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~Johnny~

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Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Ukraine
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Add me to those that say don't talk about previous relationships! Even if she asks! Just tell her you don't want to dwell on the past, but focus on the present. I know you are an honest guy with nothing to hide so you have no problem talking about the facts of your past. I was the same way. Trust me though, nothing good can come of it. Talking about such things is just a turn off. Talking about being worried about scams I think can also be a turn off. So I would say it's best to keep any worries you may have to yourself.

I read your story a long time back. Sorry you had such a bad experience! I was happy to see you found your way over to the RUB forum and hope you will soon be another "satisfied customer" lol. They truly are some of the best women in the world, but like any other group of women, there are some snakes, so you gotta be careful too. My best advice is just be realistic in what you look for.

Hope you have a fantastic trip and finally meet the woman of your dreams!

P.S. For the record, I went to meet my wife after about 2 months of correspondence and phone conversations. I, also, just wanted to meet her to see if we had the same chemistry in real life that we had on the phone...I didn't want either of us to waste our time. Anyway, just wanted to meet...had no intentions of marriage or anything like that. Short story...I was engaged a week later and married a month after that. Best relationship I have ever been in....like 100x better than I ever imagined. Hope the same happens for you, bud!

Wife's visa journey:

03/19/07: Initial mailing of I-129F.

07/07/11: U.S. Citizenship approved and Oath Ceremony!

MIL's visa journey:

07/26/11: Initial mailing of I-130.

05/22/12: Interview passed!

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Filed: Other Country: Ukraine
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Don't forget to bring a single red rose all the way from your city, with you on the plane, to give to her at the first sight of her.

Do not buy in the airport but bring it from home. Even battle-worn, you WILL earn big big points.

She WILL know how to repay you !!!!! Here's hoping your heart can take it......your life will definately change if you pursue this woman.

Okkk So I'll look like an idiot for 17 hours from New Orleans to Kiev... but after that I'll be golden... :thumbs:

I read your story a long time back. Sorry you had such a bad experience! I was happy to see you found your way over to the RUB forum and hope you will soon be another "satisfied customer" lol. They truly are some of the best women in the world, but like any other group of women, there are some snakes, so you gotta be careful too. My best advice is just be realistic in what you look for.

Thanks! I'm trying to keep this realistic as possible (looking much deeper at inner traits that last a lifetime and not so much at "supermodel" traits that are only good for the first few hours). It's getting much easier as time goes by, it'll be a year in May since the issue with my ex. I did go to Peru last November to meet an old friend that I knew before my K1-thing. And we spent the first few days with her constantly asking questions about that issue and quizzing me on how/why I didn't see it coming. I realized it was a ghost that would never go away with her and I didn't want to keep explaining why things happened. So, we enjoyed our time together and I told her it will never be like before and we should move on.

Now I wish I had scheduled my trip for next week. I'm a scientist in the Army Corps of Engineers and we just had a New Orleans office meeting about a possible govt shutdown. March 4 is coming fast, it would also affect lots of VJ'rs in the upper boards with USCIS shutting most non-essential things down. And here's a good one...IRS says, in case of govt shutdown, staff that take in payments and tax forms will be reporting to work (essential)...staff that settles refunds will be sent home (non-essential). :bonk:

~Johnny~

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Filed: AOS (apr) Country: Kenya
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Look like an idiot?????

What I can recall is that here in the States, me and my flower never once yielded any reaction...from either man or woman.

Over in Kiev, while wandering about waiting fir my bags on the carousel, I think I caught "the look" from some young ladies (locals for sure) and very much noticed some guys giving me the "you go Tiger" look.

Alla was truly smitten with the gesture..you know when you read about they want a more traditional type of relationship? This is an example.

You be the man and man will they be the woman!

Phil (Lockport, near Chicago) and Alla (Lobnya, near Moscow)

As of Dec 7, 2009, now Zero miles apart (literally)!

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Filed: Other Country: Ukraine
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Look like an idiot?????

What I can recall is that here in the States, me and my flower never once yielded any reaction...from either man or woman.

Interesting you mention that. I can recall last year, myself walking around LAX for several hours with a dozen roses and not even getting notice from anyone, male or female. Is romance dead in our society?

