JOB WOES

[daisy16 0]

Are ya ready for my whine?

So my first real job here isn't going so well. I didn't want it in the first place, but it seemed like a good idea at the time.

I was a teacher with 13 years of experience, and I have to redo my certification before teaching here, so it'll take many months and $1000 or so. I took a part-time job doing afterschool day care for K-2 kids. I am the boss, the one in charge. I'm supposed to deal with all the BS and administrivia that goes along with caring for kids. Sort of like the principal. The money was okay I guess, not even 1/2 of what I'm used to, but it was helping me to feel more independent. Also, I had a lot of stress at work last spring, so I was worried I'd never be able to work full-time again and the 25 hours a week seemed to be a good start on that.

Well, I've been working 30 hours a week and then 1-2 hours per day unpaid, which really pisses me off. First of all I don't want to work more than 25 because of the stress. But the fact that I'm doing unpaid work at home as well is just crazy.

Not only that, but the rest of my staff can't think for themselves. I have to tell them to do everything. They can't handle a group of kids and get them to do anything. So instead of doing my job at work, I end up having to do their jobs as well. So I'm already burning out! At daycare!

I've come to the conclusion that I'm not a very good boss. especially when people are hired who can't even do the job they're hired for. If they could do their jobs I might have a chance at being decent. (I don't have hiring and firing rights, btw, MY boss gets those privileges)

So I sent a mild ultimatum to my bosses. Things need to change or I'm out. I'm devastated cause I've never quit a job before, but I can't continue doing this. I came home tonight crying yet again just because I'm in over my head. I'm doing far more than I can handle. The job is getting in the way of me preparing for my Green Card interview in a few weeks and also preparing for my teacher certification. The applications need to be sent in this month and I'm so far behind.

Try not to roast me too roughly for being unable to work full time. I think the situation has proved that like it or not, I just CAN'T. Besides, I'm also going to school and studying for my certification exams. I know I have so much to be grateful for that I shouldn't complain. However, I was already having a hard time adjusting, this just adds to the struggle I'm afraid.

[Miranda&James 8]

I had a job almost EXACTLY like yours as far as the problems go. I was in charge of a front desk at a dorm (not as serious of a job but the stress certainly was) and I did not have the power to fire (I asked my boss to fire someone, she did, and rehired them, only causing me more problems with the worker ), half of my workers were idiots, and I was definitely doing a lot of unpaid time (I got paid the same as my workers with a tiny stipend that only covered my extra hours I had to do unpaid when you worked it out!). The worst part was that I had to come in whenever someone didn't show up and the desk was open 24 hrs a day, 365 a year, so I spent many nights there and even some holidays So, my point in telling you all that is that the stress is NOT worth it. You need to leave and get yourself together and find a job that is much more caring towards your needs and feelings and where you aren't working with a bunch of dummies!

Edited March 4, 2006 by James_and_Miranda

[govols 0]

Daisy,

I'm with Miranda on this. You have to be happy at the place you spend a lot of your day! Don't beat yourself up over not enjoying the first job you have over here. You will find something that you truly like, you may just have to go through a few bad ones to find the right one. Good luck to you!

Karen

[Peggy 1]

Daisy,

I'm with Miranda on this. You have to be happy at the place you spend a lot of your day! Don't beat yourself up over not enjoying the first job you have over here. You will find something that you truly like, you may just have to go through a few bad ones to find the right one. Good luck to you!

Karen

I agree.

I know that I am going to start off with something that I really dont like to do with getting my first job here. Unless I luck out.

Just dont put yourself thru hell at this job if you dont really like it, and its causing you stress.

[ceriserose 1]

I know what you mean about the burn out...I had that after my last long term job and it was a concern when taking this one. I don't think it'll be as bad...I'm in a different place in a lot of ways now from then. (Of course, tonight I'm so exhausted I can't even see straight...LOL)

However, there's nothing wrong with finding out and accepting that it's not going to work. You know that NO job is worth your health or mental/emotional well-being. So as far as "never quitting a job", it's not a sign of anything other than that it's not a good fit for you. And there's nothing wrong with that.

