BethandBilly

ONE person, the OP, is having trouble getting benefits. ONE person on an anonymous message board does not reflect the way the real world works. In the real world, people who work at human service agencies are not awarded or rewarded for failing to approve applicants.
Again, your assertion is a LIE.
Information about benefits in California is available on the internet, right here:
http://www.cdss.ca.gov/cdssweb/pg54.htm#families
To say it's kept from the public like it's some big secret is another lie. Every single bit of policy about public money used for public benefits comes from federal and state legislation, all of which is freely available online.
I understand you've made a career out of manipulating the government to get benefits, thus your adversarial position, but the reality is most people don't do that.

MY POINT which is and always has been that you have and continue to pass off purposefully incorrect information as truths, which is nothing like "shutting down" information. There's an internet and this isn't the only source of information about anything available to anyone.
I REPEAT, one more time, employees who work in public service agencies are not awarded/rewarded for deliberately disqualifying potential beneficiaries. So stop it.

This would be relevant if entitlement programs weren't FEDERALLY funded. Municipalities tend to rely more on fees-for-services and local/county taxes.
Your argument fails, again.
Look, many immigrants come from countries with governments that are less than stellar when it comes to human rights. To purposely misinform them by outright misguiding them, saying that government employees are rewarded/awarded for turning them away empty handed is hardly conducive to giving them a slight chance at a decent life here. So, again, stop it.

considering they are the distributors of the benefit, yeah following their online instructions would be a good starting point..
misinformation and assumptions in this thread..mostly proffered by singledad2usc. par for course...

And will likely result in yet another thread lock - par for the course.
Why he hasn't been banned altogether for these shenanigans is beyond me.

Get a Lawyer to represent you in court, you can ask that your husband bare the costs of your Lawyer fees when all judgements have been set in place, also file for retroactive child support, you can ask that your husband pay child support up until your son graduates University, make sure he helps pay for child care, health insurance for your son and help with extra curricula activities your son may take up in the future. I know you said you were in the So Cal area, unfortunately I don't know anything about their legal/court system, but consult with a Lawyer and if necessary ask them to file a motion to delay the case if you feel you do not have enough time to get the necessary paperwork etc ready for court. Protect yourself at all costs, after all you have been through you need to look after yourself and your little boy, good luck

Get a Lawyer to represent you in court, you can ask that your husband bare the costs of your Lawyer fees when all judgements have been set in place, also file for retroactive child support, you can ask that your husband pay child support up until your son graduates University, make sure he helps pay for child care, health insurance for your son and help with extra curricula activities your son may take up in the future. I know you said you were in the So Cal area, unfortunately I don't know anything about their legal/court system, but consult with a Lawyer and if necessary ask them to file a motion to delay the case if you feel you do not have enough time to get the necessary paperwork etc ready for court. Protect yourself at all costs, after all you have been through you need to look after yourself and your little boy, good luck

Singedad2USC- do you have any facts, websites or news articles to back up what you posted?

Where do you come up with this garbage?

Every single bit of information anyone needs to know about public benefits is, indeed, available online - public money, public information, that's the way it works. To say otherwise is to misinform. To say government employees are somehow rewarded for not providing services to those who qualify is a patent lie.

AGAIN, where do you get this garbage?
YOU can't diagnose anyone. Nor can YOU determine or decide which benefits someone will or will not be eligible for.
The immigration related question was asked and answered. YOUR experience with this is irrelevant as YOU have never filed for or been subject to immigration.
Stop behaving like a benefit expert because YOU ARE NOT.

As I have less tolerance of you who have taken the "S" out of serious. Every situation is not a vawa, nor should every immigrate stay in the US if their new life is not working out.

This was NOT OP's original question. His original question was can he adjust status and stay without being married to her anymore. SingleDad I'm shocked you're still up in arms about this VAWA thing.

i'm wondering which state make ONLY $6 minimum wage? hhhhmmm are you sure your not exaggerating your story? just saying

The husband needs to eat, and the wife is required to care for his needs. If he is going to bed hungry then she is not supporting him in a satifactory fashion. She told the government that she would care for his needs as he is not able to financially support himself. The way it sounds to me is that the wife is not holding up her part of the bargain.

OP is not from England.
If you're from Liberia I am certain your views about running back home will be different.
He'll be going back ashamed and looked at as a failure.

