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Mexico abandons marriage vows seen as sexist

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Associated Press

MEXICO CITY - For 147 years, marriage vows in Mexico portrayed women as delicate, weak and potentially annoying. These days, judges across Mexico are switching to versions that stress equality and mutual support, reflecting the growing power of women in a country still struggling with macho attitudes.

"As a father, I wouldn't want a judge to tell to my daughter that she was the weakest part of a human being and that she is subject to her husband's rule," said Salvador Mendoza, a civil court judge in Mexico City who stopped reading the old vows in 2001.

The old vows, a 537-word ode to marriage, were considered open-minded and ahead of their time when they were penned 147 years ago by Melchor Ocampo, a Mexican lawyer, scientist and liberal politician.

They were meant to replace religious vows at a time when Mexican liberals were stripping away the Roman Catholic Church's control over much of the country's political, social and economic life.

Conservative foes summarily executed Ocampo by firing squad for promoting the separation of church and state, but kept the amended vows in the new civil marriage law.

They dictate that a husband should treat his wife with "generous benevolence that the strong should give to the weak" and that a wife should "avoid awakening the most brusque, irritable and hard part of (her husband's) character."

Vianey Lozano, a Mexico City government employee who tied the knot three years ago in Guanajuato, said the language reflects a machismo that Mexico has left behind.

"We're not in those times anymore, and my girlfriends see it more as a joke when they hear it," she said.

Teresa Ulloa is president of Defensoras Populares, a women's rights organization that challenged the old vows.

"Even though the Mexican constitution says we are equal, the vows put the woman in a very disadvantaged position, where the man can make it her obligation to reproduce, take care of the home," she said.

The vows had already fallen out of favor with many couples before activists in March persuaded the lower house of Mexico's Congress to adopt a resolution urging judges to skip the Ocampo wording.

Mendoza said that during his three years as a judge, no couple had asked him to read the old vows.

While some of Mexico's 31 states stick to Ocampo's vows, others, including Guanajuato and Veracruz, have held contests to seek public input in writing modern alternatives.

In the northern state of Nuevo Leon, for example, judges tell the bride and groom that while men and women are "different biologically and psychologically, both possess integrity, dignity, strength and intellectual capacity. And neither should consider themselves superior than the other."

Nuevo Leon's vows say that both spouses can work and should share the housework and child-raising.

Outside Mendoza's courtroom, the couples seemed preoccupied with their own impending nuptials, rather than the language of vows.

Adrian Rubio, 29, and Maria Lozano, 28, laughed when shown the old vows, which they had never even heard of.

"My parents may have used it, but we wouldn't. Things have changed so much, and I don't see her role that way," Rubio said.

Lozano and Rubio said they planned to write their own vows for their second, religious ceremony in December.

Fernando Ramirez, 39, said he wanted a union based on equality.

"I can't imagine having this read to us," Ramirez said.

In a 20-minute ceremony wedding him to 26-year-old Anabel Martinez, Mendoza spoke of the "importance of a marriage where the couple walks next to each other, always equal, and remembering that in Mexico there is no difference by gender and that women and men have the same rights, obligations and opportunities."

The days were gone when housekeeping was solely a woman's responsibility, he said, and provoked laughter in the packed room by adding: "So make him wash the dishes."

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This ought to be interesting...I'm having my civil wedding in Mexico in a couple weeks...I don't really care what they say though...if I'm weak, so be it... :dance:


Don't let the sunshine spoil your rain...just stand up and COMPLAIN!

-Oscar the Grouch

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machismo sucks

:yes: I got pretty lucky with Javier, although being in Mexico, his sisters and mom spoil him to death. The boy does not wash or iron a single garment.


Don't let the sunshine spoil your rain...just stand up and COMPLAIN!

-Oscar the Grouch

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marriage vows in Mexico portrayed women as delicate, weak and potentially annoying.

