age difference

[Minya's wife 25]

There is NO women's liberation. Or very little, though some small amounts seem to be creeping in, very small amounts. For example, women can BY LAW be paid less than men for the same jobs.

I have no problem with this, and wish it was the same in USA.

Are you kidding me?

Wow....horrified this kind of ignorant, self important attitude by backward men like you is still in existence.

No it's the Self Liberated, Everything is About Me attitude that screws up a good woman.......

Me Tarzan, you Jane!

[leapoffaith 0]

Well, I am (1) three years younger than my wife (2) of different race viz. she is white and I am brown (3) different religion viz. she is catholic while I am hindu. Still, I am more comfortable now than I would have been if married to some US born indian lady. The fact is we are married and there is no deception, so I deserve to get the PR.

[Jasman0717 9]

There was a member here whose fiance was from Romania (I think) and her petition was denied because she was several years older. She ended up moving there. She was so sweet, it was too bad about the outcome of her petition.

Are you sure that is why the petition was denied? I'm just wondering, as age discrimination is a stated reason why a petition can be denied at the USCIS level, nor is it a stated reason why the visa can be denied by the CO. But suspecting that there aren't sufficient relationship bona-fides because of a large age difference is allowed and quite often sets the burden of proof bar so high, that it cannot be met which is when the denial is triggered.

-P

They will not tell you it was denied due to age but all the information the petitioner was posting questioned their relationship. I guess you will need to do a forum search and see if you can find her posts.

[Minya's wife 25]

There was a member here whose fiance was from Romania (I think) and her petition was denied because she was several years older. She ended up moving there. She was so sweet, it was too bad about the outcome of her petition.

Are you sure that is why the petition was denied? I'm just wondering, as age discrimination is a stated reason why a petition can be denied at the USCIS level, nor is it a stated reason why the visa can be denied by the CO. But suspecting that there aren't sufficient relationship bona-fides because of a large age difference is allowed and quite often sets the burden of proof bar so high, that it cannot be met which is when the denial is triggered.

-P

They will not tell you it was denied due to age but all the information the petitioner was posting questioned their relationship. I guess you will need to do a forum search and see if you can find her posts.

I remember reading something about their case when I was doing my own research re. this subject. Of course they will not state that the reverse age-difference is the issue and the denial will be based on questioning the relationship bona-fides. What I would love to see are statistics on how many denials, based upon bona-fides, occur in those visa applications w/ a reverse age-difference? Based upon what I've seen here (and I know VJ is only a microcosm of the family based visa process) it seems to me that it occurs more in cases where the woman is significantly older than the man.

-P

[John and Camie 39]

so.............

I am a Naturalized USC ( from Canada ) I am 38

and my husband is German and 27.

you think that 11 years in age difference will be a problem at the AOS interview?!

Now I am scared... Our relationship is genuine and wonderful!

Aww, no worries, girl. I'm 7 years older than my fiance, and while that's not exactly 11, it's still older. Also, he's white, I'm mixed Black/Latina ... and while I could worry about that as well, I'm just gonna sit back, enjoy what he and I have, and ride this K-1 wave out.

Enjoy your genuine and wonderful relationship. I feel you

[Ellie-and-David 38]

There is NO women's liberation. Or very little, though some small amounts seem to be creeping in, very small amounts. For example, women can BY LAW be paid less than men for the same jobs.

I have no problem with this, and wish it was the same in USA.

Are you kidding me?

Wow....horrified this kind of ignorant, self important attitude by backward men like you is still in existence.

No it's the Self Liberated, Everything is About Me attitude that screws up a good woman.......

If it was all about me, I'd be making him move here.

You make sweeping generalisations that are damaging. Women are capable of being devoted wives without accepting standards that make them slaves to their husbands. I love my fiance. And i get pi**ed at any one who tells me that because I am capable of earning as much as him and more, I am not being a "good" wife. In fact the liberation of women has also to some extent liberated men. And now, because I am educated and capable of contributing to the house hold, both sexes have more choices. Dont you WANT the choice not to have to fulfill this role of always having to be the strong one? Relied upon one? The one that everything rests upon? I want to be a team with my future husband, be able to work while he goes back to school, know that I have his back all the way and if something goes wrong with his job (which it has right now) I am there to take the slack while we work everything out.