Life is way too short to spend a good deal of time doing things you don't enjoy. Work isn't supposed to be all laughs, but it's got to at least be bearable.

I hope you can work this out.

[ChristinaM 0]

Oh hon, I'm sorry it's not going so well.

First things first, if you're not paid to work full-time, don't. The point needs to be made to the upper level that if they require a FT member of staff, they should hire one; not a part-timer and expect them to make up the difference for the love of it. Work doesn't work like that.

Secondly, if you're not in a position to work FT, then don't. Nobody is going to haul you over the coals for that one. AOS is a heck of a thing to deal with, you're recertifying and I know that things haven't been so easy for you. 5 hours a week, 15 hours a week, 45 hours a week. That choice is yours to make and nobody has the right to suggest that you should be doing anything different in that regard.

Finally, a suggestion. Maybe whilst you're easing back into working and you have other things going on you should look for an "administrivia" job. Office admin four mornings a week for a two-man operation. Something you can leave at the office when you come home. Don't think of it as a cop-out, think of it as being practical and working inside your limits. I don't know if that kind of job exists where you are, but it's certainly worth looking into.

Anything I can do, you know how to get hold of me...

*Hugs*

[MaryandMian 1]

Daisy sorry to hear of the tensions with your new job. Maybe you can find another job with fewer hours and still continue with your recertification. Hang in there and hugs,

Mary

[Dixie_Peach 1]

Daisy...

I am so sorry that you are haveing a difficult time of things right now... *hugs*....

I have to agree with everyone who has posted before me... you have not done anyting wrong... you have tried to do your very best... don't look at yourself as a failure... I would say that if YOUR boss isn't up to par in hiring competent workers, then that definitely makes YOUR job unbearable... Wishing you the best... let me know how it turns out... God bless ya!

Lynne

[Fandango 1,439]

Daisy, I'm sorry to hear that you're having probbos at work! But you shouldn't take it out on yourself, or come to the conclusion that you're not a good boss. I don't want what I'm going to say to be taken the wrong way, but you have not been given the full powers of a 'boss' cos you can't control who works for you.

Had you had that power, I'm sure you would make an excellent boss. But right now, you're basically babysitting poor workers who know you can't fire them. They apparantly don't fear you as every boss should be feared a little.

Also, working for free is not cool at all. Why do they expect you to do it? I don't even think that's legal!!!

Sometimes, walking out of a no-win situation is the best....you have to put yourself first.

Good luck!

[daisy16 0]

Thank you all for your kind and supportive replies. My hubby is also grateful, cause he's been saying QUIT for several weeks but I don't like to give up. I'm feeling better, no tears at least. Hubby and I spent a great day Saturday hanging out and having fun.

What I did do was send an email to my bosses on Friday night while the dispair was still fresh, telling them that I'm out if things don't change. It's fair warning and also leaves the door open for change. I know the email was not the best choice, but I knew by Monday I'd be trying to make things work again.

[Mr. Big Dog 10,747]

Thank you all for your kind and supportive replies. My hubby is also grateful, cause he's been saying QUIT for several weeks but I don't like to give up.

Why look at it in terms of giving up? Look at it in tems of being an at least one experience richer (it's just plain bad to be held responsible for someone else's decisions) and having decided to move on.

[RaspberrySwirl 20]

Daisy,

And you weren't whining, we all have times where we feel like we need to vent and this place is good as any other

I feel the same way about my job right now.

I agree with most of what the others said. Wishing you the best.

::hugs::

[w¡n9Nµ7 §£@¥€r 123]

It's plain hard being boss if the people who report into you are idiots. Sorry to hear this, but look at it this way.. this doesn't mean you're not cut out to be boss, what this does is show you one vital ingredient (good employees) that you need to be a good boss!

[almaty 19]

good point Arijit...Daisy, do not give up..all you need is one job...keep seeking and ye shall find...pastor dean