Not Living Together After I Arrive

[goose182 0]

Hi All,

Some background: Married to my wife (she's the USC) in October 2006 (so less than 2 years). I've filled out and submitted both the I-129f and the I-130 applications and they are currently being processed at the CSC.

On to the reason for this topic: After I arrive on my K3 visa, is there any policy that says that I must live with my wife in the US for the duration of my stay in order to retain my visa status?

It seems odd I'm sure, but we want to transition slowly into living together after such a long time apart by starting with just being in the same city and...well...dating each other again I guess you could say. She has a full time job and does 60 hours of coursework/class getting her masters on top of that and isn't sure that she can deal with the stress of me just immediately moving in to her house after such a long separation. We miss each other very much of course, but we don't want to rush into this as it's a very big step. We have lived together before briefly, but it seems like so long ago that we want to ease back into it...

So I was wondering if I'd send up any red flags if I was to rent an apartment for the first 6 months of my stay on my K3? Is there any policy that says that we must reside at the same address for the entire time or risk termination of my visa?

Thanks for any help you can provide.

Mike

Edited January 29, 2008 by goose182

[Converse34 1]

I would think this would most definitely throw up red flags. If you came over on a fiance visa, you could prob justify not living together before you got married. But now that you are married, it would seem suspicious, IMHO.

[Elbereth 0]

why did you marry then?

we sure have some weird couples over here

anyway, i guess if you give her address as your own for all effects, who'd know if you are living there or not?

[samandfemi 0]

I agree. Definately suspicous. If you have reservations, then why did you get married?

No disrespect, but it's like putting the cart before the horse.

[Converse34 1]

why did you marry then?

we sure have some weird couples over here

anyway, i guess if you give her address as your own for all effects, who'd know if you are living there or not?

Yes, if you do live separately, you would have to use her address for everything. But at some point, on your AOS forms or at an interview, you would have to lie, which is never good.

[Otto 83]

Giant

[Mel and Syl 0]

Hi All,

Some background: Married to my wife (she's the USC) in October 2006 (so less than 2 years). I've filled out and submitted both the I-129f and the I-130 applications and they are currently being processed at the CSC.

On to the reason for this topic: After I arrive on my K3 visa, is there any policy that says that I must live with my wife in the US for the duration of my stay in order to retain my visa status?

It seems odd I'm sure, but we want to transition slowly into living together after such a long time apart by starting with just being in the same city and...well...dating each other again I guess you could say. She has a full time job and does 60 hours of coursework/class getting her masters on top of that and isn't sure that she can deal with the stress of me just immediately moving in to her house after such a long separation. We miss each other very much of course, but we don't want to rush into this as it's a very big step. We have lived together before briefly, but it seems like so long ago that we want to ease back into it...

So I was wondering if I'd send up any red flags if I was to rent an apartment for the first 6 months of my stay on my K3? Is there any policy that says that we must reside at the same address for the entire time or risk termination of my visa?

Thanks for any help you can provide.

Mike

hmm... i am sorry but is it not what you were supposed to do befor you got married?

How do you want people to believe that the marriage is not fake by living appart? I mean how you guys can be missing each other that much and still wouldn't want to leave together. I sure dont want to judge anybody but the whole thing sounds weired to me but i still wish you good luck!

[JenT 0]

...we sure have some weird couples over here...

This judgment was unnecessary. Every couple has to define what their marriage relationship is going to be.... just because you have one way of looking at things does not make it the right way, or the only way...

I personally applaud the OP for considering his wife's feelings and lifestyle... perhaps easing into being together full time is the best way for them to ensure a successful start. How can anyone here judge that, or question why he got married in the first place? All he was asking was whether it would raise any red flags....

Yes, it might. But they can be mitigated and the situation can be explained.... especially if living apart is only temporary. The use of a single address for all correspondence is definitely something I would advise.

How many couples on here have reported the dissolution of their relationship because the lifestyle change was too abrupt and they could not adjust? At least the OP is considering this.

VJ sheesh.

[Converse34 1]

Hi All,

Some background: Married to my wife (she's the USC) in October 2006 (so less than 2 years). I've filled out and submitted both the I-129f and the I-130 applications and they are currently being processed at the CSC.

It seems odd I'm sure, but we want to transition slowly into living together after such a long time apart by starting with just being in the same city and...well...dating each other again I guess you could say.