~Johnny~

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The biggest take away I got so far is "the man should be the man" and "looking into the future not the past." I think that's good advice especially since for many years in our culture, we're programmed to NOT be the man.

If you're not the man in this relationship you're going to get scammed again.

Put your foot down. Call the shots. Tell her the way it's going to work. She'll love you for it.

Русский форум член.

Ensure your beneficiary makes and brings with them to the States a copy of the DS-3025 (vaccination form)

If the government is going to force me to exercise my "right" to health care, then they better start requiring people to exercise their Right to Bear Arms. - "Where's my public option rifle?"

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Filed: Other Country: Ukraine
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Be prepared for some different customs while courting too. Men are supposed to chase, women run.

Does this include chasing her around the apartment? :lol: I seem to remember a James Bond movie (From Russia with Love) where he flat out rapes the Russian actress by today's standards. He slaps her face, throws her on the bed, and she's saying No No No...he continues on until she says Ohhh James.... :no: I think she was a Russian double agent spy.

~Johnny~

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Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Ukraine
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Look like an idiot?????

What I can recall is that here in the States, me and my flower never once yielded any reaction...from either man or woman.

Over in Kiev, while wandering about waiting fir my bags on the carousel, I think I caught "the look" from some young ladies (locals for sure) and very much noticed some guys giving me the "you go Tiger" look.

Alla was truly smitten with the gesture..you know when you read about they want a more traditional type of relationship? This is an example.

You be the man and man will they be the woman!

Once when I visited in May, I had a layover in Amsterdam and brought her a huge bunch of the famous Netherlands tulips. Tulips today...two lips tonight! :P

It rocks for them to be able to tell their friends they have a "Rose from America" or "Tulips from Holland" Never underestimate the importance of such things.

VERMONT! I Reject Your Reality...and Substitute My Own!

Gary And Alla

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Filed: AOS (apr) Country: Kenya
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Does this include chasing her around the apartment? :lol: I seem to remember a James Bond movie (From Russia with Love) where he flat out rapes the Russian actress by today's standards. He slaps her face, throws her on the bed, and she's saying No No No...he continues on until she says Ohhh James.... :no: I think she was a Russian double agent spy.

In today's FSU-womens world, she chases you around and spills hot wax all over you. Just ask Slim.

Phil (Lockport, near Chicago) and Alla (Lobnya, near Moscow)

As of Dec 7, 2009, now Zero miles apart (literally)!

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Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Ukraine
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I'm with the rest of these guys - don't tell her squat.

Just let her know how rich you are, how big your sausage is, and how much you want to make her the happiest woman in the world. That's all she really wants to hear anyway.

Oh, and whatever you do, don't flirt with the translator.

:lol: I was waiting for Slim to respond.

You do not have to tell her you are rich, she already knows that. You FLEW there from America. You are rich.

She needs to find your sausage for herself. :P Very important though.

VERMONT! I Reject Your Reality...and Substitute My Own!

Gary And Alla

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Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Ukraine
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Well thanks for the good suggestions....not sure if I'm smarter now or worse. :whistle:

I think maybe I was looking too far into this with my previous K1-scam-divorce issue, especially since I'm just meeting this new girl in person in about a month. Longer term plans, who knows?? In the past 3 months, I've only been asked once about being divorced and I said yes, divorced 2 times. And nothing else was ever asked. Honestly, I was planning a trip for April/May but just couldn't pass up R/T air from New Orleans to Kiev for $587. The only issue was the trip had to be in March. So I bumped vacation plans up a bit. I got an apartment, based on old posts here in RUB forum, at Kievrent and they are sending a car to the airport. The agency offered apartments but their cost was about double for what appears to be less quality digs. The agency also said they could send a car to the airport with an English speaking driver, but $75, I said no thanks...and got it through Kievrent for $30. I have a nice 2 room flat for $89/night near the Opera house and next to some popular Pub called Eric's. At the moment I'm planning to start off the visit with the one girl, but if I sense no magic after our first meet then, I'll be honest with her and I'll go into backup plans.

