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About Twomoles

  • Rank
    Gold Member
  • Birthday 04/15/1962
  • Member # 24020

Profile Information

  • Gender
  • City
    Pennsylvania, USA
  • State

Immigration Info

  • Immigration Status
    K-1 Visa
  • Place benefits filed at
    Vermont Service Center
  • Country
  • Our Story
    Once upon a time there was two Moles. They met and fall in love, and found that they are soulmates, and greatest for each other, and need one another every day. They will be very, very happy Moles when together for good :)

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  1. I guess it depends on country you are from and how stark is the comparison. But you are right, you are not part of their day to day lives anymore, you do not sing along the local radio and understand local political humor. And in childhood memories grass is always greener no matter where you are from. My mini-me loved visiting, because at certain age, kids get along just fine. I remember seeing in Frankfurt airport, all color and langues toddlers were playing in one tune. Now that she is older and language is a barrier, she is starting to have a certain insecurity and resentment.
  2. I think I now have accents in both languages. And both are there to stay. With few exceptions, US people are generally welcoming. I do not have problem being American, I have people who back home think I am too American now for their nationalist standards.
  3. I have been here long enough that I do find many topics, especially, related to everyday life, to be easier to express in English. I mean, how do you start explaining the various car or health insurance policies to a European? I think somehow deep down I have found that my new country matches my personality and character more than my birth country ever did -the general kindness and people ease at interaction, the hero culture. I mean, what is nationalism? You kinda presume certain personality types, styles and interests to the region and keep pumping it for no reason other than you must, but no one knows why, except you were born there. I used to think that national identity is needed for ones personality realization, now I am thinking it is actually stripping individual from his dreams, and true character and keeps it in bondage. Does it even make sense? Because much of it just romanticized bologna. For example, am I supposed to like our ornaments, and outdated belief system or political opinions ? because I really dont. I like the songs but leave me alone with your knickknacks, and stop correcting my grammar, and I have my own thoughts, thank you. Here - there is no expectation like that of me and it is liberating.
  4. I think big moment was for me, that I realized that I understand American jokes and stand up comedy, better than the current humor back at my birth country. Once you start getting political jokes and getting Dr Seuss, but lose touch and interest about the ones back home, you are turned.
  5. Ha, very interesting. I think maybe it is because the commercials and thinking here is not conditioned by what is one thing worth against the other, in comparison, so not so much like - what you can afford at the moment, does this moment validates spending that amount for you, and for this item, but more like inner haggling looking for a "deal".
  6. Vent: So I am the only rare bird around here, everyone speaks English around me, I have friends and my kid has friends and we are social butterflies. Now, needless to say, since I do not have environment to expose her, and we speak English at home, I have not been able to teach her my birth language. Firstly I am having troubles to find modern materials. And also probably time and well, because, you know - life. Because I started working next day I was home after my C -section, instead of having a year long maternity leave. Worrying about language living on 4 hours of sleep was last thing on my mind. And then it just, well, went on. Working mom with plenty of obligations and extracurricular activities, laundry and dinner too, and English speaking friends, that project always was pushed into back burner. While many here might understand my struggle, for some reason it seems people back at my country are such proud nationalists, that it seems they think that language is genetic, or you get infected with it like a virus, while joking, it almost seems that way, at least in the eyes of the ones who stay, mostly older generation. The generation that left , the newer world wanderers, and did not teach them language somehow are failures. That it is bad enough to betray and leave, but I did not even have the shame to make it my priority. They just say - but you need to speak. Yap, that is just how it happens. IN the middle of my wonderful relationship with my kiddo , I am just going to start speaking and problem solved. Not! It gets so tiresome to listen to their patronizing and useless advice about teaching, you know, that pretty much consists of " you do not try hard enough and just speak". The problem is that the same outdated generation or the cranky ones who have not been beyond the borders, is the one that develops teaching materials, and there is pretty much no material that I could use, say on ipad, that would assume that that language is now a second language, and you gotta start from zero. And in reality, it is exposure and environment that teaches the most, when she is old enough to go to some camp, kids pick up from other kids completely effortlessly. They just can not accept it and get over it, that if it is not around me, I am alone against the avalanche, and they just do not get it - like at all. And yes, I am not trying too hard. Because I love my bond with her, and our bonds with our friends, and they all happen in English. Rant over.
  7. So just wondering and contemplating about your thoughts and experiences. I wanted to know, after how long time or after what kind of events, you settled your mind and knew - this is it. I am more American than where I came from. I am not even feeling like half and half anymore, or something of one or other. When did you start to feel that at your birth country - you are a visitor, and US - this is a true forever home? Was it gradual, or was it a cathartic event? When did you start thinking and dreaming in English as your default language?
  8. I have 10 year GK now, does my husband need to fill it too?
  9. Has anyone filed late about their address change after the move? Did it affect you?
  10. Three questions: 1. We have had our share of tax issues over the years. We have had installment plan with IRS too. All is paid with Feds. But right now we have two open years with the state, both of them are pending appeal right now, but all is filed. (they reassessed my 2011, pretty much out of the blue, an I was late with 2015 and they re-assesed that too). And I am disagreeing about the amount in both cases. So the N-400 application question on part 12 no 6 goes like this : Do you owe any overdue Federal, state, or local taxes? Yes or No Question on form: Have you EVER not filed a Federal, state, or local tax return since you became a lawful permanent Yes/ No So do I technically owe state taxes? Decision has not been made yet? I of course feel that I do not, but state thinks I do? Question on form "Have you ever not filed? So they are all filed as of now, but we have not filed them timely, well quite often. What is my answer? 2. If I am ever asked about this, for example during an interview. I really do not have answer without throwing my husband under the bus. My old me, relayed on my husband and trusted that he knows what is going on, and we always got in trouble, and I really did not have much clue, since where I am from, yearly taxes are not mandated from individuals. My new " me" years later stepped up to the plate , took it over, went through all the learning curves, and year by year chizzled them away. How do I answer that question which possibly will come up, without sounding like a whiny wife who talks bad about her husband. (We have been married for over 10 years, so sometimes you just gotta step up and stop waiting for miracle) 3. Can my citizenship be denied? How often does that happen. Would that affect my Green Card?
  11. Hello, everyone! I hope you have some stories to share: So I should finally apply for citizenship, I have not done it yet - for no particular reasons other than just daily life gets me. And one bigger reason - IRS. We do not have a good track record with IRS, we were self employed and I kinda inherited my husbands mess, and for first couple years I naively thought that he is going to take care of it, and for the most part at the beginning I did not have much clue about it anyway, and then we had a baby and we were seriously broke... Not to throw my husband under the bus, he is great, aside from this tax thing... Then I decided to just tackle it all, and now - I am up to date and current - yay! And we have repayment installment plan with IRS for 2012 and 2015, that I pay every month. I yet need to do 2017 too. And I still have to straighten out some things about local and state taxes and go through certain learning curves. who knew it can be so complicated? I read conflicting accounts, some say that if I have a plan with IRS, I should be fine , others say - it shows my bad moral character, and I can be denied citizenship altogether. It really sounds terrible, I have not ever broken any law, but I guess the law says to file taxes on every 15th. Please advise.
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