K1 after 90 no marriage

[SunDrop 59]

I'm confused. If you are fine as a couple but he's not happy in NYC, then you're undoing about a year's worth of effort and relationship strain and then add at least the same again if you decide he should come back by not just getting married by a JoP and waiting to AOS (however without adjusting, he can't work...)

Why stay in NYC? There is so much to the US, beyond big cities and dense populations. I honestly don't think there isn't something for everyone. In fact, it's a part of American history - the way immigrants would set out into the unknown, and stop when they got somewhere that reminded them of home! Take a day trip out to Ellis Island and look at the migration trends of different countries, and where they ended up. It's a really interesting exhibit. I realise that you probably have to work to support the 2 of you, but could he approach it as a project?

Get online and research different states, the scenery, the culture, the climate. Take a couple of long week-ends if you can, and visit a couple of different ones when airlines are offering cheap fares and explore America. Find where you like and plan to move. If you treat life like the adventure it is, you get so much more out of it. And if this guy and you genuinely feel that you are 'for life' then who better to go on that adventure with?

I do know how difficult it seems though. When my fiance and I first met and realised this was the real deal, we planned for him to move to England. He spent nearly 6 months here on a tourist visa and discovered he hated living here. The climate, the food, the distance from all things familiar. He's far more of a homebod than I am but it took him a long time to tell me just how unhappy he had been. It nearly broke us up until I said, "No biggie, we'll go there." It's not the logical way of doing things for us but it's the necessary way if we are going to be happy as individuals and therefore successful as a couple.

Good luck, whatever you decide to do!

Edited March 15, 2010 by SunDrop

[Minya's wife 24]

The house and other property might not really mean all that much - he owns them right now, too, and he is in the US, where he came with the intent to get married.

You will probably have to rely on a Swedish job, or something along the lines of that. The fact that your fiance has you in the US will work 'against' him every time he gets to a POE.

Entry on the VWP, or any visa for that matter is always granted at the discretion of the CBP official at the POE. Having had and used a K-1 visa may be looked upon as 'intent to emigrate' and may be cause for further scrutiny the next time your man comes to visit. To offset that, he would have to show strong ties to Sweden...owning house and acreage is not enough, IMO. (The idea is that he could manage the property and house from overseas if need be). But adding to that a job, with set vacation time verified by the employer (a letter from the boss stating the dates of the vacation) would help offset the perceived intent to emigrate.

[CDNgirl 0]

Hi everyone,

I tried to look for this info. but I can't seem to find an answer for my question so, that why I need you guys to help me. My fiance came here with K1 visa and we decided not to get marry at this time. He will be leaving next week because his visa will be expiring. So, here is my question, when can he come back to United States again? Can he come back right away or there are waiting period? He is from Sweden so he doesnt need to apply for tourist visa or anything like that.

Thank you,

Hi ThaiSweed102,

Just came across your post and thought that I should comment. I am currently going through a second submission of a K-1 visa with the same person. Be patient

My fiance and I were in a similar situation. We were approved for a K-1 in 2007 and within the 90 day period we decided not to get married, things were just really stressful at the time. I returned back home in Sept 07 within 90 days unmarried. We loved each other very much but because of family reasons and the timing of everything we decided it was best not to go forward at the time. I went back for a visit in Dec 07 to spend more time with my fiance. My plan originally was to stay a month but ended up staying for 6 months. Im from Canada so I didnt need to apply for a visitor visa. At the time when I returned to Canada I did not have a job and had been staying with family so I didnt have a mortgage on rent in my name. Crossing the boarder was painless, although I admit that I was very nervous.

Since then I have made numerous trips to the US with no problem, we reapplied for the K-1 visa and have an interview next week. All in all I can look back as well and say a lot of money was spent and time has lapsed but its definitely worth it. My fiance and I joke all the time and say , who would but themselves through this tedious process twice. Although our journey is not over I think sometimes its easy to forget how challenging being away from home is sometimes. So I can definitely relate to your fiance.

Sorry about the long post hope it helps

[sachinky 464]

If you don't get married within the 90 days, your fiance needs to leave the U.S.

He can use his VWP privileges to re-enter the U.S. but be advised that admission to the U.S. is at the sole discretion of the CBP at POE. He will need to demonstrate overwhelming ties to Sweden that would compel him to return at the end of his stay.

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

Hi everyone,

I tried to look for this info. but I can't seem to find an answer for my question so, that why I need you guys to help me. My fiance came here with K1 visa and we decided not to get marry at this time. He will be leaving next week because his visa will be expiring. So, here is my question, when can he come back to United States again? Can he come back right away or there are waiting period? He is from Sweden so he doesnt need to apply for tourist visa or anything like that.

Thank you,

He is from a visa waiver program country, so he can come back to visit anytime. He cannot come back, get married and apply for a change of status on a VWP entry. If you want to do that, he will have to apply for a new K-1. You can also get married after the 90 days expires, but will have to file an I-130 along with your I-485.