Potentially?!! :unsure:

ROFLMAO :lol:


K-1 Timeline

11-29-05: Mailed I-129F Petition to CSC

12-06-05: NOA1

03-02-06: NOA2

03-23-06: Interview Date May 16

05-17-06: K-1 Visa Issued

05-20-06: Arrived at POE, Honolulu

07-17-06: Married

AOS Timeline

08-14-06: Mailed I-485 to Chicago

08-24-06: NOA for I-485

09-08-06: Biometrics Appointment

09-25-06: I-485 transferred to CSC

09-28-06: I-485 received at CSC

10-18-06: AOS Approved

10-21-06: Approval notice mailed

10-23-06: Received "Welcome Letter"

10-27-06: Received 2 yr Green Card

I-751 Timeline

07-21-08: Mailed I-751 to VSC

07-25-08: NOA for I-751

08-27-08: Biometrics Appointment

02-25-09: I-751 transferred to CSC

04-17-09: I-751 Approved

06-22-09: Received 10 yr Green Card

N-400 Timeline

07-20-09: Mailed N-400 to Lewisville, TX

07-23-09: NOA for N-400

08-14-09: Biometrics Appointment

09-08-09: Interview Date Oct 07

10-30-09: Oath Ceremony

11-20-09: Received Passport!!!

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just another reason to be an illegal


Peace to All creatures great and small............................................

But when we turn to the Hebrew literature, we do not find such jokes about the donkey. Rather the animal is known for its strength and its loyalty to its master (Genesis 49:14; Numbers 22:30).

Peppi_drinking_beer.jpg

my burro, bosco ..enjoying a beer in almaty

http://www.visajourney.com/forums/index.ph...st&id=10835

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marriage vows in Mexico portrayed women as delicate, weak and potentially annoying.

Potentially?!! :unsure:

ROFLMAO :lol:

:lol::lol:

asi es hermano roberto! :lol:

Daniel

:energetic:


Ana (Mexico) ------ Daniel (California)(me)

---------------------------------------------

Sept. 11, 2004: Got married (civil), in Mexico :D

July 23, 2005: Church wedding

===============================

K3(I-129F):

Oct. 28, 2004: Mailed I-129F.

~USPS, First-Class, Certified Mail, Rtn Recpt ($5.80)

Nov. 3, 2004: NOA1!!!!

Nov. 5, 2004: Check Cashed!!

zzzz deep hibernationn zzzz

May 12, 2005 NOA2!!!! #######!!! huh???

off to NVC.

May 26, 2005: NVC approves I129F.

CR1(I-130):

Oct. 6, 2004: Mailed I-130.

~USPS, First-Class, Certified Mail, Rtn Recpt ($5.80)

Oct. 8, 2004: I-130 Delivered to CSC in Laguna Niguel.

~Per USPS website's tracking tool.

Oct. 12, 2004 BCIS-CSC Signs for I-130 packet.

Oct. 21, 2004 Check cashed!

Oct. 25, 2004 NOA1 (I-130) Go CSC!!

Jan. 05, 2005 Approved!!!! Off to NVC!!!!

===============================

NVC:

Jan. 05, 2005 ---> in route from CSC

Jan. 12, 2005 Case entered system

Jan. 29, 2005 Received I-864 Bill

Jan. 31, 2005 Sent Payment to St. Louis(I864)

Feb. 01, 2005 Wife received DS3032(Choice of Agent)

Feb. 05, 2005 Payment Received in St. Louis(I864)

Feb. 08, 2005 Sent DS3032 to Portsmouth NH

Feb. 12, 2005 DS3032 Received by NVC

Mar. 04, 2005 Received IV Bill

Mar. 04, 2005 Sent IV Bill Payment

Mar. 08, 2005 Received I864

Mar. 19, 2005 Sent I864

Mar. 21, 2005 I864 Received my NVC

Apr. 18, 2005 Received DS230

Apr. 19, 2005 Sent DS230

Apr. 20, 2005 DS230 received by NVC (signed by S Merfeld)

Apr. 22, 2005 DS230 entered NVC system

Apr. 27, 2005 CASE COMPLETE

May 10, 2005 CASE SENT TO JUAREZ

Off to Cd. Juarez! :D

calls to NVC: 6

===============================

CIUDAD JUAREZ, American Consulate:

Apr. 27, 2005 case completed at NVC.

