My Fiancee Has a Serious Health Issue

[notmuch88tosay 21]

I was married in China then filed the CR-1 4 years ago when there was no electronic filing and it took all of 9 months to have the visa in hand. As soon as I got back from my trip getting married I researched coverage for my wife on our benefit plans as a "life event aka married" and was told the second she was here she would be covered. With that said I will stress what others have said. It takes a long time and effort to go through the immigration process and is horribly stressful even when you both are physically and mentally well. If you think you can get through with the added worries (when you did your internet search about liver problems with limited information and panicked immediately, think of that exact moment and that stress will be multiplied)

The most important thing is finding out facts and not letting worry and imagination run away. I have to be blunt.. You say you care deeply for her but define that you don't want to have to pay an arm or a leg for treatments. I guess I have to ask.. Does money really matter when it comes to health? I mean is that even worth considering for the person you want to marry to be well? Money is only money health is the only thing that matters.

I really think positive thoughts your way please please take care of her and find out what is going on. You are in the place to be for medical treatment. Good luck and we all are with you hoping the best!

Hi Dan & Juan,

Thanks for your reply and for the info.

Yes, I am prepared to deal with the time and stress involved.

As for me saying 'I don't want to pay an arm and a leg for medical treatments', what meant is I might not be able to afford it. What if the hospital in the U.S. tells me it will cost $45,000 for the first treatment and $27,000 for the second treatment and $2,900 each month for the next 12 months after that? I do not have this extra money.

Thanks again,

notmuch88tosay

[notmuch88tosay 21]

The other day, on a different question, the OP was calling his fiancee a crazy lady, and was looking to possibly get engaged to another Chinese lady before his remaining two weeks in China were done. He wanted to save money on more trips to China with his new prospect, since he thought he was done with this one. Sounds like a troller. See: http://www.visajourney.com/forums/topic/396725-my-fiancee-just-told-me-she-cannot-marry-me/

Hey Love's JAA,

There are people like Darnell, RyanH and others who, after they've gotten married, want to see others get married and sincerely try to help them do so.

And then there are people like you who, after you've been married, tries your best to discourage others, give bad advice and secretly sabotage the relationship and marriage efforts of others, while trying to appear as being sincere in trying to try to help.

Sounds like a troller. See: http://www.visajourney.com/forums/topic/396725-my-fiancee-just-told-me-she-cannot-marry-me/

notmuch88tosay

[notmuch88tosay 21]

Hello,

I spoke with my fiancee, she does not think it is Hepatitis B and neither do I after speaking with her.

I researched it online and her symptoms could indicate any of the following health issues or others:

Arginase Deficiency, Carnitine Deficiency Syndrome, Carnitine Palmitoyltransferase, Glutaricaciduria-I, or Glutaricaciduria-II, Medium-Chain-Acyl-CoA, Urea Cycle Disorders

The hospital here is closed on the weekend, so we will have to try to get more tests after the weekend.

notmuch88tosay

Edited November 3, 2012 by notmuch88tosay

[Bumbero 131]

Stop researching. If I said I had fatigue, nausea, vomitting and a cough, it could be a serious of nasty things OR a simple stomach flu bug. She THINKS it's not Hepatitis?

Seriously, stop and wait for a diagnosis. You are going to drive yourself crazy.

[notmuch88tosay 21]

Stop researching. If I said I had fatigue, nausea, vomitting and a cough, it could be a serious of nasty things OR a simple stomach flu bug. She THINKS it's not Hepatitis?

Seriously, stop and wait for a diagnosis. You are going to drive yourself crazy.

:bonk: :bonk: :bonk: :bonk: :bonk: :bonk:

[Boiler 46,860]

I need to find the clip from the Big Bang Theory.

[Love's JAA 100]

Hey Love's JAA,

There are people like Darnell, RyanH and others who, after they've gotten married, want to see others get married and sincerely try to help them do so.

And then there are people like you who, after you've been married, tries your best to discourage others, give bad advice and secretly sabotage the relationship and marriage efforts of others, while trying to appear as being sincere in trying to try to help.

Sounds like a troller. See: http://www.visajourney.com/forums/topic/396725-my-fiancee-just-told-me-she-cannot-marry-me/

notmuch88tosay

My Fiancee Just Told Me She Cannot Marry Me ... After I arrived in China to marry her

#1 notmuch88tosay

Senior Member

Group:Members

Joined:17-January 11

Filed for:K-1 Visa

Filing Location:California Service Center

Country: China

Timeline Photos

Posted 26 October 2012 - 04:00 PM

Hello,

Yes you read that right, my fiancee just told me she cannot marry me... after I arrived in China to marry her as we agreed. And after I have been patiently waiting for her for over two years.

She says her father will not give his permission for our marriage, so she cannot marry me. A fantasy story, in my opinion.

So now I know I proposed to one of the insane ones. I feel like I'm watching myself in a Korean Soap Opera while in China.

I am in alot of pain but I would be in alot worse shape if I hadn't been chatting with several women online recently who have expressed interest.