I dont want to spend HIS money. I want to earn my own. It's so frustrating to see men want to keep us as housewives in one breath, but moan that we spend all the money and dont adequately contribute in another. You see that all the time on these boards.

I am glad he wanted to marry someone who is capable of challenging him on every level. The only thing I am no challenge to him in is cooking (do you WANT to get poisoned???) and chess.

Hey, here's hoping all the liberated women around your wife dont rub off on her. I hope you are keeping her hidden away from the world as it is today.

[Gary and Alla 3,696]

There is NO women's liberation. Or very little, though some small amounts seem to be creeping in, very small amounts. For example, women can BY LAW be paid less than men for the same jobs.

I have no problem with this, and wish it was the same in USA.

Are you kidding me?

Wow....horrified this kind of ignorant, self important attitude by backward men like you is still in existence.

No it's the Self Liberated, Everything is About Me attitude that screws up a good woman.......

If it was all about me, I'd be making him move here.

You make sweeping generalisations that are damaging. Women are capable of being devoted wives without accepting standards that make them slaves to their husbands. I love my fiance. And i get pi**ed at any one who tells me that because I am capable of earning as much as him and more, I am not being a "good" wife. In fact the liberation of women has also to some extent liberated men. And now, because I am educated and capable of contributing to the house hold, both sexes have more choices. Dont you WANT the choice not to have to fulfill this role of always having to be the strong one? Relied upon one? The one that everything rests upon? I want to be a team with my future husband, be able to work while he goes back to school, know that I have his back all the way and if something goes wrong with his job (which it has right now) I am there to take the slack while we work everything out.

I dont want to spend HIS money. I want to earn my own. It's so frustrating to see men want to keep us as housewives in one breath, but moan that we spend all the money and dont adequately contribute in another. You see that all the time on these boards.

I am glad he wanted to marry someone who is capable of challenging him on every level. The only thing I am no challenge to him in is cooking (do you WANT to get poisoned???) and chess.

Hey, here's hoping all the liberated women around your wife dont rub off on her. I hope you are keeping her hidden away from the world as it is today.

I will only say this, about that. I lived in England also. I married a Ukrainian. What do you think?

[Ellie-and-David 38]

There is NO women's liberation. Or very little, though some small amounts seem to be creeping in, very small amounts. For example, women can BY LAW be paid less than men for the same jobs.

I have no problem with this, and wish it was the same in USA.

Are you kidding me?

Wow....horrified this kind of ignorant, self important attitude by backward men like you is still in existence.

No it's the Self Liberated, Everything is About Me attitude that screws up a good woman.......

Apparently evolution doesn't always work.... ^^^^ ..... I wish you were kidding, dude...but I reckon you're just lacking in self-esteem. That's what usually motivates the desire to be unquestioned...how freaking boring....I could never respect a woman who didn't regard herself as my equal in every way.

And, for that matter, cannot respect any man who thinks of women as being inherently subservient.

Dave.

Edited February 26, 2009 by Ellie-and-David

[Ellie-and-David 38]

There is NO women's liberation. Or very little, though some small amounts seem to be creeping in, very small amounts. For example, women can BY LAW be paid less than men for the same jobs.

I have no problem with this, and wish it was the same in USA.

Are you kidding me?

Wow....horrified this kind of ignorant, self important attitude by backward men like you is still in existence.

No it's the Self Liberated, Everything is About Me attitude that screws up a good woman.......

If it was all about me, I'd be making him move here.

You make sweeping generalisations that are damaging. Women are capable of being devoted wives without accepting standards that make them slaves to their husbands. I love my fiance. And i get pi**ed at any one who tells me that because I am capable of earning as much as him and more, I am not being a "good" wife. In fact the liberation of women has also to some extent liberated men. And now, because I am educated and capable of contributing to the house hold, both sexes have more choices. Dont you WANT the choice not to have to fulfill this role of always having to be the strong one? Relied upon one? The one that everything rests upon? I want to be a team with my future husband, be able to work while he goes back to school, know that I have his back all the way and if something goes wrong with his job (which it has right now) I am there to take the slack while we work everything out.

