Relax

[Penny Lane 8,159]

Can a mod delete this thread? Either it's a troll thread or misguided advice. While patience is a virtue, relaxing gets old when people who filed at the same time and even after have their visas already. There are obvious problems with the service centers, CSC in particular and it's unfair to dub this a 'first world problem' when peoples lives an families are having to deal with this. There are people who have never seen their newborn children because of the delays, most of us will be apart from our loved ones for a year of our lives, how dare someone belittle the issue like that. If I live to 85, that's 1.2% of my life that I would have spent being unhappy because I coudn't be with my loved one. Can't imagine how it'd feel if there were kids in the equation.

It's trolling now to attempt to give people helpful advice on how to spend the time waiting? Why? Because he waited less than some people in this thread?

Nobody is denying the obvious problem. The OP is not the reason this process is so slow for some people. No need to treat him like the enemy when he was ATTEMPTING to be positive. Nobody is belittling any issue.

On this forum, we all have the same goals. Life gets in the way. Sometimes it isn't fair. But there's no need to attack someone because they got dealt a better hand than you did.

This isn't a competition of who has it the worst. It's SUPPOSED to be a supportive community.

[Alcatraz63 9]

Through association, as are most comparisons done.

How long did it take to receive your visa? Just out of interest.

[JohnR! 5,495]

Can a mod delete this thread? Either it's a troll thread or misguided advice. While patience is a virtue, relaxing gets old when people who filed at the same time and even after have their visas already. There are obvious problems with the service centers, CSC in particular and it's unfair to dub this a 'first world problem' when peoples lives an families are having to deal with this. There are people who have never seen their newborn children because of the delays, most of us will be apart from our loved ones for a year of our lives, how dare someone belittle the issue like that. If I live to 85, that's 1.2% of my life that I would have spent being unhappy because I coudn't be with my loved one. Can't imagine how it'd feel if there were kids in the equation.

Alas it is so. We all have/had the option to move to another country to be with our spouses, yet we chose to have them take the role of immigrants.

I am yet to see anyone here confess to their absolute exhaustion with the USCIS and declare him/herself an emigrant.

We make choices and they have consequences.

How long did it take to receive your visa? Just out of interest.

I never had one. We only applied for my spouse's visa when there was a change in paradigm and she could no longer make do with non-resident status. It took us almost two years from filing to her arrival in the US.

Edited April 12, 2013 by Gegel

[Penny Lane 8,159]

I apologize for not taking OP's advice to heart. What have I been doing this whole time? Why was I not dedicating my time to improving my relationship, or studying, or keeping myself busy. If it were not for OP's eye-opening advice, I would have just sat here for another 6 months sitting on the couch, staring at the wall, letting my life pass by.

Point proven.

The OP isn't the reason the process is slow. No need to treat him like he is. He attempted to give positive advice to people who don't want to hear it. His mistake, but how is this attitude you have working out for you? Are these sarcastic responses making your process go any faster? Or is it just more fun to sit and type them out at people who really are just attempting to help.

VJ has gone from a supportive community to a community where it's only acceptable to be miserable during the waiting period and anyone who attempts to provide anything positive will have their timelines judged and their advice will only be worthy IF they waited longer than the people they're attempting to help.

[Alcatraz63 9]

Alas it is so. We all have/had the option to move to another country to be with our spouses, yet we chose to have them take the role of immigrants.

I am yet to see anyone here confess to their absolute exhaustion with the USCIS and declare him/herself an emigrant.

We make choices and they have consequences.

I never had one.

Since you are being smart, I shall leave it at that.

[Bayareaguy 156]

Yeah, as if there is any comparison between, being 6000 miles away, every day and night, for months, waiting for paperwork to be shuffled, and living with your significant other and family, waiting for paperwork to be shuffled.

OH OK, YOU"RE RIGHT...I SHOULD LOOK AT HOW GOOD I HAVE IT NOT BEING WITH MY FIANCEE, WHEN IT IS GOING TO BE SOOOOO MUCH WORSE FILING FOR ROC AND AOS LIVING WITH MY LOVED ONE...I SHUDDER TO THINK OF THAT TIME AND HOW HORRIBLE IT IS GOING TO BE!

