VAWA, Part 27

[LittlebyLittle 18]

10 minutes ago, balo101 said:

what i understood is visas related to outside of USA in those 75 countries. I think people from those countries inside USA are fine. 

Yes, i understood the same thing after researching some additional information 

[TBoneTX 49,096]

Let's not freak out or go entirely aysheep.

Often, such news reports are written and edited by those unfamiliar with immigration and visas.

They often leave out key information that makes a big difference.

Be patient until everything becomes clearer.

[AdamsM 4]

5 hours ago, LittlebyLittle said:

Hello everyone! Dod you see the latest news? Immigrant visas processing will stop for 75 countries. Will it apply only to those who has not been admitted to the country yet or to everyone? For example, if you are from one of this 75 countries, currently living in US with VAWA application pending. How will

you be affected by this new announcement?? 

what i saw was interviews will continue to hold within the country but no decision will be made. And that this affects immigrant visas (green cards, citizenships..etc. My lawyer said the same thing. I am stil awaiting a decision after interview. Just taking it one day at a time.

[TBoneTX 49,096]

Sunday!  Time for our Official Weekly VAWA-Thread Joke:

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PEDRO THE QUOTE MASTER

It was the first day of school and a new student, Pedro, the son of a Mexican telecom tycoon, entered the fourth grade.

 

The teacher said, "Let's begin by reviewing some American history.  Who said 'Give me Liberty, or give me Death?'"

 

She saw a sea of blank faces, except for Pedro, who had his hand up.

 

"Patrick Henry, 1775."

 

"Very good!  Now, who said "Government of the people, by the people, for the people, shall not perish from the earth'?"

 

Again, no response except from Pedro: "Abraham Lincoln, 1863," said Pedro.

 

The teacher snapped at the class, "Class, you should be ashamed.  Pedro, who is new to our country, knows more about its history than you do.

 

She heard a loud whisper: "Screw the Mexicans."

 

"Who said that?" she demanded.

 

Pedro put his hand up.  "Jim Bowie, 1836."

 

At that point, a student in the back said, "I'm gonna puke."

 

The teacher glared and asked, "All right!  Now, who said that?"

 

Pedro said, "George Bush to the Japanese Prime Minister, 1991."

 

Now furious, another student yelled, "Oh, yeah?  Suck this!"

 

Pedro jumped out of his chair waving his hand and shouting to the teacher, "Bill Clinton to Monica Lewinski, 1997!"

 

Now, with almost a mob hysteria, someone said, "You little brat.  If you say anything else, I'll kill you."

 

Pedro frantically yelled at the top of his voice, "Gary Condit to Chandra Levy, 2001."

 

The teacher fainted, and as the class gathered around her on the floor, someone said, "Oh, poop -- we're in BIG trouble now!"

 

Pedro whispered, "Saddam Hussein, 2003."
 

[TBoneTX 49,096]

Oh, goodness... consecutive posts, this one with Wednesday's Semiofficial Semiweekly VAWA-Thread Joke:

===========================================

THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN ECONOMIC SYSTEMS

 

TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM:  You have 2 cows.  You sell one and buy a bull.  Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows.  You sell them and retire on the income.

 

SOCIALISM:  You have 2 cows.  The government takes one and gives it to your neighbor.

 

COMMUNISM:  You have 2 cows.  The State takes both and gives you some milk.

 

FASCISM:  You have 2 cows.  The State takes both and sells you some milk.

 

NAZISM:  You have 2 cows.  The government takes both and shoots you.

 

BUREAUCRATISM:  You have 2 cows.  The State takes both, shoots one, milks the other, and throws the milk away.

 

VENTURE CAPITALISM:  You have 2 cows.  You sell 3 of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, and then execute a debt-to-equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all 4 cows back, with a tax exemption for 5 cows.  The milk rights of the 6 cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island company secretly owned by the majority shareholder, who sells the rights to all 7 cows back to your listed company.  The annual report says the company owns 8 cows, with an option on one more.

 

[TBoneTX 49,096]

Wow -- another 3-in-a-row joke event!  It is Sunday, so here is our Official Weekly VAWA-Thread Joke:

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REFLECTIONS

 

I'm not saying let's go kill all the stupid people; I'm just saying let's remove all the warning labels and let the problem sort itself out.