May 10, 2005 in route to Juarez.

May 25, 2005 Case at consulate.

===============================

-- Legal Disclaimer:What I say is only a reflection of what I did, going to do, or may do; it may also reflect what I have read others did, are going to do, or may do. What you do or may do is what you do or may do. You do so or may do so strictly out of your on voilition; or follow what a lawyer advised you to do, or may do. Having said that: have a nice day!

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marriage vows in Mexico portrayed women as delicate, weak and potentially annoying.

Potentially?!! :unsure:

ROFLMAO :lol:

:lol::lol:

asi es hermano roberto! :lol:

Daniel

:energetic:

:lol: :lol:

mi hermano daniel!!! hola! Que tal y que paso? :D


K-1 Timeline

11-29-05: Mailed I-129F Petition to CSC

12-06-05: NOA1

03-02-06: NOA2

03-23-06: Interview Date May 16

05-17-06: K-1 Visa Issued

05-20-06: Arrived at POE, Honolulu

07-17-06: Married

AOS Timeline

08-14-06: Mailed I-485 to Chicago

08-24-06: NOA for I-485

09-08-06: Biometrics Appointment

09-25-06: I-485 transferred to CSC

09-28-06: I-485 received at CSC

10-18-06: AOS Approved

10-21-06: Approval notice mailed

10-23-06: Received "Welcome Letter"

10-27-06: Received 2 yr Green Card

I-751 Timeline

07-21-08: Mailed I-751 to VSC

07-25-08: NOA for I-751

08-27-08: Biometrics Appointment

02-25-09: I-751 transferred to CSC

04-17-09: I-751 Approved

06-22-09: Received 10 yr Green Card

N-400 Timeline

07-20-09: Mailed N-400 to Lewisville, TX

07-23-09: NOA for N-400

08-14-09: Biometrics Appointment

09-08-09: Interview Date Oct 07

10-30-09: Oath Ceremony

11-20-09: Received Passport!!!

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hermano roberto!

todo bien. mucho trabajo. :(

Daniel

:energetic:


Ana (Mexico) ------ Daniel (California)(me)

---------------------------------------------

Sept. 11, 2004: Got married (civil), in Mexico :D

July 23, 2005: Church wedding

===============================

K3(I-129F):

Oct. 28, 2004: Mailed I-129F.

~USPS, First-Class, Certified Mail, Rtn Recpt ($5.80)

Nov. 3, 2004: NOA1!!!!

Nov. 5, 2004: Check Cashed!!

zzzz deep hibernationn zzzz

May 12, 2005 NOA2!!!! #######!!! huh???

off to NVC.

May 26, 2005: NVC approves I129F.

CR1(I-130):

Oct. 6, 2004: Mailed I-130.

~USPS, First-Class, Certified Mail, Rtn Recpt ($5.80)

Oct. 8, 2004: I-130 Delivered to CSC in Laguna Niguel.

~Per USPS website's tracking tool.

Oct. 12, 2004 BCIS-CSC Signs for I-130 packet.

Oct. 21, 2004 Check cashed!

Oct. 25, 2004 NOA1 (I-130) Go CSC!!

Jan. 05, 2005 Approved!!!! Off to NVC!!!!

===============================

NVC:

Jan. 05, 2005 ---> in route from CSC

Jan. 12, 2005 Case entered system

Jan. 29, 2005 Received I-864 Bill

Jan. 31, 2005 Sent Payment to St. Louis(I864)

Feb. 01, 2005 Wife received DS3032(Choice of Agent)

Feb. 05, 2005 Payment Received in St. Louis(I864)

