Interracial marriages surge across U.S.

[Teacher Mark 53]

You look like you're tall, so they really can't help themselves. I'm 6", so I towered above the majority of the people as well. When we went to the market I felt like a circus side show.

Chinese aren't as short as a lot of other Asians. I'm about 5'10", taller than the average Chinese guy, but not really a giant. My fiancee's father is nearly the same height as me.

I also had a funny experience at a market near her home. Now since this was a small market in a residential area, I can understand that there hadn't been many foreigners there before. I'm even willing to accept that I was the first foreigner to set foot in the place. We walked by a booth on the way out, and the guy working there was staring at me, wide eyed, with his mouth hanging open, as if I had three heads or something. Maybe I was the first foreigner he'd ever seen in person, but from the way he was staring, you'd think he didn't even know foreigners existed before he saw me.

I was the first whitey around my Wife's hometown since the war according to several people there, so I can relate with that as well. There was one little girl that freaked out every time she saw me.

[NancyB 0]

Well I experienced something that really hurt me.

My kids (they're twins) are from a previous relationship and they are 3 years old. Thier father is half Puerto Rican. And if you didn't know, Puerto Ricans are US Citizens anyway.

Basically, I had a picture of my kids hanging up at work and one of my co-workers said "whose kids are these? we dont have any mexicans working here." and started laughing. I almost got fired for what I said to that person. Fortunately my manager saw my side of things.

Other times, people ask me if I'm babysitting or if my kids are half black. If they were, would it matter????

Why is it so important to distinguish WHAT they are. They're kids. They're American kids.

It's very disheartening and it's sad that people are so narrow-minded.

Your children are human beings! They are cute, and we are the future, lol! Where has this person been? under a dark rock? LOL!

America has never been a "one, pure race" society. It's funny when people think this. Sorry for them! Don't be disheartening be happy that she is not a part of your family, lol!

[panterchen 1]

It's actually sad to read these stories. I mean are we still living in the 12th century or what??

We are a German-American couple, both white, and nevertheless we had to listen to bulls*** like that. My family thought he was just after our money (I mean, c'mon he is not poor; now they love him though) and work colleagues of his dad asked him if we were only getting married for sex (#######, I don't need to marry for that) or if I even spoke English (how else would we communicate?).

I hurts to see people being so uneducated about different cultures. Sometimes I wonder if these people have ever experienced love in their lives.

[Uncle Wally 2]

The only person who's given us any ####### (me: white, wife: Japanese) has been my wife's old granny. My wife is from the backwaters of Japan (where I lived for some years and we met), and her parents and siblings love me, despite never having met a foreigner before me. But old Granny isn't having any of it. She won't even eat at the same table with me. I used to make an effort with Granny, following Japanese social protocols such as bringing Granny souvenirs from places I'd been. But when Granny made it clear to me that she wouldn't even touch let alone eat the peaches I brought her when I returned from a region in Japan where peaches are 'famous' because the dirty foreign barbarian had tainted them, I decided Granny can fall in the mud for all I care. #### Granny, the old hag.

I think Granny is mad because when she was a young woman her house was next to an oil well that the Americans targeted the day before the surrender, and was actually the last target of the last bombing raid of the war. Look it up. One of the bombs missed, and her first husband got blown to itty-bitty bits. Worked out fine for me, I suppose, as my wife wouldn't exist if Granny hadn't had to get married a second time. But it's not like I dropped the f*ckin' thing on her house. Old bag. Here's a peach, Granny- choke on it.

[wifetobe 2]

Speaking as a Greek woman with a Black man. The only negativity I get for being with my man is generally from Black women everywhere no matter where we are. I agree with Jomo's Girl. The 'Black and Greek' relation thing is very common here in North London, UK, and it is viewed like this from many Black women whom I have heard come from their own mouth. As long as the white female is "exceptionally good looking" then we don't have a problem with them being with our brothers." What is good looking? The problem will never dissolve itself as long as racism exists which will probably always will. Racism is apart of the furniture unfortunately and can go on and on in topics for a few more to come. I hope one day racism will become truly extinct but that's just me.

[Kevin&Leilei 1]

Speaking as a Greek woman with a Black man. The only negativity I get for being with my man is generally from Black women everywhere no matter where we are. I agree with Jomo's Girl. The 'Black and Greek' relation thing is very common here in North London, UK, and it is viewed like this from many Black women whom I have heard come from their own mouth. As long as the white female is "exceptionally good looking" then we don't have a problem with them being with our brothers." What is good looking? The problem will never dissolve itself as long as racism exists which will probably always will. Racism is apart of the furniture unfortunately and can go on and on in topics for a few more to come. I hope one day racism will become truly extinct but that's just me.

