catie-b

Proper Cadbury's

Sounds like someone can't follow instructions on a form. You missed signing a document and that make the process hard enough that you suggest others get a lawyer?

when you get out of the airplane, take your carry on to the rest room, wash face, fix hair.many people forget this.

Since you entered on a K-1 then you can only adjust status based on your marriage to your I-129F petitioner. Since that marriage never happened then your adjustment of status application will be denied. It is not a question of if your I-485 will be denied, but when.
Take your lawyer's advice, leave the US, and file for a CR-1 immigrant visa.

You are of equal value to society as anyone else. Unfortunately our government does not operate on that principle.
Right now the government is humanizing all these illegal aliens, Boo Hoo everybody cry for them and put them at the head of the line while everyone trying to do it legally like yourself is spat upon.
Yes, it has to be hard - your feelings are understandable and I am sorry you are going through this. Hope you have an understanding boyfriend, regardless of whether you are marrying him.

Your comment bashing Chinese Nationals and other foreigners is small minded and against TOS.
This is an immigration site and nobody will stop their petition because you failed to adequately understand the culture of your wife.
I have not read one thing that says she scammed you, you had a big fight about her son moving in which should have been discussed
and agreed upon but to not picking him up from the airport and her walking in the cold to pick him up is lack of responsibility on your part
and plain childish.
YOU should never again marry a foreigner, because YOU don't get it.
Was I scammed before ? Yes, by Americans ! I am also a naturalized citizen and take it as an insult for you to say don't marry a foreigner.
Be accountable for your own poor choices and stop generalizing and stereotyping.
You should make sure your communication skills match that of your spouse when you chose one or have the patience to work on it with her
and understand the culture that comes into play.

When did I say that you dont have a right to be upset and make this a big deal? And when did I say that people don't ever get scammed? But don't sit there and basically disrespect the rest of our relationships by calling them scams just because your situation didn't work out. This isn't a judgment; this is you insulting a specific culture and essentially telling us not to get a K1 visa because your wife scammed you, and you somehow think this is what every foreign person does.
I don't think that many people want to take that advice because a good portion of us are on here for the purpose of GETTING MARRIED to a foreigner and doing the K1 process. Not every one of us is in a scam relationship. I think I'll take my chances with my man.
Lol. You aren't saving anyone by insulting people. Who is going to take you seriously when you're sitting there and telling people not to marry foreigners because they're all scammers? Sorry, man, but that's not gonna happen. Good luck to ya.

I'm pretty sure this post will get reported, since you blatantly insulted not only those who are Chinese, but you also pretty much insulted anyone marrying on a K1 visa, implying that everyone will deal with the unfortunate situation that you did. Which, I'm sorry that you had to go through that, but that doesn't give you the right to tell others that they're being scammed by dating a foreigner and to "just marry American". If I wanted an American man, I'd have one. But I don't, thank ya very much.

I'm sorry you had a bad go of things but to categorize all non-U.S. women that way is kinda extreme, don't ya think?

Excuse me? What else can we do other than to be patient? please enlighten me... Majority of us are stuck at Texas and I'm almost 4 months in, so I don't have to be 7 months in to encourage someone and tell them to hang on and be patient. We're all in the waiting game together, we're all going to be frustrated but at the end of the day there is nothing we can do to speed up the process so what other options do we have other than to sit and wait? I wasn't aware that saying "be patient" was a bad word

Got married 3 weeks after arrival
Did two weddings, first one in a park with a few of her family, did that for the AoS process, then did bigger family and friends one 6 months later.
AoS has taken 9 months.
I work abroad mostly in Europe so getting EAD/AP was important to me.
I wish people had told me how expensive stuff was in the US compared to UK, housing, medical, bread, cheese, beer.

I don't have a real solution for you, but I want to let you know that I feel for you.
I think it is kinda sad that so many people are telling you to just be patient, your time will come, etc...
I know that if they had their petition lost between USCIS approval and NVC they would be nervous as well. It does not
take almost 3 months for it to get there. I know it didn't mine, and if you look at the timelines it doesn't take anyone else
that long either.
The only little advice I can give is to contact representives or maybe look into an attorney.
But....don't just wait and be patient like other people are saying. I know they wouldn't in your shoes.

