Child Custody In Egypt (Slightly Off Topic)

[FormerlyKnownAs 17]

In the words of a wise friend:

"Don't Feed the Animals!"

Some of you will get it, some of you won't. As a mother, I have a great many feelings about the situation, but will refrain from making comment as I don't see how it would be constructive.

[Lisamarie 79]

Never mind, I have nothing to say....just please take a step back and look at all of this objectively, and read the words in bold a few times........

Well again, I didn't mean anything insensitive toward the mother by asking about custody matters. It just kills you when you are talking to someone you love about his kids... Then his voice cracks, and he starts breaking down, indignantly SOBBING for like a half-hour straight. So bad he can barely get a word out, because he misses them-- and has to work far away from them. And he tells you he feels like he "doesn't deserve to be their father". Tells you how bad he needs you right now. You feel protective, like you just wanna reach through the screen and hug him. Or go to battle with everything that hurts him, no matter who is right or wrong...

I did the original post right after that happened. So if it sounded bias, that's probably why. But after calming down, I know its best for his oldest boy to be with us (since his mother passed away), and his youngest to stay with his mother.

Its not all about what Khalid wants, I'm also kinda tired of being without the person I love, and just working, working, and there never being anything meaningful to come home to. I want to be married to the man I love and have a family. I don't have anything tying me to the USA, I work a job I'm not very attached to. Pay rent month-to-month. Live alone. Rarely see my relatives anyway. If I'm not gonna raise a family here, then...

And since Khalid's ex would never live where he had to work (she wants to stay near her mother), he never would have had the chance to be more than a "summer dad" to his youngest son Youssef, whether he stayed married to her or not. They were never in love. But at least if Khalid and I are together, there would be love. We could raise his oldest son Adam, and we would all live in the same house together. We are best friends, and have most things in common. I AM willing to live wherever he works, because I am not really tied down here. As for meeting... We are kind of beyond the point of condemning each other over little personality quirks. Its not so simple as to decide we don't like each others mannerisms in person, and blow each other off. I am really all he has, and he is all I have.

Edited June 26, 2011 by Lisamarie

[Mithra 1,185]

I'm glad that the OP has come to the conclusion that perhaps it wouldn't be in the best interest of the younger child that he be taken from his mother. I am, however, concerned for the OP that she feels that a man behind a computer screen (that she has never actually spent any RL time with) is all she has in life. This speaks volumes. I can now see why she would want to do everything to please "all she has". I've been a member of this forum for several years and it never ceases to surprise me how sad certain cases are. Just when I think I've seen the most bizarre, most naive, most gullible, most tragic and most sad...I see more.

Edited June 26, 2011 by Mithra

[nurse1967 287]

Dang, you take a day off of the MENA forum and you miss all the good cat fights.

[ErikaAndHamit 73]

A word of advice here for anyone who doesn't know any better: You can never ask a question in any MENA thread as all the people who are bored here or have their own issues will come here and make it a madhouse and make you out to be the worst person in the world and then go off topic and start fights of their own like some zoo. I usually read and run because I get so disgusted, but I will say something this time and for anyone sane out there in MENA land: please don't ask for any advice in this forum or give any of the crazy ones on here any personal info-they will tear you apart unfairly while thinking themselves perfect!

Just because she asked a naive question does not mean that her relationship is doomed just because her fiance wants custody of his child (right or wrong)! Please. Get a life. There are a few of you who are sane on here, but I have been sadly disappointed reading the MENA forum for years now and it's too bad because I am married to a Muslim too and will never find a sisterhood here, that's for sure. I don't understand why people are so mean and nasty here.

Edited June 26, 2011 by ErikaAndHamit

[nurse1967 287]

Wow, you are expecting triplet boys?? How cool is that!!! Congratulations!!

[Muh and me 18]

A word of advice here for anyone who doesn't know any better: You can never ask a question in any MENA thread as all the people who are bored here or have their own issues will come here and make it a madhouse and make you out to be the worst person in the world and then go off topic and start fights of their own like some zoo. I usually read and run because I get so disgusted, but I will say something this time and for anyone sane out there in MENA land: please don't ask for any advice in this forum or give any of the crazy ones on here any personal info-they will tear you apart unfairly while thinking themselves perfect!

