Waiting Sucks

[johnj 0]

I have decided to cancel my trip to Russia planned for the first week of October. We were both really looking forward to the time together and doing a celebration (unofficial) of our wedding in Russia for family and friends. Because of financial concerns, we have decided to postpone the celebration until after the interview and before she comes to America.

This puts me firmly in the camp of having to wait without the joy of a mid-K1 break together. Now, I really feel the pain of having to wait. Yes, I know it will only be another month or so till NOA2, then a couple weeks in New Hampshire then soon we get the interview date then get the papers together then the interview, etc. When we were planning the time together in October, the wait did not seem so bad; now with no time together next month, the wait really sucks!!

Thanks for letting me vent.

[jimnlena 8]

I feel your pain!! This waiting is for the birds! I am afraid of a hidden expense so I am not even planning for another trip, unless the noa2 takes till aafter 1st of year! If they had a periodic report of what is going on, it may not be so torturous!

[AKguy 1]

Vent away brother!

I'll be venting soon enough myself...

[1HappyGuy 45]

Everyone goes through the painful process of waiting and wondering, "What the h@## is happening". I managed the wait by imagining the USCIS workers are all older overweight women that are gripping about us guys bringing these young beautiful women to the USA. I can even hear them say, "This lousy SOB can wait a little longer as far as I'm concerned. I think I'll get another cup of coffee to help wash down my 3 donuts".

You know, that after this is all over and she's here, you will forget about the long wait and just be happy when you come home to her each night. Then you can say, "Life is Good".

[mox 298]

Completely understand what you're going through. If it's any consolation, I can tell you that when she finally gets here, the time you spent apart will seem like a blip. I know it rings hollow now, but hang in there! As Slim says, take the opportunity to get all your "guy stuff" out of the way now. Keep yourself busy doing the "single" stuff you won't do once she gets here, and also busy yourself preparing for her arrival.

[johnj 0]

Completely understand what you're going through. If it's any consolation, I can tell you that when she finally gets here, the time you spent apart will seem like a blip. I know it rings hollow now, but hang in there! As Slim says, take the opportunity to get all your "guy stuff" out of the way now. Keep yourself busy doing the "single" stuff you won't do once she gets here, and also busy yourself preparing for her arrival.

My "guy stuff" is done, has been for years; time for some "together stuff" now

[mox 298]

Completely understand what you're going through. If it's any consolation, I can tell you that when she finally gets here, the time you spent apart will seem like a blip. I know it rings hollow now, but hang in there! As Slim says, take the opportunity to get all your "guy stuff" out of the way now. Keep yourself busy doing the "single" stuff you won't do once she gets here, and also busy yourself preparing for her arrival.

My "guy stuff" is done, has been for years; time for some "together stuff" now

My "guy stuff" was also over and done with. I don't mean going to strip clubs or partying like a frat boy. I just mean little things. Watching the game while you snarf down a whole bag of Doritos with your (shoed) feet propped up on the coffee table, for example.

Anyway, however you spend your time, the best thing is to stay busy. I had some periods where I wasn't doing anything, and I practically went out of my mind. The busier I stayed, the easier it was on me. And for what it's worth, if it was a financial consideration to cancel your trip then I think you did the right thing. That couple thousand dollars you're saving will be a nice wedding gift for the happy couple.

[johnj 0]

And for what it's worth, if it was a financial consideration to cancel your trip then I think you did the right thing. That couple thousand dollars you're saving will be a nice wedding gift for the happy couple.

Because I am self-employed and work alone, it is so much more than just a couple thousand dollars. Just to leave for a week is a loss of well over $3000. Then there is all the other expenses associated with a trip.

The economy is tough now; I am doing fine but not great. Every month it is a struggle to make the $10K needed to pay our expenses.

[slim 1,514]

I had a girlfriend during my wait. The time flew by, and it was like my S/O was here before I knew it!

[johnj 0]

I had a girlfriend during my wait. The time flew by, and it was like my S/O was here before I knew it!

Did you keep the girlfriend, after your s/o arrived!

[clueless_in_usa 8]

I have decided to cancel my trip to Russia planned for the first week of October. We were both really looking forward to the time together and doing a celebration (unofficial) of our wedding in Russia for family and friends. Because of financial concerns, we have decided to postpone the celebration until after the interview and before she comes to America.

This puts me firmly in the camp of having to wait without the joy of a mid-K1 break together. Now, I really feel the pain of having to wait. Yes, I know it will only be another month or so till NOA2, then a couple weeks in New Hampshire then soon we get the interview date then get the papers together then the interview, etc. When we were planning the time together in October, the wait did not seem so bad; now with no time together next month, the wait really sucks!!

Thanks for letting me vent.

If it is any consolation, we waited seven months from NOA1 to visa granted in Moscow. Now we have to wait one more month before we are reunited (personal reasons). That should give you an idea of when to start making plans, if everything goes normal.

[AKguy 1]

I had a girlfriend during my wait. The time flew by, and it was like my S/O was here before I knew it!

Did you keep the girlfriend, after your s/o arrived!

I think she helped him type that message.

[Brad and Vika 129]

Completely understand what you're going through. If it's any consolation, I can tell you that when she finally gets here, the time you spent apart will seem like a blip. I know it rings hollow now, but hang in there! As Slim says, take the opportunity to get all your "guy stuff" out of the way now. Keep yourself busy doing the "single" stuff you won't do once she gets here, and also busy yourself preparing for her arrival.

My "guy stuff" is done, has been for years; time for some "together stuff" now

I know this has been said here many times before, but do lots of messaging, calling Skyping, what ever keeps you in touch. Look at it this way, you are saving thousands by not seeing each other, so you can afford a couple of hundred more to stay in contact other ways. And remember how you feel right now, because the memory will come in handy when she is poking you in the ribs at 3am because you're snoring

[amberdima 6]

I had a girlfriend during my wait. The time flew by, and it was like my S/O was here before I knew it!

oh slim, you should never keep just one. then it gets all relationshippy and sad when your fiance arrives.

[slim 1,514]

Did you keep the girlfriend, after your s/o arrived!

No. But we did work at the same place so I still had to see her sometimes.

I think she helped him type that message.

She actually would not talk to me for about three months. Not even so much as a hello. Finally several months later we all went out "as a group" from work and she and my wife met. I thought I was in for the best catfight ever, complete with pudding and/or oil, but they got on OK and did their best to be civil. She did her best to let me know what I was missing and I did my best to wave to my wife whenever she'd glance over at us.

Since I've switched jobs I haven't heard from her again.

oh slim, you should never keep just one. then it gets all relationshippy and sad when your fiance arrives.

I've always had a "primary" and several alternates, (up unitl I was married, of course) and I had full disclosure with this girl before we even started anything. "I have a fiancee, she's coming here in several months.... but in the mean time...." and everything was kosher because she knew about my fiancee and she even liked the fact that I had alternates - let's just say she wasn't afraid to share.

But, like you pointed out, it gets all relationshippy toward the end. I'll give her credit though because she'd catch herself every time and wouldn't cross the line. She'd start going in that direction and then stop herself. Maybe that's why she didn't talk to me for three months!