SCAMMED FOR A GREEN CARD

[Kevin & Maria 0]

I'm sorry to hear that, Steph, but just know that there'll always be sunshine after the rain. Just always pray and know that God is always there for you. This verse also helps me when times get rough, Romans 8:28. God bless you, Steph! Things will turn out fine, you'll see

Kevin and Maria

[stephanieh_67 1]

Thank you for everyone that have been very supportive during these difficult times for myself and my 9 yr old daughter.

Abdeslam Chahir filed for divorce last week. Since he had left in the beginning of January, he has not maintained any type of contact. This surprises and angers me because of the way he just abandoned my daughter. When they met, she was only 4 years old and he promised to be her daddy for the rest of her life. I do believe that he loved her. I'm not saying that he is financially responsible for her, but that is besides the point. When I met him, we both agreed that one day he would officially adopt her. Of course, things started to really change when the lifting on conditions came around and when he got his green card. He became very distant, not wanting to do any type of family functions, eventually stop spending time with my daughter. He insisted that he sleep in his own room, so my daughter gave up her room and slept with me. He started opening up various bank accounts in his name only. At first he did let me have access to his bank account to pay bills and so forth. But everything totally changed after getting the damn green card. I was no longer able to check any of his bank balances, he stopped giving me any type of money, even is I need to go to the grocery store. He would make comments like that was his money and that I what was wrong with me using my own. Last time we even had a "date" night was like december 2005...we were married dec 2004. I honestly thought that he was depressed, and I begged him to see a doctor or someone to talk to. He said that it would never help our marriage. Keep in mind that he will be graduating this summer with a design engineering degree. I just feel that I was scammed by the way thing progressed or didn't progress in the marriage.

I'm not here on VJ to say all Moroccan men are scammers. I just wanted to share my story. And yes, this is extremely painful for me and my daughter. Now, he is trying to get me to pay for his attorneys fees! I do not think that it is right for what he has done. Sara535 knows my story better than anyone here. My next step is the divorce.....

Thank you for listening to me gab. Sorry if I offened anyone. I do love Morocco and Moroccan food just as much as I did before

Stephanie

Edited February 25, 2009 by stephanieh_67

[Imua 0]

Thank you for everyone that have been very supportive during these difficult times for myself and my 9 yr old daughter.

Abdeslam Chahir filed for divorce last week. Since he had left in the beginning of January, he has not maintained any type of contact. This surprises and angers me because of the way he just abandoned my daughter. When they met, she was only 4 years old and he promised to be her daddy for the rest of her life. I do believe that he loved her. I'm not saying that he is financially responsible for her, but that is besides the point. When I met him, we both agreed that one day he would officially adopt her. Of course, things started to really change when the lifting on conditions came around and when he got his green card. He became very distant, not wanting to do any type of family functions, eventually stop spending time with my daughter. He insisted that he sleep in his own room, so my daughter gave up her room and slept with me. He started opening up various bank accounts in his name only. At first he did let me have access to his bank account to pay bills and so forth. But everything totally changed after getting the damn green card. I was no longer able to check any of his bank balances, he stopped giving me any type of money, even is I need to go to the grocery store. He would make comments like that was his money and that I what was wrong with me using my own. Last time we even had a "date" night was like december 2005...we were married dec 2004. I honestly thought that he was depressed, and I begged him to see a doctor or someone to talk to. He said that it would never help our marriage. Keep in mind that he will be graduating this summer with a design engineering degree. I just feel that I was scammed by the way thing progressed or didn't progress in the marriage.

I'm not here on VJ to say all Moroccan men are scammers. I just wanted to share my story. And yes, this is extremely painful for me and my daughter. Now, he is trying to get me to pay for his attorneys fees! I do not think that it is right for what he has done. Sara535 knows my story better than anyone here. My next step is the divorce.....

Thank you for listening to me gab. Sorry if I offened anyone. I do love Morocco and Moroccan food just as much as I did before

Stephanie

Ugh, so sorry to hear this happened to you.....(((((hugs))))) to you... I just hope you didn't pay for his schooling or are responsible for any student loans that he incurred. I got through 2 master's degrees with no loans(combo of scholarships, cheap state school, living at home and working through school) and am very happy and proud of it seeing how students nowadays are so burdened with loans and starting careers which don;t even pay that much.... My husband doesn't have a degree and I have thought would I help him to get one? I think I would wait a couple of years after he gets here(he will have his 10yr unconditional GC) before I would even consider it. In this economy I really don't want to incur any more debt.