[raymaga 25]

If you two both think that there is a future for you, you could always get married before the 90 days ends, and then apply for AOS/AP and then your husband could return to Sweden (after getting AP) or try to find another part of the U.S. to live in. That way, you will not be pressured into solving this situation in the next week and then having to reapply for a new K-1 visa down the line.

I realize this means that if you two couldn't work things out, you would have to divorce before you could move on with your lives.

Good luck.

[Old Dominion 26]

I take it that things in NYC are so bad, the two of you would take such a risk. On the other hand, if you're a city gal and he's a farmboy, which one of you is willing to adopt a different lifestyle?

[FrancElsie 6]

The K-1 Visa is good for only 90 days. You have only two options: 1) Marry within that time period or 2) Don't marry and he must return to his country. Since he is from Sweden and he can come to the USA without a visitors visa, he can come anytime. BUT, don't think you can get married on one of these visits and proceed from that point forward. It does not work that way. (You'd have to go through the complete petitioning process another time.) IF you do marry on a visit...you will be creating a whole host of other problems. So...the choice is between you and your fiance' about what to do.

In reading the other posts about your situation, I agree with the person who said to look for the immigration patterns of other people from Sweden. In the USA, there is something for everyone. IF he cannot find another town similar to where he lives in Sweden...he has not looked very far. Try Wisconsin for example...I think a lot of Swedes have immigrated there!! Ya Lars!!!!

Best Wishes and Good Luck,

Franc

[Seb928s 2]

How about get married if you guys love each other. File for AOS then think about where you guys want to live. If you choose Sweden it's really nice over there but he will have a harder time to travel to the States if he doesn't get his citzenship. Otherwise if you guys find a place that you both like in the States he can stay legeally here.

Let me tell you our plan for right now is. To get married over here get the AOS stay until she can get her citzenship and if we want to choose moving back to Europe then we will but we will both have duel citzenship as I'm from Poland and so she is too. However I can't move there right now as I have a really good job here but both of our plans include Europe for retirement so sooner or later we may end up there, but that is just our plan and it really depends on her if she likes the States a lot to stay here for life. My parents and brother live in England and the rest of our families are in Poland.

[ThaiSweed102 0]

Hi ThaiSweed102,

Just came across your post and thought that I should comment. I am currently going through a second submission of a K-1 visa with the same person. Be patient

My fiance and I were in a similar situation. We were approved for a K-1 in 2007 and within the 90 day period we decided not to get married, things were just really stressful at the time. I returned back home in Sept 07 within 90 days unmarried. We loved each other very much but because of family reasons and the timing of everything we decided it was best not to go forward at the time. I went back for a visit in Dec 07 to spend more time with my fiance. My plan originally was to stay a month but ended up staying for 6 months. Im from Canada so I didnt need to apply for a visitor visa. At the time when I returned to Canada I did not have a job and had been staying with family so I didnt have a mortgage on rent in my name. Crossing the boarder was painless, although I admit that I was very nervous.

Since then I have made numerous trips to the US with no problem, we reapplied for the K-1 visa and have an interview next week. All in all I can look back as well and say a lot of money was spent and time has lapsed but its definitely worth it. My fiance and I joke all the time and say , who would but themselves through this tedious process twice. Although our journey is not over I think sometimes its easy to forget how challenging being away from home is sometimes. So I can definitely relate to your fiance.

Sorry about the long post hope it helps

Thank you for responding, When we first apply for the K1 visa he agree to come here and live in US. While we were waiting for the visa he found a good job that makes a lot of money, he start to have doubt about moving here. He start to tell me maybe I should move there and just stay at his house without having to worrie about rent. He start to bragging how better health care system there and I agree but that wasnt the plan you know. I have already spent all my time and money try to get the damn visa and I didnt want to waste it, so I ask him to come anyway and hope he likes the city. Plus I started a business here with a friend and is growing I cant just drop everything and move to Sweden and be a house wife ;o)

Finaly K1 got approved, he quite his job came to NYC. I have never live with him more than 6 weeks, so this was kinda like a test in away. I did learn a lot about him and myself. The first 2 months I was ready to just send him home ) we would fight about small little things like why American people are so rude, or why American have to use Fahrenheit instead of celsius, stupid stuff like that. But after 2 months things start to get better. Now, I just let the man complain and when he is tired he will stop haha... So,We only have few more days to go before the visa expire I just dont think I have to time to do go get Social Security Number, get marry, AOS...etc. ( If we had 6 months instead of 3 months I probably wont be in this situation.

Anyway, if anyone in the same situation I would like to hear from you! ) Sorry, english is not my first language but I try.