 

I changed my car horn to gunshot sounds.  People move out of the way much faster now.

 

To me, "drink responsibly" means don't spill it.

 

I didn't make it to the gym today.  That makes five years in a row.

 

You can tell a lot about a woman's mood just by her hands.  For instance, if she's holding a gun, she's probably angry.

 

In case of fire, exit the building before tweeting about it.
 

[TBoneTX 49,096]

Four jokes in a row... a record!  It's still Wednesday in some places, so here's our Semiofficial Semiweekly VAWA-Thread Joke:

===========================================
THE SMART BABY

 

A visitor in the hospital was walking through the newborns' room.  He looked at one baby and smiled, then said, "Hi, I'm George.  What's your name?"

 

The baby said, "Alex."

 

The man looked at him in shock, and asked, "When were you born?"

 

"Three days ago, at 6:20 pm," said the baby.

 

The man asked, "Who are your parents?"

 

The baby replied, "My mom is Laura Princeton; she is a programmer, in room number 6.  Dad Thomas Princeton, an engineer, should come visiting in three hours."

 

"Amazing! said the man.  "How do you know all of this already?"

 

"Well, I wasn't born yesterday, you know."

 

[TBoneTX 49,096]

Five consecutive posts with our VAWA-Thread Jokes, this one our Official Weekly VAWA-Thread Joke:

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

PUNNY THOUGHTS FOR THE DAY

 

To the person who stole my diary and then died:  My thoughts are with your family.

 

At first, I thought my chiropractor wasn't any good, but now I stand corrected.

 

I used to hate facial hair, but then it grew on me.

 

I used to be able to play piano by ear, but now I have to use my hands.

 

I used to run a dating service for chickens, but then I was struggling to make hens meet.

 

I broke my finger last week, but then on the other hand, I'm OK.

 

I was wondering why the baseball kept getting bigger and bigger.  Then it hit me.

 

I wanted to eat a watch for lunch, but it was too time-consuming.

 

I stayed up all night wondering where the sun went, but then it dawned on me.

 

I used to be addicted to basketball, but then I rebounded.

 

After dinner, Mom asked if I could clear the table.  I needed a running start, but then I made it.

 

We're renovating the house.  The first floor is going great, but the second floor is another story.

 

[shiva32 241]

Hi All, I had my n400 interview today. Brought my lawyer and thick binder of all documents with me. Officer was kind and didn't ask for any documents except green card, old and current passport, and driving license. Didn't ask about vawa /abuse except for asking how I got LPR. Officer said I am approved. Placed in line for oath ceremony scheduling. This forum was invaluable throughout this journey (filed i360 in 2019). I will always be grateful for the critical knowledge I got from this forum. 

[TBoneTX 49,096]

34 minutes ago, shiva32 said:

Officer said I am approved.

Yee-HAAAAA!   

[Note to T-B.'s self:  Jokes worked again... jokes worked again...  ]

35 minutes ago, shiva32 said:

Placed in line for oath ceremony scheduling.

Let us know when it happens, and give us a full report!

35 minutes ago, shiva32 said:

This forum was invaluable throughout this journey (filed i360 in 2019). I will always be grateful for the critical knowledge I got from this forum. 

Your gracious words and sincere appreciation will make all contributors here feel good, and you give hope to everyone who's still waiting.   

[TBoneTX 49,096]

Our jokes are really effective (see above)!  Accordingly, here's our Semiofficial Semiweekly VAWA-Thread Joke:

==================================

PUNNY THOUGHTS

 

I saw a theft at an Apple store, so that makes me an iWitness.

 

I'm Buzz Aldrin, second man to step on the moon.  Neil before me!

 

To the person who stole my laptop with my copy of Microsoft Office on it:  I will find you.  You have my Word!

 

To the person who stole my glasses:  I will find you.  I have contacts.

 

To the person who stole my place in line:  I'm after you now!

 

To the person who stole my limbo stick:  That was a new low.

 

To the person who stole my dictionary:  I have no words.

 

To the person who stole my bed:  I won't rest until I find you.

 

To the person who stole my depression medication:  I hope you're happy now.

 

To the person who stole my case of energy drinks:  I hope you can't sleep at night.

 

To the person who stole my power steering:  I just can't handle it.