Just wanted to say thanks ...

[EllisAndRenz 193]

I know the other thread is locked.  I've read each and every piece of advice.   (Even those that disagree with me and that's perfectly fine).

Going forward no more saying "love you" to the ex.  I get that.  

As of today she wants to reconcile.  I do too, but I  have to deal with the fact that she accused me of something that was an outright lie.  I do need to find a way to get past that, protect myself going forward.   That does scare me.  

Anyway: Today is a calmer day.   Wish me luck.  

 

 

[Adventine 3,187]

Good luck and whatever the outcome of your marriage, hope you find peace and healing going forward.

[Chancy 6,233]

Normally, I'd be in the camp that would advise "divorce, move on, and find your happiness" if a spouse exhibits extreme crazy antics.  But today I read a post in the Philippine sub-forum about a wife who went crazy on her husband, including a kitchen knife wielding incident.  Turns out the wife had undiagnosed strokes and was suffering from early dementia.

 

Unfortunately, even in 2021, talking about mental health problems is still taboo for many Filipinos.  If you can somehow bring up the topic in a way that clearly and lovingly shows concern for your wife's well-being, maybe a psychological or psychiatric assessment would be a good idea.  It may uncover any issues that would warrant treatment beyond marriage counseling.

 

I wish you both well.

 

Edited May 5, 2021 by Chancy
clarification

[EllisAndRenz 193]

40 minutes ago, Chancy said:

Normally, I'd be in the camp that would advise "divorce, move on, and find your happiness" if a spouse exhibits extreme crazy antics.  But today I read a post in the Philippine sub-forum about a wife who went crazy on her husband, including a kitchen knife wielding incident.  Turns out the wife had undiagnosed strokes and was suffering from early dementia.

 

Unfortunately, even in 2021, talking about mental health problems is still taboo for many Filipinos.  If you can somehow bring up the topic in a way that clearly and lovingly shows concern for your wife's well-being, maybe a psychological or psychiatric assessment would be a good idea.  It may uncover any issues that would warrant treatment beyond marriage counseling.

 

I wish you both well.

 

Yes, we do have to address the elephant in the room.  The false allegations.  She's admitted to me that it wasn't true, so I guess that's a first step.  That's the one thing that hurts the most that's going to be the hardest thing for me to get past.   But let's see how it goes.  I know how she feels about a great many things now and some are super easy to address (like how I talk to my ex ...  so that's fine.)  The rest will take some time, but so long as she doesn't go off the deep end again I think we will be OK.  And yes, to your point about a psychiatrics assessment, not a bad idea.  I'll go with her and that should remove the stigma.  🙂

 

But again, thank you all for taking the time to read and respond.  

[EllisAndRenz 193]

Is there any way to delete the original thread?  

As good as the advice is, I'm hoping this can just become a bad memory one day.

 

[Chancy 6,233]

1 minute ago, EllisAndRenz said:

Is there any way to delete the original thread?  

 

Click "Report post" on the other thread and request the mods to delete it.

 

[TBoneTX 43,045]

All the best to you, brother.