[JohnR! 5,495]

Yeah, as if there is any comparison between, being 6000 miles away, every day and night, for months, waiting for paperwork to be shuffled, and living with your significant other and family, waiting for paperwork to be shuffled.

OH OK, YOU"RE RIGHT...I SHOULD LOOK AT HOW GOOD I HAVE IT NOT BEING WITH MY FIANCEE, WHEN IT IS GOING TO BE SOOOOO MUCH WORSE FILING FOR ROC AND AOS LIVING WITH MY LOVED ONE...I SHUDDER TO THINK OF THAT TIME AND HOW HORRIBLE IT IS GOING TO BE!

If we are to indulge in hyperbole, consider that about 50% of marriages end up in divorce.

[Sooooon 11]

It's trolling now to attempt to give people helpful advice on how to spend the time waiting? Why? Because he waited less than some people in this thread?

Nobody is denying the obvious problem. The OP is not the reason this process is so slow for some people. No need to treat him like the enemy when he was ATTEMPTING to be positive. Nobody is belittling any issue.

On this forum, we all have the same goals. Life gets in the way. Sometimes it isn't fair. But there's no need to attack someone because they got dealt a better hand than you did.

This isn't a competition of who has it the worst. It's SUPPOSED to be a supportive community.

I was implying the OP was misguided. We were all zen and patient at the 6-8 month mark, what will be will be etc. It's not like we hadn't considered or practiced what he'd posted.

I assure you it didn't. Your comment was just stupid.

But I will not bicker any longer with you. I am sorry you are such an angry person. In a few months when this is all over, you will be complaining about homesickness and the fact that your spouse doesn't do the dishes. First world problems.

This guy I was implying to be a troll and belittling the issue. Better check our first world privilege, love is a privilege, having 2 arms and complaining about wasting a year of our lives to immigration on a forum privilege, lets all take a moment to reflect on the greater issues in the world the make our arguing on a forum seem minor. Oh that's right, you're calling out these first world problems, doing so from the comfort of your homes with internet access. Why aren't you out saving the world instead of posting here on this first world issue? You don't care so stop acting like you're above it all.

[Penny Lane 8,159]

I was implying the OP was misguided. We were all zen and patient at the 6-8 month mark, what will be will be etc. It's not like we hadn't considered or practiced what he'd posted.

Misguided, perhaps. But with seemingly good intentions.

You don't know how many people I've seen go 6-8 months and then when they get their NOA2, have absolutely no idea what to do with themselves. They don't know the next step, they have no idea what they need to do. All of a sudden, after the NOA2, they're in a panic because it's moving too fast and they are not prepared. Who sends what paperwork? How do we pack/ship her stuff? My house isn't ready! I've seen it all.

So in general, advising people to be prepared for the upcoming months when this part is over and the actual moving and life begins isn't necessarily bad advice. Not useful for EVERYONE, but not bad advice.

I don't think the OP needs to be attacked or called a troll simply because he offered that advice and he happens to have a shorter timeline than some people around here. He isn't the enemy.

[Ban Hammer 12,848]

closed for review.

[Ban Hammer 12,848]

13 posts removed for tos violations or for quoting those posts. one member thread banned and additional admin action taken.

do not make personal insults towards other members. further violations will receive a thread ban at the least.

[Hannah777 8]

OP - I filed 5 weeks after you and I don't have my NOA2 yet - let alone be anywhere close to having my interview. You were lucky - most of the people who filed a month after you are not so lucky.

I can't paint bedrooms as I sold my flat in anticipation of moving to the US. I now live in a single bedroom in a flat I share with 3 other people. I have always had my own home and now I have to share a bathroom, toilet and kitchen with 3 other people. We din't have a garden, so no gardening for me. I just live for the times when I can get into the US and spend time with my fiance.

I knew and accepted in would be a long ride but this is one hell of a longer ride than I was expecting!

I'm with you lol! Sold my house, quit my career, thought I'd be in the USA already but that was ignorance on my part. I didn't know the process then. Now I'm starting the long wait. I just try to take on as much work as I can so that I don't have time to think about how much it sucks living in limbo.

[Fight for Love 98]

i agree!!! perhaps enjoy being single until the final days lol jk

[GandD 5,966]

how much it sucks living in limbo.

Very true. Hey I'll sign up for a new cell phone..... can't. Maybe a new apartment..... can't.

[Bayareaguy 156]