[ThaiSweed102 0]

How about get married if you guys love each other. File for AOS then think about where you guys want to live. If you choose Sweden it's really nice over there but he will have a harder time to travel to the States if he doesn't get his citzenship. Otherwise if you guys find a place that you both like in the States he can stay legeally here.

Let me tell you our plan for right now is. To get married over here get the AOS stay until she can get her citzenship and if we want to choose moving back to Europe then we will but we will both have duel citzenship as I'm from Poland and so she is too. However I can't move there right now as I have a really good job here but both of our plans include Europe for retirement so sooner or later we may end up there, but that is just our plan and it really depends on her if she likes the States a lot to stay here for life. My parents and brother live in England and the rest of our families are in Poland.

That was my plan also, bring him here and stay here until he get his citizenship and than we can go anywhere. But he is too stubborn too listen to me. When we first met of course he was like ok whatever you want, I will move for you because I love you hahhaa ... now! forget it I am laughing now because I dont want to put stress on myself anymore. Good luck with you guys! What along process for nothing ;o(

Thank you for responding, When we first apply for the K1 visa he agree to come here and live in US. While we were waiting for the visa he found a good job that makes a lot of money, he start to have doubt about moving here. He start to tell me maybe I should move there and just stay at his house without having to worrie about rent. He start to bragging how better health care system there and I agree but that wasnt the plan you know. I have already spent all my time and money try to get the damn visa and I didnt want to waste it, so I ask him to come anyway and hope he likes the city. Plus I started a business here with a friend and is growing I cant just drop everything and move to Sweden and be a house wife ;o)

Finaly K1 got approved, he quite his job came to NYC. I have never live with him more than 6 weeks, so this was kinda like a test in away. I did learn a lot about him and myself. The first 2 months I was ready to just send him home ) we would fight about small little things like why American people are so rude, or why American have to use Fahrenheit instead of celsius, stupid stuff like that. But after 2 months things start to get better. Now, I just let the man complain and when he is tired he will stop haha... So,We only have few more days to go before the visa expire I just dont think I have to time to do go get Social Security Number, get marry, AOS...etc. ( If we had 6 months instead of 3 months I probably wont be in this situation.

Anyway, if anyone in the same situation I would like to hear from you! ) Sorry, english is not my first language but I try.

sorry about all those faces, suppose to be happy face lol..

[ThaiSweed102 0]

The K-1 Visa is good for only 90 days. You have only two options: 1) Marry within that time period or 2) Don't marry and he must return to his country. Since he is from Sweden and he can come to the USA without a visitors visa, he can come anytime. BUT, don't think you can get married on one of these visits and proceed from that point forward. It does not work that way. (You'd have to go through the complete petitioning process another time.) IF you do marry on a visit...you will be creating a whole host of other problems. So...the choice is between you and your fiance' about what to do.

In reading the other posts about your situation, I agree with the person who said to look for the immigration patterns of other people from Sweden. In the USA, there is something for everyone. IF he cannot find another town similar to where he lives in Sweden...he has not looked very far. Try Wisconsin for example...I think a lot of Swedes have immigrated there!! Ya Lars!!!!

Best Wishes and Good Luck,

Franc

My mom live in Vermont and we love Vermont alot because of the mountains and lakes. But I cant afford to live there my job is in NYC. I am a sport photographer, it would be hard for me to find some work up there to support both of us. Thank you for all those info. they are really do help and I do write them all down too hehe..

[ThaiSweed102 0]

I take it that things in NYC are so bad, the two of you would take such a risk. On the other hand, if you're a city gal and he's a farmboy, which one of you is willing to adopt a different lifestyle?

his house is on the farm is really not a house is more like a cabin with 2 rooms. Is like going back in time about 100 years haha, we have to build fire to cook and to warm up the house. That cabin need so much work, is nice to stay there for a year or so but we need to upgrade it. We both need to work and earn money. If I move there I cant work, I would have to go to school learn swedish. I figure he can move here work with me, make money so we can fix up the cabin and maybe move there later on, but I dont want to force him.

[psiprez 3]

I don't think you should rush into getting married.

Not just for the sake of being able to avoid possible POE problems should he try to visit the US on VWP. Remember, you could always go there to visit, or meet up in a third country.

Every relationship travels its own path, as everyone on this site can attest to. If your relationship is meant to be, you will need to find a compromise. I like the idea of looking outside of "the big city" for an area you both would be comfortable with.

It all depends what you are willing to sacrifice for love, I suppose.

[sachinky 464]

FYI: The K-1 visa is so that you can enter the U.S. to marry your USC petitioner. The 90 days is given so that you can plan the wedding, it is not meant to be a "test drive" -- no matter how many claim that it can be used for that too. That is why you sign the intent to marry form.

All these "issues" should be sorted out before applying for the visa, IMO.

Now of course I understand things happen and if you don't think getting married is the right thing for you to do now, you should certainly wait and weigh your options. I wish you all the luck in resolving this situation.