HELP!!!!!! LONG ROAD AHEAD....

[We_Destiny 1]

I't like an addiction... I honestly check both VJ and my email atleast every half hour. The worst part is that I have just began my journey. I hope this is just the initial excitement that goes with filing a petition. I do hope that some of my eagerness, frantic-ness subsides a little. I can't imagine being held prisoner by a computer and two websites.

What does everyone do to pass the time and not constantly check status. Please, assist me with your ideas.

[bora bora 1]

Work

Work

Study

Friends

Family

Work

Drink

...and the visa is still always in the bank of my mind.

Good luck on your journey.

[payxibka 10,048]

OMG, 4 days into the process and you are checking every 1/2 hour? You are in for an ulcer.....

[LookyWhatIFound 38]

I't like an addiction... I honestly check both VJ and my email atleast every half hour. The worst part is that I have just began my journey. I hope this is just the initial excitement that goes with filing a petition. I do hope that some of my eagerness, frantic-ness subsides a little. I can't imagine being held prisoner by a computer and two websites.

What does everyone do to pass the time and not constantly check status. Please, assist me with your ideas.

Do you realize you are asking the addicts how to cure your addiction!

Its like you said the initial excetement but you know one can only watch the grass grow for so long Besides the more you think about something, the loooonger it takes to happen

[featherB 1]

I't like an addiction... I honestly check both VJ and my email atleast every half hour.

You do realise there is absolutely no point in doing this, don't you? And that it will serve no purpose but to drive you slowly insane?!

Checking the VJ forum is one thing - at least it provides distraction and useful information! - but if it's the timelines you're checking every half-hour... don't! You'll go crazy. Save the constant checking on the timelines/your case status until there's at least a glimmer of hope that something's going to be happening to your case! Keeping an eye on the timelines so you can see where CSC are up to in their processing is fine, but as you've no doubt already gathered, things are moving verrrrry slowwwwly there right now - even if you check daily, there's a very good chance you'll see no change at all!

I got very excited at the beginning of December when CSC started approving the first batch of early October filers. It's now mid-January, and they STILL haven't progressed beyond early October. We filed in late October, and I know there's no point in me checking our case status, as it's going to say exactly the same thing as it's said for over two months. I still do check it most days, but only once... I'm going to save the proper losing-my-mind insanity for that (seemingly very far-off) day when people who filed at the same time as, and after us, start to get their approvals.

Honestly, try to find anything you can to take your mind off the waiting - just tell yourself you have a good two months of NOTHING happening to get through yet, and think about anything and everything but your petition. You probably want to feel like there's something you can do towards making the whole thing go faster & more smoothly - in which case, it's a good idea to start looking at what'll be required once you get to the consulate stage, and making a start on getting all the paperwork and evidence that'll be needed for the interview, have a read of the forms, find out about getting the police clearance, etc. Just don't get too enthusiastic and get the employer/bank letter (if you're using them as evidence of financial support) too early, as those are things that'll need to be up-to-date at the time of the interview, so no point getting them too early.

The time will pass, and you'll probably find it'll go quicker than you think. I still feel like it'll probably be 'forever' until we get our NOA2 (just because there's been so little movement from CSC that it feels like they're going backwards!), but today is 74 days since our NOA1 - I remember looking at the timelines and seeing that people were getting approvals from about day 60 onwards (mostly 70 - 90, and I'm expecting 90 - 120 now because of the holiday slowdown), and thinking '60 days??? That's sooo long, 60 days will NEVER come!!'. Well, it did... shame our NOA2 didn't come at the same time, but hey!

So try to relax and (easy to say, impossible to do, I know) try not to think about it too much, or at least, try not to obsess over checking on your & other people's progress too much, at least not until you know you can reasonably expect something to happen. And meanwhile, you can learn a huge amount of information that'll be invaluable to you in the coming months just by looking around on here... read up on what happens next (once your fiancee gets to the States as well as the actual 'getting-the-visa' part) and you'll feel much more confident that things aren't going to sneak up on you. Knowing what to expect and feeling prepared is good!

Sorry for the ramble... and good luck!

[Thingee 0]

Do something productive your SO will appreciate when they get here. I'm refinishing my stairway(90 year old house, solid cherry stairs and accents that have been painted over several times by previous owners), and personalizing a stocking for next Christmas for him.

[featherB 1]

and personalizing a stocking for next Christmas for him.