Firstly, Nich helped me and I am very, very appreciative of her sober, calm advice and guidance. If she really does not come back, then she will be sorely missed and it will be much to the detriment of the new waves of applicants coming through that there are less valued contributors on hand to provide them with good information and give them a reality check when it's needed.
In order to become a valued contributor (and to people going through the often stomach-churning experience of attaining a visa to re-uinte with a loved one, valued contributors are a life-line) you have to be around for a while, soak up information, sort it out in your head, see lots of different experiences and learn from them. It takes time and patience to build up that experience. Everyone is transient to an extent, no one is going to be on this forum forever and I imagine everyone has a point at which they want to quit. However, on the UK forum at least, valued contributors are leaving (forced or otherwise) faster than they can be replaced.
I haven't been a member for very long, read more than I post and when I do post have too often been one of those frantic "what comes next" folks. I want to cut down on that. As I move to AOS I would like to offer my experiences going through the UK K-1 stream, such as they are, to people going through the same thing, but my breadth of experience isn't so broad (and my patience not so strong) as people who are very dedicated and keep these pages on track with up to date information for new, scared, nervous folk taking on a challenge that may effect their relationship for better or worse, depending on how smoothly it goes. If I was just joining the forum now I would have a harder time understanding the process than when I joined last summer. I fear for those people who are just starting out.

That's so sad. Nich-Nick is essentially the only reason I stick around here. She does *so* much for people here (did you know she helps new immigrants do things like their tax returns on here, for instance?).
If she's out, I'm out.

Doesn't sound like instruction to me. Sounds like: "Do you understand that would be declaring a fraudulent use of a visitor privilege?"
If this is the thread that caused Nich to be suspended because of an ambiguous reading, this is bogus. Sorry. Nich has been one of the most outstandingly helpful members on VJ, ever. To even think she would recommend visa fraud is absurd.

She really helped me out a lot by replies to forums and personal messages, by calmly explaining the facts and telling me when I was being stupid. I really appreciated her contributions to this forum. Many forums are fairly trivial, but for the people on this forum we know that VJ is not trivial. For many of us VJ is a life-line to our loved ones. The official guidance can be so vague and opaque that somewhere like VJ for many people can mean the difference between being re-united successfully or not with the person/people that they love. I have been apart with Sophie (USC) for 2 years of our 4 years together, but now that I am 10 days away from entering the US to reunite with her I know my visa process would have been so much more painful, confusing and a strain on our long-distance relationship without the years of accumulated knowledge on VJ. Nich represents a great deal of that accumulated knowledge and if she really isn't coming back that the UK VJ forum is that much poorer without that knowledge.
I'm not sure how much help I can be, but I'll certainly try to help out with questions I understand.

I met my husband online 11 years ago on a completely non-related to immigration site. Tomorrow is our 10 year anniversary of being together. We made life plans based on our situation, which included me moving over there. If we'd have any inkling of the separation that we'd be going through due to the USCIS, we would have made different plans. Our desire to do everything the "right" way has resulted in our current separation. We accepted that we'd need to be separated for several months. Never did we think we'd be still sitting here a year later.
Why all this complaining? Because our immigration issues never took precedence over our relationship. And now, immigration has been the defining factor of our relationship for a year. Because my children cry to me every day that they miss their daddy. Because I actually miss my husband. It's because the USCIS continues to state that they're having delays, but has shown no actual sign of fixing the problem. Because the NVC is unprepared to deal with things like federal holidays or winter in New Hampshire, which happen every year. Their inability to deal with reality or February is once again delaying our process. Are you suggesting that I should be super happy that we may be delayed several more months?
Well, I'm not. Nor am I blaming the DACA filers or illegal aliens. I actually support amnesty and DACA, with the caveat that the entire immigration system should be overhauled to avoid these problems in the future. I believe that people who follow the laws should come first. That doesn't mean that I don't think others shouldn't be serviced, just that they shouldn't be given preference.
And I can, and will complain all I want. If you don't like reading complaints, then stop coming into threads where it's obvious there's going to be a lot of complaining. The other people on this site are some of the few people out there who can commiserate and truly understand what I'm going through.That can be the difference between a good day, and a laying curled up in a dark room crying day.

Um I don't like moaning about illegals or getting political but you should know your facts because the precise reason we have all waited so long is that illegals "took our place" at USCIS. For some reason known only to USCIS and Obama they sat on our files and ignored them while prioritising DACA filers. Yes we did all make a choice to have a relationship with someone from another country and we are all paying a decent sum of money to have our petitions worked on. Other countries work on this a lot faster and with the amount of money we pay for the service we have every right to be frustrated at waiting over a year to be with our families.
If you don't have anything positive or constructive to contribute then please leave the thread to those of us that do.