Just because she asked a naive question does not mean that her relationship is doomed just because her fiance wants custody of his child (right or wrong)! Please. Get a life. There are a few of you who are sane on here, but I have been sadly disappointed reading the MENA forum for years now and it's too bad because I am married to a Muslim too and will never find a sisterhood here, that's for sure. I don't understand why people are so mean and nasty here.

Erika, many of us have found a sisterhood and bonded here. Its too bad that a thread of sorts has to be taken off track but there are some people and I won't say who it is, does that. I'm sorry you feel that way, but those of us that have formed a sisterhood have become like family and very close. And I agree I dont get either why some people ave to be mean and nasty.

[kristen_maroc 126]

This place can be pretty intimidating for newcomers... but... I guess if I had seen lots of people hurt over the years, I can understand where some of the bitterness and/or skepticism comes from. A lot of you ladies have made me think, but I'm certainly still going ahead with the k1 process. I don't know if I count as a butterfly rainbow noob or not, but in many ways, I don't really care as long as I have realistic expectations for my fiance's and my personal journey.

I try to read with an open mind, take antecdata for what it is: antecdata... get the helpful information that some people certainly have... and try to ignore the drama. It's funny, because when I have told real-life people about this place, I always feel like I need to tell them to have thick skin on the MENA board and take everything with a grain (or ns-kilo) of salt. Yet I'm still here. Funny.

[~ameriptian~ 54]

Erika, many of us have found a sisterhood and bonded here. Its too bad that a thread of sorts has to be taken off track but there are some people and I won't say who it is, does that. I'm sorry you feel that way, but those of us that have formed a sisterhood have become like family and very close. And I agree I dont get either why some people ave to be mean and nasty.

I couldn't agree more! I have made many good friends from this forum.. Most ladies here are generally nice and offer sincere help.. Even though there are particular people that turn every possible civilized discussion into a train wreck even when they are not addressed in the discussion..

I generally refrain from participating in a discussion going downhill and has the same member(s) everybody know(s)... People who know me from this forum, do know well I have never been anything but nice to everyone in my stay here... And, I personally think in order to keep this forum civil and hate-free some moderation action must be taking towards the member(s) that fuels hate and misinformation in almost every thread...

[Mithra 1,185]

If this forum teaches anyone anything - it's to really think about what kinds of personal information to share with the public. It's not really a good idea to divulge every thought, idea, personal conversation, private argument, etc. We all have personal lives and sometimes our lives get crazy or messy or whatever. However, not all of us feel the need to come to a public message board to talk about it in detail. If you're going to share all of this personal stuff you have to be prepared to face whatever reaction others may have whether good or bad. I don't share too much on these boards but it doesn't mean my life is perfect or that I don't have my own personal dramas to deal with from time to time. I just choose not to invite strangers to pick apart my life. I know that the OP and others are new at this and don't yet have their filter. Hopefully they can learn to either toughen up or be more careful with whom they share their personal business with. Also, ask yourself - would my SO, fiance, husband want all these ppl to know what we talk about, argue about, deal with or any other vulnerability? Probably not. I know I'd be pissed if my husband was on a public board discussing our personal business with strangers.

[~ameriptian~ 54]

A word of advice here for anyone who doesn't know any better: You can never ask a question in any MENA thread as all the people who are bored here or have their own issues will come here and make it a madhouse and make you out to be the worst person in the world and then go off topic and start fights of their own like some zoo. I usually read and run because I get so disgusted, but I will say something this time and for anyone sane out there in MENA land: please don't ask for any advice in this forum or give any of the crazy ones on here any personal info-they will tear you apart unfairly while thinking themselves perfect!

Just because she asked a naive question does not mean that her relationship is doomed just because her fiance wants custody of his child (right or wrong)! Please. Get a life. There are a few of you who are sane on here, but I have been sadly disappointed reading the MENA forum for years now and it's too bad because I am married to a Muslim too and will never find a sisterhood here, that's for sure. I don't understand why people are so mean and nasty here.

Prayers going your way for the rest of your pregnancy!!

How exciting must it to be that you are expecting triplets!!

[Ban Hammer 12,829]

i think this thread has run it's course. it's now closed.