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spearmint

What should i do?

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Hi... i am kinda bit confused right now, because my best friend's wife ( he is more like my little bro, nothing else, he was my bro best buddy and we still keep in touch eventhough my bro been passed away long time ago & he is not living in USA ). So 2 days ago his wife added me on my Blackberry Messenger ( BBM ) Here's a short story about. Me and his wife were never met in person because i already in USA, but we did chat few times before they got married.

Since they got married, she never chat / email with me. Please note : she is already know that me and her husband is like bro and sis because her husband is same age with my bro.

Then i have no idea but i can feel something is not right, when her husband did FaceTime with me and his wife was there too, so i said hi to her, then she looked at the camera and just like that, didn't say anything even not smile. I feel weird.

Honestly i feel kinda mad too because of her manner. It wasn't just 1x but long time when she had miscarriage, her husband facetime with me to tell the sad news so i said that i am sorry for what happened but she even didn't talk with me ( that time i understood maybe she didn't feel too talk, but i noticed on the background she did something and looks just happy, not sad at all. I was shocked though but didn't say anything)

So when 2 days ago she added me on BBM, i accept the invite but after she didn't say anything even a simple Hi sis to me & i didn't want to write to her first after what she did the last time.

Until today she haven't write me anything,just like usual people add some friends will says something Hi or whatever.

Actually i don't feel to like her as much as before especially after what she told me about her mom in law whom is close with me and just like my mom / auntie for me. I think this woman has a problem & no manner.

I want to remove her from my contact list but i am thinking about my bro. I don't want make a not nice situation if i delete his wife contact. but honestly i don't want to her to be on my contact list especially if she never ever want to make any conversation with me at all, so what was the purpose added me?

So anyone can give me some advice maybe? should i just let it be there / should i just remove her? I don't like being fake to like someone that i don't feel to like. Even after that time, i never mentioned her anymore while i talked with my bro, because i don't feel to do / asking for someone who didn't want to talk witih me, just look at the camera and give a shitty looking face and go away.

Thank you

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He's not your brother, and chances are he doesn't think of you as his sister. She probably knows this and is why you got the cold shoulder from her. She probably doesn't trust her husband, and why she has added you as a friend so she can keep an eye on him as much as possible.

One thing I do want to say, is that if my husband got on face time with someone to tell them about MY miscarriage I'd be livid. She probably wasn't ready for that news to be out and you not being family would of hurt even more.


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He's not your brother, and chances are he doesn't think of you as his sister. She probably knows this and is why you got the cold shoulder from her. She probably doesn't trust her husband, and why she has added you as a friend so she can keep an eye on him as much as possible.

One thing I do want to say, is that if my husband got on face time with someone to tell them about MY miscarriage I'd be livid. She probably wasn't ready for that news to be out and you not being family would of hurt even more.

Let me make it clear here, about the bro sister thingy, i knew we are not bro sis from bloodline but we've known for many years and i know all of his family & wife know too about it & i can said it about bro sis because we calling each other with bro and sister thingy not by names so you wrote if he doesn't think of me as his sister, i can say i am not agree with you.

And about miscarriage, it was on her FB and other social media already before we did the facetime.

If you said she added me so she can keep an eye on him, hmm i mean from which side? If she want to do that, she can just check from her husband's phone because added me on BBM won't do nothing, if she is worries if something going on between me and her husband, it won't be appears by her added me as friend because she won't sees a thing, it just like Yahoo Messenger, it's not like FB that you can read everything what's it already there.

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I'm sure that is how you feel about him. You said yourself you have never met her, so I don't think she would feel the same.

I don't use bbm so no clue how that works. It's possible she is trying to get to know you but you asked for opinions and that is mine.


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Citizenship for older 2 boys

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NOA/fee waiver 03/19/2014

Biometrics 04/15/14

Interview 05/29/14

In line for Oath 06/20/14

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I'm sure that is how you feel about him. You said yourself you have never met her, so I don't think she would feel the same.

I don't use bbm so no clue how that works. It's possible she is trying to get to know you but you asked for opinions and that is mine.

yes never met but before they got married, we emailed, chat on YM and even did some facetime together with him too and was ok until they got married more less chat etc. If she thinks something going on between me and her husband, well her loss then, after got to know me online and in all sudden gave a cold treatment.

