USCIS, you win...sort of...and a question about canceling the K-1

[KimandRuss 0]

again... please keep this disucssion on topic.

Thanks.

edit to add: Thank you Badgerella

Edited November 12, 2008 by KimandRuss

[zhongyuan34 0]

Donna-Marie, I do apologize, my post to you was rude. I am sorry. Emotions got the better of me. Your latest post about my intentions show that you very much understand the idea I had.

"The Dear USCIS" letter was intended as satire -- originally. But the more I think about it, maybe it's not a bad idea to make a life over there. I moved back to the States after living in China for five years, found a job and dove right into the K-1 process -- rather ignorantly, my mistake. If I had figured out what a backlog there are on apps, I would have stayed in China and done things differently.

I have more of a life in China than I do in America, for better or for worse. Insofar as I have meaningful work, it's also there -- I speak the language fairly well. The two of us could have good lives there. I don't really want to be an expatriate for the rest of my life -- and I think my wife-to-be deserves a chance to experience the States, but maybe it's a way for us.

I am a total wuss on the separation thing, compared to other people on this forum. I've said before and I'll say again, to people who have been waiting years...I bow down to you. I just can't do that.

And yes I'm the "same guy" who was asking about a student visa -- I, in my ignorance, had no idea that it was fraudulent for someone to come to the States as a student and also get married. (Again, this seems incredibly myopic of the G -- people can't genuinely want to study AND get married, as she does?) Obviously we won't do that since it's illegal, but it seems bizarre that that's the case.

I just can't believe that canceling the K-1 and starting a different process once we're married in China would somehow be fraudulent though. I guess I can ask a friend at the consulate over there if that's the case. Plus, if the K-1 takes a year or more as it seems too, she still would have to spend another nine months or so getting the green card once she's here. The time-to-benefit ratio of the K-1 seems to go out the window.

Thanks to all the posters here, and again, sorry for any offense to anyone that my post may have caused.

[cdneh 3,112]

There is no 'fast track around all the nonsense' You can't circumvent the process. If it could be legally done we all would.

[rebeccajo 14]

again... please keep this disucssion on topic.

Thanks.

edit to add: Thank you Badgerella

It is on topic to discuss whether or not to move because of the time it takes to process the K.

This seems to be the only reason the OP has cited for such a life altering decision. It is not wrong to point out to the OP that this isn't the best reason upon which to make such a choice.

Life is long and hopefully so is marriage. International couples do have a choice where to live - the choice should be made based upon where their life together will be the most fulfilling, not upon the time it takes to satisfy their governments.

[Gemmie 142]

I realise this isn't an important question, but quick question; if you're not willing to be seperated and want to be together instantly... are you even able to simply move to China without paperwork? Or is a case of a matter of weeks rather than months?

[KimandRuss 0]

Thank you for your imput (as always) Rebecca, but there were personal attacks and not related to the discussion ...that were then edited. Therefore, I asked that it be kept on topic and away from personal attacks.

again... please keep this disucssion on topic.

Thanks.

edit to add: Thank you Badgerella

It is on topic to discuss whether or not to move because of the time it takes to process the K.

This seems to be the only reason the OP has cited for such a life altering decision. It is not wrong to point out to the OP that this isn't the best reason upon which to make such a choice.

Life is long and hopefully so is marriage. International couples do have a choice where to live - the choice should be made based upon where their life together will be the most fulfilling, not upon the time it takes to satisfy their governments.

[Damian P 92]

calm down, did you forget your meds?

Calm down!!??? Yeah, says you!!!! I'm sure Virtual Wife would agree!! I'll never be able look at Linus from Peanuts in the same way ever again!!

[Carlawarla 1]

Donna-Marie, I do apologize, my post to you was rude. I am sorry. Emotions got the better of me. Your latest post about my intentions show that you very much understand the idea I had.

"The Dear USCIS" letter was intended as satire -- originally. But the more I think about it, maybe it's not a bad idea to make a life over there. I moved back to the States after living in China for five years, found a job and dove right into the K-1 process -- rather ignorantly, my mistake. If I had figured out what a backlog there are on apps, I would have stayed in China and done things differently.

I have more of a life in China than I do in America, for better or for worse. Insofar as I have meaningful work, it's also there -- I speak the language fairly well. The two of us could have good lives there. I don't really want to be an expatriate for the rest of my life -- and I think my wife-to-be deserves a chance to experience the States, but maybe it's a way for us.

I am a total wuss on the separation thing, compared to other people on this forum. I've said before and I'll say again, to people who have been waiting years...I bow down to you. I just can't do that.

And yes I'm the "same guy" who was asking about a student visa -- I, in my ignorance, had no idea that it was fraudulent for someone to come to the States as a student and also get married. (Again, this seems incredibly myopic of the G -- people can't genuinely want to study AND get married, as she does?) Obviously we won't do that since it's illegal, but it seems bizarre that that's the case.

I just can't believe that canceling the K-1 and starting a different process once we're married in China would somehow be fraudulent though. I guess I can ask a friend at the consulate over there if that's the case. Plus, if the K-1 takes a year or more as it seems too, she still would have to spend another nine months or so getting the green card once she's here. The time-to-benefit ratio of the K-1 seems to go out the window.

Thanks to all the posters here, and again, sorry for any offense to anyone that my post may have caused.

Whatever you decide, being with the love of your life is what's important in the grand scheme of things. I read this thread yesterday and came back to read more replies and see your last posting here. I don't know who specifically gave you the information that cancelling a K-1 and starting a different process once you're married in China would be fraudulent, but it's not. So please, put that thought from your mind.

[Sinergy 3]

calm down, did you forget your meds?

Calm down!!??? Yeah, says you!!!! I'm sure Virtual Wife would agree!! I'll never be able look at Linus from Peanuts in the same way ever again!!

:lol:

believe it or not i was very calm at that moment

Edited November 13, 2008 by Sinergy

[al-Hubb jameel 0]

I got quite an ironic chuckle from reading your clever letter.

I can not answer your question, but I can give you support. It seems like you are not making your decision untill closer to summer, but it doesn't hurt to start thinking of alternatives now. Kudos to you for that and for loving her so much that you are able and willing to give up everything you have here to be with her, should it come to that. Best of luck to you both.