When I first scheduled the trip, I told her it would be nice to meet the night when I arrive as I'll be too excited to go to my apartment and rest. I get in Kiev at 5pm. She wanted me to rest and meet the next day for breakfast and spend the whole day together. I said, well when I get in I can take a shower and then just visit Eric's Pub for a little while....she instantly did a reversal and said..."I can't leave you alone there, I'll meet you when you arrive and we'll go have dinner." Maybe she's worried about me meeting other girls? :unsure:

Well, thanks for the comments. You have no idea how much help some of this is. It means that as far as dating goes, it's a re-thinking process on how to conduct yourself compared to western ways.

I PROMISE you she is worried about other girls. :lol: When there, notice how women walk with their men. They hang on like they will drown if they let go. Go to a pub or sidewalk cafe and one will be at your table before your drink arrives, if another comes (another WILL come even with one already sitting there) unless it is the friend of the first one, she will snap at her and claim you for herself and tell her to "get lost"! :lol:

Alla doesn't even like me to walk to the corner kiosk for juice. :lol:

Yes, they are WOMEN and you are the MAN. They do not expect to have to tell you to do "man things". Basically anything heavy, dirty, smelly, involving tools or machines, making the money (they will spend it, you make it) handling the finances (they want to know about them and then leave it to you)

Remember, men are not supposed to get upset at women. They are just silly women, you are supposed to be above that. There should be nothing they can do to upset you. Just humor them and comfort them.

VERMONT! I Reject Your Reality...and Substitute My Own!

Gary And Alla

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Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Ukraine
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She WILL know how to repay you !!!!! Here's hoping your heart can take it......your life will definately change if you pursue this woman.

I had a massive heart attack and quad bypass surgery 2 years after meeting Alla, one year after being married. He is not joking about your heart.

I am better than ever and have much better, um, circulation than I had previously. :P

VERMONT! I Reject Your Reality...and Substitute My Own!

Gary And Alla

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Does this include chasing her around the apartment? :lol: I seem to remember a James Bond movie (From Russia with Love) where he flat out rapes the Russian actress by today's standards. He slaps her face, throws her on the bed, and she's saying No No No...he continues on until she says Ohhh James.... :no: I think she was a Russian double agent spy.

Assume they are all spies. :lol:

They all went to the "Sparrow School" Google it. :lol:

VERMONT! I Reject Your Reality...and Substitute My Own!

Gary And Alla

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Does this include chasing her around the apartment? :lol: I seem to remember a James Bond movie (From Russia with Love) where he flat out rapes the Russian actress by today's standards. He slaps her face, throws her on the bed, and she's saying No No No...he continues on until she says Ohhh James.... :no: I think she was a Russian double agent spy.

According to some women on VJ, you're never supposed to do this.

But, then you'll get a PM that says "I wish I had a man that would do that to me."

In today's FSU-womens world, she chases you around and spills hot wax all over you. Just ask Slim.

True story.

Although, it's still the mans job to do the chasing. Sometimes the woman will "offer herself up" and be caught more quickly than other times.

I PROMISE you she is worried about other girls.

I can't agree with that. My wife wastes no time worrying about other women. She knows she is best of the best at all times. Just ask her.

Русский форум член.

Ensure your beneficiary makes and brings with them to the States a copy of the DS-3025 (vaccination form)

If the government is going to force me to exercise my "right" to health care, then they better start requiring people to exercise their Right to Bear Arms. - "Where's my public option rifle?"

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Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Ukraine
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I can't agree with that. My wife wastes no time worrying about other women. She knows she is best of the best at all times. Just ask her.

But my wife knows I'M the best of the best. :P She worries because she knows I am such a good catch.

(she will deny it if you ask her. But actions speak louder than words. :lol: )

VERMONT! I Reject Your Reality...and Substitute My Own!

Gary And Alla

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I'm with the rest of these guys - don't tell her squat.

Just let her know how rich you are, how big your sausage is, and how much you want to make her the happiest woman in the world. That's all she really wants to hear anyway.

Oh, and whatever you do, don't flirt with the translator.

Don't forget to tell her she is the queen and in charge of everything too :P

Maybe she's worried about me meeting other girls? :unsure:

Yes, and with reason.

Is romance dead in our society?

You know it is.

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Travelers - not tourists

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