BBM is just like a YM, you added someone to chat

Thanks for the opinion tho

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Does it matter? Delete her if you want. If he asks just say, "Dude she never said anything to me so I deleted her. Is it that big of a deal?" Really, you're making a mountain out of a mole hill.

hahahha i like that. I can delete her anytime even not accepted it, but i just respect her husband, but i think i'll do that what you said, because that's the truth

Thanks NLR

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Hi... i am kinda bit confused right now, because my best friend's wife ( he is more like my little bro, nothing else, he was my bro best buddy and we still keep in touch eventhough my bro been passed away long time ago & he is not living in USA ). So 2 days ago his wife added me on my Blackberry Messenger ( BBM ) Here's a short story about. Me and his wife were never met in person because i already in USA, but we did chat few times before they got married.

Since they got married, she never chat / email with me. Please note : she is already know that me and her husband is like bro and sis because her husband is same age with my bro.

Then i have no idea but i can feel something is not right, when her husband did FaceTime with me and his wife was there too, so i said hi to her, then she looked at the camera and just like that, didn't say anything even not smile. I feel weird.

Honestly i feel kinda mad too because of her manner. It wasn't just 1x but long time when she had miscarriage, her husband facetime with me to tell the sad news so i said that i am sorry for what happened but she even didn't talk with me ( that time i understood maybe she didn't feel too talk, but i noticed on the background she did something and looks just happy, not sad at all. I was shocked though but didn't say anything)

So when 2 days ago she added me on BBM, i accept the invite but after she didn't say anything even a simple Hi sis to me & i didn't want to write to her first after what she did the last time.

Until today she haven't write me anything,just like usual people add some friends will says something Hi or whatever.

Actually i don't feel to like her as much as before especially after what she told me about her mom in law whom is close with me and just like my mom / auntie for me. I think this woman has a problem & no manner.

I want to remove her from my contact list but i am thinking about my bro. I don't want make a not nice situation if i delete his wife contact. but honestly i don't want to her to be on my contact list especially if she never ever want to make any conversation with me at all, so what was the purpose added me?

So anyone can give me some advice maybe? should i just let it be there / should i just remove her? I don't like being fake to like someone that i don't feel to like. Even after that time, i never mentioned her anymore while i talked with my bro, because i don't feel to do / asking for someone who didn't want to talk witih me, just look at the camera and give a shitty looking face and go away.

Thank you

I would say just leave it like that don't delete her ....ignore her behavior and maintain your bro an sis relationship.

I have a very close friend he live in New York and calls me his big sister...anytime I visit NY I called him up and he hang out for a few hours with me and my hubby, I have his girlfriend on my Facebook and she knows about him and I being very close and she saw many time I commented on his sister pics and we referred to each other as sister and his mom I would called her mommy, and not one day she ever say HI to me and anything at all and I just leave it like that.

May times I would post on his Facebook and say "Hi my brother please call me I need to talk with you and ask for a favor". lol

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I would say just leave it like that don't delete her ....ignore her behavior and maintain your bro an sis relationship.

I have a very close friend he live in New York and calls me his big sister...anytime I visit NY I called him up and he hang out for a few hours with me and my hubby, I have his girlfriend on my Facebook and she knows about him and I being very close and she saw many time I commented on his sister pics and we referred to each other as sister and his mom I would called her mommy, and not one day she ever say HI to me and anything at all and I just leave it like that.

May times I would post on his Facebook and say "Hi my brother please call me I need to talk with you and ask for a favor". lol

hi Sharda, thanks for the suggestion. so you've same situation too like i do :) Yeah so far i still let her there on my contact list to see what's going on, who knows she will send me a little message :)

I jjust remembered last year she sent me an email asked me something about craft and i replied her. Oh one thing, when they got married, i congrats them and sent her a special email to her too but she even didn't bothered to reply me back say thank you, i was shocked at that time.

Some people are just rude with no manner sometimes.

Edited by spearmint

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oh ! you are female !

well, maybe since the miscarriage, she's really sensitive about her husband's female friends?


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yes never met but before they got married, we emailed, chat on YM and even did some facetime together with him too and was ok until they got married more less chat etc. If she thinks something going on between me and her husband, well her loss then, after got to know me online and in all sudden gave a cold treatment.

BBM is just like a YM, you added someone to chat

Thanks for the opinion tho

I know this might seem a silly thing to say, but why not ask her if there is a problem between the two of you? Maybe just a 1-on-1 facetime to clear the air. As as been speculated that the issue may not be you directly, but how her husband (and his family) view you.

I know I would feel put out if my wife and her family were constantly talking about a male friend all the time and sharing everything of our lives with him.

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