Bad news on interview for child

[martinbr 1]

They took a xray of my wife's child and found a spot on her lung. Now she has to undergo medicine for 6 months before they can see her for interview. My wife is very upset obviously about this because of her daughter might be having a medical condition. I know they are from a rural area where TB could be running rancid, so I am suspecting that maybe the child picked something up from one of her friends or in the school. It's funny that the mother came out with a clean record and the child has it though.

Now they have to go all the way back to Bacolod City 600 miles away on a boat and wait for 6 months. But there must be a reason for it. I still am scrambiling with the work situtation here and living in the S.F. bay area is even worse. Here the unemployment rate is 12.5%!

Maybe things will improve for me in the next 6 months with more work and then feeling comfortable about bringing them here.

The reality of it is that I am starting to lose hope about the whole thing. Mabye this is for a reason and she should be staying in her own country. Maybe god is putting so many obstacles in my way to get my attention that it might not be the right move for me. Don't get me wrong, I love her as much as the first day that we met, but I have to be realistic about things. It might be for her best interest to just stay in her own country and just letting her go in my life. I don't want to bring them over to even worse conditions that she had in her own homeland. Sad day for me....

martinbr

Edited June 28, 2010 by martinbr

[Anh map 2,098]

Sorry to hear the news. Unfortunately TB is alive and well out there in the world.

My brothers in law (in Vietnam) both came down with TB. Please be sure that your wife's daughter completes the entire course of medicine. If not, there is a chance that she could develop a drug resistant strain of TB. The treatment for that can be looooong and difficult.

Best of luck to you and the extended family. Keep the faith and don't let this speed bump interfere with your relationship.

[trailmix 77]

I'm sorry to hear that, it must be tough for you.

I'm going to tell you what I think here, since you posted this i'm assuming you want opinions - if not, please disregard.

I don't know your whole story, but i'm guessing you are unemployed or under-employed, looking for a job, so times are tough and that's getting you down.

I sincerely doubt that God is trying to tell you something here. If you were in a more positive state of mind you would probably be saying something along the lines of "God has put these challenges in our way so that we can prove how strong our relationship is" - you get my drift.

It's appalling that you would be considering throwing away the relationship you have with this woman and your child. Are these two people not your family? Right now your wife has found out that they won't be travelling to the U.S. right away, to their Husband and Father, that your child has to undergo treatment for a medical condition and they have to travel 'home' 600 miles. Imagine how they are feeling.

Time to pull your socks up.

[Fudpukker 18]

Regroup yourself and take it one day at a time. I know its easier said then done but it is what it is.....

[Jewel-8 21]

Now they have to go all the way back to Bacolod City 600 miles away on a boat and wait for 6 months. But there must be a reason for it. I still am scrambiling with the work situtation here and living in the S.F. bay area is even worse. Here the unemployment rate is 12.5%!

I don't know if this well help at all. But here is a dose of optimism. Time are tough. If you are unemployed or underemployed please keep sending out resumes or working to get more business. We are finding that things are getting more positive on my husbands job search. A few places he sent his resume to a month or two ago are just now calling him to arrange phone interviews. Today he took a 2 week assignment with a temp agency. I'm feeling a bit better about our situation already. I hope yours starts to approve also.

Maybe a 6 month delay would actually help your fiance/wife and her child get ready for the move. They could celebrate one more Christmas with their loved ones over there and then start the new year with YOU!!

[Tahoma 2,291]

They took a xray of my wife's child and found a spot on her lung. Now she has to undergo medicine for 6 months before they can see her for interview. My wife is very upset obviously about this because of her daughter might be having a medical condition.

Now they have to go all the way back to Bacolod City 600 miles away on a boat and wait for 6 months.

martinbr...quit your bellyaching and listen up...something doesn't add up here.

First of all, St Lukes "finds" spots on x-rays all the time. It's almost always nothing, so there's very little need to worry.

Secondly, I have never heard of St. Lukes jumping from a spot on an x-ray to a six-month TB treatment. That's not my understanding of the way the process works. My understanding is that a three-day sputum test and a two-month TB culture are the standard operating procedure when a spot is found on the x-ray. If the culture comes back positive, the person has TB. If the person has TB, they must undergo a minimum of six months of treatment where they are required to take their daily medicine at St. Lukes. If the two-month TB culture comes back negative, St. Lukes will set another interview appointment at that time.

[Deb+Steve 13]

These are not obstacles ... it's life. It's easy to want to throw in the towel (been there many times in my head) but when do you stop yourself and realise that there are things in life worth fighting for. Like family. Don't jump to conclusions. I know of one couple who had a TB scare and it turned out to be OK. Don't lose hope and definitely don't project your current feelings onto your wife. I can only begin to imagine what it must be like for her at this time.

If your employment situation is not the best at the moment then maybe that is the blessing for you ... not a sign to end it all. Don't make this a self-fulfilling prophecy. We can only speculate, so here's hoping that your daughter is well.

Will say some Ohms for all of you ...