Feb. 08, 2005 Sent DS3032 to Portsmouth NH

Feb. 12, 2005 DS3032 Received by NVC

Mar. 04, 2005 Received IV Bill

Mar. 04, 2005 Sent IV Bill Payment

Mar. 08, 2005 Received I864

Mar. 19, 2005 Sent I864

Mar. 21, 2005 I864 Received my NVC

Apr. 18, 2005 Received DS230

Apr. 19, 2005 Sent DS230

Apr. 20, 2005 DS230 received by NVC (signed by S Merfeld)

Apr. 22, 2005 DS230 entered NVC system

Apr. 27, 2005 CASE COMPLETE

May 10, 2005 CASE SENT TO JUAREZ

Off to Cd. Juarez! :D

calls to NVC: 6

===============================

CIUDAD JUAREZ, American Consulate:

Apr. 27, 2005 case completed at NVC.

May 10, 2005 in route to Juarez.

May 25, 2005 Case at consulate.

===============================

-- Legal Disclaimer:What I say is only a reflection of what I did, going to do, or may do; it may also reflect what I have read others did, are going to do, or may do. What you do or may do is what you do or may do. You do so or may do so strictly out of your on voilition; or follow what a lawyer advised you to do, or may do. Having said that: have a nice day!

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hermano roberto!

todo bien. mucho trabajo. :(

Daniel

:energetic:

no bueno... lo siento mucho.

hermano daniel, roberto no es "annoying"!!! :lol: :lol: :D


K-1 Timeline

11-29-05: Mailed I-129F Petition to CSC

12-06-05: NOA1

03-02-06: NOA2

03-23-06: Interview Date May 16

05-17-06: K-1 Visa Issued

05-20-06: Arrived at POE, Honolulu

07-17-06: Married

AOS Timeline

08-14-06: Mailed I-485 to Chicago

08-24-06: NOA for I-485

09-08-06: Biometrics Appointment

09-25-06: I-485 transferred to CSC

09-28-06: I-485 received at CSC

10-18-06: AOS Approved

10-21-06: Approval notice mailed

10-23-06: Received "Welcome Letter"

10-27-06: Received 2 yr Green Card

I-751 Timeline

07-21-08: Mailed I-751 to VSC

07-25-08: NOA for I-751

08-27-08: Biometrics Appointment

02-25-09: I-751 transferred to CSC

04-17-09: I-751 Approved

06-22-09: Received 10 yr Green Card

N-400 Timeline

07-20-09: Mailed N-400 to Lewisville, TX

07-23-09: NOA for N-400

08-14-09: Biometrics Appointment

09-08-09: Interview Date Oct 07

10-30-09: Oath Ceremony

11-20-09: Received Passport!!!

Share this post


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hermano roberto!

todo bien. mucho trabajo. :(

Daniel

:energetic:

no bueno... lo siento mucho.

hermano daniel, roberto no es "annoying"!!! :lol: :lol: :D

jajajaja la senora roberto no cree que roberto es "annoying". :D cierto? :unsure:

:lol:

Daniel

:energetic:


Ana (Mexico) ------ Daniel (California)(me)

---------------------------------------------

Sept. 11, 2004: Got married (civil), in Mexico :D

July 23, 2005: Church wedding

===============================

K3(I-129F):

Oct. 28, 2004: Mailed I-129F.

~USPS, First-Class, Certified Mail, Rtn Recpt ($5.80)

Nov. 3, 2004: NOA1!!!!

Nov. 5, 2004: Check Cashed!!

zzzz deep hibernationn zzzz

May 12, 2005 NOA2!!!! #######!!! huh???

off to NVC.

May 26, 2005: NVC approves I129F.

CR1(I-130):

Oct. 6, 2004: Mailed I-130.

~USPS, First-Class, Certified Mail, Rtn Recpt ($5.80)

Oct. 8, 2004: I-130 Delivered to CSC in Laguna Niguel.

~Per USPS website's tracking tool.

Oct. 12, 2004 BCIS-CSC Signs for I-130 packet.

Oct. 21, 2004 Check cashed!

Oct. 25, 2004 NOA1 (I-130) Go CSC!!

Jan. 05, 2005 Approved!!!! Off to NVC!!!!

