (mistress) is not looked down upon. Though not openly admired, most even within the family will tolerate this, and some will even clandestinely admire the male. Filipina's on the other hand rarely cheat. The book "Lust in Translation" tells that only Tibet and Ghana has women with this level of fidelity. We can ignore Ghana as a male who finds his wife cheating might kill her--a good reason to be faithful. This leaves RP's women very desirable in the eyes of many Westerners who find the mores of Western women with their "Sex in the City" attitude and their lack of fidelity undesirable.
3) Filipinas want white! It is utterly ironic that most Western women admire and try to emulate through tanning the skin color of many Filipinas. Western men enjoy women who are not pasty white--we like all shades of Filipina. Filipinas want their babies to be white and they are smart enough to know how to attain this.
4) Many Americans are culturally adaptable and most are polite and considerate (and indeed, there are exceptions). This runs in opposition to other nationalities such as the Koreans and Chinese. I apologize to those of Korean and Chinese heritage who might be here and realize again, there are exceptions--but having traveled a bit the Koreans and Chinese unless you are friends with one seem by and large simply rude and inconsiderate.
5) Filipinas crave stability. Young men, worldwide do not offer the type of stability--but older men do. (same 'ol caveat--a generalization) Filipinas are age-difference tolerant. In 1972 I remember reading an article that said that the average American woman desired a male partner 2-10 years older than them. Today if that article would be re-written the statistics would likely indicate that American women now want male partners 2-10 years younger than them. This creates a situation where RP offers what American men want, and had until the feminist movement changed things. I, at my age, am, generally speaking, not what American women want and they, especially from their attitudes/morels/mores are not what I want. And I, at my age, value a woman who wants a lifetime relationship and have found one.
6) As others have pointed out: America is a melting pot. Everyone can fit in. America has its share of problems these days, but it's still a wonderful country to move to.
7) American men want sumbissive women. Oops...who wrote that--not me, where is the erase button.
Indeed, this is a loaded subject and all too often misunderstood. To some "submissive" means that a Filipina might become a sort of slave, or second class citizen, kept barefoot and penniless down on the farm and be subjected to the sexual whims of the dominant male. Yet I believe that though this concept might exist--it is rather rare, and really not what most American men desire.
I prefer to remove the word "submissive," and as another poster here has done--interject the word "feminine."
Back in the '60's most women in America stayed home and raised kids while the husband worked. The husband made the decisions. This is far from the case today, in America most women work--indeed most have to work--such is the economics of today. But what it's really about is that the women of the sixties at least seemed happy to have a nice home, a loving husband and happy children. Women of today in America, at least to me, all too many have become "independent," or rather beyond independent. They don't need a husband--in fact millions are better off with no husband to worry about. America's nanny state gives a single mom quite a lot. Subsidized or free housing; free medical; free education (college) and oftentimes even assist the single mom in buying a car. In my opinion America's changed to where marriage is a negative thing and as girls become women in their fatherless environment--the need for keeping a husband around has taken on less importance. For me the close family values that the Philippines espouse is a treasure. That a Filipina is more likely to be happy with the basic necessities of life is a refreshing alternative to the last two American women who I dated about 5 years ago. Both, after a nice dinner, as I walked them to their car said exactly the same thing: Smiling each said: "Oh, which is your car?" I responded: "the older blue Honda Accord." Both reacted the same--there appeared an odd look on their face that might have had a bit of disgust in it. Neither asked: "Why do you drive such an old car?" (Note: It looks nice to me and runs quite nicely, but it is 11 years old) Had either asked, my answer would have been: "I don't place much status value on having to have a new car--I'd rather not have $400 a month car payments (or $800 a month with two cars) and I prefer to pay off the mortgage on my house or use the money for investing. Though I had a nice time with both of them--neither responded to further calls or emails. Sadly--if you don't have a new car in America, a large percentage of women will write you off. It's a terrible thing too as so many men become so stretched out on debt to maintain the supposed status of the new car and big "dollhouse," (a big fancy house) that eventually it is this very economic loop of debt that destroys their lives and their relationships. Filipinas tend not to be particularly materialistic. They seem to be happy with a nice house and a car that runs. I like that.
8) Filipinas don't smoke and don't like smoking. This is not the case of way too many American women.
9) We American males are astounded at how beautiful all the Filipinas are.

They found these near Mrs. T-B.'s hometown (on the edge of the Amazon) in a river where she had planned to take me swimming, gulp man.

Why does this question keep coming up? People always answer the same #######. Nothing good comes from this.
But, the truth is we are all different. So, stop trying to figure out why others do the things they do and just worry about yourself.
And as far as the whole green card thing. So what if that is their reason? Karma is a B*TCH.

Both countries have shared a great friendship over the years
A way to improve their quality of life...step up so to speak
They know how to be feminine and serve, even as nurses
They are calculating but not aggressive.
They know how to bide their time in achieving goals ...regardless of what they want/need

One thing is very certain...... a true "MAN" who love his Partner/Wife will never say such things like that......
Definitely that man has NO BALLS!!! and "RESPECT" to his Partner/Wife!

Has nothing to do with Filipinas at all. I don't know of any wives that would like to be thought as "a daughter" by their husband....
... I will leave it at that.

Beware of ever being alone with her again. SHe may stage soemthing to support a VAWA claim. Never ever meet her without someone you know there to be a witness to things. If she wants to pick up her things do NOT do it without someon there preferably police. Change the locks, change your credit card numbers.