I started talking with women online while in China after my fiancee started playing games and saying strange things (like she needs to get her father's permission, after he already gave it to us two years ago).

I'll still be in China for another two weeks.

So I have a couple of questions now:

1) My fiancee (ex-fiancee) recently let our K1 Fiancee Visa expire before saying we can pursue the CR-1 route, so if I find another lady I want to marry while in China now and she agrees, do I have a choice of the K1 Fiancee Visa route, or is my only option a CR-1 Marriage Visa? In other words, isn't there a period of time that needs to go by after filing one K1 Fiancee Visa before being able to file another one?

2) Is there a certain period of time that needs to pass before I would be able to file for a CR-1 Visa, considering the K1 Visa recently expired?

3) I just spent $7,000 for this trip to China. To allow myself the fewest trips to China as possible for marriage to a Chinese lady, what would be my best plan? In other words, do I try to meet with the parents of the lady I choose now? Should I propose now with a ring, or during my next trip, etc?

On the one hand I don't want to waste more time, I've already wasted over two years on this crazy lady. I also cannot afford to waste more money at this time. But on the other hand I want to make sure I don't rush things and choose another crazy lady; so I need some time to get to know the lady, and her family situation, her motivation, and so on.

notmuch88tosay

0

I'm all for seeing a guy marry the woman he LOVES AND RESPECTS!!! It seems women are just like commodities to you. One minute your ex is just some crazy lady that you are all to in a hurry to dump and replace- yeah you broadcast that out here on VJ, but now you find out she is very sick. Now you are going to stick with her? Until when? For how long? You say I just come here to sabotage relationships? Why don't you read what you write and see who is doing the sabotaging. You don't need help.

[Harpa Timsah 13,259]

Sounds like another mcat.

Her "disease" sounds like an eating disorder.

[notmuch88tosay 21]

My Fiancee Just Told Me She Cannot Marry Me ... After I arrived in China to marry her

#1 notmuch88tosay

Senior Member

Group:Members

Joined:17-January 11

Filed for:K-1 Visa

Filing Location:California Service Center

Country: China

I'm all for seeing a guy marry the woman he LOVES AND RESPECTS!!! It seems women are just like commodities to you. One minute your ex is just some crazy lady that you are all to in a hurry to dump and replace- yeah you broadcast that out here on VJ, but now you find out she is very sick. Now you are going to stick with her? Until when? For how long? You say I just come here to sabotage relationships? Why don't you read what you write and see who is doing the sabotaging. You don't need help.

While I am in China your advice to me was to forget a Chinese woman and try to get a Philipino wife. That is the most idiotic worse advice I have ever heard in my life. Then you try to embarress and humiliate me into giving up on everything. Not an effort to sabotage my efforts?

You're not one of the 'Have's' who want all the 'Have-Not's' to remain 'Have-Not's' so you can feel better about your miserable life?

I am in China now and I have a young lady with a potentially life-threatening disease to worry about.

I don't have the time or desire to deal with your hate-filled little ego.

So why don't you go away? Or is that something you are not capable of doing?

Or if you prefer, you can argue with yourself here all you want.

notmuch88tosay

[Love's JAA 100]

While I am in China your advice to me was to forget a Chinese woman and try to get a Philipino wife. That is the most idiotic worse advice I have ever heard in my life. Then you try to embarress and humiliate me into giving up on everything. Not an effort to sabotage my efforts?

You're not one of the 'Have's' who want all the 'Have-Not's' to remain 'Have-Not's' so you can feel better about your miserable life?

I am in China now and I have a young lady with a potentially life-threatening disease to worry about.

I don't have the time or desire to deal with your hate-filled little ego.

So why don't you go away? Or is that something you are not capable of doing?

Or if you prefer, you can argue with yourself here all you want.

notmuch88tosay

No I didn't tell you to get a Filipina wife! What I told you, is that you might look farther afield. I told you what my experience was, not what you should specifically do. I'm not sure, despite your misinterpretation, just why would that would be the "worst and most idiotic advice"? Are you making a disparaging comment about Filipinas now? You'll make a whole lot of friends on that one!

From your posts, you're not a "have-not", you're a "have-a-lot", as you mentioned all of the Chinese girls you are in contact with. The ones, that you are ready to call up as soon as this one seems to fall through.

Sorry, I don't need to go away just because you wish that I would disappear.

Am not sure how I can "embarrass and humiliate you into giving up on everything". Not my intent. Just seriously puzzled by your inconsistency - so cold and callous toward your fiancee one day, and now you are so concerned today.

Oh, you say you are there worrying about her, yet you are so darn quick to get back on VJ to give me an earful. Why is that?

I won't feel so bad whatever name you call me, since even the girl you plan to marry, the supposed love of your life you were referring to as "insane" and "crazy" just a week ago. Oh yeah, and all ready to dump and replace in the same trip! Just like a commodity. Then you come here and want help on how to best make that possible for you.

That's what really bothers me.

Hopefully I won't see a another comment from you because you should be with your ailing fiancee, not here writing another snappy rep-lie.