... awww!!

[brnidokiegurl 1]

Life just has to go on, dwelling on this wont make it happen any sooner. I to checked and still do each day but do have to continue on with life. Each day is one day down and now i can say wow half this month is gone, soon whole month will be gone, then be getting alot closer. Right now also making him a cross stitch picture do evenings with tv when not on here. Just try continue on with normal routine.

[We_Destiny 1]

Hopefully, I can bypass the ulcer As far as interview documents I have compiled it already. I know by the time of the interview, I'll have to do it again, this initial gathering was to find out what I have, don;t have and what I will need. Ofcourse, before the interview I will update with all of my continuing relationship evidence.

Like everyone else in love and absent from their love , I have all this energy that I'm not doing a thing with it

I have signed up for a belly dancing class as well as a jewelry making class . I have always been curious about glass blowing , hey, maybe I will try that B) . I wil need to load up with lots of activities.

[misa 2]

- work

- more work

- even more work

- vj

- checking email and online status

- reading the next steps (always gotta be one step ahead)

- compiling documentation, etc.

- visits

And throw in a lot of cigarettes into the mix. No booze though. It's either cigarettes or booze and cigarettes win out every time.

[Together4ever 1]

I didn't even find VJ until 4 months after I filed the I-129F and it was on its way to the consulate. THAT was the easiest part of the journey. I just sent the form in and went about my life fat, dumb and semi-happy. Then just before the time of scheduling the interview, I found VJ and all the obsessing started and it really didn't do either one of us a bit of good. I let the whole stupid process consume me to the point when my husband finally arrived a few weeks ago, I still can't quite wrap myself around the fact that he's actually here! Take it from a dummy who let it all really get to her... balance and moderation. VJ is a very helpful venue, but too much time here can really do your head in. Good luck on your journey. I hope its an easy road for you.

[J&D_anon 0]

hey there,

well me and my fiance found VJ just before we started our journey last month. I come here daily to check the times and i do check our case daily too....BUT just once a day.....more than that would drive me crazy!!

I read here alot and panic alot too, so i guess i get pretty annyoing to my fiance. Because he always asks me: where did you hear that? VJ?? lol

So i will try to not panic anymore and just wait and see. Other people go through the whole process without VJ as help and they do it, so we can do it too and be prepared!

But no need to panic (can everybody see, how much i try to convince myself to NOT panic??...lol)

Anyways....i am lucky, that i can talk to my fiance almost all day. When i am at work, he is in bed and when i get back from work, he is at work and there he can use yahoo messenger and so we talk until i go to bed

For the weekends we want to play online games on here together, because after a while it is hard to find a new topic and so we still can pass the time together!!!

So i'd advice you to not check every half hour, because it makes the time pass by even slower AND it will drive you crazy...Once a day is pretty much enough!!! To some maybe already too much, but hey...we can't help it

I wish you the best for your journey and calm down......take a deep breath and relax....

Diana

[RIMASH 0]

"we destiny" thanks for posting this thread. I always wanted to do this as I kind of follow your foot steps too.

I used to check it million times a day - my email, uscis website & vj....but never saw any results....

this really made me crazy and when ever i called my husband, i was always so stressed out that i showed my frustration to him which is not a good thing, as we are not close to each other, and irritate him is the last thing i want to do.

So, I promised to change.

Now all i do is:

pray

work

yoga

gym

read

watch tv

talk to him on the phone/webcam

miss him

and dont worry about this stupid process

ITS GOING TO BE VERY VERY VERY VERY HARD.....but if you try it once, you will always be able to do it.

Good luck.....

[ladykelia 0]

I have a case of this obsession too.. although I do find lots of the stories on VJ to be very interesting. I hope my compulsiveness slows down too... I have plenty of stuff to keep me busy, university, yoga, boyfriend (we get to stay together during the process), and everything else, but I still come to VJ and post way too much. Our I-129f is still in the mail so theres not much to watch there... I hope I don't become obsessive with watching my application process-- I understand that it is SLOW. Blah. Anyway, I think we should join a club (oh wait, we're already in one!)

[patiently_waiting 0]

VJ has been a great help in keepinh me disctracted. There is always something new to read and you are bound to make some friends. Welcome to the club! Keep yourself busy with different activities and the time will go by faster than you think. There are times i have a hard time with the seperation, but the people here are a great support and help get me through it.