How many times have you visited each other between 10/06 and present? I'm sure it would help if you had proof and can demonstrate the length of your visits.

[goose182 0]

why did you marry then?

we sure have some weird couples over here

anyway, i guess if you give her address as your own for all effects, who'd know if you are living there or not?

We married because we're in love. Weird to be cautious?? I think couples are weird not to be cautious when it comes to something as important as the success of their marriage.

I agree. Definately suspicous. If you have reservations, then why did you get married?

No disrespect, but it's like putting the cart before the horse.

Sigh...we got married because we love each other. We have reservations about living together straight away because we're human and cutting through this immigration red tape and being apart for so long has been a trying experience for both of us. There have been ups and downs but we want to make it work and we thought that maybe a small transition period would help us avoid any undue stress.

Yes, if you do live separately, you would have to use her address for everything. But at some point, on your AOS forms or at an interview, you would have to lie, which is never good.

Thanks for your responses, I'm not willing to lie on my AOS or at an interview, but if I was in the US for 2 years would they actually want proof of us living together for the entire time or would say the last 18 months suffice?

hmm... i am sorry but is it not what you were supposed to do befor you got married?

How do you want people to believe that the marriage is not fake by living appart? I mean how you guys can be missing each other that much and still wouldn't want to leave together. I sure dont want to judge anybody but the whole thing sounds weired to me but i still wish you good luck!

I really wasn't submitting my questions to be given advice on my relationship...moreso on my VISA...hence posting on VISAjourney.com!

[Dias Melhores 0]

Major red flag.

Edited January 29, 2008 by Dias Melhores

[goose182 0]

...we sure have some weird couples over here...

This judgment was unnecessary. Every couple has to define what their marriage relationship is going to be.... just because you have one way of looking at things does not make it the right way, or the only way...

I personally applaud the OP for considering his wife's feelings and lifestyle... perhaps easing into being together full time is the best way for them to ensure a successful start. How can anyone here judge that, or question why he got married in the first place? All he was asking was whether it would raise any red flags....

Yes, it might. But they can be mitigated and the situation can be explained.... especially if living apart is only temporary. The use of a single address for all correspondence is definitely something I would advise.

How many couples on here have reported the dissolution of their relationship because the lifestyle change was too abrupt and they could not adjust? At least the OP is considering this.

VJ sheesh.

Thank you!! It would certainly be a temporary situation as you mentioned.

How many times have you visited each other between 10/06 and present? I'm sure it would help if you had proof and can demonstrate the length of your visits.

I'm living in the UK and she's in Arizona so it's been quite costly to get together, but nonetheless I've made 5 trips to see her over the last year and a bit - the most recent one for 5 weeks over Christmas. She's come out to London to visit me once as well.

[frustrated1 0]

sorry to be judgemental, but this situation is a red flag all around.

as to your question about "is there any policy that says that I must live with my wife...", see the definition of the word 'marriage' on wikipedia, a dictionary or something similar. the meaning is inherent in the word and does not require US immigration interpretation.

[goose182 0]

sorry to be judgemental, but this situation is a red flag all around.

as to your question about "is there any policy that says that I must live with my wife...", see the definition of the word 'marriage' on wikipedia, a dictionary or something similar. the meaning is inherent in the word and does not require US immigration interpretation.

Marriage or wedlock is an interpersonal relationship (usually intimate and sexual) with governmental, social, or religious recognition.

I don't see "must occupy the same physical space" anywhere in that definition, but obviously what you're implying is that a marriage can only exist when two people live together. But I'm married now and we're thousands of miles away from one another...how does that factor in? What if, because of work, I had to live separately from my spouse for a few months out of the year...would that immediately nullify our marriage? What if a family member got sick and I had to go home for several months...same thing?

In my experience, everything is open to the interpretation of US Immigration.

Edited January 29, 2008 by goose182

[C and J 1]

It is definitely a red flag.

However, this is a quote I came across, which may help your situation:-

Examiners usually want to see persuasive documentary evidence that the couple has been living together since getting married (or they have a very good reason for living apart), and that they have commingled their financial affairs.

Whether USCIS will see "taking things slowly" as a "very good reason for living apart" would be up to the interviewing officer.

If you think you can sufficiently prove the co-mingling of finances etc without living together then, yes, it is possible. If you are intending to have completely separate lives, other than "dating", that will be an issue for you.

It seems to me that if this was the route you were planning to take, a fiance visa would have been the better option as it allows for this.