[notmuch88tosay 21]

No I didn't tell you to get a Filipina wife! What I told you, is that you might look farther afield. I told you what my experience was, not what you should specifically do. I'm not sure, despite your misinterpretation, just why would that would be the "worst and most idiotic advice"? Are you making a disparaging comment about Filipinas now? You'll make a whole lot of friends on that one!

From your posts, you're not a "have-not", you're a "have-a-lot", as you mentioned all of the Chinese girls you are in contact with. The ones, that you are ready to call up as soon as this one seems to fall through.

Sorry, I don't need to go away just because you wish that I would disappear.

Am not sure how I can "embarrass and humiliate you into giving up on everything". Not my intent. Just seriously puzzled by your inconsistency - so cold and callous toward your fiancee one day, and now you are so concerned today.

Oh, you say you are there worrying about her, yet you are so darn quick to get back on VJ to give me an earful. Why is that?

I won't feel so bad whatever name you call me, since even the girl you plan to marry, the supposed love of your life you were referring to as "insane" and "crazy" just a week ago. Oh yeah, and all ready to dump and replace in the same trip! Just like a commodity. Then you come here and want help on how to best make that possible for you.

That's what really bothers me.

Hopefully I won't see a another comment from you because you should be with your ailing fiancee, not here writing another snappy rep-lie.

Hey Love's JAA,

You're in luck, I've got a couple of minutes to reply.

First of all, with my lack of time to respond, I worded a part of my earlier reply incorrectly and I'm sure you know what I meant to say.

I have nothing against Filipina women, in fact I think the world of them and all Asian women. And any guy who has an Asian wife is one lucky dude in my book.

When I said, "... forget a Chinese woman", I meant to say, "... forget about Chinese women".

What I meant is, here I am in China surrounded with thousands of gorgeous Chinese women and my fiancee is also here. I was struggling with my fiancee, so I would either get her to come around, or meet with some of the thousands of gorgeous Chinese women that I am surrounded by here in China... and start a new relationship.

By your advice was for me to forget about the women in China, while I am in China, and go on a dating site or something and try to get a Filipina wife. I am IN CHINA. I am SURROUNDED BY GORGEOUS CHINESE WOMEN everywhere I go here.

Your advice WAS the worst advice I've ever heard based on the time and place and context involved.

You try to make me appear as an insensitive scam artist who just keeps jumping from one lady to another. But the fact is that I have been patiently waiting for my fiancee for almost three years now.

First she would not get her birth certificate and Chinese Passport so our K1 Fiancee Visa expired. Then she tells me to come to China to marry her, but then tells me her father might not approve of our marriage when I arrived (after I met with them 2 years ago and received their blessings). Then she told me her father said 'no'. Then she told me we could get married. And there was alot of things said and done that happened before, during and after all this.

You can't seem to comprehend that I could react and say things I don't mean after my heart has been ripped out of my chest, can you?

All you can do is try to confuse the facts with your hypocracy. So I'll let you in on the real facts now...

The fact is that your hate-filled ego obviously just can't get your mind off me or anything I've ever said since I was born. You just keep having to stalk me on this site and look for things I've said that you can make me guilty for.

And the fact is that you go trolling through every post I've ever made here looking to find something to hit me with.

And the fact is that I made a post here asking for help and you couldn't wait to slam me and try to label me a troll and an insensitive scammer right away as soon as you saw it.

And the fact is that you reveal your hatred by showing no empathy whatsoever for my situation in dealing with a fragile young lady with a potentially life-threatening health issue. Only now you mention her after your obsession with me and everything I've ever said in the past.

And the fact is that I'm leaving on a High Speed Rail tomorrow to another city in China to be with my fiancee once again, so once again, I don't have the time or desire to deal with your hate-filled hypocracy.

notmuch88tosay

Edited November 4, 2012 by notmuch88tosay

[MuDelphi 159]

All you can do is try to confuse the facts with your hypocracy. So I'll let you in on the real facts now...

what was hypocritical about anything that Love's JAA posted?

[notmuch88tosay 21]

what was hypocritical about anything that Love's JAA posted?

Ah yes, Professor MuDelphi, what a surprise I would hear from you; another one on this forum who stalks me on this site.

You are the one who kept telling me I wasn't ready for marriage (while I am in China trying to get a Chinese wife).

Your bad advice was also intended to sabotage my relationship efforts, while I am in China, and once again, you are one of those guys who can't stop following me around everywhere I go on this site.

What a surprise that you would stand up for 'Love's JAA'... you both have the same goal.

I said 'hypocrite' because he tried to label me a troll when he is the one who trolls through this site looking for everything I've ever said to try to use against me.

I have an Express Train to catch in a couple of hours, no time or desire to talk to you either.

notmuch88tosay

[Penguin_ie 5,999]

*** stay on topic and constructive or do not post. If you see a post that is offensive/ trolling, report it rather than accusing eachother in a public forum ****

[unlockingsky 94]

you should get a second opinion.. take her to another doctor to do a independent diagnosis. corrupt medical practice can also be a issue when doctors are trying to scam for more money.