Their I-864 has not been approved so he doesn't currently have any obligations and withdrawing it will prevent it from being approved.

OP, seriously, you need a chill pill.
You have been given soooo many advices already. Cross the bridge when you get there. At the rate you're going, you'll probably be a mental & emotional wreck by the time of your embassy interview. You wouldn't want that, right?

I think you may have a difficult time getting approved.
If your 2 red flags (I agree they are major potential red flags) come to light, they would affect your case.
The first marriage seems like an sham marriage that last just long enough to get the woman and her kids all set up in the US. I'm not saying that's what it was, just what it looks like.
The second thing may be a game changer if it came out. If they ask about the kid's father and it's not you and the kid was conceived while you were a couple, that's going to be tough to explain how your relationship is real if the woman sleeps with other men.
If I were you, I'd have Plan B ready because Plan A may be a longshot in my opinion.

Seriously? Have you taken a biology class?

The children of first cousins have increase risks for certain diseases. That's a far cry from "deformities." This isn't a horror movie where the kids are cyclops.

My masters in human genetics and 10 years at a biotech qualifies me to address your bigoted and wrong understanding of biology.

The Phillipines prohibits first cousin marriages. The Catholic Church practically bans it.
Given the cultural background that you and your fiancé are coming from, you will get extra scrutiny for marrying against cultural norms.
Gool luck.

Thanks everyone for your advice! I have a pretty good update. I moved out of his house yesterday and into my own apartment with a room mate. I have been able to relax for the first time in months and its the best feeling ever! Money is tight so i cant file for divorce yet. I only earn minimum wage and now my working hours are restricted due to child care. I left the house we shared yesterday taking only my clothes and half of our daughters clothes. He didnt even know that we had moved out i took so little. I told him in a text that we have our own apartment and we will be doing 50/50 shared custody of our daughter. I will have her while he works and he will have her when i work. I had my new work hours approved by my employer prior to doing this. I took her to his house this morning at the arranged time so im really hoping he gives her back to me on sunday as we agreed.
Last week he closed the joint account taking every penny we had and he didnt pay the rent on our house. He paid it today when he found out i left and had the locks changed. My suspicion is that he was trying to get us evicted so that i would be homeless and he could take the baby. Fortunately i was one step ahead of him and had looked at an apartment the same day i found this out!
So, im a free woman and it is wonderful. I have the kindest room mate who is looking out for me and a great (for the people, not the pay!) job which has been very flexible with my requests. The other job not so much but i am still counting myself as lucky to have it to begin with! I also have some great friends who i have met over here. So it really is onwards and upwards. Im hoping he will file for divorce and pay for it since that is the next step but i will still be saving up for it to file myself if he doesnt.
I found out he has been messaging my family telling them horror stories about the thing ive been doing (in his mind, none of it is the truth!) so im going to message them today for the first time in weeks and tell them i really am alive! I cut contact for a few weeks while i was planning to get out. I didnt want to leave a trail of what i was doing or have outside influences in my decision making. I hope they believe me over him!

I don't think you will have to many issues but why don't you get to know this girl a little more before you decide to get married and spend the rest of your lives together. How well do you really know her after only 2 months?

I would re-file. I wouldn't use an attorney. You can save money by using this website.



By the way, I don't think you need to wait 30 days to re-file.

Refile.. read the guides here.. follow check list.. read again.. look at examples. Read post in k1 forum to learn from others mistakes and look up what questions they are asking..
Save money. Lawyers
Big mistake u did but time to move on and do over

If it were me, I would forget the appeal idea and re-apply. Appeals are only for when USCIS is in the wrong and have made an error in the adjudication of your case. They aren't, because you didn't supply any supporting information whatsoever. The appeal will take a very long time and you'll be no closer at the end of it. Re-apply yourself, or if you don't want to, go with the attorney you mentioned. Your best option is to re-file, as USCIS have made no error.

I guess if who is throwing the baby shower will also the one that will spending the money lol. If they are 2 or more of you throwing the baby shower for her, then you all split the bills lol . We only spent maybe atleast $500.00 on my baby shower before. 16 Guest .
* Invitation Cards
* How many people you want to invite
* Kind of food and drinks you want to serve ( Make it or Order it )
* Location
* Theme (from the banners, plates, napkins and cups) only if you want
* Cake

Yeah, so he's delusional and thinks they can conquer America. So why not take him down then and be done with it?

if i were sending expensive items that are likely to be stolen. the only service i would consider is FED EX

2rjak means sex. it's a gay lingo. 2rjak or turjak rana means, only sex,needs sex,for sex,want sex..i assumed Jo is a name . obviously the conversation was plain joke.

I suppose it depends what your dreams are
Mine are political in nature and at one point while I was at university I had my dream job working for my home country's government.
Obviously, the dream is now quashed, and I have to come up with new ones! Hopefully I will learn German while there for 4 years and add that to the resume, but what if I am out of my sphere of expertise for four years?
Even graduate school, if your husband had had to pcs, would you have stayed at school and done long distance? Or would you have tried to move your program to another university and hope they recognized your studies to date?
I guess, I've been used to planning my life in five year blocks, and then suddenly I fell in love and I am now making new goals with him included in it. There's no way I want to do long distance again (unless he was deployed and we had no choice). What about you girls? Would you go long distance for your dream job, your dream school?

I think the best is communication, don't take it so bad on her if she flipped; there may be stereotypes in her culture in regards to pre-nups.
Maybe when she understands that a lawyer has to review it with her ammend it if necessary to be fair for both of you, she will not feel so scared and offended by it.