I dont want to spend HIS money. I want to earn my own. It's so frustrating to see men want to keep us as housewives in one breath, but moan that we spend all the money and dont adequately contribute in another. You see that all the time on these boards.

I am glad he wanted to marry someone who is capable of challenging him on every level. The only thing I am no challenge to him in is cooking (do you WANT to get poisoned???) and chess.

Hey, here's hoping all the liberated women around your wife dont rub off on her. I hope you are keeping her hidden away from the world as it is today.

I will only say this, about that. I lived in England also. I married a Ukrainian. What do you think?

I think that was a chickenspit sort of agreement with Tallcoolone's Neanderthal views? Correct me if I'm wrong.

Dave.

[Gary and Alla 3,696]

There is NO women's liberation. Or very little, though some small amounts seem to be creeping in, very small amounts. For example, women can BY LAW be paid less than men for the same jobs.

I have no problem with this, and wish it was the same in USA.

Are you kidding me?

Wow....horrified this kind of ignorant, self important attitude by backward men like you is still in existence.

No it's the Self Liberated, Everything is About Me attitude that screws up a good woman.......

If it was all about me, I'd be making him move here.

You make sweeping generalisations that are damaging. Women are capable of being devoted wives without accepting standards that make them slaves to their husbands. I love my fiance. And i get pi**ed at any one who tells me that because I am capable of earning as much as him and more, I am not being a "good" wife. In fact the liberation of women has also to some extent liberated men. And now, because I am educated and capable of contributing to the house hold, both sexes have more choices. Dont you WANT the choice not to have to fulfill this role of always having to be the strong one? Relied upon one? The one that everything rests upon? I want to be a team with my future husband, be able to work while he goes back to school, know that I have his back all the way and if something goes wrong with his job (which it has right now) I am there to take the slack while we work everything out.

I dont want to spend HIS money. I want to earn my own. It's so frustrating to see men want to keep us as housewives in one breath, but moan that we spend all the money and dont adequately contribute in another. You see that all the time on these boards.

I am glad he wanted to marry someone who is capable of challenging him on every level. The only thing I am no challenge to him in is cooking (do you WANT to get poisoned???) and chess.

Hey, here's hoping all the liberated women around your wife dont rub off on her. I hope you are keeping her hidden away from the world as it is today.

I will only say this, about that. I lived in England also. I married a Ukrainian. What do you think?

I think that was a chickenspit sort of agreement with Tallcoolone's Neanderthal views? Correct me if I'm wrong.

Dave.

Вы имеете право интерпретировать это, поскольку ваша жена позволяет Вам.

[Ellie-and-David 38]

There is NO women's liberation. Or very little, though some small amounts seem to be creeping in, very small amounts. For example, women can BY LAW be paid less than men for the same jobs.

I have no problem with this, and wish it was the same in USA.

Are you kidding me?

Wow....horrified this kind of ignorant, self important attitude by backward men like you is still in existence.

No it's the Self Liberated, Everything is About Me attitude that screws up a good woman.......

If it was all about me, I'd be making him move here.

You make sweeping generalisations that are damaging. Women are capable of being devoted wives without accepting standards that make them slaves to their husbands. I love my fiance. And i get pi**ed at any one who tells me that because I am capable of earning as much as him and more, I am not being a "good" wife. In fact the liberation of women has also to some extent liberated men. And now, because I am educated and capable of contributing to the house hold, both sexes have more choices. Dont you WANT the choice not to have to fulfill this role of always having to be the strong one? Relied upon one? The one that everything rests upon? I want to be a team with my future husband, be able to work while he goes back to school, know that I have his back all the way and if something goes wrong with his job (which it has right now) I am there to take the slack while we work everything out.

I dont want to spend HIS money. I want to earn my own. It's so frustrating to see men want to keep us as housewives in one breath, but moan that we spend all the money and dont adequately contribute in another. You see that all the time on these boards.