Really ?
If someone broke into your home without you knowing it and called themselves a "undocumented resident" of your house - would you allow it ?
B.S. my friend is folks like you and your president devaluing american citizenship by giving these people access to American nationality like hot cakes.
They ARE taking our places with USCIS.
THEY WERE PROCESSED AHEAD of the rest of us.
And now they're coming back to flood the system.
AGAIN
Who are you to tell us how to react to the blatant politicization of law enforcement and immigration law for favorable electoral outcomes ?

1. Why does the fact that I met my wife while studying abroad on a US-government sponsored program make my relationship invalid?
2. Why is it that countries like Spain and India are able to give foreign spouses of their citizens permanent, legal residence in less than 1 month?
3. If they have to "scrutinize everyone entering in this Country t's their job" why shouldn't illegal immigrants have to leave and go through the same process?
4. Where do you get off telling us not to "whine" when the only reason people are talking about amnesty, and the only reason DACA is a reality, is due to the incessant whining of the Latino and illegal immigrants communities?
5. If our "whines" should not be heard, then why should we listen to the "whining" of people who knew what they were doing when the broke the law? The KNEW that there was no path to legal citizenship when they came here 20 years ago, so why should we give them a prize just for being able to cheat the system all these years?

Guys, I know you don't want to hear this but hang in there. I have not lived with my husband under the same roof since June 2011 (different immigration issues involving a J-1 visa, two year rule - we could not file for the IR-1 until about six months ago.)
I fight with my husband a lot and this is only lately. I also have thought of divorce and this has affected me psychologically. I missed all of my wedding anniversaries and never got to celebrate any bday with him since we got married. I can't even go out to public places without feeling anxious or depressed when I see couples together. I seriously sit there with the worst jealousy and wish that was me.
Two weeks ago, I went to the ER in the middle of the night because of an asthma attack brought on by anxiety... this never happened to me before. I was lying in bed thinking about all sorts of things - including immigration and I couldn't breathe.
It sucks but there is nothing we can do but wait. I would suggest keep bugging the senator, congressperson, the NVC, or whomever.
The only thing that keeps me going is to know that the love I share with my husband (regardless of my thoughts, which we all have) and this experience is something that very few people can go through. Just about everyone has told me "I don't know how you do it. I could never do it" which to me says "I don't love my spouse that much." In fact, yesterday, someone was complaining to me (again) about having to drive 2 hours to see a girl he's dating. And then criticized me for having a long distance relationship saying those never work. well you know what FU is my answer! And all these things serve to show me that what I have is unique and that when we are, in fact, together again, things will be better than before (after marriage counseling if necessary because let me tell you from past experience... it takes adjusting to your spouse who has essentially become somewhat of a stranger. Skype is no substitute for being together as we all know.)
I have faith that things will be better for all of us and that we can show people what love is... regardless of the turmoil our hearts feel and our relationships endure.
HANG IN THERE! <3 I am so grateful for you guys... we can all relate to each other and understand each other!

It is very hard I admit that but I simply refused to let it intimidate me to the point of feeling so freaked out, though I had my moments.
AP was 16 months in a black hole of the unknown, an abyss I wish on no one.
I would have gladly accepted the end result being an approval but alas it was a refusal and a return.
That made it so hard that I had to take a break from re filing for a few month because I was mentally and emotionally exhausted.
We continued to nurture and focus on our relationship like we always have and when I felt strong enough I started
gathering all the supporting evidence again and filled out the forms.
I realize that AP can happen again but somehow you settle yourself along the way and look forward with positive energy.
When I make up my mind, I mean really make up my mind on something nothing can steer me away from my goal.
I am a Christian and my faith in God's timing has made me able to hang in there.
I live my life, though we feel frozen in time sometimes, I do what I can to stay positive, do yoga, walk, pursue my interests and try to
not succumb to simply existing but really enjoy the present time and live a life of gratitude, encouraging others and taking my eyes off
my own problems.
I am thankful for what I have and am blessed with. It comes down to a deliberate choice of how I want my attitude to flow.
Every day it is about making that choice and it has become easier the more I do it.
When dark thoughts try to creep in I quickly and calmly replace them with positive affirmations. Mind over matter. It works !
Don't struggle....just be. Be happy.
This process has a way of taking you out of your comfort zone and you grow and dig deep like you haven't before until you
too will come to know that you can do this.
One day at a time......

