American's view on Islam

[sarahaziz 0]

I found this on the net and it was written by a Muslim man from The middle east discussing marriage between Christians/Muslims. Since I've seen this is a touchy subject among everyone I'm not disclosing the Country this man is from as I hope this to be a clean discussion and not to offend anybody.

"Hello, there is not alot to gettting married in the mosque. There is the nikah(marraige contract) this can be short or long, but it must contain the maher (dowry) and the names of the bride/groom/witnesses. U dont even have to be in the same room, the 2 witnesses will ask if u consent, then tell the person writing the contract that you do and thats it. Now there can be several things in the contract, such as where u will live, if he gives u the right of divorce, etc etc. Just google 'nikah' or 'islamic marriage contract' and it will give u a more detailed explanation. The whole thing takes less than 15 minutes, a short sermon is read and thats it. The best advice indeed is going to speak to the imam.

Now I must point out that he cannot take part in a christian religious ceremony....he should know this,. but (no offense) he doesnt sound exactly like a practicing muslim. BUT he cant do this as it is imitation of another religion, and we are aboslutely forbidden to do this. Also we do not take vows of marriage. Marriage is a contract. We dont say till death do us part, cause we never know, we dont say forsaking all others, cause we can marry more than one...etc etc. Hope all this helps. Peace

PS, some mosques do not allow univited non muslims, I dont think u will have any problem whatsoever. the marriage is generally not conducted in the musalla (prayer area) it is usually done in a adjacent room, which is therefore technically not the mosque. Dont worry.

Ok, I got married to one of my wives at the justice of the peace...courthouse...the problem is they read the standard marriage vows, now it has changed for muslims, alhamdulillah...and u just need 2 witnesses. As for non denominationa;, if there is no religion, then whats the point? I mean are u trying to do something to satisfy family? Just bring them to the mosque marriage. As long as they dress appropriately there should be no problem. I did this In *** and had a *** couple attend that my wife"

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My question to every woman/man in the MENA forum how do you feel about the differences b/t the religons? For women a husband can Swear before God he won't marry more than one but in his heart he knows in the quran it accepts him to marry up to 4 if he actually desired to do that. How do the MENA men and women feel about no vows being presented in the marriage if you married 100% islamically? Does everyone accept the kids to follow Islam because of the quran presents the muslim woman or man with that right? I read the quran recently and sat down with my cousin who is an extremely religious muslim and he explained that if a man was restricted from marriage because he was say handicapped, mentally ill, or a man who didn't have enough money to marry, he never looked at women in his life, remained a virgin until death, etc.. He would receive 40 virgins after death as a reward for remaining clean in life no exactly in a sexually way but if he wanted something in heaven he would have 40 maidens. Also in some cases if a man needs sexual relations with a woman he is allowed to "make a contract" with another woman and accept her as a wife for a short period of time and they are "annulled" afterwards. How does everyone who has converted from another religion or pending on converting feel about the differences?

[sara..... 371]

I found this on the net and it was written by a Muslim man from The middle east discussing marriage between Christians/Muslims. Since I've seen this is a touchy subject among everyone I'm not disclosing the Country this man is from as I hope this to be a clean discussion and not to offend anybody.

"Hello, there is not alot to gettting married in the mosque. There is the nikah(marraige contract) this can be short or long, but it must contain the maher (dowry) and the names of the bride/groom/witnesses. U dont even have to be in the same room, the 2 witnesses will ask if u consent, then tell the person writing the contract that you do and thats it. Now there can be several things in the contract, such as where u will live, if he gives u the right of divorce, etc etc. Just google 'nikah' or 'islamic marriage contract' and it will give u a more detailed explanation. The whole thing takes less than 15 minutes, a short sermon is read and thats it. The best advice indeed is going to speak to the imam.

Now I must point out that he cannot take part in a christian religious ceremony....he should know this,. but (no offense) he doesnt sound exactly like a practicing muslim. BUT he cant do this as it is imitation of another religion, and we are aboslutely forbidden to do this. Also we do not take vows of marriage. Marriage is a contract. We dont say till death do us part, cause we never know, we dont say forsaking all others, cause we can marry more than one...etc etc. Hope all this helps. Peace

PS, some mosques do not allow univited non muslims, I dont think u will have any problem whatsoever. the marriage is generally not conducted in the musalla (prayer area) it is usually done in a adjacent room, which is therefore technically not the mosque. Dont worry.

Ok, I got married to one of my wives at the justice of the peace...courthouse...the problem is they read the standard marriage vows, now it has changed for muslims, alhamdulillah...and u just need 2 witnesses. As for non denominationa;, if there is no religion, then whats the point? I mean are u trying to do something to satisfy family? Just bring them to the mosque marriage. As long as they dress appropriately there should be no problem. I did this In *** and had a *** couple attend that my wife"

................................................................................

................................................................

My question to every woman/man in the MENA forum how do you feel about the differences b/t the religons? For women a husband can Swear before God he won't marry more than one but in his heart he knows in the quran it accepts him to marry up to 4 if he actually desired to do that. How do the MENA men and women feel about no vows being presented in the marriage if you married 100% islamically? Does everyone accept the kids to follow Islam because of the quran presents the muslim woman or man with that right? I read the quran recently and sat down with my cousin who is an extremely religious muslim and he explained that if a man was restricted from marriage because he was say handicapped, mentally ill, or a man who didn't have enough money to marry, he never looked at women in his life, remained a virgin until death, etc.. He would receive 40 virgins after death as a reward for remaining clean in life no exactly in a sexually way but if he wanted something in heaven he would have 40 maidens. Also in some cases if a man needs sexual relations with a woman he is allowed to "make a contract" with another woman and accept her as a wife for a short period of time and they are "annulled" afterwards. How does everyone who has converted from another religion or pending on converting feel about the differences?

