A presidental speach

[Sinergy 3]

This was emailed to me:

WOULDN'T IT BE GREAT TO TURN ON THE TV AND HEAR ANY U.S.

PRESIDENT,

DEMOCRAT OR REPUBLICAN GIVE THE FOLLOWING SPEECH?

'My Fellow Americans: As you all know, the defeat of the Iraq

regime

has been completed.

Since congress does not want to spend any more money on this

war,

our mission in Iraq is complete. This morning I gave the order for a

complete removal of all American forces from Iraq This action will be

complete within30 days. It is now time to begin the reckoning.

Before me, I have two lists. One list contains the names of countries

which have stood by our side during the Iraq conflict. This list is

short. The

United Kingdom , Spain , Bulgaria , Australia , and Poland are some of

the

countries listed there.

The other list contains every one not on the first list. Most of the

world's

nations are on that list. My press secretary will be distributing copies

of

both lists later this evening. Let me start by saying that effective

immediately, foreign aid to those nations on List 2 ceases immediately

and

indefinitely. The money saved during the first year alone will pretty

much

pay for the costs of the Iraqi war.. THEN EVERY YEAR THERE AFTER IT'll

GO TO

OUR SOCIAL SECURITY SYSTEM SO IT WONT GO BROKE IN 20 YEARS.

The American people are no longer going to pour money into third world

Hell

holes and watch those government leaders grow fat on corruption. Need

help

with a famine ? Wrestling with an epidemic? Call France .

In the future, together with Congress, I will work to redirect this

money

toward solving the vexing social problems we still have at home On that

note, a word to terrorist organizations, screw with us and we will hunt

you

down and eliminate you and all y our friends from the face of the earth.

Thirsting for a gutsy country to terrorize? Try France or maybe China .

I am ordering the immediate severing of diplomatic relations with France

,

Germany , and Russia . Thanks for all your help, comrades. We are

retiring

from NATO as well. Bonne chance, mezamies.

I have instructed the Mayor of New York City to begin towing the many UN

diplomatic vehicles located in Manhattan with more than two unpaid

parking

tickets to sites where those vehicles will be stripped, shredded and

crushed. I don't care about whatever treaty pertains to this. You creeps

have tens of thousands of unpaid tickets.

Pay those tickets tomorrow or watch your precious Benzes, Beamers and

limos

be turned over to some of the finest chop shops in the world. I love New

York

A special note to our neighbors. Canada is on List 2. Since we are

likely to

be seeing a lot more of each other, you folks might want to try not

pissing

us off for a change.

Mexico is also on List 2 its president and his entire corrupt government

really need an attitude adjustment. I will have a couple extra thousand

tanks and infantry divisions sitting around. Guess where I am going to

put 'em? Yep, border security.

Oh, by the way, the United States is abrogating the NAFTA treaty -

starting

now.

We are tired of the one-way highway. Immediately, we'll be drilling for

oil

in Alaska- which will take care of this country's oil needs for decades

to

come. If you're an environmentalist who opposes this decision, I refer

you

to List 2 above: pick a country and move there.

It is time for America to focus on its own welfare and its own citizens.

Some will accuse us of isolationism. I answer them by saying, 'darn

tootin.'Nearly a century of trying to help folks live a decent life

around the world has only earned us the undying enmity of just about

everyone on the planet. It is time to eliminate hunger in America It is

time to eliminate homelessness in America . To the nations on List 1, a

final thought. Thank you guys. We owe you and we won't forget.

To the nations on List 2, a final thought: You might want to learn to

speak

Arabic.

God bless America .. Thank you and good night.'

[Cassie 8]

WOULDN'T IT BE GREAT TO TURN ON THE TV AND HEAR ANY U.S.

PRESIDENT,

DEMOCRAT OR REPUBLICAN GIVE THE FOLLOWING SPEECH?

Um, no it wouldn't, because it's utter shite.

Edited April 29, 2008 by Cassie

[Chica Yeyé 41]

I had a deja-vu of Jim Carey giving the speech Edited April 29, 2008 by Len_and_Bren

[Trumplestiltskin 5,791]

Hitler gave better speeches than that.

[trailmix 77]

[Chica Yeyé 41]

And it would finish like so:

[Ban Hammer 12,999]

[Sinergy 3]

I thought it was a funny speach

[Ban Hammer 12,999]

I thought it was a funny speach

me too

[Fandango 1,439]

me three

[Sinergy 3]

[JVKn'CVO 11]

Saludos,

Caro

[Sister Fracas 5]

WOULDN'T IT BE GREAT TO TURN ON THE TV AND HEAR ANY U.S.

PRESIDENT,

DEMOCRAT OR REPUBLICAN GIVE THE FOLLOWING SPEECH?

Um, no it wouldn't, because it's utter shite.

lol