I am glad he wanted to marry someone who is capable of challenging him on every level. The only thing I am no challenge to him in is cooking (do you WANT to get poisoned???) and chess.

Hey, here's hoping all the liberated women around your wife dont rub off on her. I hope you are keeping her hidden away from the world as it is today.

I will only say this, about that. I lived in England also. I married a Ukrainian. What do you think?

I think that was a chickenspit sort of agreement with Tallcoolone's Neanderthal views? Correct me if I'm wrong.

Dave.

Вы имеете право интерпретировать это, поскольку ваша жена позволяет Вам.

You know the rules.....English on a non regional forum please.

Ellie

[Ellie-and-David 38]

There is NO women's liberation. Or very little, though some small amounts seem to be creeping in, very small amounts. For example, women can BY LAW be paid less than men for the same jobs.

I have no problem with this, and wish it was the same in USA.

Are you kidding me?

Wow....horrified this kind of ignorant, self important attitude by backward men like you is still in existence.

No it's the Self Liberated, Everything is About Me attitude that screws up a good woman.......

If it was all about me, I'd be making him move here.

You make sweeping generalisations that are damaging. Women are capable of being devoted wives without accepting standards that make them slaves to their husbands. I love my fiance. And i get pi**ed at any one who tells me that because I am capable of earning as much as him and more, I am not being a "good" wife. In fact the liberation of women has also to some extent liberated men. And now, because I am educated and capable of contributing to the house hold, both sexes have more choices. Dont you WANT the choice not to have to fulfill this role of always having to be the strong one? Relied upon one? The one that everything rests upon? I want to be a team with my future husband, be able to work while he goes back to school, know that I have his back all the way and if something goes wrong with his job (which it has right now) I am there to take the slack while we work everything out.

I dont want to spend HIS money. I want to earn my own. It's so frustrating to see men want to keep us as housewives in one breath, but moan that we spend all the money and dont adequately contribute in another. You see that all the time on these boards.

I am glad he wanted to marry someone who is capable of challenging him on every level. The only thing I am no challenge to him in is cooking (do you WANT to get poisoned???) and chess.

Hey, here's hoping all the liberated women around your wife dont rub off on her. I hope you are keeping her hidden away from the world as it is today.

I will only say this, about that. I lived in England also. I married a Ukrainian. What do you think?

I think that was a chickenspit sort of agreement with Tallcoolone's Neanderthal views? Correct me if I'm wrong.

Dave.

Вы имеете право интерпретировать это, поскольку ваша жена позволяет Вам.

No, dude. Equal means equal. She doesn't have to 'allow' me a thing, nor I her....you should strive for more of that in your relationships.

Dave (obviously, hahahahaaa)

Edited February 26, 2009 by Ellie-and-David

[DanielParul 50]

I am 5.5 years older than my husband. In a country like India that can be a problem but we concentrated on the evidence we had (didn't need to try too hard coz we just had so much) and all turned out fine.

[Gary and Alla 3,696]

There is NO women's liberation. Or very little, though some small amounts seem to be creeping in, very small amounts. For example, women can BY LAW be paid less than men for the same jobs.

I have no problem with this, and wish it was the same in USA.

Are you kidding me?

Wow....horrified this kind of ignorant, self important attitude by backward men like you is still in existence.

No it's the Self Liberated, Everything is About Me attitude that screws up a good woman.......

If it was all about me, I'd be making him move here.

You make sweeping generalisations that are damaging. Women are capable of being devoted wives without accepting standards that make them slaves to their husbands. I love my fiance. And i get pi**ed at any one who tells me that because I am capable of earning as much as him and more, I am not being a "good" wife. In fact the liberation of women has also to some extent liberated men. And now, because I am educated and capable of contributing to the house hold, both sexes have more choices. Dont you WANT the choice not to have to fulfill this role of always having to be the strong one? Relied upon one? The one that everything rests upon? I want to be a team with my future husband, be able to work while he goes back to school, know that I have his back all the way and if something goes wrong with his job (which it has right now) I am there to take the slack while we work everything out.