Oh God i was not going to reply to this but i feel i must i sure hope it dont start a verbal war on the boards.........first Islam does NOT allow temporary marriage in normal cases.... I wont get into the part of were to find it because it would only start a war here........second Islam does allow more than one marraige but only for very limited reasons it does not mean that a man can just go out and get married because he wants another wife...........also if the first wife puts in the contract that she will not allow him another wife guess what that option is closed........really this topic has a lot of issues that have not been addressed and i really feel that it is best left alone but i just could not go by and not say anything.....

I hope i have not offended you and i didnt say it in a mean way just for information only to add to what was posted

sara

[sarahaziz 0]

Feel free to express opinions

It's a clean post and islam can be viewed in 485043985 lights. Alot of muslims expressed all what I wrote so I just wanted to know what people thought about this point of view.

[Jen C 2008 0]

It is also in the marriage contract that if a Muslim is marrying a woman of Christian or Jewish faith she will be allowed to continue to practice her religion. It is interesting that a woman marrying a muslim man is not required to convert, but if a man wishes to marry a muslim woman he must convert to Islam.

What's also interesting here is that many woman just throw their convictions out the door and convert simply because they are expected to(or want to please their man) without even fully understanding the religion. This is not a game, this is your life! If you are Christian, how can you give up your savior for a man? By the same token, i know Muslim men who have married athiests, how is this even possible???????? so many contradictions !

This will be an interesting discussion, but realise you have opened a can of worms, also!

[sarahaziz 0]

yeah I realize its opened that can of worms lol But its important because everyone with difference in religion will be opened to this subject with their spouses. Muslim men are Muslim men Muslim women are muslim women you know? I think its a good subject to review cuz its going to come out in the open sooner or later

[~Jackie~ 30]

wake me when its over

[Sofiyya 1,687]

I married a Christian man without his conversion. It is done; we did so in Lebanon, and it is done more often in the west. It's not openly discussed (dirty laundry!), but it is done.

As for marrying more than one wife, practices involved with that have little to do with Islam and more with local tradition. Temporary marriage is done in Shia Islam, and forbidden in Sunni Islam, although some are trying to make urfi/misyar acceptable in Sunni Islam. It was denied by the Prophet.

[Jen C 2008 0]

Ok, forgive my confusion! just wanting to understand this. For those of you that married in Morocco, did your husband's family believe this was a sign that you were converting to Islam? or did they believe you had accepted Islam by thwe act of marrying a Muslim in his country?

[desert_fox 32]

....... Also in some cases if a man needs sexual relations with a woman he is allowed to "make a contract" with another woman and accept her as a wife for a short period of time and they are "annulled" afterwards. How does everyone who has converted from another religion or pending on converting feel about the differences?

Hey...I like this part....can I do it all in one night..from contract to annulment??? I can convert for an evening...no prob

[morocco4ever 63]

I married a Christian man without his conversion. It is done; we did so in Lebanon, and it is done more often in the west. It's not openly discussed (dirty laundry!), but it is done.

As for marrying more than one wife, practices involved with that have little to do with Islam and more with local tradition. Temporary marriage is done in Shia Islam, and forbidden in Sunni Islam, although some are trying to make urfi/misyar acceptable in Sunni Islam. It was denied by the Prophet.

This is exactly what my husband told me.

To the OP, what religion are you and your fiance?

[Sofiyya 1,687]

First thing that must be understood - there is no single nikah contract, no single nikah ceremony, no single contract or marriage law for the worldwide Muslim community. There is at least one country, I think it's Singapore, that will not allow Muslims to marry non-Muslims at all; women must convert to Islam. Sudan, for sure, and Turkey (things are in flux there) allow Muslim women to marry ahl al kitab. In some places, any changes or additions to the contract, if allowed, must comply with the local interpretation of sharia. What is allowed can even vary by region within one country. It is incorrect to apply one understanding of the law to the entire Muslim world, nor to assume you have or do not have a particular right or prohibition in your contract.

[Donna A 4]

my husband is muslim, i am christian. it works for us.

if my husband wants another wife, he knows im gone. God created one man and one woman and thats the way He wanted it. He is not wishy washy and change his mind later. end of story.

[brnidokiegurl 0]

Ok, forgive my confusion! just wanting to understand this. For those of you that married in Morocco, did your husband's family believe this was a sign that you were converting to Islam? or did they believe you had accepted Islam by thwe act of marrying a Muslim in his country?

u are ask if you want to , when u go to marry you are required to show a religion paper for yourself in order to get all the papers but if and when you say no there is no more talk of it, they do ask of the dowry, and they do ask of the conditions that may have been decided

[sandinista! 1,816]

my husband is muslim, i am christian. it works for us.

if my husband wants another wife, he knows im gone. God created one man and one woman and thats the way He wanted it. He is not wishy washy and change his mind later. end of story.

which "he" are you referring to as not being "wishy washy" or "changing his mind later?" i'm unaware of any biblical injunction prohibiting polygamous marriage. it's practiced by christians throughout africa and in a few places in asia.

[doodlebugg 10]

I don't understand what the overall question of this thread is?