===============================

NVC:

Jan. 05, 2005 ---> in route from CSC

Jan. 12, 2005 Case entered system

Jan. 29, 2005 Received I-864 Bill

Jan. 31, 2005 Sent Payment to St. Louis(I864)

Feb. 01, 2005 Wife received DS3032(Choice of Agent)

Feb. 05, 2005 Payment Received in St. Louis(I864)

Feb. 08, 2005 Sent DS3032 to Portsmouth NH

Feb. 12, 2005 DS3032 Received by NVC

Mar. 04, 2005 Received IV Bill

Mar. 04, 2005 Sent IV Bill Payment

Mar. 08, 2005 Received I864

Mar. 19, 2005 Sent I864

Mar. 21, 2005 I864 Received my NVC

Apr. 18, 2005 Received DS230

Apr. 19, 2005 Sent DS230

Apr. 20, 2005 DS230 received by NVC (signed by S Merfeld)

Apr. 22, 2005 DS230 entered NVC system

Apr. 27, 2005 CASE COMPLETE

May 10, 2005 CASE SENT TO JUAREZ

Off to Cd. Juarez! :D

calls to NVC: 6

===============================

CIUDAD JUAREZ, American Consulate:

Apr. 27, 2005 case completed at NVC.

May 10, 2005 in route to Juarez.

May 25, 2005 Case at consulate.

===============================

-- Legal Disclaimer:What I say is only a reflection of what I did, going to do, or may do; it may also reflect what I have read others did, are going to do, or may do. What you do or may do is what you do or may do. You do so or may do so strictly out of your on voilition; or follow what a lawyer advised you to do, or may do. Having said that: have a nice day!

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hermano roberto!

todo bien. mucho trabajo. :(

Daniel

:energetic:

no bueno... lo siento mucho.

hermano daniel, roberto no es "annoying"!!! :lol: :lol: :D

jajajaja la senora roberto no cree que roberto es "annoying". :D cierto? :unsure:

:lol:

Daniel

:energetic:

es la verdad! :innocent::lol::D


K-1 Timeline

11-29-05: Mailed I-129F Petition to CSC

12-06-05: NOA1

03-02-06: NOA2

03-23-06: Interview Date May 16

05-17-06: K-1 Visa Issued

05-20-06: Arrived at POE, Honolulu

07-17-06: Married

AOS Timeline

08-14-06: Mailed I-485 to Chicago

08-24-06: NOA for I-485

09-08-06: Biometrics Appointment

09-25-06: I-485 transferred to CSC

09-28-06: I-485 received at CSC

10-18-06: AOS Approved

10-21-06: Approval notice mailed

10-23-06: Received "Welcome Letter"

10-27-06: Received 2 yr Green Card

I-751 Timeline

07-21-08: Mailed I-751 to VSC

07-25-08: NOA for I-751

08-27-08: Biometrics Appointment

02-25-09: I-751 transferred to CSC

04-17-09: I-751 Approved

06-22-09: Received 10 yr Green Card

N-400 Timeline

07-20-09: Mailed N-400 to Lewisville, TX

07-23-09: NOA for N-400

08-14-09: Biometrics Appointment

09-08-09: Interview Date Oct 07

10-30-09: Oath Ceremony

11-20-09: Received Passport!!!

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hermano roberto!

todo bien. mucho trabajo. :(

Daniel

:energetic:

no bueno... lo siento mucho.

hermano daniel, roberto no es "annoying"!!! :lol: :lol: :D

jajajaja la senora roberto no cree que roberto es "annoying". :D cierto? :unsure:

:lol:

Daniel

:energetic:

es la verdad! :innocent::lol::D

muuyyyy bueno! :D:thumbs:

Daniel

:energetic:


Ana (Mexico) ------ Daniel (California)(me)

---------------------------------------------

Sept. 11, 2004: Got married (civil), in Mexico :D

July 23, 2005: Church wedding

===============================

K3(I-129F):

Oct. 28, 2004: Mailed I-129F.