I dont want to spend HIS money. I want to earn my own. It's so frustrating to see men want to keep us as housewives in one breath, but moan that we spend all the money and dont adequately contribute in another. You see that all the time on these boards.

I am glad he wanted to marry someone who is capable of challenging him on every level. The only thing I am no challenge to him in is cooking (do you WANT to get poisoned???) and chess.

Hey, here's hoping all the liberated women around your wife dont rub off on her. I hope you are keeping her hidden away from the world as it is today.

I will only say this, about that. I lived in England also. I married a Ukrainian. What do you think?

I think that was a chickenspit sort of agreement with Tallcoolone's Neanderthal views? Correct me if I'm wrong.

Dave.

Вы имеете право интерпретировать это, поскольку ваша жена позволяет Вам.

No, dude. Equal means equal. She doesn't have to 'allow' me a thing, nor I her....you should strive for more of that in your relationships.

Dave (obviously, hahahahaaa)

Obviously.

It is normal for there to be misunderstanding by disenfranchised liberated women. First I will note they support "freedom of choice" unless someone doesn't choose like them and then we should try to be more like them instead of respecting the "choice" they propose to support. Nothing new there.

Second, there is the opinion that not needing a spouses permission is somehow good or that I even indicated such a thing. I never indicated I didn't need her permission. I presumed you also did. Sorry, my mistake. I was wrong. I forgot. Permission is not necessary from a spouse who has surrendered all her power as a woman by being "equal". I mean really, dude, who cares what they think? Who needs their permission? Right? I mean they are the same, one of the guys right? I mean who does she think she is? Right?

In fact a traditional wife, such as mine, is extremely powerful and you can bet I ask her permission or consent, especially on anything having to do with her responsibilities. It is because she cares and I respect her work and what she takes control of. She cares and respects what I do. We are most definitely "equal" in our areas of responsibility. I think "tallcoolone" would agree. Traditional wives are not for beginners, best to practice with liberated women first.

Giving oneself to another, and that is what this is, nothing more, nothing less. It is making a conscientious decision to offer another all you have to give, body and soul, it does not lessen your power, freedom or abilities. Being a wife and mother hardly takes away from her masters degree and she still speaks four languages, she gave none of that up. She has a husband who would walk on fire for her and jumps to please her as she does to please him. Heck, I even sleep toward the window in case a bear comes, I will be eaten while she escapes. How devoted can I get!?

Enjoying being a feminine woman, I mean really enjoying it, hardly diminishes her womanhood. Personally I think so-called liberated women are insecure and more so every day. They realize they surrendered the very things that made them powerful. Too smart by half...hoist on their own petard. Oops.

Now me, I am sure not going to tell you that you need to be more like me, it is a learning process and will take some time, sounds like you have a good teacher. And I am not going to suggest that your relationship needs to be more like ours. Far be it from me. I feel no need to try and impose my beliefs on others, I am a liberal like that really. I support everyone's right to make a choice for themselves. I would just never choose someone for my wife that had surrendered her womanhood and had nothing to give me. Oh, I am sure that sounds selfish, not so. I mean it should be mutally beneficial, right? I have something to offer her and she has something to offer me. Or else why not stay single? If I wanted to do everything without asking permission, I could have stayed single. There was no one around that cared, wy get married and still have no one that cares? I gained much by being married and gave something up, is is what happens when lives truly join. In my opinion. Those two separate lives end and a one begins. Sounds stupid I suppose, bt I truly believe it is the meaning of marriage and I am not even a religious guy, it isn't about religion, it is about devotion to each other. And I have my wife's permission to say so.

PS: My wife would just have read what I wrote and responded in Russian, or English or Ukrainian or Italian. She doesn't need the online translation wizard. See, she kept all that wonderful knowledge. Do you think neandrethals spoke 3 or 4 languages?

[lost in Egypt 4 u 0]

Has anybody had any problems with a K1 Visa because of a big age difference between the couple? Being the woman way older than the man.

Yes and if u were smart u would stop it now ..........he wants the green card !