IMO, racism will exist until the entire world's population has intermingled such that there are no more races, which will take several thousand years. Then people will just hate each other for other reasons, like differing beliefs.

[sachinky 464]

My husband (then boyfriend) had no problems in a sleepy collegetown in upstate NY where everyone minds their own goddamned business. The Indians there would stare a little longer than necessary but it wasn't bad. He was here in Calcutta two months ago for a couple of weeks, and while there was some pointed staring, it wasn't anything we couldn't handle. It was to be expected -- he towers over six feet and while Indians have seen whites and blacks I doubt they've seen too many freckled redheads. Think the Weasley twins from Harry Potter. My parents, cousins and friends love him and gush continuously about how tall and good-looking he is. So yeah, we've never had to face any adverse situations. I even felt bold enough to hold hands with him in the mall (we have this bad habit of holding hands and then swinging our arms proudly like we're marching) and we even kissed in the movie theater. Several times. Some people smiled or tsked tsked. Hee hee. We were being scandalous.

Oh, I miss him.

[trinket 30]

One cashier at our local grocery store asked me if my husband was my "meal ticket". Well he got a nice lecture from yours truly. When later that day I told my husband about the incident, he thought I should have complained to the manager.

We are inter-racial couple and don't really get much stares, people do think of me either as African American or Mexican, I always have a good laugh about it, even when we went to the Indian restaurant in the town, the Indian waiter out there thought of me as African American for some reason, even though my husband thought I was so fluent with the menu order.

Back in India, we did get stares but only the curious ones and yes once in a while someone would come up to me and ask if I am Indian or foreigner.

But all and all the city we live in is very friendly, I go to all white tavern and no one stares. I really feel very welcomed out here.

ETA-- The only racism I felt was from fellow Indians out here, for some reason as soon as they see me with my white husband they cut corners.

Edited October 26, 2009 by trinket

[ms_jinga_lala 0]

My mom freaked out when I told her I was going to India to meet a man I loved. Of course, she had a lot of wrong ideas about India. I enlightened her. Since my family is barely existent in my life she knew there was no way she was going to change my stubborn mind about the trip, the marriage or anything. She is getting better but I expect her to have a hard time adjusting. My dad who has always made it clear he does not believe in any sort of race mixing was all too happy to accept my relationship. (Of course his best friend for 30+ years was Indian and immigrated here just before they met.) My friends are all very excited and ask about my fiancee almost every day, my kids and my niece just love my fiancee already and talk about him a lot and their plans for when he gets here....makes me wonder where I fit in lol.

In India we got so many stares, some people laughed which pissed off my fiancee. Many people were curious. My fiancee got a little upset, but I honestly didn't even care or notice too much, I had my mind on happiness and enjoying my experience. I don't let people get to me too easily anyway. When he gets here, we may get some stares and some snubbing, but I don't care. I don't have time for racist idiots. And in my opinion that is what racists are in the U.S. There are not many true Americans left (Native Americans) and about 95% of this country is already a mutt of some sort. They need to just get over themselves. I guarantee there is at least some race mixing in their family at some point and just because two people are of the same skin color doesn't make it less racist. (I've researched family history....with all the Native American massacres and slave trading in our countries history....I can assure you there was race mixing going on...it was about survival as well as control which will all know tend to both be basic human instincts.) My head will always be high because I am with someone who provides more love and care than I could ever need. I am a princess....at least in the eyes of one person...therefore...I rule....and so do all of you....you are someone's prince or princess and no one has the right to make you feel like anything less.

[sachinky 464]

In my four years in the U.S., I can't even remember how many times I was asked if I were Mexican. "Habla espanol?" While waiting at Port Authority one man was insistent that I was Jamaican and that I should have a drink with him no matter how many times I replied to the contrary.

I do have to agree with you, Trinket. I feel a lot more "judging" and staring from fellow Indians (in the U.S.) because of my white (then) boyfriend. I don't know if I'd say it was racist, but more of a "Look at her selling out with a white boy" thingie. Bizarre. In India, it was more curiousity than anything else. No one came up or asked us anything about it though. I'd like to think people in Calcutta are quite open-minded.

[Beauty for Ashes 257]

In my four years in the U.S., I can't even remember how many times I was asked if I were Mexican. "Habla espanol?" While waiting at Port Authority one man was insistent that I was Jamaican and that I should have a drink with him no matter how many times I replied to the contrary.

I do have to agree with you, Trinket. I feel a lot more "judging" and staring from fellow Indians (in the U.S.) because of my white (then) boyfriend. I don't know if I'd say it was racist, but more of a "Look at her selling out with a white boy" thingie. Bizarre. In India, it was more curiousity than anything else. No one came up or asked us anything about it though. I'd like to think people in Calcutta are quite open-minded.