I fell in love with Nepal and Nepali culture years before I met my husband and sometimes wonder if I would still feel the same if he left me or if it would only hurt too much, bring back painful memories - glad to hear you still love Morocco and don't give up hope, you may still meet an honest Moroccan man. There are stories here on VJ of women who are on their 2nd marriage with a foreign man after being scammed and are now happy... I was almost scammed by a Nepali(didn't make it to filing papers, thank God) so hopefully that was my trial and this time it's for real. It doesn't just happen with USCs either. You don't hear much about Nepalis scamming USCs but I think they do it more with Euros - more European tourists go to Nepal than Americans. Govi's aunt told me a story about a German woman who was scammed by a Sherpa guide who dumped her after getting papers, then ended up marrying another Sherpa who turned out to be an honest man and they are still together. So don't give up hope - now maybe it feels like you will never fall in love again(I felt that way after being scammed) but life has better things in store for you I am sure.

Edited February 25, 2009 by Pattu Rani

[~Jackie~ 30]

Thank you for posting. I hope everyone involved can start to heal after the divorce.

Jackie

Edited February 25, 2009 by just_Jackie

[JODO 2]

Sorry that happened to you Stephanieh. I know someone whom I fear is walking right into a situation just like this. I have decided to stop worrying about it, as we all have our own crosses to bear. I hope you and your daughter can move on. I think it just stinks to high heaven when children are involved and they get hurt like this.

Good Luck

[childress_london 3]

Thanks for coming back and sharing the rest of your story. I just don't understand how someone can intentionally break hearts (especially a child's) for their own selfish purposes. It's amazing the things people can do. I'm just wondering if at any time during your marriage you had any suspicions or was he a good actor?

[sara535 15]

(((Stephanie)))

[JeanneVictoria 55]

So sorry Stephanie. Best of luck to you and your daughter.

[Muh and me 18]

Hugs to you and your daughter!

[Staashi 371]

(((((((((((Stephanie)))))))))))) God bless you and your little girl.

To everyone else out there who may be doubters or think that this can't happen to them...behold the power of the Almighty Greencard.

[Beauty for Ashes 257]

(((((((((((Stephanie)))))))))))) God bless you and your little girl.

To everyone else out there who may be doubters or think that this can't happen to them...behold the power of the Almighty Greencard.

Its important to remember that ALOT of things happen when conditions are removed. You cannot paint everyone with the same brush but the minute they start moving into the other room and cut you off from their finances, its pretty sure 100000 percent that they are on their way out. At that point , you need to kick their #### out and move because if an arab is going to stop finanically contributing and not having sex with you,, well baby the writing is on the wall and you better pay attention.

Again, not all are like this and sometimes someone who marries for papers can turn around and actually begin to love their ticket out.

PS. My daughter is arab and her father HAD HIS PAPERS and he isnt paying child support or helping me and is a ###### father and he DID NOT USE ME FOR PAPERS. He used another girl in New York for papers in 1998 and dumped her as soon as she removed conditions and did not even give her a divorce. He just picked up his bags and walked and left her with all the problems of getting divorced. He is now almost arrested for not paying child support for my daughter and guess what babies.. PAY BACK IS A ######. I hope her scum husband marries a hooker from back home and takes all his money and scams him and uses him for papers

Dont worry Stephanie. Tell everyone what he did INCLUDING immigration so when he goes for citizenship it takes alot longer and he has a tough time importing a honey from back home. EVERYTHING COMES AROUND.. Until then , enjoy your life and keep going and do not get bitter. That scum bag is not worth it

[Imua 0]

I have to wonder sometimes with these GC scammers if we will be seeing less of them trolling Yahoo chat and pulling their sh!t with the US economy going down - even the illegals are leaving so I think many of these scumbags' plans of taking advantage of a kindhearted USC, getting successful and biding their time, divorcing and then marrying a hottie from home will be foiled - kinda hard these days even to get a dishwasher job let alone get the kind of money to marry and support a traditional wife and kids.