I think you are misrepresented here, for what purpose I don't know.
Not to sidetrack OPs thread but your case is vastly diffrent from his. You were trying to VAWA yeasrs after your separation and hoping that VAWA can be retroactively applied from when it occured to suspecting that your Ex has CItizenship now.
I do agree that we as Men have to play by different standards when it comes to the family system.

Are you giving up on the process? If you are, then turning in your green card shoudl absolve your sponsor. Else the sponsor is on the hook until you reach citizenship or work 40 quarters.
With the green card you don't need to be with yoru EX to pursue the process as long as you can show that you entered the marriage in good faith and you have proof like joint stuff.
With a green card you should not have a ban though there are other requirements such as residency to maintain the card.

She doesn't love you in the slightest to be treating you in this way, and you didn't really know her before you married her. There's zero need for you to put up with this abuse. Cut the ties now and restart your life. You'll feel as though the weight of the world has been lifted from your shoulders, si man!
I used to be married to something like that.

Sounds like you're looking at extensive counseling if you want to save your marriage or a divorce.
Think about what YOU want and where YOU want to live/ and who you want to live with! Once you know that people on this board can help you figure out how to get where you want to be

If you believe that the marriage is not going to improve then you should consider divorce. Would your spouse be willing to participate in any sort of marriage counselling?
There is no immigration "penalty" for divorcing. You would have to wait until you've been a GC holder for 5 years in order to apply for US citizenship.
Divorce is no fun, but is survivable.

She is not entitled to anything except what is awarded to her by a court. She is not "automatically" entitled to any of his retirement pay, it must be court ordered if the court determines she is deserving of it and since they have been married less than 10 years the military, specifically DFAS, will not automatically make the payments to her, she would have to obtain them from him through civil actions.
The I-134 is not legally binding and is not even a contract between him and her, it is between him and the US government. Legally he has no obligation to her other than as a normal spouse has to the other one, which is not much. I am even surprised she was permitted to live in military housing since she has no legal status in the US. If she wishes to obtain any benefits she will need to file VAWA and fight him in family court. She had and still has a military ID card and he was providing her housing until she moved out.
Morally he is dead wrong but legally I don't see where he has committed any crimes or violated any part of the UCMJ.
Again I advise her to go to the courthouse and review the file to find out what is really going on.

I am still questioning some of the things that happened. Whether it was through her inability or lack of desire to check on things herself or her trust of her husband or something else, she ignored some very good advice. She still, as I suggested several posts ago, needs to make a trip to the courthouse rather than taking her "spouse's" word for what is going on. She was advised a while back to go to legal services on the military installation and looks like she belatedly did that but still didn't resolve anything.
She needs to go to the courthouse and obtain copies of what he filed or at least look at them with someone who has English as a first language and knows something about divorce or legal papers. She claims she was served only a few days ago with papers for a divorce/custody hearing in January 2013 and I advised her then that I was very skeptical of this being correct as that is a very long time, usually the initial hearing is scheduled for no more than 60 days after filing. Now, based on her "spouse's" facebook page it is assumed she is divorced and lost custody of the child.
GO TO THE COURTHOUSE and look at the file, don't base your actions on what the "spouse" claims is going on. And if he had her served with fake papers (which the MP's would not have done this as it is a state matter, a sheriff would have done it) she may have grounds to fight whatever might be happening.

Incorrect. If she takes the child without a letter SPECIFICALLY stating that he is permitting the child to relocate she can be charge with international child kidnapping. He can claim she was just going to "visit" with the child. Not to mention some airlines won't let you board without a current letter giving permission to travel with the child. He can also put a hold on the passport stating he's worried she's going to "run away" with the baby. Having a letter stating he knew she was moving with the child, and gave permission for it, protects her.

You sound like a teacher, you are in the same position as myself.
As a teacher of children, my first job is to protect the child, not the parent. I do not, nor can I, report a child if they are illegally in the country. If I report them, then I run the risk of sending them to a lesser environment where their health, family, and education may become at risk. It is not my job to verify if the parent is in the country legally (that is the job of the board of education)and it is not my job to punish the child for the mistake of the parents.
For me, I justify it as knowing the child is fed (2 meals a day at school at least), educated and cared for. If I notice an aspect of abuse or neglect, then it becomes a different issue
but then again, I deal with children
Good luck