I think it has alot to do with where you live. I just had a customer who was Indian of Guyanese origin and she was married to a white guy and no one has ever given her a bit of grief or stared at her. We live in extremely multicultural Florida and people kind of just blend. The more people intermarried and more people fluctuating through a community, the more open they will be

[edmon59 0]

I think it has alot to do with where you live. I just had a customer who was Indian of Guyanese origin and she was married to a white guy and no one has ever given her a bit of grief or stared at her. We live in extremely multicultural Florida and people kind of just blend. The more people intermarried and more people fluctuating through a community, the more open they will be

As a white guy married to a black jamaican I've had my share of looks and comments-----not so much in the US, but definitely in Jamaica. Usually it was from men asking why she was with a "white bway" and not a jamaican man. I also got a lot of "is she a hooker?" questions. I figure it goes with the territory and move on.

We ALWAYS get detained at airports, though, and I've learned to expect it and get there early....

-Ed

[ms_jinga_lala 0]

In my four years in the U.S., I can't even remember how many times I was asked if I were Mexican. "Habla espanol?" While waiting at Port Authority one man was insistent that I was Jamaican and that I should have a drink with him no matter how many times I replied to the contrary.

I do have to agree with you, Trinket. I feel a lot more "judging" and staring from fellow Indians (in the U.S.) because of my white (then) boyfriend. I don't know if I'd say it was racist, but more of a "Look at her selling out with a white boy" thingie. Bizarre. In India, it was more curiousity than anything else. No one came up or asked us anything about it though. I'd like to think people in Calcutta are quite open-minded.

I haven't experienced this in the US yet but I'm almost a freaking celebrity in my fiancee's circle in India lol. Not too many people looked at him funny because he was with a white girl. We met everyone he knew and walked the streets. We got stares but his whole family was very accepting and his friends all ask about me and talk about me. I was a bit surprised about how well accepted I was there, but that could have been because I was really only around his friends. When out and about together we got a few strange stares and some laughs that upset him, but mostly we didn't see any of that.

Funny how the Indians here would stare at you more. I can't help but think how so many Indian men go back to India to find a bride and there are news stories about how they feel American Indian women are too Americanized and prefer Indian women. So if they feel like Indian women are so much better than American women, why would they look at you and your husband funny lol. After all...he did what they think is best - go to India for a bride....... Looks to me like they would be on his side.

Edited December 19, 2009 by ms_jinga_lala

[trinket 30]

In my four years in the U.S., I can't even remember how many times I was asked if I were Mexican. "Habla espanol?" While waiting at Port Authority one man was insistent that I was Jamaican and that I should have a drink with him no matter how many times I replied to the contrary.

I do have to agree with you, Trinket. I feel a lot more "judging" and staring from fellow Indians (in the U.S.) because of my white (then) boyfriend. I don't know if I'd say it was racist, but more of a "Look at her selling out with a white boy" thingie. Bizarre. In India, it was more curiousity than anything else. No one came up or asked us anything about it though. I'd like to think people in Calcutta are quite open-minded.

I haven't experienced this in the US yet but I'm almost a freaking celebrity in my fiancee's circle in India lol. Not too many people looked at him funny because he was with a white girl. We met everyone he knew and walked the streets. We got stares but his whole family was very accepting and his friends all ask about me and talk about me. I was a bit surprised about how well accepted I was there, but that could have been because I was really only around his friends. When out and about together we got a few strange stares and some laughs that upset him, but mostly we didn't see any of that.

Funny how the Indians here would stare at you more. I can't help but think how so many Indian men go back to India to find a bride and there are news stories about how they feel American Indian women are too Americanized and prefer Indian women. So if they feel like Indian women are so much better than American women, why would they look at you and your husband funny lol. After all...he did what they think is best - go to India for a bride....... Looks to me like they would be on his side.

Oh no! don't you know the Indian women who marry white/black/yellow guys are worse than westernized Indian women living in West??? The ones who marry anyone other than Indian is apparently have sold their culture, they are too forward, oh and may I say they are total slvts because you know a white guy is only about drinking and partying .

Now I wonder when my partying husband is ever going to take me out to party. I feel cheated dammit

[sachinky 464]

Well--he didn't exactly come to India for a bride. I was already there and maybe because I was in the U.S. for four years they (other Indians in the U.S.) thought I was already a corrupted, Westernized Indian. I mean, I must be right--shamelessly kissing at the bus-stop. Not exactly pure, virginal, good Indian girl material. Maybe there's a vibe we give off? Haha.

It wasn't directed at him per se, just a few pointed stares or a few double-takes when they'd see us holding hands and such. Sort of like "oh, I bet the Indian boys aren't good enough for her--look at her selling out with a white boy!"

It was very few and far inbetween though--so not an issue, really.

Edited December 21, 2009 by sachinky