My father-in-law hates the U.S.- how to deal??

[Lisa and Kano 2]

I am engaged to a wonderful, loving, open-minded Chilean man. Unfortunately, his Dad isn't quite as open-minded. The guy absolutely hates the United States and, well, given the U.S.' involvement in the coup d'etat in Chile and the suffering that the subsequent dictatorship caused his family, I do kind of understand him. But I wish that my father-in-law could separate the politics from the culture, the people, etc, or that he could at least see a few of the positive things about the States. He's told me that the U.S. is full of selfish, materialistic Zionists who only care about money. He's also said many other hurtful things when he has never studied politics (or anything else), doesn't speak English, and has never been to the U.S.

The worst part is that he wants to raise my son to hate the U.S., too. I've caught him saying things like, "You won't be a greedy and inhumane as those American ***holes" to my son, and it really hurts me. Every year, I spend months at a time living next door to my this guy. I don't want to fight with my fiance's family, but I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE. I want my son to love both of his countries! Help!

[SMOKE 1,426]

its your son. its you that is choosing to allow hatred of the US to be taught to your son by his grandfather. time to be mom & put an end to it.

[Zero Sum 305]

+1 to SMOKE. Abuelo should but out of raising a grandson with hatred on his mind.

It might be hard, but you may want to remind your father in law that for all the CIA did in Chile, it was the Chilean military and Chilean aristocrats that set up shop and did 99% of the damage to Chile during and after the overthrow of Allende.

Scapegoating the US as the only instigator is a bit irresponsible and as someone that suffered through that time, he should know what is what.

And he should perhaps be more exposed to American political thought that is critical of abusive foreign policy, and how its much less now compared to ages past. That might help him see that not all Americans are greedy imperialist pigs.

[natty bumppo 297]

this man you are engaged to might just want to reconsider who he really is and what his expects of you and your child.

does your fiancee support you along with your desire to raise your child with an open mind? or does your fiancee support his father?

your fiancee just might want to chose where his support is and take appropriate action.

(hint: silence on your fiancees part is approval of his father's viewpoint)

there is another interesting thought. if you handle the situation alone, you do know who wears the pants in the household. right?

Edited March 21, 2011 by natty bumppo

[mawilson 2,133]

He's told me that the U.S. is full of selfish, materialistic Zionists who only care about money.

Tell him you're one of them and if he doesn't lay off your son, you'll sic Goldman Sachs on his аss.

Edited March 21, 2011 by mawilson

[Lisa and Kano 2]

Tell him you're one of them and if he doesn't lay off your son, you'll sic Goldman Sachs on his аss.

That's pretty funny.

[Amby 490]

Do you live in Chile?

[trillium13 84]

this man you are engaged to might just want to reconsider who he really is and what his expects of you and your child.

does your fiancee support you along with your desire to raise your child with an open mind? or does your fiancee support his father?

your fiancee just might want to chose where his support is and take appropriate action.

(hint: silence on your fiancees part is approval of his father's viewpoint)

there is another interesting thought. if you handle the situation alone, you do know who wears the pants in the household. right?

Came here to say this, pretty much. Your fiance is going to have to be 100% behind you in putting a stop to this. Does he know how you feel?

[Lisa and Kano 2]

Came here to say this, pretty much. Your fiance is going to have to be 100% behind you in putting a stop to this. Does he know how you feel?

Thanks to all for the replies. It's good to hear others' opinions. My fiance is definitely on my side and has defended me in front of his dad before, which resulted in his dad only saying this stuff when my fiance is not around. Oh, well- hopefully our boy will have enough positive influences to make up his own mind. Lil One will probably care more about surfing and rocking out than talking about politics, which is FINE BY ME. Sports and music bring people together; politics seems to tear 'em apart.

If I get too fed up, I'll just do what mawilson says...

[Fandango 1,439]

pretty ballsy to do that to your son, especially if your fiance is not the bio-dad

Edited March 22, 2011 by Lisa C

[Saddle Bronc 124]

How about asking your son whether he wants visits with grandpa?

If he does, let him (son) pay his own way there--and if he doesn't,

[Brother Hesekiel 2,236]

I am engaged to a wonderful, loving, open-minded Chilean man. Unfortunately, his Dad isn't quite as open-minded. The guy absolutely hates the United States and, well, given the U.S.' involvement in the coup d'etat in Chile and the suffering that the subsequent dictatorship caused his family, I do kind of understand him.

Me too. Right now pretty much everyone hates the United States.

But I wish that my father-in-law could separate the politics from the culture, the people, etc, or that he could at least see a few of the positive things about the States.

I wish we would have publically funded elections, get corporate money out of politics, and stop attacking other countries. Ain't gonna happen anytime soon.

He's told me that the U.S. is full of selfish, materialistic Zionists who only care about money.

That's correct. Rent the documentary "The Inside Job" and learn how intermingled Goldman-Sachs and its soldiers are with US politics. Those are the people who control the Government.

The worst part is that he wants to raise my son to hate the U.S., too. I've caught him saying things like, "You won't be a greedy and inhumane as those American ***holes" to my son, and it really hurts me. Every year, I spend months at a time living next door to my this guy. I don't want to fight with my fiance's family, but I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE. I want my son to love both of his countries! Help!

It's your son and you can put your foot down and tell your father-in-law to either abide by your rules of conduct or not have any contact with his grandson at all.

[^_^ 5,021]

It's your son and you can put your foot down and tell your father-in-law to either abide by your rules of conduct or not have any contact with his grandson at all.

Yes, you determine TOS and you can thread ban his a s s .