Interesting read, this topic. I'm English and have been here for 5 years. And I can honestly say I miss very little about the UK. Some things, but not much. Because for everything I miss from home, there's a perfectly adequate (and usually better) substitute here.
Sure, I miss a proper local pub - but I sure as hell don't miss standing 4-deep at the bar trying to get served at last orders. I LOVE the table service at American bars (and the sports bars are just the nuts). I miss fish 'n' chips from a proper chippy - but the proper, hand patted burgers made from freshly ground beef you get here make the skinny, frozen patties on offer at home look pitiful. I miss our football - in the sense of physically being able to go to a game - but we get more games on TV here than you do at home. And I've come to love the American version. And whilst the fans of opposing teams sitting together kinda takes the tribalism out of things, the pre-match tailgating is fantastic - can you imagine tailgating at a West Ham/Chelsea game!!!???? Somebody mentioned butter - Land 'o' Lakes will fill your dairy needs just as well as Lurpak, trust me. And as for Salt 'n' Vinegar crisps, yes, Lays make them. In humongous bags. And they look/taste just like Walkers. I'd also recommend another Lays product - Stax. They're like Pringles except better. And the Salt 'n' Vinegar ones are awesome.
Something else I don't miss about home - motoring expenses. You can shove paying $9-a-gallon where the sun don't shine! I drive a 5.6 litre, V8 pickup truck here - the fuel costs alone would bankrupt me at home. And I get to drive my truck on big, long, wide, (comparatively) empty highways here in the Midwest (as opposed to shitty, windy, little B-roads at home). And somewhere to live? Here (I'm about an hour North of Kansas City, MO) $100,000 (so what, about 60k English?) gets you a detached (oh, how my American friends laugh at that) 3 bed place with a basement in an acre of land. Name me ANYWHERE in the UK where you get that kind of bang for your housing buck!
There are some downsides to living here, of course. Yes, the healthcare is an issue. Not the standard of care you receive (and the promptness with which its delivered) but the deductibles/co-pays. I have insurance through work. It runs me about $70-a-month. But it's an 80/20 policy (which is the norm these days) and the plan only picks up the 80% after I've met the annual deductible of $1,000. And then I'm on the hook for more until annual -of-pocket maximum is reached (about $3,500 in my case).
What I simply can't ###### stand most of all though, is the GLUT of God/Jesus bollocks. Seriously, it's a nightmare. And the rank hypocrisy! I used to think I was conservative, politically speaking, until I moved out here. Now I realize just how ultra-liberal (by American standards) I really am. The conservative (Republican) movement is intrinsically linked to organized religion, specifically Christianity in a bazillion different forms. And you'd better believe you're going to hell in a handcart unless you're A) White B ) Straight C ) Wealthy D) Accepting of Christ and E ) Go to "my" church, mister!!!! Awful!
But I have to say that, all in all, the pros of living stateside far outweigh the cons. I'm happy here, and have every intention of spending the rest of my life here. My advice to any of you embarking on this journey is rather than pine about the things you miss from home, to embrace the culture of your new home. As a guy, I found the easiest way to do that was through sport. Yes, absolutely I took the pi$$ out of baseball and referred to it as "rounders." Now I can't wait for the new season to start. Yes, I derided American football as "rugby for poofs." Now, if The St Louis Rams lose (and they frequently do) I'm genuinely pi$$ed off for the rest of the week!
Life really is what you make it, folks. Especially for people in our situation. Enjoy it!

What she described is nothing but abuse. Are you serious?

I totally agree with this. It also amazes me how many petitioners leave it up to the beneficiary to compelete all the paper work. I could never imagine leaving that up to my fiance to do. Especially since English is not her first language, even though she knows it very well. I will and have done anything I can to be with my Fiance and eventually bring her here to be with me. I never once was too busy to do what was required. What is a little sacrifice now for a lifetime of happiness? Was it a hassle? Yes, and some things have taken longer than I liked, but I always did what was required. I was even initially denied after waiting 5 months, so I started over and spent even more time researching, gathering info, double, and triple checking everything. All I did was think how in the end it will all be worth the effort and compared to most trials in life, this is really not that big of a hassle or too much to ask of me to do. If this process is too much for someone to do, then imagine what will happen when other bigger obstacales are encountered down the road in life. Honestly, if this is too much for someone to do, then I have to question how important the relationship or person is to the petitioner.