~USPS, First-Class, Certified Mail, Rtn Recpt ($5.80)

Nov. 3, 2004: NOA1!!!!

Nov. 5, 2004: Check Cashed!!

zzzz deep hibernationn zzzz

May 12, 2005 NOA2!!!! #######!!! huh???

off to NVC.

May 26, 2005: NVC approves I129F.

CR1(I-130):

Oct. 6, 2004: Mailed I-130.

~USPS, First-Class, Certified Mail, Rtn Recpt ($5.80)

Oct. 8, 2004: I-130 Delivered to CSC in Laguna Niguel.

~Per USPS website's tracking tool.

Oct. 12, 2004 BCIS-CSC Signs for I-130 packet.

Oct. 21, 2004 Check cashed!

Oct. 25, 2004 NOA1 (I-130) Go CSC!!

Jan. 05, 2005 Approved!!!! Off to NVC!!!!

===============================

NVC:

Jan. 05, 2005 ---> in route from CSC

Jan. 12, 2005 Case entered system

Jan. 29, 2005 Received I-864 Bill

Jan. 31, 2005 Sent Payment to St. Louis(I864)

Feb. 01, 2005 Wife received DS3032(Choice of Agent)

Feb. 05, 2005 Payment Received in St. Louis(I864)

Feb. 08, 2005 Sent DS3032 to Portsmouth NH

Feb. 12, 2005 DS3032 Received by NVC

Mar. 04, 2005 Received IV Bill

Mar. 04, 2005 Sent IV Bill Payment

Mar. 08, 2005 Received I864

Mar. 19, 2005 Sent I864

Mar. 21, 2005 I864 Received my NVC

Apr. 18, 2005 Received DS230

Apr. 19, 2005 Sent DS230

Apr. 20, 2005 DS230 received by NVC (signed by S Merfeld)

Apr. 22, 2005 DS230 entered NVC system

Apr. 27, 2005 CASE COMPLETE

May 10, 2005 CASE SENT TO JUAREZ

Off to Cd. Juarez! :D

calls to NVC: 6

===============================

CIUDAD JUAREZ, American Consulate:

Apr. 27, 2005 case completed at NVC.

May 10, 2005 in route to Juarez.

May 25, 2005 Case at consulate.

===============================

-- Legal Disclaimer:What I say is only a reflection of what I did, going to do, or may do; it may also reflect what I have read others did, are going to do, or may do. What you do or may do is what you do or may do. You do so or may do so strictly out of your on voilition; or follow what a lawyer advised you to do, or may do. Having said that: have a nice day!

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claro que si!!! :D:luv:


K-1 Timeline

11-29-05: Mailed I-129F Petition to CSC

12-06-05: NOA1

03-02-06: NOA2

03-23-06: Interview Date May 16

05-17-06: K-1 Visa Issued

05-20-06: Arrived at POE, Honolulu

07-17-06: Married

AOS Timeline

08-14-06: Mailed I-485 to Chicago

08-24-06: NOA for I-485

09-08-06: Biometrics Appointment

09-25-06: I-485 transferred to CSC

09-28-06: I-485 received at CSC

10-18-06: AOS Approved

10-21-06: Approval notice mailed

10-23-06: Received "Welcome Letter"

10-27-06: Received 2 yr Green Card

I-751 Timeline

07-21-08: Mailed I-751 to VSC

07-25-08: NOA for I-751

08-27-08: Biometrics Appointment

02-25-09: I-751 transferred to CSC

04-17-09: I-751 Approved

06-22-09: Received 10 yr Green Card

N-400 Timeline

07-20-09: Mailed N-400 to Lewisville, TX

07-23-09: NOA for N-400

08-14-09: Biometrics Appointment

09-08-09: Interview Date Oct 07

10-30-09: Oath Ceremony

11-20-09: Received Passport!!!

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­¿Que?


Lady, people aren't chocolates. Do you know what they are mostly? Bastards. ####### coated bastards with ####### filling. But I don't find them half as annoying as I find naive bobble-headed optimists who walk around vomiting sunshine.

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